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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Resource Fanfic Writer's Desk: Your Place for Writing Discussion, Questions, and Advice

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction and Writing Resource' started by Luna_Nightshade, Nov 24, 2011.

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  1. Grievous2003

    Grievous2003 Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 31, 2019
    Today the gears in my brain were turning and I thought I came up with a way to save Jango Fett during the Battle of Geonosis. During Attack of the Clones when the Jedi and droids are fighting in the arena, Jango goes after Mace Windu who was disarmed by the reek. Jango attempts to grab Mace's lightsaber, but the Jedi Master uses the Force to call it back to him. I remembers from one of the comics that Jango's gloves had electromagnets in them that allowed him to pull his blasters towards him from a distance. He did this when he met with Count Dooku per the comic page below. A thought that went through my mind is that Jango could have used those gloves to pull Mace's lightsaber to him before Mace had a chance to use the Force to retrieve it.

    However, upon further review, I saw that Jango stated that he was utilizing electromagnetic gloves AND guns. It would appear that guns and the gloves have a special connection that lets Jango pull only his guns. This is further demonstrated by the fact that the gloves did not attract Dooku's lightsaber. Although it could be possible that the gloves pulled the guns and not the lightsaber because of Jango's commands. I just wanted to verify if it were possible for to use his gloves to attract other metallic objects or do they appear to only be wired towards his blasters.

    [​IMG]
     
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  2. Gamiel

    Gamiel Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Dec 16, 2012
    I would say that they appear to only be wired towards his blasters. Another way you could have him survive, is that some things happens that notably separate Mace and Jango from each other and Jango decide that the heat is a bit to much for him (maybe he has been wounded a bit more than he was when he lost his head), or maybe he is knocked out and some of the Separatist droids carry him away.
     
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  3. gaarastar58

    gaarastar58 Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Dec 19, 2010
    When referring to the ranks and titles of Jedi - should these use a capital letter?

    For example, if I am writing a scene with multiple Jedi of different ranks do you think it is best to write them as "Jedi Knight" "Padawan" or "Jedi Initiate" - or simply write their title in lowercase? I am asking becase it seems like a lot of my sentences seems to contain a bunch of captial letters and it seems kind of distracting. When I consider how I would write existing military ranks and official titles there are times when it could be both - do you think that should be the same when referring to Jedi?

    i.e.

    "John Smith is a colonel in the army" - "I am Colonel John Smith" - "My son is applying to medical school to train as a doctor" - May I introduce you to Doctor Smith"

    "A group of jedi knights/padawans sat around the fire" - "I am Jedi Master John Smith"

    Not really looking for a definitive answer, just keen to hear other people's thoughts on this. Thanks in advance.
     
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  4. Gamiel

    Gamiel Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Dec 16, 2012
    Looking for suggestions for a Into the Spider-verse follow up fic. Peter B. Parker gets thrown into a new alternative Earth and meets some new alternative spiders. I'm basing Peter B. Parker's Earth on the 90's cartoon, the Maguire movies and some elements of the 90’s SM comics, but need suggestions on how the other spiders Earths are notably different from the stereotypical idea about spider-man, his friends and/or villains. I need the ideas to have in the back of my mind for when it comes to the characters react to different things.
     
  5. Mira Grau

    Mira Grau Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    May 11, 2016
    Might be a bit of a tired idea but there is an Earth 96 wich is a german fanon project, not sure how much of it is based in canon, but its basically a world where the heroes are villians and vice versa, due to key events in their lives going different. Like Tony Stark being a Lex Luthor esque ruthless buissness man after realizing how little the world actually cared for him while abducted.

    In that Earth Peter Parker actually hunts down Uncle Ben´s killer and kills him out of revenege, traumatized and unable to keep his job and thus support his aunt Peter falls first into small time crime, while loosing himself more and more. MJ decides for Harry Osborn(who´s father is a hero here) and Peter cuts ties with them. When his aunt is later killed in the crossfire of the heroic Doctor Octopus and the here villanous Daredevil, Peter fully becomes consumed by revenge primarily on Doctor O. Later when the alien symbiot tries to take control of him he lets it happen in hopes of getting more power, turning into a being of pure agression. If you want I could send you translations of the entire articles on relevant charatcers.
     
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  6. Kit'

    Kit' Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Oct 30, 1999
    That is correct. In Jedi Master John Smith the term Jedi Master is a title and needs capitalisation where as the in the other one it's still a noun but doesn't get capitalised.
     
  7. Gamiel

    Gamiel Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Dec 16, 2012
    Oh, that sounds interesting, not really what I'm looking for but can be a fun read. I'll gladly read a translations of the entire articles on relevant charatcers :)

    I have to admit I'm more looking for suggestions similar to how this short summary of Miles' Earth's differences:
    Spider-Man has a high-tech underground lair.
    Green Goblin works for the Kingpin.
    Dr. Octopus is a slimmer woman with a bit of a "old hippy scientist" look.
    Scorpion is a cyborg and latino with gang tattoos.
    There has been a large inflation so everything looks highly expansive.
    Prowler is a villain instead of an ally to Spider-Man.
    Spider-Man is a bellowed hero.

    Or MCU (focusing on Spider-Man)
    New York was attacked by aliens 5-10 years ago and driven away but some of their left behind tech has been jury rigged by criminals for their own use
    Spider-Man is Iron-Man's protégé
    Flash is a internet bully and fellow tech-nerd
    The Mary-Jane counterpart is named Michelle Jones and is little like her red haired, outgoing party girl/actress/model counterparts
    Peter and aunt May lives in a apartment instead of a in a house
    Mysterio is not a man but a team
     
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2020
  8. Mira Grau

    Mira Grau Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    May 11, 2016
    Thing is I looked into this today and I´m not sure if I even can do that given that its other peoples work so translating it would require their okay and most of them aren´t even around that forum anymore. So I don´t know if its even possible. So could potentially give summaries but I wouldn´t be comfortable with full translations.
     
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  9. Gamiel

    Gamiel Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Dec 16, 2012
    You could link me to the post and I can try do do some translations of my own (mostly using google but since I'm just after general ideas so is not that to terrible)
     
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  10. Mira Grau

    Mira Grau Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    May 11, 2016
    Sure, here:
    https://www.fanfiktion.de/s/4f2320e300006e4f069032c8/1/Marvel-Erde-96

    The main guy putting these up Crazy Kenny is also still around there and he knows english so you might be able to PM him on further questions.
     
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  11. Grievous2003

    Grievous2003 Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 31, 2019
    A question I have regarding Savage Opress is if he had completed his Sith training, how powerful would you say he would be compared to Vader or Sidious? In the Clone Wars, we see Savage accomplish amazing feats with minimal Sith training, including simultaneously force choking Dooku and Ventress, force repulse an entire room of battle droids, kill council member Adi Gallia, and briefly hold his own in a duel with Sidious. Based on the fact that Savage did all these things with only a year's worth of training or so under his belt is very impressive. Some of the acts like force choking someone as powerful as Dooku and force repulsing all those droids were only accomplished after his anger triggered him. I feel after completing his training Savage would be able to perform feats like this on command. In addition, Savage put up a better fight against Sidious than some of the best members of the Jedi council (as pointed out by Dave Filoni).

    In my story, Savage continues and completes his training under Maul during the time period between Revenge of the Sith and A New Hope. I just wanted your opinions on how powerful he would be if he could reach his potential. I feel at the very minimum he would be as powerful as Vader was, but I don't think he would be more powerful than Sidious. On the spectrum between Vader and Sidious, where do you think a fully trained Savage Opress would be powerwise?
     
    Last edited: Aug 28, 2020
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  12. Grievous2003

    Grievous2003 Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 31, 2019
    Hey guys, new question. I am trying to figure out a way for the Dathomir massacre to be caused by the Republic instead of the Separatists. I figured Palpatine would be capable of falsifying evidence that the Nightsisters were working with the Separatists to justify the invasion. He could also have help from some of his Republic military officers like Tarkin who would support the invasion. The military was able to keep the whole Death Star project a secret from the Jedi for the entirety of the war. I figured Palpatine and his military officers would orchestrate it such that a Jedi who had no issues with slaughtering all of the Nightsisters, such as Pong Krell.

    The only issue I have is figuring out how to get the clone troopers to willing participate in the massacre. When it comes to battle, the clones have no problem fighting for their lives. However, it wasn't just the warriors that were killed but also children. Battle droids obviously had no trouble shooting younglings, but clones would not do so willingly. A thought I had was that Palpatine could preemptively execute Order 66 for the clone troopers sent to Dathomir to ensure that all the Nightsisters were wiped out. The issue with this is that the Jedi leading them would be killed too. There is also a risk that Order 66 would be exposed so military officers would have to leave no witnesses, but it would be hard to wipe out an entire battalion of clone troopers. I just feel that this would leave the Jedi asking too many questions to keep it secretly. How do you think the Republic could carry out the massacre?
     
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  13. Mira Grau

    Mira Grau Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    May 11, 2016
    Not sure if you need to go that far. The Nightsisters are clearly darksiders so that could motivate the Jedi to attack them. Also they treat the Nightbrothers as pretty much slaves so maybe that´s the justification the republic uses? To try and free the slaves and ensure the dark sider Nighstsisters can´t join up with the CIS? Maybe Anakin, as a former slave, really gets enraged and manipulated a bit by Palpatine orders to massacre the witches? The did massacre the Tusken raiders before after all and even Obi Wan approved of Rex killing the defensless Zygerian slaver during that story arc.
     
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  14. Grievous2003

    Grievous2003 Jedi Knight star 1

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    Jan 31, 2019
    Thanks for responding back to me. My main question is how would clone troopers deal with captured Nightsisters children and warriors who surrendered. In my story, Pong Krell is an agent of Sidious so he is sent to Dathomir to kill the witches. I know Krell would have no reason issues with orderIng the children prisoners to be executed, but I am wondering if the clones would be willing to go through with it. During the Umbara arc, the clones were initially prepared to execute their own clone brothers but ultimately defied Krell’s orders. True Rex did kill an unarmed Zygerrian slaver, but we are talking about children here who did not participate in the battle on Dathomir. In this scenario, the clones would have just witnessed a bunch of witches, zombies, and tamed rancors kill a whole bunch of their brothers, but would that be enough to push them to execute the prisoners? While Anakin did kill all the Tuskens including the children, that is because they killed his own mother. I am unsure if the clones have that deep a bond with their fellow soldiers.
     
  15. Mira Grau

    Mira Grau Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    May 11, 2016
    Well I think this depends a bit on the circumstances. I could see the Nightsisters largley fight to the death so there might be not real issues with surrendering ones and its not that every army in history hasn´t shot prisoneers if they where "too dangerous to control" wich is something defenetly applying to the force senetive Nightsisters. As for the children question is how many there are, the tribe we see in TCW doesn´t seem very large so maybe there are only a handfull of children. Either you could sidestep the issue and simply say they got lost/killed in the crossfire(maybe the republic used artillery/bombers), or maybe instead of killing them Palpatine had Krell take them in, telling the clones they would be given in the care of the Jedi but in truth handing them to Palpatine, who might try to train them as future Inquistors. Or maybe the Nightsisters told the kids to run into the wilderness when the battle begun and now they are alone lost on a deadly world with their adult protectors all dead, wich would also keep the clones from directly killing them.
     
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  16. Grievous2003

    Grievous2003 Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 31, 2019
    So while thinking about how the Republic could destroy the Nightsisters, it made me thinking of expanding on the biochips in the clones brains. During the Galactic Civil War, Gallius Rax was able to use biochips to mind control Rebel Alliance prisoners, including Brentin Lore Wexley, Jonda Jae-Talwar, and Esdo, to secretly serve the Empire by transmitting faint signals into their heads. A thought I had was that the biochips would not just be used to kill the Jedi but also reduce the clones to mindless drones to serve the will of the Empire. In my mind, it doesn't make sense for the clones to willingly enforce the will of a tyrannical empire, which includes genocide and slavery, when they spent three years trying to protect the galaxy from the presumed evil of the Separatists. Palpatine would activate the chips through a special transmitter provided by the Kaminoans that would enable him to transmit specific orders for the clones to follow. Such orders would include the subjugation and enslavement of resisting worlds, execution of prisoners and civilians, and following orders of specific individuals like Anakin Skywalker despite him being a Jedi. Order 66 would be one of the preprogrammed protocols installed in the chips. I also feel that this would be ironic in that the clones always prided themselves on being superior to droids and now they were reduced programmed drones like the droids. I know you guys are thinking "This is exactly what happened in the canon." The thing is the chips were only used for Order 66 while afterwards the clones willing went on the serve the Empire and commit its atrocities. In this scenario, free will is removed entirely and the clones live every day of their lives as drones. This brought up an idea a had about a self-terminate order implanted in the biochips.

    What I was thinking for my story is that Palpatine manipulates events so that the Republic sends a clone army to occupy Dathomir. Palpatine uses this as a test for the biochips by transmitting orders to the clones to wipe out all of the Nightsisters and Nightbrothers. After the clones finished executing everyone on Dathomir, in order to keep the chips secret and leave no witnesses, Palpatine transmits orders to the clone legion to self-terminate (kill themselves). He would then create some story about how the Nightsisters' magic forced the clones to commit suicide. At the end of the war, an enhanced Maul defeats and kills Sidious and takes the transmitter used to manipulate the clones. Maul then remotely activates the chips to execute Order 66 and kill all the Jedi. After the Jedi had been wiped out, Maul sends out a self-terminate order to every single clone in the Republic Grand Army to kill themselves so as to leave no force opposing the Separatist Droid Army (It is basically the same as the shutdown command used on the droid army but more gruesome). Does this ability to send a self-terminate order to the clone troopers through the biochips seem plausible?
     
  17. Seldes_Katne

    Seldes_Katne Force Ghost star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 18, 2002
    Quick question: has anyone seen a form of polite address for a woman (or a person of any gender, if it's not specific to women) who has no formal title? Something similar to Ms. (or Miss/Mrs., depending on personal preference) in English? In Star Wars: Rebels, Maul refers to Ahsoka as "Lady Tano," but I can't tell if that's a standard form, or a not-so-subtle dig at the fact that she's not officially a Jedi. I"m basically looking for "Nice to meet you, ______ [name]."

    Thank you!
     
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  18. Kahara

    Kahara FFoF Hostess Extraordinaire star 4 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Mar 3, 2001
    @Seldes_Katne , I can't recall anything Star Wars canon off the top of my head, but did a historical search out of curiosity and found this site interesting. http://walternelson.com/dr/node/253 I kind of like "Goodbeing" or some phrase to that effect as an equivalent to goodman/goodwife listed there! Though that was apparently mostly for people of peasant rank and might not be as neutral as to class as what you're looking for.
     
    Last edited: Sep 6, 2020
  19. Seldes_Katne

    Seldes_Katne Force Ghost star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 18, 2002
    Thank you, @Kahara. I just wanted to make sure there wasn't some obvious word in the GFFA that I was missing. I do like the idea of "goodbeing(s)" or "gentlebeing(s)," which would be useful for addressing groups. I've been doing some research on science fiction honorifics, and I've become partial to the term "Myr," which was apparently invented by SF author David Marusek. I rather like that one because it looks a lot like "Mr./Mrs./Ms.," so it's easy for me to remember. :D Its plural is "Myren."
     
    Last edited: Sep 7, 2020
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  20. Gamiel

    Gamiel Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Dec 16, 2012
    based om my readings of older english stuff do it seems that "fellow" have sometime been used when people don't have a known title and don't seem to be notably over or under you in social status.
     
    Last edited: Sep 7, 2020
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  21. pronker

    pronker Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 28, 2007
    I haven't an answer to the "title" question, and "Citizen X" seems okay to use although the term comes from France's post-Revolutionary time. One instance about titles is that Bail (?) called the Jedi "Your Graces" and the term puzzles me because it's for Dukes and Duchesses.[face_party] It also invokes religious terminology, another curious thing.[face_dunno]
     
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  22. Gamiel

    Gamiel Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Dec 16, 2012
    Feels like @GrandAdmiralJello should know this kind of stuff

    Adding to this: "master" is often also used similar to how we use "mister" in older stuff, or at least in stuff that's placed in older times, and you sometime added a "young" before for a younger man, femininum to that is "mistress".
     
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  23. Grievous2003

    Grievous2003 Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 31, 2019
    In Legends, General Grievous had computers implanted in his brain that enabled him to instantly analyze his opponents' attacks and tell him the best method of defeating said opponents. Grievous could use his cybernetic brain to breakdown each movement of any fighter he came into contact with. This also enabled Grievous to imitate the fighting style of any opponent he fought, as demonstrated when he performed his own version of Vapaad during his duel with Mace Windu. The downside to this is that the living part of Grievous' brain did not always agree with the algorithms the computers employed.

    I have at times pondered of implementing in my story Grievous undergoing a Dark Side ritual that grants him Force sensitivity by extracting the Force energy from a living Jedi and transferring it to the cyborg. All Force-users employ precognition to enable them to anticipate and respond to danger, which included responding to an enemy's lightsaber strikes or blockling blaster bolts. My question is if Grievous were to become Force-sensitive, would his precognition abilities work with or against the computers in his brain? Grievous is already able to anticipate enemy attacks as well as a Force-user thanks to his cybernetic brain enhancements. If he gained to ability to anticipate enemy attacks through the Force as well, it could be possible for his reflexes to be enhanced even further as his mind's response time is being increased by both the computers and the Force. On the other hand, it was stated that Grievous' living and cybernetic brains were not always aligned, so if the Force tells Grievous to do one thing and the computers tell him to do something else it could create confusion in Grievous that would leave him vulnerable during a fight. Which way do you see this going?
     
    Last edited: Sep 9, 2020
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  24. GregMcP

    GregMcP Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 7, 2015
    I love that.
    He could get more gruesome and rip the living nervous system from a Jedi and have it surgically implanted into his robotic limbs....

    The internal conflict between Droid and Man and The Force is really nice
     
  25. Grievous2003

    Grievous2003 Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 31, 2019
    Well the way Grievous would become Force sensitive is Talzin and the Nightsisters would use the Bardottan Sphere to drain the Living Force from a captured Jedi and then transfer the Living Force to Grievous. Its basically what Talzin was trying to do for herself in Season 6 but with Grievous instead.

    What I am trying to figure out is if Grievous' brain computers would work with or against his Force precognition. If the computers and Force sensing worked together, Grievous could be the ultimate duelist. If they worked against each other, Grievous could be unable to properly respond to enemy attacks and be vulnerable. The only Force sensitive I know who had a computer implanted in their brain is Aurra Sing; in Legends, Aurra's biocomputer served to improve her reactions and awareness but they never go into detail about how it impacted her Force sensing abilities. Do you feel that brain computers and Force precognition would be a great combination or only hurt Grievous' fighting?
     
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