JCC You Know When you get a Random Text...

You ignore it, or reply they've got a wrong number.

Well, I decided not to. This Is a few years ago, not that that matters...

Message Received: Waz up

(If I get a random, I usually ignore, but there was something about the complete disregard for the english language that made me reply.)

Me: Nada. Sup wit ya?

Them: U no who dis is?

Me: Naw dawg

Them: Is dis hanna

Me: Dis her sistas.

Them: Ok lol what's her number?

Me: You want me to give my sisters number to a complete stranger? How do I know you aren't a pervert?

Them: Trust me im not a pevert

Me: Well you would say that. Your type always do.

Them: Well atlest tell her it's jeremy (Name witheld) if i were would i tell you my full name

Me: Give me your address. I want to make sure you aren't on the sex offenders registry.

Them: (Address sent, but witheld)

Me: I have to pay to look at the registry. Can you PayPal me $300?

Them: No im broke

Me: Jez, maybe you should get a job instead of wasting the day texting.

Them: Im only 12 wtf

Me: I was sweeping chimneys when I was ten. Grateful for the work, I might add.

Them: Can u just tell her to Txt me she has my number.

Me: She said she has never heard of you.

Them: Ok what ever bye

Me: Farewell, Jez.

 

cool story bruh

 

I didn't actually tell a story. And I don't think I'm your bruh. I'm a human, not a breast holder. Well I am at times, but not your ones. And not to be be worn under shirts. I'd be quite lumpy. Because I'm a human.

 

What's he doing now, Digbert? And why did you not ask for Yen or RMB or something?

Also top marks for working in a reference to the 1986 Woody Allen classic.

 

If there's no mysterious pineapple involved I don't care.

 

Someone sent me a text about how they've been going to rehab, and I replied "You have the wrong number, but congratulations regardless" and they responded again "Thanks joe,nice to hear from you" and all that and more about rehab, and I had to explain to them again that it was the wrong number. I contemplated just going with it though.

 

This past summer, I got a random text saying "U up?" When I asked who it was, she replied "You're. Sister" (sic). I didn't respond after that, since it wasn't my sister's number, nor her grammatical style.

A few weeks later, that same number texted me "Hows ur arm treatn ya? Can u or Brandy make bracelets for the store? I cld make u some monies. " I was so tempted to pretend to be whoever she was texting and agree to make the bracelets.

 

Best story EVAA!

 

I used to get a bunch of texts from someone (or multiple people, can't recall) looking for someone named Alisha. It happened maybe once every two weeks or so. One day, instead of replying with the standard "wrong number," I decided to go ahead and amuse myself. Basically, I asked who the texter was, he replied with a name, conversation continued with the texter trying to meet up, and it ended when I said that I'm actually Alisha's husband and I wasn't too thrilled with my wife dating him while she was pregnant with our child.

Probably screwed up this Alisha's dating life, but she should probably date people that could correctly recall her phone number.

edit:

For some reason, I never received a single text message from someone looking for Alisha after this.

 

i don't think she ever wanted to date him. that's why he had the wrong number

 

i thought this thread was about random drug tests. I wanted to drop off my specimen.

 

Resize that!

 

This image reminds of the time I had to get my daughter to pee in a cup at the pediatrician's office. So terrible. At least we guys could aim our pee.

 

That's just.. great. Thank... thank you for that.

 

When my phone number first changed, I would get texts asking for somebody named "Atlas." (Don't ask me why anybody would name their child Atlas in this day and age.) I ignored them. But then one day, I had (something similar to) this dialogue:

Unknown sender: "Merry Christmas, love you guys."
Me: "Who is this?"
Unknown sender: "Daniel [last name redacted]."
Me: "I think you have the wrong number."
Unknown sender: "I'm looking for Atlas."

I ignored him after that, but I was just like none of my actual friends sent me a text saying "Merry Christmas, love you guys," but some random dude did (and yes, I know he thought I was someone else).