Before Where Honor Lies (Padme's childhood, and one of the last honorable senators) UPDATE 12/1/05

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by lost_jedii, Nov 20, 2005.

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  1. lost_jedii Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2005
    star 2
    Title: Where Honor Lies
    Author: Lost_jedii
    Timeframe: This is still a bit undecided, for now I think, about, anywhere from 4-8 years before TPM.
    Characters: Some of my OC's, a young Padme', young Anakin Skywalker, and some other characters owned by George Lucas.
    Genre: Drama, a bit of action and a little bit of romance, some other things too.
    Summary: This is a story about an OC of mine who is, excluding Padme', pretty much the only other honorable senator/representative of Naboo so far. There will also be some Padme'/Anakin moments, etc. It's kind of hard to explain, please read and tell me what you think! :)
    Notes: I'm really sorry if this story doesn't go along with the books, I sadly haven't kept up with them. I tried to keep some things vague so it wouldn't go too much out of the story line. I hope you guys like this, please give me any type of criticism you want, I need all the help I can get. Thanks for taking the time to read this And, on a last note, it's sad to say but I never really knew Anakin and Padme's exact ages in TPM, but I'm guessing Padme' was about 15 or 16 and he was 9 or 10? So, in my story, some parts Padme' is younger but for the most part she is about 14. Also, I've never really been sure of whose Padme's parents or family was, and how she ended up becoming queen, so this is partially my tale of it.



    Oh, again, George Lucas owns many of the characters in here. I just own my OC's, etc. Anyways, I hope you guys like this





    Chapter 1



    The landscape changed in a rush of motion, turning into a blur of rich colors. The sky was a pale blue, and the lakes were still full. The greenary was still dazzling, even to the locals. Everything about the nature on Naboo was something people had to stop and stare at. The speeder stopped for a moment, the regular crowd boarding on. Sann Clien watched the landscape from the window, silently waiting for it to become an endless blur again. Most senators, or any representatives for that matter, would have had their own speeder or transport to take them places, but Sann preferred the common transports. He always had been one to believe people of high political rank didn't deserve anything better than what the people got.

    "Senator, good morning! How are you today?" A man with bright blue eyes and pitch black hair welcomed him as he sat next to him. Sann shook his head and grinned. "We've been over this. Please call me Sann. But I'm doing well, and you Mick?" He nodded and finally smiled. "The best one could be, I guess." Sann's violet eyes immediately rushed with emotion. What a stupid thing to ask a man who had just lost a child. He put his hand on the man's shoulder. "I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me today, that was probably the most inconsiderate thing I could have said." Mick shook his head, focusing his cloudy eyes. "Don't worry; sometimes I forget it's real too." He whispered, his voice choking up. "Mick?I am so sorry for your loss. It shouldn't have happened to him, Rion was the last person who deserved that." "He was the last?he was?" Mick spoke softly, finally shaking his head after a few moments.

    "There is no time to grieve here. There is only work up to our necks that will soon surge to our mouths until it gets so far above our heads we won't even be able to breathe. Corruption seems to be the common theme here. Tell me senator, do you predict there will ever be change for us?" Sann watched the blur start to slowly slow down. The colors were starting to create actual shapes. That was the question he had asked himself many, many times. He too felt like he was drowning in the sea of heads in the senate, drowning in the slowly corruption of the Republic. Naboo was so beautiful, yet so doomed to recover. He sighed, staring at the now solid trees and lakes. "Yes, someday...I believe there will be change, for all of us." He forced his voice to sound firm, forced himself to believe. The galaxy was still good, the Sith hadn't been seen in decades, o
  2. BrentusofGath Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 12, 2005
    star 4
    His eyes softed, as if he could sense her thoughts of the last city they'd been to. His heart flared as well, and what she had not seen were the stains on his own face from what he had seen, and all those months he had debated with the council to send aide there, to stop what was going on, but none of it had worked, despite what the few good people on the council had fought so desperately for.

    I liked this. If you're into PMing with updates, please send me one.
  3. lost_jedii Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2005
    star 2
    Thank you so much!! I'm so glad you liked it, I was worried what people would think. I am most definitely into PMing with updates :D Thanks again for reading and commenting :)
  4. lost_jedii Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2005
    star 2
    Any other readers out there? [-o|
  5. hyperspace_police FanForce CR Arkansas US

    Chapter Rep
    Member Since:
    Jun 22, 2005
    star 4
    This looks interesting.

    Looking forward to more

    Keep up the good work!!
  6. lost_jedii Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2005
    star 2
    hyperspace_police - Thank you so much for reading and commenting [:D] So glad you like it :)

    Here's chapter 2, sorry it took so long to get up (writer's block). Please let me know what you think (is it getting boring or stale, etc? I had this feeling that it was while I was editing). Thanks again for reading :)





    Chapter 2


    "We must send troops with the trade ships. Otherwise, with all these lootings of late, all the supplies that these planets so desperately need could get stolen before it even gets to them." Some of the Senate nodded in agreement while others shouted out. "Do you have any idea how much this would cost? Or where are we going to find a bunch of young men for this?" It continued on and on like that, on and on about these pointless problems. There hadn?t been any lootings on the United Runs ships in months, the only reason why this was even being discussed was because of the vast amounts of money and wealth on the trade ships that had some of the senators worried out of their minds. Sann Clien sighed, staring at their holographic faces. He and the other senators/representatives of Naboo had met in one of the palace's largest (and most quiet) communication rooms. Some of the senators had gone to Coruscant for the routine debates, but most communicated through the hologram airways. He had tried for hours to get a word in about serious issues on Tatooine and other planets in desperate need for life necessities. Each time he tried or managed to get their attention a chorus of shouts always broke out over another issue and he'd lost the whole crowd's attention. Councilman Vens, who was on his right, shifted the weight of his feet, also staring intently as another argument broke out.

    "Excuse me, members of the Senate; I have an important issue that needs urgently to be discussed." Sann finally managed to cut in again, and all heads of the representatives turned to look at his holographic form. "Fights and riots have broken out all across the planet of Sarrens. Hundreds of innocents have been killed. Children are roaming the streets without parents, men lay dieing of wounds, and women are starving. The people need help. There needs to be medical aide, food, water sent, a committee brought up, and a democracy of the people so everyone can have a say. Sources have confirmed that was the main reason of the riots, the people have been cheated of all their rights." Murmurs raced across the mouths of the senators, whispers, and shouts of what to do began to brake out. "Why should we help people who have brought their ill fortune upon themselves? If they had no rights and needed help they should have called for aide." Another chorus of voices broke out, agreeing. "Yes, all the planets have ways of communication! They could have called for the Senate and the Republic's aide! Instead they needlessly put their lives and their loved ones in danger." Some shouted agreements to helping Sarrens, but more and more heads began to disagree. Sann's heart swelled with passion and his eyes began to burn, but he kept his face neutral, finding his center calm. "Members of the Senate, I agree partially with what you say. It is true they should have called for aide, but what if someone had disabled their communication systems, for example? And even if they were working perfectly, there were those of Sarrens who I'm sure wanted peace, those who had no say in stopping the rioters. What about the children?" That sent yet another murmur through the crowd, and more debates broke out. The Chancellor finally stood, pounding his seat table to command the peoples' attention.

    "We still have many issues to discuss and solve, many left unanswered and many to go. So let's take them one at a time. I propose we debate a solution as to how to help the people of Sarrens, and to see if there is a way to stop this high death toll and starvation rate from happening again." At this all the heads nodded their agreement, and Sann inwardly sighed in relief.
    _______________________________________________________
  7. BrentusofGath Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 12, 2005
    star 4
    Wow. They were having a nice cup of tea, kicking their feet up, and then POW! They get their socks knocked off, hopefully nothing more. :D

    I like the OCs. Keep up the good work!
  8. SITH_MAYO Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 3, 2005
    star 4
    Amazing! I love it!:D
    Your descriptions flow so well and easily, its well crafted, well done![:D]

    I really like reading Padme as a girl! This is interesting!

    More!!! More!!! er . . . please![face_batting]
  9. lost_jedii Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2005
    star 2
    BrentusofGath - Thank you for reading and commenting! :D So glad you liked the action :p (I know it was pretty brief though, only a paragraph). I wasn't sure if I did a good job describing the OC's, but I'm so glad you liked them :) Thanks again.

    SITH_MAYO - Thank you so much too for reading and commenting [:D] I'm so glad you like it! :D I was really worried how my writing would turn out, thank you so much for all of your really kind words! [:D] I hope I portray Padme' with the justice she deserves. Thanks again.
  10. BrentusofGath Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 12, 2005
    star 4
    UP! I wonder where my Padawan is? :(
  11. lost_jedii Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2005
    star 2
    I'm so, so sorry Master! :_| I feel so bad :( :( Finals ruled my life for a good amount of days there. I'm back, I promise! I'm really trying to fade my writer's block and muster up an update.
  12. BrentusofGath Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 12, 2005
    star 4
    A UP for my missing paddie.
  13. SITH_MAYO Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 3, 2005
    star 4
    Yes :confused: where are ya lost_jedii?!?!?![face_thinking]

    I still really like this story!:)
    I hope your writer's block disappears, so we get more posties!!![face_praying] [face_batting]

    UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!:p [face_alien_1] [face_chicken]
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