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Zeugma Incorrect Boredom-Qui-Gon AU Mindflash

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Arco, Jun 27, 2002.

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  1. Arco

    Arco Jedi Youngling

    May 29, 2002

    My screaming face reflected back at me a thousand times, an image off a mighty insect eye never blinking, backsliding through the third infinity like a stone skipping across the placid waters of a dream that comes while I'm awake and unsuspecting.




    Hellwater Flats was a wind-blown dust ridden and seedy little town on the outskirts of the middle of nowhere. The sun peered through the rainless clouds and if the heat made a sound it would be howling like a madman. Tar slathered roofs dripped down the rotting wood siding of the few buildings that comprised the town like black tears of oppression and pain. The dried and caked dirt lay splayed and cracked deep like the insane sun was trying to burn through the earth to caress its molten brother at the core.

    Qui-Gon Jinn stumbled from the churning and blowing dust that ripped and coated. His eyes watered and squinted at the probing particles, creating muddy streaks on his face. He carried a saddle that combined with the pounding heat to nearly drive him to his knees. His horse was dead, its bloated carcass left back in the desert to bake and rot.

    It was rotting like the bodies askew on the German wire in the scorched battlefield scarred with watery trenches and tiny ponds that used to be foxholes. Thick sheets of rain fell on the ripe human meat scattered like beef remnants on a slaughterhouse-killing floor. A dioramic abattoir, God's arcane masterpiece painted in blood and stringy gore like a hellish and divine fresco of sorrow.

    The rain sizzled and boiled off the barrel of Qui-Gon's carbine. He was strung on the razor wire like a macabre marionette. He was hopelessly entwined in the sharp tentacles, the rusty barbs digging into his gangrenous flesh with every movement. He looked down at his smoking rifle again. It smoked as his blood dripped with the falling rain. He strained his neck upwards, looking through the mist at the German lines.

    He saw the German machine gun placement just as they fired. Qui-Gon jerked on the wire as his body was riddled with bullets.



    "Instant information accumulation does not equal understanding." Windu said, "You will simply become over-informed about things we can do little or nothing about."

    Qui-Gon looked at him absently, "But I-"

    Qui-Gon walked through the shifting forests. His senses blurred into imagination and the fanciful. He began to pretend he was walking on the bottom of an ocean. The fresh air in which the branches swayed became currents of less-dense water ripping the watery leaves from shrugging trees. The birds were schools of strange fish riding the cool currents. The underwater world was silent.

    She was there then, the woman Qui-Gon loved.

    Her dress flowed in the water wind, a blue shimmering among the blue world. Her black hair spilled down around her exposed shoulders like an ebony shower waiting to be touched. She held her tiny hands out to him and he stepped close. She smelled of saltwater and flowers. He stared into her violet eyes, their vibrancy gripping his heart. Her red lips parted and tiny fish swam forth, encircling the embracing couple. Her skin was so warm and soft.

    "There is a certain futility son," his father said, "in people like myself taking direct action in the affairs of the galaxy." He put his hand on Qui-Gon's shoulder and looked his son in the eyes. "It is my destiny to live a small life son. I'll never be an explorer or a hero or a famous man. But you Qui-Gon, you have a gift that must not be squandered in obscurity. That is why you must return to the temple."

    "But I want to be here with you." Qui-Gon said forcefully.

    " Son," his father smiled, "I'd love nothing more than to watch you grow into the good man that I know you will be. But it is your destiny to lead a more important life."

    Qui-Gon found himself in a small auditorium full of tiny animals
  2. Arco

    Arco Jedi Youngling

    May 29, 2002
    Cheaply upping the story because this board is so active, it was thrown to the eighth page before anybody read it.
  3. Arco

    Arco Jedi Youngling

    May 29, 2002
    Upping this story again 'cause it keeps getting buried on page 13.
  4. JediShampoo

    JediShampoo Jedi Master star 1

    May 5, 2000
    Wow. Madmartigan. Coooool. Must up this story. Keeps getting buried under bad Obi-Wan AU and Jag/Jaina/Kyp triangles.
  5. Sara_Kenobi

    Sara_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master star 7

    Sep 21, 2000
    Just some advice. You might want to actually get one story going for awhile, before starting several small ones.

    It's easier to manage. :)

    The use of so many Caps also is slightly distracting. Especially in the first post!
  6. zeekveerko

    zeekveerko Jedi Knight star 5

    Apr 30, 2002
    arco, you've done it again.

    [face_laugh] - mad martigan!

    i love this montage, though as always, the gore put me off momentarily. indeed, you've illustrated the final moments of qui-gon's life so eerily and masterfully, it's no wonder some people just aren't getting it.
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