Zen Thoughts

Discussion in 'Daytona Beach, FL' started by Q99213, May 30, 2003.

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  1. Q99213 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 3, 2001
    star 4
    Zen-like Thoughts (recycled)

    1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of
    me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty
    much leave me the hell alone.

    2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and
    a leaky tire. (boy don't I know it)

    3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your
    neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

    5. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be
    promoted.

    7. Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.

    8. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

    9. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of
    payments.

    10. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
    That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have
    their shoes.

    11. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish,
    and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

    12. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was
    probably worth it.

    13. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

    14. Some days you are the bug; some days you are the windshield.

    16. Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes
    from bad judgment.

    17. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put
    it back in your pocket.

    18. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

    19. Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side and a dark side,
    and
    it holds the universe together.

    20. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

    21. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are
    moving.

    22. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

    23. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

    24. We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our ass...then
    things get worse.

    25. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative
    on
    the same night.

    26. No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too
    seriously.

    27. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to
    make a big deal about your birthday...around age 11.

    28. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

    29. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

    THE MOST WASTED DAY OF ALL IS ONE IN WHICH WE HAVE NOT LAUGHED!
  2. Captain_NoBeard Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 31, 2003
    star 1
    Very nice! I have a few more to contribute:

    1) If vegetable oil is made from vegetables, olive oil from olives and so on, what is baby oil made from?

    2) If you must put forth your hand, withhold your anger. If you must put forth your anger, withhold your hand.

    3) Those who love the law and sausage should see neither being made.

    4) Don't flaunt your success, but don't apologize for it either.

    5) All generalizations have exceptions, including this one.

    and along the same lines,

    6) Exercise moderation in all things, including moderation itself.
  3. Captain_NoBeard Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 31, 2003
    star 1
    Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
  4. Q99213 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 3, 2001
    star 4
    Man who pees on fan take warm shower
  5. Captain_NoBeard Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 31, 2003
    star 1
    Anybody in a mystical-type frame of mind?

    A thread of thought coalesced in my head last night, composed of little fragments of useful insight that have collected themselves from numerous sources (so nobody quote me, okay?) and happened to congeal in a flash of the obvious while I was eating dinner (hey is this a run-on sentence or what?) and that thought was:
    A good many people are not half as foolish as they delude themselves into thinking they are.

    The truth is that they have already collected, over the course of their own lifetimes so far, enough knowledge and experience and good-old common sense to allow for their being referred to as "sages" by others . . . but others do not call them this.

    The reason is that these people (seriously, they compose a sizable chunk of the population!) haven't the confidence to USE all of these useful bits all at the appropriate times. They know perfectly well how to, I think subconsciously, but part of them is afraid of the responsibility of being labeled "wise". The implications are too staggering for them: that it does not take a mountain or a life of seclusion or even old age to attain wisdom (in fact little children would be the wisest of all had they the proper experience). People would come to them for advice all the time (there IS a reason that some of the wise turn to a life of seclusion after all) :)

    And perhaps a part of their inner wisdom knows that if they WERE to ACT wise, they would no longer BE so, because this frame of mind might lead them to arrogance, which in any universe is most unwise.

    Half of wisdom seems to be a matter of exercising the potential of all the useful bits, and avoiding stupid mistakes that, had you been paying attention, you never would have made in the first place.
    (Ever get a test back and look at one of the errors you made and said "DOH!" because you KNEW better? . . . or committed a grievous faux pas during casual conversation that SHOULD have occurred to you before you said it . . .)

    Whew! Well that was a load off my brain. Anyone have tidbits of insight to add?
  6. Q99213 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 3, 2001
    star 4
    Hmmmmmm, a very profound realization. I can see where that comes from. If I may add...

    I agree with your idea that many people have the capacity to be wise and knowledgable, but perhaps the reason this ability never comes about, or comes about too late to be of any use, is because their mind is so preoccupied that it gets 'lazy'. Hence the reason many smart people seem to be absent minded (I myself am one of them. Often times I forget some of the most basic things or important appointments simply because I am thinking about so many different things).

    So while these people have the ability to be wise, they don't simply say 'I don't want the responsibility' but their brain says 'Stack overflow error' :p
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