What if Darth Maul had captured Queen Amidala?

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Darth Pipes, Aug 12, 1999.

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  1. Darth Pipes Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 12, 1999
    star 5
  2. Darth Pipes Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 12, 1999
    star 5
  3. Darth Pipes Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 12, 1999
    star 5
  4. offsprey5 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 18, 1999
    OK.

    *********************************************
    Again,he didn't want any trouble.That horned alien was now with the queen or with the pilot,he thought. He kept thinking about Padme though. Thinking like that made him nervous;nervousness made him restless,and he was already fairly restless as it is.

    So Jar-Jar Binks found himself crawling though the ventilation shafts trying to find Padme. He didn't know what he was going to do next.

    "Oh,Jar-Jar," He mumbled to himself as his lanky form scooted along the shaft, swimming-like,trying to make less noise as possible,"Whata are you doin' now?"

    He came to another hub with intersecting corridors going in every prime direction.
    He listened intently with his long,floppy ears for any eachoing sound,preferably talking,down each corridor. All his eyes could see wa just silvery tunnels streching very far or curving to who-knows-what.

    "Am I losta?" He asked himself as he fought down a creeping sense of claustaphobia with a gulp. He sighed in self pity.

    He thought he heard a muffled sound down to his left and moved toward it. As he reached a few feet in the new tunnel,he came upon a chute with a metal grid covering it. He peered down though the grid,but could see very little.

    He pulled on the grid with a mightly ysnk,putting in all the strength he could muster. The grid came off with a loud klang.

    Jar-Jar cringed at the sound as he peered into the now opened chute to see some greyish tubing lining the tunnel walls with some nozzles purtuding from them,and a dim light projecting a grille pattern on the floor.

    Jar-Jar,himming with curiousity,bent in to get a closer look at some markings on tubes when he suddenly slipped and lost his balance.The momentum pulled him down the chute.

    He desparately grabbed onto the nozzles which flung him erect,but the nozzles broke promptly and he felt hard on the floor on his bottom. "Aiee,my butta." He whimpered.

    Just then,a shadow shifted into the grill's light beside him. he crotched back into the darkness to hide,but he had very little room and was trapped. He shuddered as the shadow came closer.


    *********************************************



    [This message has been edited by offsprey5 (edited 02-27-2000).]
  5. Darth Pipes Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 12, 1999
    star 5
  6. Mara (Mary) Jade Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 15, 2000
    OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Gimme, gimme, gimme more!!!!!!
  7. Mon Calamari Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 1999
    star 1
  8. fett 4 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jan 2, 2000
    star 4
    Love this story please more Maul fight scenes.
  9. Darth Mulacki Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 4, 1999
    star 5
  10. Mon Calamari Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 1999
    star 1
  11. offsprey5 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 18, 1999
    Ok,folks. I've completed my recent post for you to read. I'm very sorry I was late,but I had other things to do and a little writer's block. but i think my mojo is flowing again and should have a new post or more in a couple days at maximum.

    Thanks for the compliments
  12. Darth Pipes Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 12, 1999
    star 5
    I've been concentrating on other fanfic too but a good job offsprey5!
  13. Shadowen Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    May 11, 1999
    star 3
    Jar Jar might become useful?

    Whoa. More! I wanna see this...
  14. Grand Admiral Sonny Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Mar 6, 2000
    Karl Katarn and Mara Jade were heavily involved in the transfer of the Death Star plans.

    Is this just made up or was it rumoured before? Especially since Karl Katarn is in the game Star Wars: Dark Forces.
  15. lazerman Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Nov 30, 1998
    I do not know sir, but it shows the kind of writing that went into TDR, they were able to bring together alot of EU characters into a Pre-quel of thier own.

    My opinion: I do not think that Karl and Mara would be involved if they wrote it into EU, but who knows.

    [This message has been edited by lazerman (edited 03-11-2000).]
  16. Darth Ludicrous Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jun 25, 2000
    star 5
    They used the EU characters indiscriminate of the EU characters' backstories and historys. Mara was never in the Rebellon, and never with Zev Senesca. The Dark Redempton was nothing more than poorly researched eye candy, in my opinion.
  17. Mon Calamari Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 3, 1999
    star 1
  18. offsprey5 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 18, 1999
    OK. Sorry to take so long. i been worknig on some outlines and stuff and fleshing them out a bit. So, here is more.

    *********************************************
    Panaka moved toward a vent grille where a loud,crashing noise was while gusturing to Padme to stay where she was. A muffled squeal followed from the vent.

    He opened the vent to see a certain frightened gungan hiding in the shadows. "What are you doing here?" He demanded,contorting his face in disgust.

    "Ahhh," Jar-Jar began as he emerged from the shadows,pursing his lips in some thought, "I hava come to help you."

    Panaka smirked with little humor.Doesn't this. Doesn't this gungan know the seriousness of the situation. "You? Help us?

    "Ah huh." Jar-Jar replied,poking his beaked head out of the grate. He turned to see Padme tending to one of the fallen handmaidens,who laying against bulkhead like a rag doll. "Hey,Padme,glada to see you ok." The discerning look on her face and alomst immedately fell silent. "Came ata wrong time,eh?"

    "Yes," Panaka said instantly.

    "No," Padme said at the same time.

    Panaka and Padme looked at each other startled. padme's glare hardened as Panaka's grimmaced embarrassingly. Jar-Jar looked on in puzzlement.

    "How could you even think of helping us?" Padme asked finally," Too many have been injured already."

    "Mesa thinkin we could find the queen,but you knowsa these ship better.Mesa had a time finding these place."

    "And do what after-" Panaka began.

    Padme was studying the gungan during this exchange. He seemed to really want to help,but how? She then brightened at a sudden thought. " Captain Panaka," she called,"come here."

    They both went to a far corner and spoke quietly." I need to get a message to Sabe. She need to know what to do in case they separate us.Maybe Jar-Jar can help us in that."

    Panaka didn't like the idea. "What about comlinks?" He asked.

    "The com system could be compamised now. Any coded message might arouse suspision."

    "True," Panaka agreed grimly, "maybe we could send a recorded message.". Panaka took out his comlink and began adjusting the wiring.

    "Yes,but I would have to speak boldly and clearly." Padme said.

    Panaka nodded.He turned to Jar-Jar "Go back up the shaft and wait. You will be given a message to send to the queen."

    Jar-Jar was hesitant," But-"

    "The message between the queen and her handmaiden itself is not your concern."

    Jar-Jar shrugged and went back the shaft a bit.

    After Padme recorded the message on the comlink.Panaka tried to squeeze through the vent to give it to Jar-Jar. "It's a tight fit."

    "Let's me try." Padme said. Her small frame squeeze through easily.

    Jar-Jar was suspended inbetween the shaft.Padme reached up with the comlink. "Here,and be careful."

    "Okay." Jar-Jar replied as he reached Down for the comlink,using the crooked nozzle mid-shift for support.

    Suddenly,the nozzle retched again,broke,and shot gas downward and upward through the ragged seal. Jar-Jar's nose seal up defensively like a snorkel. He moved up a liitle to resupport himself. Padme didn't have such defense and nearly succombed to a point blank blast in the face.

    Panaka saw Padme's slumping form and grabbed at it to pull her out as gas began to come out of the vent and into the bay.

    Meanwhile in a full panic,Jar-Jar scooted and climbed frantically up to the above tunnel,trying to escape the rapidly rising gas.He grasped unto the upper grille cover dangling over the lip of the chute as he pulled himself up it. The cover slipped in and fell down into the larger shaft.

    Panaka misatakely sucked in some of the gas,weaken his grip and slowed his progress of pulling Padme out. He saw the cover slamming edgewise onto Padme's head suddenly,causing a small gash. Panaka mouthed "No," before being fully overcome by the gas himself.

    *********************************************

    Okay,I may mofdify this later,so stay tuned.

    I will come back with more,it's not over yet
  19. Darth Pipes Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 12, 1999
    star 5
    Great job offsprey5! Good to see you back in action.
  20. fett 4 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jan 2, 2000
    star 4
    Great story but would not Maul have killed all the others except for the Queen after all he did not need them any more.
  21. Darth Pipes Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 12, 1999
    star 5
  22. Alpha_Ferdante Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 28, 1999
    star 2
    Just found this thread today.

    What a fantastic read!

    Thought I'd post to bring it a little closer to the top, letting the authors know that others are reading it (and enjoying it).

  23. offsprey5 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 18, 1999
    Hey,Shadowen,how your fanfic coming?

    Thanks,Alpha_ForDante,for the support.

    Well,anyway,here a short scene:
    *********************************************
    The sith interceptor glacefully glided around the dark side of Coroscuant after exiting hyperspace. Obi-Wan knew he was to meet another jedi somewhere,but the details were cryptic and vague. Perhaps this was a way of drawing out any other Sith by making them reach out for infomation. He wondered about his future. Wondering if he was going to be able to complete his training under another master,if their where any available.

    He remebered how Qui-Gon was only master available to teach him when his basic training under Master Yoda ended,and then how long it was to gain his respect.

    Be mindful of the present,young pawadan
    Could then things be different now,perhaps they would think was ready for the trails, especially after surving a fight with a Sith Lord.

    Then there was the matter with Anakin. Perhaps,he should have left him behind affterall. Obi-Wan couldn't speak for him in front of of the council just yet. Some things will still have to be done.So many things,he knows that for sure.

    "He will have to learn patence." Obi-Wan said to himself.

    "Huh," said a child's voice,"Are we there yet?"

    Obi-Wan glance to see Anakin standing there. Obi-Wan pressed his lips in slight embrassment--thinking of the future rather than the present."We are here.You can look if you want." He pointed at the cockpit window.

    Anakin immediately moved toward the edge and became wide-eyed at the spectacle. "Whoa.It's so big."

    Obi-Wan smirked. Perhaps distaction might work better than patence for now.




    [This message has been edited by offsprey5 (edited 04-21-2000).]
  24. Darth Pipes Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 12, 1999
    star 5
    Solid job as always offsprey5!
  25. Alpha_Ferdante Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 28, 1999
    star 2
    Just bringing this back up.
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