Why Would Anyone Remake This Movie? "Logan's Run"

"Planet of the Apes" (2001)

"Tim Burton seemed the perfect man to remake the 1968 sci-fi camp classic about a world where apes enslave men. But his rehash takes itself way too seriously and ditches the iconic original ending. (No Statue of Liberty shot?! Really?) As a result, it's the cinematic equivalent of monkey feces.'

Burton *does* seem perfect, but some projects just go wrong.

 

Wasn't Mark Wahlberg in Planet of the Apes? I think he needs to stay away from remakes and focus on executive producing more Entourage.

Since John Carpenter's The Thing.

 

I believe that Tim Burton was going back to the source material and trying a new approach to Planet of the Apes
I didn't love it, I didn't hate it.

 

I listened to the entire audio commentary by Tim Burton during the Planet of the Apes DVD. I don't want to defend the film or make excuses for it because it's definitely not one of his stronger films, but I had the impression that whatever he was trying to do with the film didn't fully reach the screen. (I'm not sure I know what he intended, but he sounded frustrated at times.) He was being diplomatic during some of the commentary about his relationship with the studio, which was apparently quite strained.

I think this was a case of somebody being hired for their vision, and then being forced to change it after the paycheck had been cashed. I'm just speculating though, I don't have any idea what actually happened.

I read somewhere that one day it got so bad that he walked off the set, and I've never heard of anything like that, that would be very strange for Tim to do that. He's a consummately professional filmmaker, so he would have had to be pretty angry to throw a hissy fit over something and storm off the set.

I'm paraphrasing but this was one thing he said about the making of the film:

"At a certain point, I realized I felt just like Mark Wahlberg's character. He was surrounded by apes, he had a huge responsibility and he didn't want to be there. I felt the same way about directing the film."

I'll let you draw your own conclusions.

This remake should not have been made...the original was and is a classic.

 

The film is terrible with some wonderful special effects. The "closer to the book" line doesn't hold up since the book has the apes in a technologically advanced society. The original film wasn't able to do this because of budget restrictions. What was the reason for making it this way considering film technology? This was an inferior remake and also a failed attempt at a franchise. With the ending there were 2 films that would have followed, similar to the structure of Back to the Future. Taylor would spend the second film trying to get to the past so he could correct it in the following film. This should have taught him to leave remakes alone but he would go at it again and fail with his next one.

 

Next: "The Pink Panther" (2006)

"Oh, Steve Martin, we've never been so disappointed in you. Not only do you star in this unfunny mess based on Peter Sellers' 1963 caper classic, but you're credited with co-writing. And by the way, you were robbed ... of that Razzie for Worst Remake or Rip-Off you were up for. Curse you, 'Little Man.'"


Don't know what to make of this film, except that it's a misguided misfire.

 

I actually found this film to be hilarious. It was well done IMO and had quite a few funny bits (especially with Clive Owen)

 

Failed with his next one?

Not just wrong, but dead wrong. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is the most successful movie Burton has ever made. (It's also one of the most successful remakes.) It earned more than what his 1989 Batman film did, and that was a huge hit with audiences. If you think Charlie & the CF failed aesthetically, that's fine, that's subjective, I'll give you that and I respect your opinion. But it made half a billion dollars, so I would not consider it one of his career failures. I can assure you almost every director in the world would like to have a failure that earns nearly half a billion dollars. And let's not get into the "money doesn't equal quality" argument, because I've already conceded that to you. (I think Burton's best films are ED WOOD and SWEENEY TODD, but they didn't make big bucks.) But let's not call a film a failure when it's a success.

Spielberg once said for a director, having a hit film in Hollywood is like getting your credit card renewed. It means you can charge more for your next project, and you have more creative freedom next time up to bat. So that's why it's important to have a hit film every once in awhile. One reason Francis Ford Coppola had so little control over the Dracula movie he made was he hadn't had a successful film in YEARS. So the studio called all the shots. A shame the director of the Godfather had that problem, but such are the realities of the film biz.

Never saw the Pink Panther remake. No longer a big Steve Martin fan.

 

I'm not talking box office, I'm talking quality. C&TCF is awful. Along the lines of Ron Howard's Grinch. Both successful financially, yet terrible films that can't hold a candle to their original incarnations.

 

I like The Pink Panther as well. I thought it was a fun little movie and I look forward to the sequel.

 

Just curious: Have you ever seen the original?

 

The remake was awful.

 

I passed on this one as I had the misfortune of working in a video store when this was coming to DVD so all day everyday the trailer played constantly. If I never hear that Hamburger joke again, I will die a happy man.

I always said that John Cleese would make a better Inspector Clouseau.

 

Peter Sellers is an exceedingly hard act to follow.

 

Yes I have, and several of the other Seller films. I actually think the original film drags, a lot. All of Blake Edwards' Panther films are guilty of being too long, including my favorites, Return of the Pink Panther and The Pink Panther Strikes Again. One of the best things about Steve Martin's film is that it's has a snappier pace. I would rank the new film somewhere around the middle when it comes to the overall series.

John Cleese will actually be replacing Kevin Kline in the next film.

 

Next: "City of Angels" (1998)

"Wim Wenders' 1987 'Wings of Desire' was about angels who observe and love humans. For "angels" substitute "Nicolas Cage as a creepy dead guy in a trenchcoat," for "observe ..." substitute "stalks Meg Ryan," and you've got this travesty of the transcendent original. Sometimes the dead should just stay dead."

 

City of Angels is a 1998 movie.

 

Noted.

 

"Down to Earth" (2001)

"Reconfiguring 'Heaven Can Wait' with Chris Rock assuming Warren Beatty's role, this time as an underground comic given another shot at life as a white wealthy stiff? Sounded like fish-out-of-water comedy gold. Instead it was as lifeless and stinky as, well, a fish out of water."

 

I never realized that City of Angels was a remake until I saw Wings of Desire in my German class my freshman year.

Peter Falk > Dennis Franz.

 

Next: "House of Wax" (2006)

"Paris Hilton's death scene -- in which the cleavage-sporting heiress is dispatched gruesomely (and hilariously) by a deranged redneck intent on filling a wax museum with corpses -- almost makes up for the horrendous plot, poor acting and lack of chills in this remake of the 1953 film of the same name ... almost."

 

"The Stepford Wives" (2004)

"We're not really sure what happened here: The '75 original was a neat little thriller; this star-studded remake came out some hodgepodge of comedy, satire and horror. Note to Nicole Kidman: Back away from the remakes ('Bewitched' might have made our list, too, if it were a movie redo)."


This *could* have been an interesting movie if anybody had actually known what they were doing.

 

Next: "The Ring Two" (2005)

"Whereas the first 'Ring' film pulled off an unbelievable feat and actually bested the J-horror film 'Ringu' upon which it was based (even more impressive considering it's about a VHS tape that kills you), its follow-up (based on 'Ringu 2') was about as scary (and funny) as an episode of 'Everybody Loves Raymond.'"

 

I'm so tired of American remakes of Japanese horror movies.

What we need are more Western Remakes of Samurai movies.