Before Xanatos: Detached - JA, AU - COMPLETE - - - Thanks for the Nom!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by ardavenport, Feb 20, 2009.

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  1. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4
    Title: Xanatos: Detached
    Author: ardavenport
    Timeframe: pre-Episode I, pre-TPM, JA, AU
    Genre: drama, some angst, action
    Characters: Qui-Gon Jinn, Xanatos, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Bruck Chun, other Jedi
    Keywords Qui-Gon Jinn, Xanatos, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Bruck Chun, Jedi Apprentice
    Summary: Qui-Gon leads his former Padawan, Xanatos to his next step on his journey as a Jedi Knight. A Jedi Temple drama.
    Notes: Typo is my middle name, with missing words and errors that spell checkers don?t catch being my speciality ? if you see any, just post a reply or send a PM with the what and where and I will kill them with no mercy.
    Disclaimer: All characters belong to George and Lucasfilm; I?m just playing in their sandbox



    "Ready for another round?" Bruck asked.

    Obi-Wan looked at the empty corridor. Yoda was gone. No one would see if he gave Bruck the beating he deserved. Bruck was often cruel, but usually not so brazen. He was deliberately provoking Obi-Wan, trying to get him to lose his temper.

    But why? Obi-Wan wondered.

    Of course! "You knew all along that Qui-Gon was coming to search for a Padawan, didn't you," Obi-Wan said slowly as the suspicion hardened into certainty. Since Obi-Wan was the oldest apprentice in the Temple, the Jedi Masters would encourage Qui-Gon to take him - the lost cause. Bruck would not want that to happen.

    Bruck laughed. "I made sure you didn't find out. If I'd had my way, you wouldn't have found out until he'd left."

    Two cloaked figures watched the confrontation between the two boys from a shadowed alcove of the training room. They both saw the play of expressions on Obi-Wan Kenobi's face, so readable, even without the Force. Surprise, hurt, determination, contempt for Bruck Chun and finally a false casualness that disguised none of the fear that both watchers sensed.

    Obi-Wan smiled. "Bruck, three months from now, when you turn thirteen, I hope you'll make a great farmer."

    Bruck leaped with a snarl, lightsaber held high. Obi-Wan spun to meet him with a cry on his lips. Flashing blades clashed in a burst of light and buzzing sound as the boys met in the room's center.

    The shorter of the two watchers shook his head, concealed under the hood of dusty brown Jedi robe.

    "That was. . . .really pathetic," he commented, his voice low, though it was doubtful that the two furiously fighting boys would hear either of them.

    "Which one?" his taller companion asked.

    "Both," he answered. "Kenobi is the most pretentious little wannabe Jedi I've ever seen. And Chun thinks that power comes from taking it from sad cases like Kenobi. I at least had a lot more style and forethought when I did it. Younger than he is, too."

    The other person shrugged his shoulders. "Chun is mere a bully. But Kenobi has real strength underneath all that insecurity." The hooded face looked toward the brawling, angry boys in the training area. They pounded each other with sweaty grunts and inarticulate fury. The Force draining away from their unfocused rage, they were both tiring quickly.

    "Oh, no," the smaller watcher said.

    The taller figure tore his eyes away from the fight.

    "You're going to take Kenobi, aren't you?"

    "I haven't said anything," the tall one denied.

    "You don't have to," the shorter one accused. "You've got that look on your face, like when you put your arm around a slobbering vagrant and give her my robe to keep warm."

    "I only did that once. And that was years ago."

    "It took years for me to get the smell out," the shorter one complained before turning back to the fight. The boys were stumbling with exhaustion, striking with single, poorly aimed blows, driven by anger and little else. "So, this is my successor? If he really means to go after Chun, then he could turn that saber up. Take off a few limbs maybe. But I don't think he's even though of that."

    "No." The bearded face under the hood smiled. "There is no real darkness in his fear and anger. Just impetuousness."

    "Aaaaaah, that is your speciality," the shorter figure agree
  2. Valairy Scot Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    'Agri-Corps' Xanatos mouthed.

    "So that boy, right now, thinks he's a cast off, a failure of the Jedi Order."

    "Agri-Corps is a perfectly noble calling - - -"

    "Agri-Corps isn't a calling. It's the dumping ground of the Jedi Order for its castoffs. Only Master Yoda believes any of the party line about the nobility of planting and growing. If the Order meant what they said about Agri-Corps it would be training their younglings to be farmers. But they only train them to be Knights. And they only break the bad news to the ones who don't meet their standards when it's too late for them to be anything else," Xanatos snarled.


    "And you let them give him an assignment to Agri-Corps?" he finished, glaring. "I don't ever remember you being so cruel."

    "Perhaps I learned it from you," Qui-Gon replied humorlessly.

    The expression drained from Xanatos's pale face, a slight breeze ruffling the bangs of his black hair, the rest of it tied back at the base of his neck.

    "Perhaps you did," he acknowledged. "So, you plan to crush his spirit with an assignment to Agri-Corps and then at the appropriately dramatic moment rescue him from his doom and bring him back into the Jedi fold. Thus guaranteeing his fervent loyalty toward you, his savior."

    "I am not toying with him," Qui-Gon said, still serious. "But his desire to be a Jedi is such a consuming ambition in him that I do not think he will truly know what it is unless he knows how to let it go."

    "Oh, the old Jedi penance of no attachments." Xanatos moaned sarcastically. "Now, even wanting to be a Jedi is too much of an attachment. We must all be so detached." He sighed and resumed walking toward the ship with Qui-Gon.


    Ah, if there wasn't one of YOUR stories, I'd say Xan is 100% correct about Qui's motives, but from Qui's viewpoint - well, he has a point.
    Interesting to see how this plays out.
  3. Jinngerbread Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 2, 2007
    star 4
    Oh fascinating!

    What an interesting beginning you've set up already here. Xan as a Jedi and taking Bruck Chun and Qui-Gon willingly letting Obi-Wan go to the agricorps when he knows he's going to take him?

    Will be curious to see how this plays out!

    I'd like to be on your PM list if you're planning on keeping one.
  4. jacen200015 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 11, 2002
    star 4
    A very interesting beginning you have here.
  5. Seremela Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 12, 2008
    star 3
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] Oh, Xanatos is GREAT!!! I love his sarcasm, from his first comment ("That was. . . .really pathetic,") to his tirade about Agricorps and attachments! I thought about putting some of my favorite lines of his in this post, but I realized I liked them all, so I gave up on that notion :p

    Very interesting story. Xanatos and Bruck, and Qui-Gon's unorthodox training start with Obi-Wan (now why doesn't that surprise me of him? [face_whistling]) Since I don't want to miss the next part, PLEASE, PLEASE can I be put on your pm list?



  6. XANl Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 1, 2006
    star 1
    Poor Obi Wan,[face_thinking] this is the experience that will scare him with insecurity forever.
    Xanatos is short, I guarantee that in Xani mind he is very tall[face_batting]

    Can't wait to see what happens next!
  7. p_stotts Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 21, 2001
    star 4
    Well now, this certainly is a new take on things. I can't wait to see where you go with this. Great start! If you have a PM list, please add me to it.
  8. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4
    This is very interesting, I sense that Xanatos is a kinder person that Qui-Gon.:p
    He has some concerns about what Jinn is doing to Obi-Wan.[face_shame_on_you]
    I like Xanatos.[face_love] It is going to be a very exciting read.
    What is Xanatos sneaking on board Qui-Gons ship for.[face_thinking]

    =D= great start.
  9. ratna Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2007
    star 4
    omg

    xan according to anne

    this is going to be good!!!
  10. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4

    Valairy_Scot: Well, it is not a nice thing for Qui-Gon to make Obi-Wan think he was going to Agri-Corps, so Xan has some reason for being upset. Thanks for reading!

    Jinngerbread: I was wondering what Xanatos would be like as a Knight and how he might have gotten there; this is just my speculation on that. Thanks for the reply!

    jacen200015: Thank-you! :)

    Seremela: Thanks! Xanatos is a bit cynical in the books and I don't think that's because he had gone to the dark side, so he would likely be that way as a Knight. Though a LOT of inspiration for his sarcasm come from the Xanatos portrayals of Princess_Arulmozhi on there boards, too.

    XANl: Obi-Wan will go through a lot, but Xanatos has Bruck as his target. Thanks for the reply!

    p_stotts: Thanks! Added to list.

    Gkilkenny: Thank-you! Well, Xanatos is mostly sympathetic to Obi-Wan because he is less sympathetic to the Jedi and Agri-Corps. But most of his energy will be spent on Bruck.

    ratna: Thank-you!


  11. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4
    - ooOo%oOOo%oOOOOo%oOOo%oOoo - - - - Part 2



    Alone in a small training room, unaware that he was being watched, Bruck Chun fiercely swung his green lightsaber blade in a controlled exercise.

    Slash. Step. Spin. Step. Step. Jab. Slash up. Reverse Down. Spin. Slash - - -

    His blade collided, locking solidly with a blue lightsaber with a jolt that he felt through his elbows all the way up in his shoulders.

    Bruck hastily disengaged, shutting off his saber and jumping back, his pale blue eyes staring at the equally pale blue eyes of the Jedi Knight who had suddenly appeared.

    "You've got enough power," the Knight said, twirling his saber casually before extinguishing the blade. "And you're fast enough. But your motions are almost mechanical. A routine like that will never teach you anything if you just memorize it."

    The Knight clipped his lightsaber to his belt. He was tall, but not much more than a head taller than Bruck, who was large for his age. The Knight's skin was as pale as Bruck's, made more striking by his black hair, loose and untidy around his face with the rest of it tied back behind him. He wore a dusty brown robe over plain, dusty brown tunic and pants as well as the usual Jedi belt and tall boots.

    Bruck eyed him warily, not liking the criticism. But this newcomer was a Jedi Knight.

    And Bruck Chun was an Initiate in need of a Master.

    Bruck bowed his pale head.

    "I would be honored if you would instruct me," he said. "Master. . . .?"

    "Xanatos. Xanatos Son-of-Crion."

    Bruck stared back. He had heard the name. At least the Xanatos part of it.

    As was common in the Republic, Bruck's home world, Telos, had gone for many generations without yielding a single Jedi candidate, but within the span of one generation, it had produced two. Bruck was one. Xanatos was the other.

    As a youngling, he had been only vaguely aware of there being another Telosian Human Jedi, a Padawan over ten years his age, through the annual missives he received from his father. Though attachments were forbidden to Jedi, familial contacts were not. Only discouraged. Bruck hung on to this connection, the unswerving pride from his parents and the admiration of a little brother who looked so much like him.

    The messages he annually exchanged with his distant family were his private strength to him, not an attachment. But the communications had almost ended more than three years ago when the planetary government of Telos had nearly succumbed to a coup. His father had been wrongly accused of complicity and corruption and only Bruck's position with the Jedi had gained sympathy and leniency for his family. Because a Jedi had struck down the would-be dictator.

    Xanatos.

    "You killed Crion," Bruck blurted out.

    "Yes." Xanatos admitted, unconcerned. "And you know what the Jedi Council did for killing my own father?" He learned close, nose-to-nose with Bruck. "They knighted me. The perverts."

    Bruck pulled back, suddenly very nervous about the glint he saw in Xanatos's pale blue eyes and not sure if he believed what he was hearing.

    Crion, the dictator, was Xanatos's father?

    Why wouldn't his own father have said anything about it? Had that been covered up? Or was Xanatos lying? Was he unstable? But why would he be knighted if he were? He looked suspiciously at the man before him, his plain brown Jedi clothes. And the lightsaber attached to his belt.

    "I have to be going now." Bruck backed away.

    "But you just begged for my instruction?" Xanatos noted, his tone rising, mocking.

    Bruck only paused. "I don't have time," he mumbled. But Xanatos danced around him. Fast. Blocking his path.

    "But I do," he finished.

    Bruck grimaced. He knew when he was being played with. And this was not a game he could win.

    "I don't need anything from you," Bruck snarled, pushing past him, speaking far more brusquely to a Knight than he otherwise might have. He just wanted to get away.

    Xanatos let him pass. But outside in the hall, anger stirred in Bruck when he heard Xanatos laugh.



    - ooOo%oOOo%oOOOOo%oO
  12. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4
    Well of course he left the order.:oops: Why wouldn't he after being stuck with Qui-Gon who let him think he wasn't wanted.o_O
    I wonder what Xanatos will make of that bit of information and how come a lowly initiate can hear the news before sneaky Xanatos.[face_thinking]

    Nice update.=D=
  13. jacen200015 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 11, 2002
    star 4
    Gossip is gossip, not always the whole truth. Did Melida/Daan happen? Is Xanatos going to have words with Qui-Gon? This little incident is not helping Xanatos any...or will it?
  14. p_stotts Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 21, 2001
    star 4
    Kenobi leaving the Jedi. He was a lot smarter than he looked.

    A typically irreverent Xanatos reaction. I wonder if he'll seek Qui-Gon out and get the facts. Hmm... although, why would Qui-Gon allow Obi-Wan to leave? I mean, Xanatos didn't turn on him, so he can't be wallowing in self-pity. Perhaps Qui-Gon is simply giving the boy time to realize his mistake on his own.

    On another note, Bruck has as much of a problem with self-esteem as Obi-Wan. He notices Xanatos is always observing him and the first conclusion he draws from that is that Xan is warning other masters away from him as a form of punishment. Why wouldn't it occur to him that Xanatos is considering taking Bruck as his apprentice?

    Great post! I look forward to reading more.
  15. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    This is really different and intriguing. I liked how Qui-Gon was using the AgriCorps to instruct Obi-Wan about letting go. That's a different take on things but actually makes sense in a cruel way. I liked that Bruck stood up to Xan.

    Well done!
  16. Seremela Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 12, 2008
    star 3
    :D Oh, Xanatos is evil! I didn't get the impression that Qui-Gon enjoyed the Agricorps lesson he was giving Obi-Wan, just found it necessary, but I do get the impression that Xanatos enjoys letting Bruck squirm. He's certainly very good at it [face_laugh]

    And he's been doing it for a while now, since Melida/Daan has just happened. :( Poor Qui-Gon...

    I wonder how he will handle it, because this time he doesn't have a previous experience of having a Padawan betray and leave him, (although I don't really think betrayal is the right word for Obi-Wan's leaving on Melida/Daan; and I loved the twist that Xanatos himself killed his father! And was knighted for it by the perverts of the Council [face_devil])

    So now I'm very curious as to how things go between Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan in this take, and even more so if Xanatos' approach is going to work on Bruck :eek:

    Great part!


  17. Valairy Scot Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Aw, Melida/Daan from the perspective of others not really tied to the event. Intriging.

    Xan wants to wear Bruck down, I think, but this time he has been the one surprised.
  18. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Just found this. I like it! =D=


    Please put me on the PM list. Thanks! :D
  19. XANl Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 1, 2006
    star 1
    The only thing that will rectify, the force, is if that Xanatos

    to be obi wan's Master and Bruck go untrained. Qui Gon Jinn become one of the council
    and helps
    Obi Wan become a great Jedi.

    :-B This is my IMHO
  20. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4

    Gkilkenny: Thanks! Yes, Obi-Wan does have his limits and Qui-Gon can over-estimate them. But for Xanatos. . . . he's a bit burned out on schemes for now, so he wouldn't be looking for the information.

    jacen200015: Aaaah, more will be revealed in the next post. [face_mischief] Thanks for the reply!

    p_stotts: Thank-you! Ooooh, I think Xanatos will talk to Qui-Gon about Obi-Wan. [face_mischief] And I think that Bruck is just a little too slow and hard headed to look past the things he doesn't like about Xanatos to figure out what he's really up to.

    dianethx: Thank-you! Letting go was a big part of what Obi-Wan learned in the JA books. Qui-Gon didn't intend for Obi-Wan to learn things that way, but that's how it worked out. I just wonder how it would go if it was intentional.

    Seremela: Xanatos is definitely not nice. He pretty much has Bruck cornered. Thanks for reading!

    Valairy_Scot: Yeah, Xanatos is going to wear Bruck's ego down a bit. [face_mischief] Thanks for reading!

    VaderLVR64: Thank-you! Added to list.

    XANl: Mmmmmm, I don't think that Qui-Gon is ready to join the Council. Thanks for reading!


  21. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4

    - ooOo%oOOo%oOOOOo%oOOo%oOoo - - - - Part 3



    Much later, Xanatos found Qui-Gon Jinn sulking in his room. After confirming the details of Bruck's story. He had sensed only triumphant truthfulness from the boy, but he was not going to go into the Den of Jinn without arming himself with the facts first.

    Kenobi had left the Order to side with a faction of a civil war on Melida-Daan. A faction of idealistic younglings, mostly Kenobi's age. They had originally been sent to rescue an injured Knight who was trying to negotiate an end to the war. While there, Kenobi had become entangled in the planetary passions while Jinn stuck to the mission. They had split when Kenobi wanted to use their ship to help the Young, the faction he sided with, while Jinn wanted to take Tahl, the Knight who had so badly failed her mission of peace, back to the Temple. According to Tahl, the final confrontation had almost led to a fight before Kenobi stopped it and handed in his lightsaber instead.

    Tahl was a former clan mate of Qui-Gon and Xanatos had met her a few times. They were only passing acquaintances, but she accepted his visitation in the med-center though she was grievously maimed and probably permanently blinded. Even so, she selflessly only expressed concern for Qui-Gon's hurt.

    Xanatos supposed that the dramatically selfless Qui-Gon and Tahl deserved each other, but at the moment there was a bigger mess to deal with.

    He did not touch the door chime. He just walked in to find Qui-Gon sitting on a floor cushion in the gloom, his back to the door.

    "So, I hear you really lost one this time."

    Silence.

    "Taught him too much detachment? So, he detached himself?"

    Silence.

    Xanatos could feel Qui-Gon Jinn's mind churning through the Force. His old Master was trying to meditate his way through his turmoil. Xanatos knew that if he were sensible, he should just leave him to it.

    If he were sensible.

    He kept firing acidic remarks at Qui-Gon who kept ignoring him. Until. . . .

    "Miscalculated on how much cruelty he could stand perhaps?"

    "Yes," Qui-Gon answered, unmoving. "I should have consulted you first, since you are far more expert at it."

    And Xanatos realized that his old Master had not been ignoring him at all. He had just been waiting for a good opening.

    "How goes your own project?" Qui-Gon asked, still facing the bare wall of his room.

    Xanatos lowered his head. "I've been going too easy on him. I haven't been nearly cruel enough. He thinks I'm conspiring with Kenobi and you to keep him from being chosen. Presumably as revenge for his bullying ways, though he wouldn't call it that."

    Qui-Gon turned his head, one shadowed eye catching Xanatos's.

    "Does he really think he's that important?"

    "His attitude comes as much from the immaturity of his age as it does from his vanity."

    The older man looked away again.

    "It is past time for him to grow up."

    "I'm glad you think so. This time."

    Qui-Gon did not answer that.

    "Are you going to leave Kenobi? On that planet? In the middle of a war?"

    "I must," Qui-Gon answered, the emotion leaking out on the second word.

    "And if he calls for help?"

    He turned to peer at him again.

    "Then I'll go."

    "Make him a Jedi?"

    "Why do you care?"

    Xanatos's jaw clinched before he answered.

    "Because you do."

    He turned and left Qui-Gon's room, his robe whipping past the door frame as he passed.



    - ooOo%oOOo%oOOOOo%oOOo%oOoo -



    After a few days, Qui-Gon Jinn emerged from his solitude, having bled out most of his upset in the usual meditative Jedi way. Xanatos next saw him with a couple of other Knights observing the Initiates practice. In deference to Bruck's request, he said nothing to his fellow Knights. But that was easy. He was not observing the action with them.

    Xanatos and Master Craglar were assisting the instructors with the training. They took turns sparring with each Initiate while the instructors pointed out differences in style and form. Chun looked smug when he got Craglar for his turn, as if he had denied Xanatos some petty victory. But h
  22. Valairy Scot Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5

    Well, I suppose you need time to think about it. It's a big decision. But while you keep getting older, Bruck, just remember. . . . this might be the best offer you get," he warned.

    Xanatos nodded an abbreviated bow, turned and left. Craglar, who had waited by the door, joined him.

    "Is that the one you wanted to take on as an apprentice?" the old Master asked gruffly, jabbing a thumb toward where Bruck still stood, alone now in the training arena.

    "Yes. That's him."

    Craglar puckered his mouth, his long whiskers rising and falling, and shook his head. "I don't know what you see in him."

    Xanatos took one last look at him.

    "Me."



    :D Great line to end that section! I can't wait to see Xan and Bruck working together (nah, I didn't really say that, did I? Me, the Obi fan?).
  23. nada_smith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2006
    star 1
    Another original and intriguing story from you! You, know, you can tell Xanatos that I think he is a hero...proper sanitation has saved many lives. :) Somehow, I don't think he'll care about my opinion, though. ;)

    Den of Jinn [face_laugh]

    So what will Xanatos and Jinn do now that they've reached that fork in the "road"?

    I'm hooked!
  24. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4
    Bruck certainly needs putting in his place.[face_beatup]
    Qui-Gon is still the ever cheerful sadsack.:p
    =D=
  25. p_stotts Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 21, 2001
    star 4
    Xanatos has really got Bruck between a rock and a hard place. Hmmm... cleaning up other people's waste or tending plants and digging in dirt. Tough choice for someone whose arrogance is their downfall. At least if he chooses Xanatos, he'll eventually become a knight. Perhaps he's too insecure to realize that tiny difference. Being with Xanatos will teach him to be humble and realize his mistakes -- or one would hope so. Great chapter, Ann. I enjoy your stories very much.
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