Saga When Darth Vader Was a Lad (H.M.S. Pinafore parody)

Title: When Darth Vader Was a Lad
Author: DWH
Timeframe: The life of Darth Vader
Genre: Humor
Notes: This was actually thrown together in about fifteen minutes in response to a captioned photo on Facebook, where Darth Vader was purportedly demanding that a Starfleet officer sing songs from H.M.S. Pinafore. So it's not perfect, but it was a lot of fun. This is to the tune of the Admiral's song, "When I was a lad."

When Darth Vader Was a Lad
Darth Vader and Chorus

When I was a lad I served quite hard
As slave to Watto in his ship junkyard
I cleaned the pit droids and I washed the floors
And I polished up the racers and the spare ship doors
(He polished up the racers and the spare ship doors)

I polished those ship doors so carefully
That now I rule all the Imperial Navee
(He polished those ship doors so carefully
that now he rules all the Imperial Navee)

As slave to Watto I was such an ace
That I was rescued by Jedi who came by our place
I raced my pod with a smile so great
Even though I almost lost it right out of the gate
(Even though he almost lost it right out of the gate)

I raced my pod with a hand so free
That now I rule all the Imperial Navee
(He raced his pod with a hand so free
That now he rules all the Imperial Navee)

In piloting ships I made such a name
That a padawan I soon became
I wore clean robes and brand new shoes
To the vic'try celebration there in Theed, Naboo
(To the vict'ry celebration there in Theed, Naboo)

That vict'ry celebration went so well for me
That now I rule all the Imperial Navee
(That vict'ry celebration went so well for he
That now he rules all the Imperial Navee)

Of Jedi knowledge I acquired such a feat
That they gave me a Jedi Council seat
And that Jedi Council seat, I ween
Is the most responsible I'd been
(Is the most responsible he'd been)

But that kind of seat so suited me
That now I rule all the Imperial Navee
(But that kind of seat so suited he
That now he rules all the Imperial Navee)

I grew so evil that I was called
To kill the Jedi in the temple halls
I always acted at my Master's call
And never thought of thinking for myself at all
(He never thought of thinking for himself at all)

I thought so little they rewarded me
By having me rule the Imperial Navee
(He thought so little they rewarded he
By having him rule the Imperial Navee)

Now landsmen all, wherever you may be
If you want to climb to the top of the tree
If your soul isn't fettered to a junkyard stool
Be careful to be guided by this golden rule
(Be careful to be guided by this golden rule)

Run far far away
And be as evil as can be
Then you all may rule the Imperial Navee!
(Run far far away, be as evil as can be
Then we all may rule the Imperial Navee!)

 

Fun poem, and impressive how little time that took you! Navee is going to be stuck in my head now too. Hehe.

 

Brilliant take on the HMS Pinafore...very enjoyable.

 

Love that! And I have a vision of Hugh Laurie singing it aloud. As the character of Bertie Wooster in the brilliant BBC series "Wooster & Jeeves" he sang such songs as "Minnie the Moocher" in front of his piano.

 

I love this. You did a great job of adapting that song to SW

 

Hee!

 

That was awesome!!

I'm impressed how fast you wrote it! It takes me forever to make things rhyme and then it usually doesn't make any sense!