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San Diego, CA You know you're a redneck Jedi when...

Discussion in 'Pacific Regional Discussion' started by foxbatkllr, Oct 3, 2002.

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  1. foxbatkllr

    foxbatkllr Jedi Knight star 6

    Jul 27, 2001
    Hey I just got this in my email from Twisted Humor. It's pretty funny:

    You're A Redneck Jedi When

    1. You use the force to cheat at fishing, bowling, and long-distance spitting.

    2. More than half the droids you own don't function.

    3. The number of blasters you own exceeds your I. Q.

    4. You wonder why Luke and Leia never got married.

    5. You used a carbon-freezing chamber to store the 78 Wampas you shot while vacationing on Hoth.

    6. Your moonshine is made on the moon.

    7. You don't like wearing a Jedi robe because it prevents access to the dip stored in your back pocket.

    8. Sandpeople back down from your mama.

    9. You've used Jedi mind control to talk your way out of a DUI.

    10. You've strangled people with the force because they laughed at your accent.

    11. You built an outhouse over the Sarlaac.

    12. You've argued with a Jawa over scavenging rights to a broken droid.

    13. A Wookie has told you that you need to shave.

    14. You've wrecked several landspeeders while lighting cigarettes with your lightsaber.

    15. You don't think the Ewoks are primitive.

    16. You've gone AT-AT tipping.

    17. Jabba's pig guards think you have a hygiene problem.

    18. You consider your lightsaber the ultimate bug zapper.

    19. The Rancor monster refused to eat you.

    20. You discovered that your greatest enemy is, in fact, your
    father, who also happens to be your brother.
  2. Mara_Jade_Fan

    Mara_Jade_Fan Jedi Knight star 6

    Feb 1, 2002
    LOL! :D (Wouldn't Luke be considered a redneck Jedi? He was a hick moisture farmer afterall. ;) )
  3. AnakinWisler

    AnakinWisler Jedi Padawan star 4

    Aug 7, 2002
  4. jawajames

    jawajames FF Pacific RSA / Chapter Rep San Diego, CA star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Apr 26, 2002
    dont forget:

    you've got a landspeeder in your front yard.. on blocks...

    your jedi robe is camouflage...

    and you use the force to get yourself a beer during the game so you dont have to leave the barcolounger..

  5. Mara_Jade_Fan

    Mara_Jade_Fan Jedi Knight star 6

    Feb 1, 2002
    ^LOL! And wouldn't redneck Jedi prefer shotguns over lightsabers? ;)
  6. Obey Wann

    Obey Wann Former RMFF CR & SW Region RSA star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jan 14, 2000

    Good ones. :D
  7. Animaster

    Animaster Jedi Padawan star 4

    Mar 12, 2001
    And most importantly, your lightsaber is you only friend as well as your trusty cattle prod.
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