What's your problem with feminists?

Discussion in 'Archive: The Senate Floor' started by womberty, Aug 16, 2002.

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  1. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    I think the parents still need to know. As I said before, if the birth control fails, who is going to have to take up the financial burden? And most parents are at least reasonable and won't beat their kids if they find out they are having sex. Parents deserve to know. They deserve a chance to try and persuade their kid otherwise. And they can sure make it harder for their kid to have sex if they keep them from going out. May sound harsh. But it's a parent's right.
  2. solojones Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 27, 2000
    star 9
    ITA Rebeca. Parents have to be able to do the parenting, it is their right.

    -sj loves kevin spacey
  3. dustchick Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 12, 2000
    star 1
    I don't know that the majority of people encourage teens to have sex. Sure, there are cues in the media and fashion that glorify teenage sex, but I think that teens have to make their own decisions. I wish more parents had a clue where their children were after hours or that they were responsible enough to know their children's friends, etc... I think those teenagers who choose to use birth control should be lauded for their responsible action.

    I knew a lot of girls who got pregnant in high school, starting in our freshman year. Only one couple had supportive parents, and they chose to have the child and give it up for adoption. Several of the other girls had such disinterested parents that they GAVE BIRTH before the parents knew they were pregnant. There's alot of blame to cast about here, but NOT to Planned Parenthood.

    I know, I know - parents can't always know what their children are doing. (Trust me :) ) I'm just tired of people blaming support organizations like Planned Parenthood for failures/difficulties in the home.

    And back to the feminist aspect of the thread, reproductive rights are still being fought over in regions of the world, which is why "abstinence only" methods in certain countries are so ludicrous. Remember, in some places, it is a wife's duty to have sex with her husband. If she doesn't want to get pregnant, what else other than use birth control can she do?

    I maintain that there is still room for feminism in the world - not to give women more rights than men, but to ensure that the aspects of our lives that are uniquely feminine are under our control. And I think some of our younglings just haven't experienced gender discrimination yet, not that I wish them to.
  4. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    Regardless of whether the teenagers are being responsible by using birth control or not, if they are underage, their parents need to know they are seeking it.
  5. dustchick Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 12, 2000
    star 1
    Rebecca191, I must humbly disagree. The kids who are getting birth control aren't the problem - it's the teens having sex WITHOUT birth control that need intervention. And how are those parents supposed to be informed?

    Night-night, all!
  6. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    If someone who is underage is seeking any sort of medical care, the parent needs to know. The teen is their responsibility. Any consequences will end up being their burden. Birth control doesn't always work. Precautions against STDs do not always work. And if a parent wants to do all they can to prevent their kid from having sex, including not letting them go out and have fun, whatever, it is fully within their rights. Any other type of medical help, the parent would be notified. Birth control should be no different, just because it's a touchy subject.
  7. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    And if a parent wants to do all they can to prevent their kid from having sex, including not letting them go out and have fun, whatever, it is fully within their rights.

    Now you're starting to venture into a realm I don't like much. Too much control is a bad thing, and people have to enter the real world sometime. Just should be with common sense.
  8. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    Why should parents just let their kids go out and have sex, when the parents are going to be the ones who have to deal with the consequences?

    It's their right if they want to do whatever they can to stop their kids. In this case, I think it would be justified.
  9. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    Teens have their own lives. Parents don't need to (and shouldn't, as too much control backfires 9 times out of 10) control their kids that much. Often, it only results in a reverse effect when they go out on their own, when people are so happy with their newfound freedom that they do foolish things.

    Moderation is essential.
  10. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    Yeah, and what about the kids who become pregnant anyway, and keep the kids, their parents end up having to pay the baby's medical care costs, and for clothing, diapers, etc, childcare if no one can watch the baby, the list goes on. I think it's completely within parents' rights to do all they can to prevent their kids from making choices they feel are harmful.
  11. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    If parents try to control their children to that extent at that age, other problems start to crop up.

    It's not wise to make a rule because of the exception. Just because you can does not mean you should.
  12. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    And I think parents should stop their kids from having sex, then. When kids have sex as teenagers, it generally does more harm than good. Why shouldn't parents protect their kids from that?
  13. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    More than any other reason, because it's not their jobs to after a certain point. You can teach your children everything you know and what to do and not do, but after a time, it just isn't their responsibility anymore, regardless of what the law says.

    When kids have sex as teenagers, it generally does more harm than good.

    I partly agree with that, but more because of the emotional effects of sex than anything else.

    Parents can only do so much. Keeping their children from the real world if their children wish to be themselves isn't something they can do (after about 16 or so).
  14. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    Until 18, parents have the right to make decisions for their kids. If 16 was the age of adulthood, fine. But it isn't.
  15. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    Again, just because they have the "right" doesn't mean they should use those "rights."

    Think common sense and reasonableness here, not just what the law says. A parent can and should only do so much. A teenager has to be responsible for themselves as well. Believe me (and I've heard of this time and again in reality), teens that are kept from going out and doing stuff while they live with their parents very often get into major trouble when they leave.
  16. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    And I think it's common sense for parents to try and keep their kids from having sex.

    At least when they are old enough to live on their own, they will actually BE older, and have a better chance at being emotionally mature.

    Edit: I don't think we're going to get anywhere on this, so for now I'm stopping. Really, I guess it's up to the individual parent. I want kids someday, but I am TRULY NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO THEM BEING TEENAGERS. Maybe things will have changed by then. I hope they will have.
  17. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    And I think it's common sense for parents to try and keep their kids from having sex.

    At least when they are old enough to live on their own, they will actually BE older, and have a better chance at being emotionally mature.


    I'm curious as to how you would have parents keep their kids from having sex. Please elaborate, if you would.

    At 17, I doubt you've seen the other side as I have, but when teenagers move out on their own after being held back or in by parents, the effect is almost always negative. Bad things can and often do happen. Not always... but often. I don't mean to make an issue of age, but I trust you'll understand what I mean.
  18. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    Well, they can try talking to them first. That's probably the best option. Could always try scaring them, by having them take care of a baby and see how hard it is. But I don't think it's that bad if a parent punishes their kid by not allowing them to go out socially if they found out they were having sex.

    There's plenty of other things parents can let kids do to make them feel more like adults. Drive, have a job, etc. They don't need to just let them go off and have sex.

    Anyway, I'm out of this for tonight.
  19. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    But I don't think it's that bad if a parent punishes their kid by not allowing them to go out socially if they found out they were having sex.

    Oh.... :). This all makes me smile. Sex in itself is not a bad thing. I would hope you discriminate between good, responsible sexual activity and the negative kind. Teenagers are curious and often intimate people, especially when it comes to solid relationships. You cannot control human nature, and they will find a way to do what they want. Better to go with it and adapt, keeping them informed and working with them than trying to keep them from what they will one day be able to experience without any reigns upon them at all.

    If teenagers wish to have sex, so be it. It's not something for legally adult people only. I'm not referring to young teens, but older ones (17 and up, really). The idea that teenagers cannot and should not have sex at all makes me want to smile and be frustrated at the same time.

    :).
  20. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    And I told myself I'd stop, but...

    It's a bad thing if you're not emotionally ready. And I don't think many teenagers are. They have sex because their hormones tell them are, peer pressure, or they feel they have to, to stay in a relationship. And I don't think these are good reasons, and I don't think a parent should support these reasons.
  21. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    It can be a bad thing if you're not emotionally ready, yes. Believe it or not, there are other reasons for being intimate. Not all teenagers do it for the "right" reasons, but I think more do than you might believe. Teens are curious about each other by nature, and when you combine that with a relationship, sexual activity can result. Does it always work out? Of course not. It just needs to be done responsibily. You have to gain emotional maturity somehow, and sometimes it comes with experience, not the other way around.


    Whether a parents supports those reasons or not is immaterial to me. It's for the teen to decide what they want to do. Sex does not automatically equal pregnancy or something bad. The idea of parents telling me that I could not have sex (whether I wanted to or not), or telling a girlfriend that she couldn't, would simply be unacceptable to me.
  22. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    To those who are in this debate for the actual subject, I apologize for completely shifting this thread off topic. Perhaps a new thread about teenage sex and its ramifications would be better?
  23. Rebecca191 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 1999
    star 6
    Doesn't everything your parents do usually seem unnaceptable when you're a teenager? ;)

    I've never had to worry about my parents keeping me from doing something. I'm like the perfect teenager... people would die for a kid like me.

    Edit: Yeah, that might be a good idea.
  24. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    I've never had to worry about my parents keeping me from doing something. I'm like the perfect teenager... people would die for a kid like me.

    Well, that's good to hear :). But reality for most teens is somewhat different.
  25. KnightWriter Administrator Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 6, 2001
    star 8
    Actually, the abstinence-only sex ed thread would be just fine for this discussion. So... if we could move talk into there, that'd be good :).

    And as for feminism... What are some thoughts as to what it would take for feminism to be more accepted (real feminism, that is) by society in general?
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