So CO Yoda's Advice Column

[yoda]
Ah, confused by the "Long, long ago..." thing you are. Subspace time warp communications. Confusing they are to the technologically illiterate. No. Happening now the Clone Wars are. Going poorly they are.
[/yoda]

 

Since we are in the "future" we could tell you all about it and help direct your forces to an ultimate victory.But if we do that it would change the timeline and we might lose some of our best chars.


forget it. you are on your own green bean.
temporal prime directive now applies

 

Yeah, isn't Yoda wise enough to handle this on his own?

 

watch a new hope, did not do such a hot job at winning did he.

 

He wasn't even in New Hope! Looks like they did fine without him! But seriously, Yoda is one of my favorite characters.

 

What i meant was If yoda could handle the war good why was the empire in control and he in hiding?

 

[yoda]
Ah. The obvious blinds the simple mind. Hiding, was I not. Waiting, I was. Balance to the Force, Vader's offspring would bring. One must not question the ways of the Force. Allow it to guide you, you must.
[/yoda]

 

Why didn't you just deal with the problem then instead of waiting? Then everyone could live happily ever after.

 

So Yoda, what's your advice on studying other than study hard.

 

[yoda]
Meditate. A quiet room, a peaceful place. This you need to study well. Ponder. Dwell. Only with time will your study reap results.
[/yoda]

 

Good idea! Now do I have to chant when I meditate? Ummmmmmmm.....

 

Master Yoda, if I may, how can I find a way to make my own jedi uniform?

 

[yoda]
RMFF. Much costuming they do. Costuming forum as well. Reliable advice, find there you will.
[/yoda]

 

*steals the little plastic thingy out of the eight ball*

jeez

 

So Yoda, how do you get over colds?

 

[yoda]
Eight-ball, Yoda need not.
Immune to human diseases am I. How think, you, I live to such an old age?
Sense in you a germ, I do. Nyquil for rest I do recommend. Rest you need to heal. Medicate on this you should.
[/yoda]

 

Then how did you get sick and die in the third movie? Opps. Since you live in the past I just spoiled that for you! Sorry Yoda! Well, it looks like I'll be able to rest over the weekend. People have been telling me it takes two weeks to get over it!

 

[yoda]
Sick I will not be. Old. Tired. Completed my Journey. Trained the one who will rebuild the Jedi order I will have. Lived well, I will have. Enough it will be.
Soon, well you will be.
[/yoda]

 

Ahhhh. Sorry I spoiled your future. Since you're still in the clone war, you still have a while to go!

 

yoda, why will my computer not remember my name and password on this website for very long?

 

[yoda]
Hmmm... Yes, symptom you mention, noticed I have. Yoda's scribe suffers with you. Odd, and new behavior this is. Much trouble this site has had of late. Turbulence in the waters of TFN there is. Perhaps related this problem is. Notice will you that this board's RMFF link, gone missing it has. Strange indeed. Meditate on this I will.
[/yoda]

 

IT translation "We'll get back to you on that."

 

Or, try again later.

 

thank you much yoda

 

Yoda, who came up with pop up adds anyways, and why do they always seem to appear? Being at a puplic computer, I can't get rid of them. A curse to the inventor I say!