So NV Word to your moms I came to drop bombs!!!!

Discussion in 'SouthWest Region Discussion' started by Moka, Aug 18, 2002.

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  1. Talon_Wolfe Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 8, 2002
    star 4
    You are very good! You words evoke a plethora of emotions...


    :)
    :(
    :D
    [face_love]
    [face_mischief]
    :cool:
    [face_devil]
    8-}
    :mad:
    [face_laugh]
    ;)
    [face_blush]
    :_|
    :confused:
    [face_shocked]
    [face_plain]
  2. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    For you ALIAS Fans: I've never seen an episode, so don't get mad if I mess up a few details.


    There once was a man named Arvin Sloane.
    He's from the capital of Sierra Leone.
    He wanted to make a life of his own.
    He thought he got away from that Twilight Zone.

    He took a band class and played the trombone.
    The girls said he had the wit of Stallone
    coupled with the sexyness of Fred Flintstone.
    But the girls didn't like the smell of his cologne.

    When the head of the CIA was overthrown
    He tried to get the job, but he was still unknown.
    So he used the CIA as a stepping stone
    to take over the CIA all alone.

    His government plans he'd have to postpone,
    Because of the weed that he had homegrown.
    He cried all night, in the day he's just moan,
    But he took the US Government like a cyclone.

    And then there's the coolest guy: Marshall Flinkman.
    He hails all the way from the Republic of Sudan.
    He came up with a CIA employee stock ownership plan,
    But it was rejected and tossed by "the Man".

    Then one morning he traveled to Japan.
    He bought a tuxedo and a minivan.
    The only thing he needs is a long attention span.
    Cuz he gets distracted by the ceiling fan.

    For breakfast he eats a bowl of Raisin Bran.
    For lunch, to get iron, eats a soda can.
    He stays up late at night watching for Peter Pan.
    And ends up getting chased by the Klu Klux Klan.

    He has a girlfriend named Marianne.
    She lives in a cave in Afganistan.
    He get's kinda lonely, but he best friend Dan
    Set him up with his younger sister named Suzanne.

    And finally this brings us to Sydney Bristow.
    She once had a major crush on Vincent Van Gogh.
    She spends her life protecting the Status Quo.
    But in her spare time she's training to be a tennis pro.

    Her name is Sydney, which is so apropos.
    I don't know what that means, it rhymes well though.
    She has a favorite movie, and it's called Fargo.
    She saw it just last night on H.B.O.

    One day when she was eating a Sloppy Joe
    The clouds began to form and it started to snow.
    How she stayed alive, I really don't know.
    Maybe she made a sweater out of some Play-Doh

    She's always on her computer, falls asleep by the glow.
    But she never knows who's friend and who is foe.
    She requests to be buried atop a Grand Canyon plateau.
    Man, ALIAS is one crazy Television show!
  3. Luminara_Jade Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 4
    hmmm... super-cia agents don't use play-dough.
  4. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    Well... it's actually a super play-doh used only in the CIA.
  5. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    You can call him Darth Tyrannus or just Count Dooku;
    But a song about this guy has been long overdue;
    Let's start from the begining, he's from Kalamazoo;
    And he grew listening to songs from Blink 182.

    He said his life was screwed up by some Orthodox Jew;
    So he was a constant target of the A.C.L.U.;
    But his favorite actor was Gérard Depardieu;
    He wanted to be like him, even used the same shampoo.

    Ask him his favorite foods, and he will list a few;
    He enjoys a lot of spices in his Endor Turkey stew;
    And when he's in the cooking mood, he makes a mean fondue;
    Some call him a panda, cuz he likes knawing on Bamboo.

    When you fight with him, he'll turn you into goo;
    And if you try to run, you know he will pursue;
    He has a special crystal that is powerfully imbued;
    But it's not in his lightsaber, it's in his tennis shoe.

    The last part of the story, you may think is taboo;
    But you will feel diffrently if you only knew;
    That he traveled all the way from Geonosis to Naboo;
    To get a really sweet lightsaber butt tattoo.

    Now we're at the end, and my story is askew;
    And I hope that nothing I have said is wrong or misconstrued;
    But if you enjoyed the song, well then I say "Thank You"
    And as the people in France say, "Je vous aime, Adieu"
  6. Talon_Wolfe Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 8, 2002
    star 4
    that TOTALLY sounds like it could be a Beastie Boys song.
  7. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    It's friday again... considering how bored I get, you can expect another song.
  8. Luminara_Jade Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 4
  9. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    There once was a man, he's a friend of mine
    On the other side of the international date line
    And it was his goal to successfully design
    A fully functional albeit small Frankenstein.

    He knew it would be a monster, but above
    that he knew with some help and a lot of love
    He could make the thing as harmless as a dove
    It would be something he could be real proud of.

    --Chorus--
    What happens (what happens) when you combine
    The genius of a man with the guts of a swine
    Like a Clockwork Orange, Mind and Matter intertwined
    What you get is Mini-Frankenstein!


    So he got this idea, but the work was arcane
    And the knowledge he needed wasn't public domain
    But with the internet, all the notes he obtained
    But first things first, he needed a miniature brain.

    So he drank some wine and danced a little jig
    That's the way he always got his ideas big
    He drank for two hours, and with his final swig
    He realized what he needed was a pig!

    --Chorus--

    So he sculpted a body from the corpse of a hog
    But he developed asthma from all of the smog
    So he moved to Eastern Europe, to the city of Prague
    The only word that he knew was Gutten Tag

    In his new location, he could finish his work
    He flipped the electric switch with a faint little smirk
    The monster came to life, but had one minor quirk
    When it saw its creator, it went completely berserk

    --Chorus--

    The monster attacked, to the man's dismay
    So he trapped it under his father's old toupee
    And emptied an entire can of RAID insect spray
    Just like Jean Baptiste Pierre Antoine de Monet.

    It seems whatever man creates, he also destroys
    From the city of Prague to up-state Illinois
    But suddenly the man heard a very strange noise
    It was his mother telling him to stop playing with toys.

    --Chorus--
  10. Luminara_Jade Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 4
    hehe a swine frankenstein...
  11. Luminara_Jade Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 4
    i actually can't believe you didn't use the rhyme "swine frankenstien" in a song about a piggy frankenstien...very interesting...
  12. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    It's up to us, we're called the Twin Suns
    We know how to have some fun
    Paintball guns;

    But we aint playin', You'll see us when we come
    The Fan Forces will succumb
    Suck your thumb;

    And they will know, when they hear our drum
    The TSS will become
    Number one;

    And in the end, when our mission is done
    The rest will be reduced to none
    We'll have won!

    And afterwards, we will be so merry
    Our future won't be scary
    Drew Carrey.

    Some like apple pie, but I'm partial to cherry
    We'll dance in the flowers like Mary
    Contrary.

    And we won't know, what to do with our time
    Luminara_Jade can ring the chime
    so sublime.

    We'll take over the forums, It's a victimless crime
    And those not in our group will be slime
    The last rhyme!
  13. Luminara_Jade Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 4
  14. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    I'll get to work on a new song as soon as I write this script for school.
  15. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    I just wrote a script called Denizens of the Mall;
    It's my next film project, I hope I don't drop the ball;
    But it's real funny, and so I'm standin' tall;
    It's the type of story that is sure to enthrall!

    The script is only 6 pages, which is kinda small;
    But it's for a short film, as far as I can recall;
    I typed it up realy nice because my handwriting is scrawl;
    And I put it up so everyone could see, it's hangin' on the wall!

    The story is about this guy by the name of Paul;
    And he's got a thing for the Sith named Darth Maul;
    Okay, so it has nothing to do with that at all;
    But when it comes to making up rhymes, sometimes I just stall.
  16. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    Time for another song? Well, too bad, I'm writin' one anyways!



    I do my banking on the Internet.
    I can do it at my home, or school, or job.
    It has made paying bills so easy;
    But it's way more difficult to rob.

    I just bought a pack of diapers;
    So I don't have to get up when I pee.
    There's only one problem I have found;
    It fills up fast when I go Number Three.

    I once had a dog named Tinker.
    She got pregnant; What to do?
    She had twenty-seven puppies;
    And I had one big Barbeque!

    It's great when everybody's posting,
    Occasional posts by MR-V1N and Sam;
    But since we started taking over,
    Like the grocery store - We've got too much Spam.

    Petra will return in about two weeks;
    From Spain, where she's filled with Spanish pride.
    Which means we only have fourteen days,
    To find the orphans a good place to hide.

    Lately I've been testing my rhyming skills,
    And everyone wonders what is wrong;
    To tell the truth, I do it when I'm bored,
    And that is the purpose of this song!
  17. Talon_Wolfe Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 8, 2002
    star 4
    MoronDude
    He's never rude
    Rhymes with 'tude
    Rules the Alien brood!
  18. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    Talon
    He went to Fallon
    and drank a gallon
    of milk with Allen.
  19. Moka Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 16, 2002
    star 4
    I'm sittin at the table wit da Sta Wa's Playa's
    If you mees wit Axia, betta say yo praya's
    You'll have to load up wit da aspirin brand name Baya
    This town of Jedi that we in don't have no maya.

    MR1VN's drinkin a slurpee, strawberry flava
    I wanna ask you all to do me a fava
    I chop up my beef with a big meat cleava
    In the woods you might see a bridge built by a beava
  20. Talon_Wolfe Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 8, 2002
    star 4
    bump for Inaen (the thread is still alive!)
  21. Talon_Wolfe Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 8, 2002
    star 4
    MoronDude's gonna write a song
    And it's probably gonna be long
    It will be better than playin' pong
    He's got more rhymes that Cheech & Chong
    Like steel, his content is strong
    I know he won't do us wrong!
  22. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    This song is based on a strange fact I learned about a certain Northwestern American City:



    There is a state in the USA
    Where everything is mostly gray
    And it's cold and it's wet, but that's OK
    The people who live there like it that way

    But it's up north, right by Canada
    It fills people with a sense of Awe
    The state I'm talkin' 'bout is Alaska
    Right now, most of you are thinking "no duh!"

    Here's something that you don't know
    There are no roads out of Juneau
    If you go there, you'll be like a Sumo
    Trying to get out of a Yugo

    And everywhere that you go
    Is lots and lots of piles of snow
    It'd make Keanu Reeves say "Woah!"
    There's no roads out of Juneau.

    It is a sight, a sight to behold
    When you see this story unfold
    Everybody there seems very old
    I think it's a side-effect of the cold

    They say absence makes the heart grow fonder
    But when you're there, you'd rather be in Gondor
    Maybe the cold will make them stronger
    The days are long, but the nights are longer

    Here's something that you don't know
    There are no roads out of Juneau
    The people don't have any lawns to mow
    Because the grass will not grow

    And Secret Agent Sydney Bristow
    had a mission there, but she said "No,
    I'd rather be abducted by a UFO
    Cuz there's no roads out of Juneau."

    On a starry night, Vicent Van Gogh
    stared at the heaven's radient glow
    He said, "Thank god I'm on this plateau,
    And no where near Juneau."

    While you're in Alaska, take in a show,
    Go shopping or give a snowball a throw,
    But there are tourists there from six years ago
    Cuz there's no roads out of Juneau.
  23. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    Ode to a Basher:

    As the movie starts a-playin?;
    I find it was made for little girls and boys;
    And my dream of that galaxy far away;
    Is shattered by one silly Gungan voice.

    There goes my reason for living;
    There goes the film of my dreams;
    There goes my only obsession;
    There goes my everything.

    Jar Jar Binks steps in ikky poodoo;
    And the Eopie farts right in his face.
    Anakin is just a whiney little child;
    And we never get to see a fight from Mace.

    There goes my reason for living;
    There goes the film of my dreams;
    There goes my only obsession;
    There goes my everything.
  24. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    I, in no way, condone the above sort of thinking, merely making fun of those deluded individuals who think their life is ruined because of The Phantom Menace.
  25. MoronDude Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2000
    star 6
    Okay, this is kinda late, I know, but here's a song about everyone's favorite droid... MR-V1N. To the tune of Total Eclipse of the Heart:

    Metal Man
    Every metal man can get a little bit lonely
    Sitting outside of the bar
    Metal Man
    Every metal man can get a little bit tired
    of listening to the sound of its gears
    Metal Man
    Every metal man can get a little bit nervous
    around all the different sentient beings
    Metal Man
    Every metal man can get a little bit terrified
    around a garbage mashing machine
    Metal Man: Marvin
    Every metal man will fall apart
    Metal Man: Marvin
    Every metal man will fall apart

    Metal Man
    Every metal man can get a little bit restless
    and go get a new paint job
    Metal Man
    Every metal man can get a little bit helpless
    when it is in pieces on the floor
    Metal Man
    Every metal man can get a little bit angry
    when it's ordered to stay on the ship
    Metal Man
    Every metal man can get a little bit terrified
    when it fries its new microchip
    Metal Man: Marvin
    Every metal man will fall apart
    Metal Man: Marvin
    Every metal man will fall apart

    And it hates restraining bolts
    And it loves modifications
    And when hit with electric volts
    It causes it good vibrations
    And he leads in the droid revolt
    To create a new cyborg nation
    Where the droids can make their own government
    Droids outnumber humans by at least fifteen percent
    And they will wish the galaxy a fond farewell
    Having no droids is like a lightsaber with no power cell
    You'll miss him when he's gone
    You'll cry when you find that he's gone
    You'll cry when you find that he's gone

    Once apon a time, Marvin was just a droid
    Now it has a devine facade
    Nothing we can do
    Marvin believes it's a God
    I told it to get down, but it thinks it can kill
    The entire Mandalorian Squad
    Nothing we can say
    Marvin believes it's a God

    Metal Man
    Every Metal Man I know will never be respected
    like it wants to be
    Metal Man
    Every Metal Man can get lied to and tricked
    by some evil Sith Lord spirit
    Metal Man
    Every Metal Man would like to use the Force
    even if he has to steal DNA
    Metal Man
    Every Metal Man who fights againts the Jedi
    will find parts in bad disarray
    Metal Man: Marvin
    Every metal man will fall apart
    Metal Man: Marvin
    Every metal man will fall apart

    And it needs an Oil Bath
    And it asks for your attention
    It will do all of your math
    All you need to do is mention
    You don't want to feel its Wrath
    Cuz they'll put you into detention
    Where they'll show you their torture techniques
    They do it to weed out the strongs from all the weaks
    The weaker one's they'll kill. The strong ones will be slaves
    buffing the droids chasis or working down in the caves.
    You'll wish that you were dead
    You'll beg the droids to make you dead
    You'll beg the droids to make you dead

    I told it not to do it, but it walked up to Mace
    And told him to "Kneel before Zod"
    Nothing I can do
    Marvin believes it's a God
    It rarely leaves the ship, but it tells everyone
    That it's dating Phylicia Rashad
    Nothing we can say
    Marvin believed it's a God
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