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Indi, IN Yoda Auditions.

Discussion in 'Mid West Regional Discussion' started by djtom, Nov 6, 2002.

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  1. djtom

    djtom Jedi Youngling star 2

    Jun 18, 2001
    I saw this on a website,, and thought I would post it here.

    Its pretty entertaining, and will at the very least, kill a few minutes. :D

    Yoda Auditions
    Auditioned for many movie roles Yoda has. But only very few gotten he has. Screw up the lines he does. Below appear examples do. What roles try out for did he?

    1. "Orders we follow, son. Orders we follow, or die people do. Simple it is. Clear, are we?"

    2. "Smart Jedi I am not, but know what love is I do."

    3. "Alive five is! Alive five is!"

    4. "Of all the cantinas in all the towns in all the Dagobah system, walk into mine she does."

    5. "Safe is it? Safe is it? Safe is it? Safe is it? Safe is it? Safe is it? Safe is it? Better care of your teeth you should take. Bad cavity have you there."

    6. "Back I will be."

    7. "Number three: never, never, never say you, 'Right back I will be.' Because be back you won't."

    8. "Doing here what are you? Out in a land speeder you should be, bird-dogging droids and ****ing womprat."

    9. "Funny how am I? Clown am I like? Amuse you I do? Make you laugh I do?"

    10. "What you're thinking I know. Fire five or six shots did he? The truth do I tell, lost track I have. But an IG-88 this is, the most powerful laser weapon in Dagobah it is, your head clean off it would take. Ask yourself you must, 'Feel lucky do I?' Well, feel lucky do you, wookie?"

    11. "An animal I am not."

    12. "Hah-hoo!"

    13. "Man of karate I am. Bruise on the inside karate men do."

    14. "Catch us they won't. On a mission from the Emperor we are."

    15. "Sell not yourself short, Jawa, a tremendous slouch you are."

    16. "Reason to kill nobody, reckon I have not, mm hmm."

    17. "The greatest trick did Darth Vader pull, the world he convinced that exist he did not."

    18. "Grow old we won't and die we won't never."

    19. "Call that a light saber you do? A light saber be that not.... A light saber THIS is!"

    20. "Be telling me not about foot massages, the Jedi-****ing-master I am!"

    Scroll down for answers...


    1. Colonel Nathan R. Jessup (Jack Nicholson in "A Few Good Men")

    2. Forrest Gump (Tom Hanks in "Forrest Gump")

    3. Number 5 (The robot in "Short Circuit")

    4. Rick Blaine (Humphrey Bogart in "Casablanca")

    5. Szell (Laurence Olivier in "Marathon Man")

    6. The Terminator (Arnie in "Terminator")

    7. Randy Meeks, the movie geek (Jamie Kennedy in "Scream")

    8. Randle Patrick McMurphy (Jack Nicholson in "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest")

    9. Tommy DeVito (Joe Pesci in "Goodfellas")

    10. Harry Callahan (Clint Eastwood in "Dirty Harry")

    11. John Merrick (John Hurt in "The Elephant Man")

    12. Lieutenant Colonel Frank Slade (Al Pacino in "Scent of a Woman")

    13. Billy Ray Valentine (Eddie Murphy in "Trading Places")

    14. Elwood Blues (Dan Aykroyd in "The Blues Brothers")

    15. Ty Webb (Chevy Chase in "Caddyshack")

    16. Karl Childers (Billy Bob Thornton in "Sling Blade")

    17. Roger "Verbal" Kint (Kevin Spacey in "The Usual Suspects")

    18. Ben Luckett (Wilford Brimley in "Cocoon")

    19. Crocodile Dundee (Paul Hogan in "Crocodile Dundee")

    20. Jules Winnfield (Samuel L. Jackson in "Pulp Fiction")
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