SWRPF Archive WOTG II: Clash of the Titans (A RPF Role Play)

"Strippers!" FID cried.
"Shield your eyes," Jello cooed.

Jace handed out beer, and sat down with Jikala.

 

Coruscant

Supreme Hyper Uber Mega Super Dupre Grand Admiral General Emperor Leader Fluke_Groundwalker sat in his 456,623,567,134,000 credit command chair, brooding.

He had tired of his brothel, which contained 745 beautiful women. Standing up, he walked to the window, where he saw his Awesome-class Super Star Destroyer being built. They only had the bride complete, but 5 seconds later, all 3,490,243.03 meters of the command ship were finished. Jumping up into the air, he somehow found himself on the bridge, in command.

"Helm, full speed for Dathomir."

"Sir, that'll take weeks."

"Bah. The hell with it. Let's just slag Coruscant."

Fluke_Groundwalker, obviously power hungry (and maniacal), targeted his home planet, and the capital of the galaxy. "All right, fire the 17,000,000 Death Star superlasers...now!"

The salvo went through the planet, evaporating it immediately. It then bounced off of the Koornacht Cluster, was redirected off of Hoth, and wound up slagging Dathomir.

As usual, another boring day.

 

Nithrak died of heart failure when he saw Zaarin and Jello nude, but Q brought him back to life, but this time as an infidel.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" screamed Nithrak.

Mitth laughed.

Nithrak sprayed himself with acid to cause scarring, then found a phaser and vaporized jello, who popped back into the room through a wormhole.

Bill Cosby entered the room and gave Jello a hug, then started licking him.

"EWWWWWWW" cried everyone.

 

Mitth shoots Bill Cobsy and shoves his corpse into the sarlacc pit along with Nithrak Tewl and Jello. "I finally got to kill Jello!"

 

*avoids Dobski's kinky strip tease*

No. I don't swing that way.

 

Buts clothes back on and jumps into a tree.AD

 

With a click of his fingers, Q magically turns into Toma Tu'kla!

MUAHAHAHAHA!

 

Zaarin stepped forth with his ultimate weapon...his vocal chords. He began to sing 'In the Jungle', and the inhuman screams of it all were horrifying...


SERIOUS POST
((Wow, the first serious one so far ))

The terraforming squad arrived at Firrerre, intent on cleaning up the toxic atmosphere Darth Vader had made so long ago. The droids landed on the lush homeworld of the Firrerreo and began to clean it up.

 

WW stood there on the bridge of Spaceball 1.

" Set course for Coruscant. Prepare for ludicrous speed!!! Have Dinner and silly squadrons following"

 

*jumps up an bites off Mitthy's finger and runs off with the finger and the One Ring*

YEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!

ITTTTSSSSSSSS MINEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

MY OWNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MYY PRECIOUUUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!


*slips and falls down into the fire filled pits*

 

PoT and Boba were already drunk and passed out in the aisle of the church.

LOL!

As soon as I find room, that goes in my sig!

And loved the Aussie skit. You guys have all distilled my essence better then I could of!

IC
The Mystical plane of life and death and all the fish in between.

Grand Poobah Super Duper lengendary leader of the known universe plus 2 monkeys in leather recliners with co-directorship of worldly causes concerning the development of cheese molds, Kane Lavos, was concerned with the spiralling out of controlness of his master plan.
"That fool Jello foils me again!" he cried, as he pounded the table of his X wing fighter, which somehow - despite being normal sized - had a Tardis style 40 by 40 meter bridge within the cockpit, including Tavira, Dugal - who was alive again god bless his soul - and Boba who were trying to perfect the reverse twist Hokey Pokey on orders of the Director.

Wondering at the size of the last sentance, Lavos changed his name to Erios for no reason, and launched his fighter from Bakura to Dathomir, arriving in 1 minute.

"Those fools think their fleets are impressive, they forgot the one great truth of Star Wars...the bigger they are... the bigger they boom!!"

Lining up for all the fleets, PoT fired a single Proton torpedo which was sucked down all the exhaust ports at the same time, destroying everyones fleets.

There was much celebrating, and Lavos sent Boba down to poo on everyone's head as reward.

Realising his life was complete, Lavos happily killed Dugal and Tavira, before hyperspacing to the nearest Space Bar, to get drunk on the celebration of life.....

==============
A week later
Days later, PoT was found drunk and naked, unconcious in the confessional booth of a church...Boba was found rotting in the rafters, after he attempted to 'hold on' for 2 days, and went septic. The smell still remains....
OOC: see you all later lads!

 

Cheerio, PoT!

Mr. Halycron walks up to Mitth, and smites 'im with a...herring!!
"Havatchu!"

 

What is going on? Are we Role Playing again?



How To Survive WOTGIII:

How to Survive War of the Galaxies III

War of the Galaxies II (WOTG II) is a role playing (RP) game thread at www.theforce.net. It is the biggest RP game so far in the RP forums, and although it has seen its downs, and its ups, it is still going strong. WOTG II is a continuation of War of the Galaxies (WOTG). This RP includes the Galactic Empire, Rebel Alliance, Yuuzhan Vong, C.S.A., Morian Raiders, and a few other smaller fractions. Both the Galactic Empire and the Rebel Alliance have lost there great leaders, the Emperor died in one of his force experiments, Darth Vader killed himself after learning of his son?fs death, Luke Skywalker at the Battle of Hoth. At the Battle of Hoth, the Galactic Empire had a major victory, killing the important Rebel leaders. Now, both the Rebel Alliance and the Galactic Empire are healing their wounds, the Yuuzhan Vong have invaded the galaxy, on a conquest of taking over the whole galaxy. At first, there was a three-fraction war, Galactic Empire vs. Rebel Alliance, and the Yuuzhan Vong against all three. But now, a treaty has taken place, and the Galactic Empire and the Rebel Alliance are now putting there differences aside, for the better good of the galaxy. This treaty starts WOTGII.
In WOTGII, the Yuuzhan Vong are outnumbered, and our fighting two fronts of a war, but there is no sign of defeat for the Yuuzhan Vong. Yuuzhan Vong agents have attempted, and have assigned a key member of the Imperial army, now the Yuuzhan Vong have agents every where, and an attempt to kill Fleet Admiral Bravo (me), has been spoiled, but a second attempt has been made, and nearly was successful. Now, the President of the Rebel Alliance has tortured an Imperial General, which threatens to tear the treaty apart, and ignite the flame in the age old Galactic Civil War.
Currently, WOTGII, is on pause, do to a break done in command, hot heads, emotions, and other key events. The Galactic Empire attacked the Rebel Alliance at the trial, but luckily, the leader of the Galactic Empire, Grand Admiral Jello (GAJ), did not authorize the attack, and as of now, new rules, Game Masters (GM), and a new story line is being made, to create War of the Galaxies III (WOTGIII). But, this essay will brace you for WOTGIII, and teach you how to survive WOTGIII?c

War of the Galaxies II?cthe place where villain, backstabbing, and secret alliances are at there high, where money, promises of vast space, planets, and systems, lore all to do what might not be right. War of the Galaxies II (WOTG II), where the law is just a myth, and out laws have hey days. War of the Galaxies II?cthe place you don?ft want to visit?cand now, you must brace yourself for War of the Galaxies III?c
Intelligence is the most important survival tool you will need to survive and win even a small battle, and battles involving whole fleets of ships! Intelligence will decide the fate of a battle, or the war, it will decide weather you live, or die, it will decide your future. Intelligence is the first step in the process of preparing for a battle, or a war, or a strike mission behind enemy line. Intelligence should always have as much information as its agents can get?cthe Yuuzhan Vong use Intelligence agents all the time, and Mr. Green, the former Captain Green of the Rebel Alliance, is the latest of these Yuuzhan Vong Intelligence agents. What do you need for Intelligence? What Intelligence can you trust? How do you know it?fs not a trap? These answers will be better answered when we reach the command process. But for now, let me tell you what Intelligence you need. Good Intelligence agents will hide out for weeks, months, even years for solid information, this is what you need. You need an Intelligence agent that you trust, that can go behind enemy lines for a long period of time, and with out being caught, he or she has to be able to send vital information back to you, about the enemy, enemy movements, and enemy plans. Next, you nee

 

Dathomir

In the pre dawn light of the Dathomir morning, Nithrak peered through the dense fog. It was so thick that when he looked to his left, Yun-Yuuzhan's form was faded to vision, though he was only meters awa.

The two stood at the edge of a giant cliff, where a settlement of female humans had once existed.

"They are getting restless" said Yun.

"Yes" replied Nithrak "patience is not the virtue of a warrior. The call for battle is too strong."

The rest of his commanders approached in the darkness, and together they peered into the fogbank below them.

As dawn crested they heard a faint cry, and soon it grew in intensity, echoing across the planet.

"WotGIII, WotGIII, WotGIII"

As the fog was burnt off by the bright Dathomir sun, Nithrak smiled at the scene before him. Far below, stretching from the base of the cliff as far as the eye could see, was a moving, gyrating mass. It was comprised of Yuuzhan Vong warriors on foot and atop Rancors, and mindless thrall and chazrach, all bloodthirsty.

Nithrak turned to face his commanders.

"Soon, we will squash the infidels. Prepare yourselves."

OOC: LET'S GO!!!!!

 

OOC: Are we Role Rlaying again? I thought we were waiting another week?

 

Bravo,their just having fun.Nothing serious really.

 

OOC: Thanks. That is what I thought.

 

Nithrak, I destroyed Dathomir when I used my Awesome-class Super Star Destroyer. A bank shot off of Koornacht, then Hoth.

Planets Destroyed:

Coruscant
Koornacht
Hoth
Dathomir

IC:

Yesterday was such a boring day, thought Supreme Hyper Uber Mega Super Duper Grand Admiral General Emperor Leader Fluke Groundwalker.

Today, he decided, he would dance around on the bridge, wearing an "I Yuzzies" shirt, and see what type of reaction he would get.

I wonder if the Yuzzies like tea...

 

OOC: Omg, I came into page 82 without reading 80 or 81 first, so I thought we were RPing again! Then I read the other two pages and thought, "Damn!"

 

With his cosmic-universal-godly-super-de-dooper-oh-so-awesome-supercalafragilisticexpialadocious-powers, he brings back all the destroyed planets.

 

Death

Kieran walked around death, still holding the ONE RING and Mitthy's finger. He was just about to go have a chat with the Dread Pirate Roberts when he saw Coruscant Koornacht Hoth and Dathomir speeding from death to life, summoned by Mitth.

Thinking life would be more fun than death, he stuck out a hand and caught hold of Dathomir as it was brought back to life.

 

WW calls upon the reality gods, who smite the superawsome station that GAJ created. Suddenly, all the forces in the known galaxy begin to pull on the station, turning it inside out. Just before he was zapped into nothingness, we catch a glimpse of GAJ in his shower...singing to a rubber duckey.