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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Before - Legends Victory - Kessel Run Challenge 2023

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Vek Talis, Jan 9, 2023.

  1. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    Ooh, more Xova! Snarky, feisty Xova! And even in just a few words we see how her snark and impetuosity (both of which are of a totally different brand than Vek’s) can be both her greatest strength and a huge hindrance—and that she has a good side that appreciates the value of compassion. There is obviously some kind of terrible, unhappy history between her and that uncle; is that person someone I should recognize? I get more intrigued by this character each time you write about her, so do keep it up! =D=
     
  2. amidalachick

    amidalachick FFoF Hostess Extraordinaire star 5 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 3, 2003
    Great set! Like @Findswoman I'm really intrigued by Xova and I hope there's more to come with her.

    Such a great description.

    And another great description.

    And then this ending, whoa! It seems like there's quite a story there.

    Awesome work, again, and I look forward to reading more! :)
     
  3. Chyntuck

    Chyntuck Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 11, 2014
    Hello there double drabbler!

    Loved your interpretation of the prompt "juggernaut" and how you left it open-ended for the reader to decide if the term better applied to Vek or Xova. Also, this bit:
    Why do I feel that some of Vek's snark is rubbing off on his former master?

    For the other two drabbles I'd like to focus on Xova's personality a bit. Adventure, excitement, anger... a Jedi these things seeks not, but she's very much into it, isn't she?
    Ahem. I'm not entirely sure I buy this; I'm afraid this very young padawan is deluding herself.

    And then:
    Oh oh ooooh! Looks like we'll be getting our full explanation soon!
     
  4. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 2018
    [face_dunno]Whatever makes you say that, @earlybird-obi-wan ? Was it something Xova said? :p


    Thanks, Master. I value good snark, but it's good to know I can spew out many different shades of it. [face_sick]

    Oh, I'd say there's a good chance you've seen that uncle before, perhaps wearing Xova's own face in a previous week's challenge response. o_O

    There is definitely more to come from Xova. This week's challenge has really lit a fire under my bum. :p Not the visual anyone wanted, I'm sure. :p

    I'd say that more is definitely on its way. :D

    Thank you. :) Thanks for appreciating the action, too. Closer to the answer with this week's challenge... perhaps. ;) Thanks for reading.


    ;) I'm a giver: I give. Usually, it's grief, but sometimes I slip. :p

    Perceptive you are, yes?

    Uh-huh. You and Vek are on the right track. ;)

    Well, that particular drabble was from Vek's pov, and he knew of a guy named Cudgel, or Hammer, or Mace, or something blunt, who was a very angry individual, but dedicated to the Light. It's possible, but in Xova's case? [face_dunno]Plus, in KotOR there's a master named Vrook who is irascible as well. :) And of course, we all know Vek has some... secret knowledge he's not willing to share. :D

    Perhaps. Or another piece of the puzzle, at least. :D



    Thanks to everyone who read and enjoyed my challenge so far...

    Now that we have a less restrictive word count, this week's fic could get a bit... lengthy. :D No worries if it gets so long that y'all don't have time to properly read it. I can get a bit... wordy. :rolleyes: (and yes, I overuse the ellipses... and I'm proud of that. :p )

    EDITS: I got my e-girlfriend's MacBook recently and the autocorrect is quite irascible, so if what I typed doesn't make sense, it's probably autocorrect's fault :p I'm going back to correct as I notice it, but this thing is a beast.
     
    Last edited: Feb 13, 2023
  5. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 2018
    Title: Antagonism
    Author: Vek Talis
    Length: At least three small(ish) chapters
    Timeframe: 171 years before KotOR 4127 BBY approx.
    Genre: Wouldn’t you like to know?
    Characters: OCs Vek Talis, Vizif, Xova, Aloshla Babry, others
    Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars and never will.
    Note: This is for the Kessel Run Challenge. May the Force have mercy on my essence. Word count = 3,520
    • Write a story of at least 500 words in which one of your favorite protagonists/heroic characters is the antagonist/villain. This can be an AU, but it doesn't necessarily have to be.
    • Minimum 500 words, no maximum limit
    • Entries due Monday, February 20th at 11:59pm EST


    ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

    “Padawan Ryrbi has fled the enclave.” Master Iobat was stoic in the face of so many padawans running amok.

    “We think he has been influenced by some Sith holocrons we’d brought in for study,” Master Nur’rovo added. She was always eager to help explain the masters’ complete lack of wisdom. Turning to the third master, she said, “Why is Knight Talis suddenly privy to this council’s difficulties, Master Vandar?”

    Someone has to figure out how to fix the problems your apathy creates. Since he couldn’t say that aloud, Vek raised a bushy eyebrow. “I take it a missing padawan is somewhat of a concern,” he replied stonily. “Exposing them to Sith holocrons doesn’t seem the most expedient way to keep them in the enclave.”

    That got him a veiled glare from Iobat, Nur’rovo and Vandar. Got to learn to keep my mouth shut, at least from time to time, he thought.

    “His master chose to educate him in that manner,” Iobat said, then shifted his tone of voice - nicer, Vek thought - to address his companion. “Master Vizif, do you have a recommendation on how to proceed?”

    Immediately Vek’s senses perked up. He knew he and his former master had been summoned here, and now he thought he understood the reasoning. The Unifying Force twitched. Blood. Pain. The Dark Side. The hairs at the back of Vek’s neck began to stand on end. They couldn’t…

    Vizif’s left hand came up to her chin as she thought. Through their never faded bond, Vek saw the image form in her mind even as she did. “I have been looking for Xova’s final trial,” Vizif said and Vek’s mood plummeted. “What better way to teach her compassion than to look on one recently fallen and bring him back from the brink.”

    “Perhaps I could be excused, Masters; it seems you have this situation well in hand,” Vek said as calmly as he could. Xova was a capable padawan, she was skilled, she worked harder than most padawans, the Living Force flowed through her like she was already a knight… but a compassionate soul? What were they thinking? Was every Jedi in the enclave on drugs? Thankfully, someone else had taken his portion - Iobat, probably.

    “Wait, Knight Talis,” Vandar said, crushing his hopes, glueing his feet to the floor. At Vek’s nod, the diminutive master continued, “What say you on this subject?”

    All eyes turned to him, as it were. He glared at each of the heads of the enclave, but as was his wont, he couldn’t meet Vizif’s gaze for long before glancing away. “I don’t believe I’m qualified to speak on this matter, Master Vandar,” he said after a pause for thought. “I feel I would have nothing useful to say.”

    “As I thought,” Nur’rovo said. “You may consider yourself dismissed, Knight,” she added tightly.

    Vek hurried from the auditorium as quickly as decorum would carry him. A knot was developing in the pit of his stomach. No, more like an acidic welt. Ryrbi’s master was… Reifern Cloucor. A year before, she’d been on a mission that took her near Korriban. Vek had met her several times, once since that mission. She wasn’t the same human he’d known then. Distant… anhedonic - a far away look in her eye.

    Her padawan hadn’t accompanied her on that mission, but he’d changed slightly too, since she’d returned. Vek had been to Korriban himself. The rock on that planet was… wrong. It had absorbed too much of the Dark Side. It was a world populated by Sith when the Sith were just a race of humanoids unknowing of the Light and Dark Sides. Dark Jedi had taught and manipulated them, millennia ago.

    Temporary quarters were on the lower level of the enclave. As Vek rounded a corner, he sensed Aloshla Babry, the main tech, not far away. Reifern’s quarters were up ahead. The door was locked, but Vek… improvised. As the door opened with a swoosh, movement stole his attention. The Force didn’t seem alarmed, so his lightsaber remained at his side.

    “Master Cloucor?” Vek called as he entered. “Your door seems to have… slid open of its own volition.” Not a lie, the door did in fact slide open on its own. A startled gasp hit his ears. “Ah, Tech Babry.” Now he stopped short, slid his arms into the sleeves of his robe, cocked his head to one side and grinned. “I take it you were repairing the fresher in there?”

    Tech Babry had barely taken Master Cloucor’s robe off and tossed it back into the closet when he spoke. “Knight Talis… I was… I, uh…” she ran down, unable to go on. Reluctantly, she spread her hands and dropped her gaze to the floor. “I find myself unable to lie to you, sir.”

    Was she… smitten with him? The Force seemed to think so. Vek wasn’t… used to adoration. When she didn’t say anything more, he asked, “And so, instead of lying, you just won’t complete a sentence around me?” He smirked and held up his hands, palms out, when her eyes nearly popped from her head. “It’s all right, Tech Babry; I have no intention of turning you in for your, er, indiscretions. I have my own… error to commit right at the moment. So if you’d be so kind as to excuse me for a bit?”

    Eyes still cast to the floor, Babry walked toward the door. “Of course, Knight Talis.” He won’t even call me by my given name. The thought was so loud in her mind that it nearly exploded, along with the… disappointment, sadness, accompanying it. Yes, she seemed smitten with him.

    Stellar, Vek thought. All I need is an amorous attachment. That’ll endear me to the masters.

    Fortunately, no one paid the tech any mind. Fortunately for him, unfortunately for her, as she was an interesting person in her own right and deserved recognition as an individual.

    Before she left, an idea popped into Vek’s head. “Aloshla,” he said, startling the togruta into spinning on her heel toward him. Her large, round eyes gazed up at him. “Would you mind doing me a rather large favor?” When she only nodded, he went on, “If you could keep an eye out for Padawan Xova. I suspect the enclave council will be summoning her and I’d like for you to delay her arrival if possible.”

    It took her a few moments to process what he’d just asked of her. Slowly, she nodded. “I will do my best, Knight,” she said quietly.

    “Vek,” he offered and she brightened. "And, thank you."

    After she was gone, he got down to the business at hand. Behind the dresser was a recess in the wall that shouldn’t have been there. Dark swirls twisted from it. The Unifying Force warned of dark intentions even before he peeled the false panel from the wall. Master Cloucor had gone off to Coruscant, if Vek remembered correctly. When he found the datapad, his tongue found a pocket of air at the roof of his mouth. Clack.

    “Oh, dear,” he said.
     
    Last edited: Feb 14, 2023
  6. UltramassiveUbersue

    UltramassiveUbersue Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 7, 2022
    Excellent response to the challenge! Vek getting sidetracked from his urgent mission by that awkward encounter was really funny. [face_laugh]
     
  7. pronker

    pronker Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 28, 2007
    I'm enjoying the sense of "other" because I know little of the era in which these are set; the enclave appears ... more raw than the Temple? *ponders what to say to clarify* Anyway, Vek stands out as an interesting and most capable person to write about! :)

    Sadder than sad, this first one. :(

    Su=D=ch a useful skill, with the right tools!

    Watch yourself always with Bosses because they. are. not. your friends. They may not be your enemies, either, but friends? Nope.

    She's under attack, poor thing. It is awful to contemplate mental slams like this.

    I like thinking the bonds do not disappear, as well.[:D]

    Now this is what I'm taking note of, the sense of tons o'Sith around the whole schmear.

    All along these entries I was thinking "old bat" but then I read "he" so that's not, not quite right. Anyway, a memorable name and character, obtuse as it gets SMH
     
  8. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 21, 2006
    AWW I hope Vek will rescue the padawan from the dark side. And the fun Vek had with the tech. Hilarious
     
  9. DLR001

    DLR001 Jedi Padawan star 1

    Registered:
    Feb 9, 2023
    Alright, it's a slow night here at work, so I can catch up on sharing some of my thoughts on your Kessel Run entries, Vek! I've seen all sorts of great entries but, I am a fiend for the Old Republic, so when I first saw your work set nearly two centuries prior to KotOR, I was game from the start. I'm a bit late to the party and have some catching up to do, but I'll scribble down what thoughts I can.

    Victory - as in both this thread and the first story within - was my first exposure to you and to Knight Talis, and man, what a first impression! Old Republic and tragedy? I need it. The poor child, stolen from his family and his life, and forced into an impossible situation. All for the Jedi to offer the equivalent of a passing grumble - he may not have been brave, by many standards, but Hoit was strong, a strength of character, of will, that few can muster. A pity that we will never get to see any more of it - that he will never live his life - but Victory wouldn't have hit as hard, or had its meaning, otherwise.

    Nevermind is, as others have said, a very welcome spot of levity after Victory. 2nd Person is always a bit funny to read, but having the chance to be, in some small way, Tech Babry helps make the Enclave feel more alive, and provides some poignant (and relevant) takes on the Jedi themselves. I sense some bashfulness - mayhaps a bit of tension (the good kind) - between Talis and Babry? Also, a good touch that the med-ward computer is often covered in dust - Jedi, over-reliant on the Force, might very often feel themselves above such mundane methods of healing and medicine.

    Depravity - some action, and our introduction to the fiery Padawan Xova! I like her, a complicated individual, with strengths and weaknesses - an apprpach I have enjoyed with your depictions of the Jedi thus far - but boy howdy does she have some unresolved trauma from something truly horrendous in her past. If this is allowed to fester and grow, I fear for her fate. I hope Vizif - and Vek - notice before it is too late. I really enjoyed your lightsaber combat, and the banter between Xova and Vek is delightful!

    Excitement, and right after I said how much I enjoy your combat we're treated to even more! But man, this caught my attention real quick:

    [​IMG]

    Xova, I, uh... I don't think that's the Jedi way to make a joke.

    I get more worried about her every time I see her.

    Beyond that, as others have said, I enjoyed that you focused on the forms/schools of combat the Sith used. Overall, great piece of action, and an engaging - if distressing - bit of character study for Xova.

    I have read ahead on your subsequent stories, and will share my thoughts in time, but for now my lunch break approaches, and my stomach is calling the shots right now - I am eagerly looking forward to more of your work, Vek!
     
  10. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 2018
    Hi @pronker - you raised a good question I'd like to answer, well, now.

    In the Old Republic, Dantooine was a farmland planet and home to a far away training facility, mostly hidden from events of the galaxy. There's a Training Council, usually consisting of three Masters (though I'm a bit unclear myself, I think they are supposed to be members of the larger Council on Coruscant, but maybe they don't have to be). It's a place for temporary habitation, as the enclave isn't all that large, for masters and padawans to come and go as the Jedi have need, maybe a handful of teams at any one time. It's usually a place for quiet study and meditation... but then Vek shows up and all that's out the window. :rolleyes:

    In KotOR, the enclave is where they take Revan to 'reprogram' him after his defeat and capture, so they can turn him back to the Light.

    I hope that helps. :)

    EDIT: Oh yeah, and in that time, the Sith Empire was alive and well. They had more than a few systems under their control and Sith Masters and Knights were numerous. And they culled their own ranks because they all thought they were the best, lol, so the Jedi didn't have to destroy that many of them. :p And their troopers were armored in shiny metal.
     
    Last edited: Feb 14, 2023
  11. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    Wow, you’re really going to town with these Kessel Run entries! Definitely an intriguing interpretation of Vek-as-antagonist here—though I can tell his intentions are not all bad. I just hope the little contretemps with Aloshla won’t set him back too much! They are rather cute together, I must say. :D Keep up the fab work on your Run! =D=
     
  12. pronker

    pronker Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 28, 2007
    Ahah, thanks for clarifying. Upon first reading online SW long ago, many stories used Revan and *female* Bastila; I recall wondering, because I'm not a gamer, who these folks were. Placing Revan in conjunction with Vek helps a lot. *happy sigh* So many facets of SW fandom!
     
  13. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 2018
    I'm glad you're enjoying the story. :) Yes, Aloshla is a little... quirky, shall we say? Trying on the Jedi robes while no one's looking? :p Well, so long as she's not playing around with the lightsabers, yes? More to come!


    Yes, poor Hoit. These Jedi do seem to lose a lot, don't they? Their keys, their speeders, their... padawans? What's the deal?

    Xova has been under attack for much of her life, first from someone outside herself, and more recently from within. Not even to mention the Dark Side.[face_devil]

    Yes, I can't imagine being able to have that kind of telepathic bond with someone and then losing it. That would be traumatic, imho.

    lolol, Yes, I used fantasynamegenerator.com to get that one and wondered if it would be too... out there? And auto-correct has a field day with Iobat, let me tell you. :p Thanks for reading/enjoying and for the great feedback! [:D]


    I'm glad to have you laughing, earlybird. Vek might not have the opportunity to rescue anyone, but he'll certainly be in the way. :p

    By the way, I'm an early bird, too. I usually get everything done in the mornings - traffic seems to get worse as the day rolls along - so I can relax in the afternoon.


    Yeah, I was already pretty old (almost 30 :eek: ... :p) for a gamer when KotOR came out and I was honestly about done with gaming - I didn't have the reflexes or quick accessible short term memory to do all the button combos more action oriented games required, but when I saw KotOR... and it wasn't action and I could learn to swing a lightsaber, oh boy was I hooked. And thus began my love of RP Video games. Still, KotOR is my all time favorite. And the era became my favorite too, with all respect to the movies, cause they are awesome, too.

    Never say... never. Just from your feedback there, a devilishly decrepit plot bunny just bounced into my head. ;) Old Hoit's body may be gone, but... [face_worried] Oh, I fear I have said too much. "These are not the plot bunnies you are looking for..." waves hand absently

    Tech Babry is.. cute, in a sort of "I'll cut the heads off all your dolls if you break up with me and smile maniacally about it," kinda way. Ain't she the cutest?!?! :rolleyes: But yes, like so many of us (well, not me, I'm just a snark machine), she's also multi-dimensional and can make wise observations from time to time. :D
    They rely so heavily on the Force, they've forgotten what real, old fashioned doctoring's all about.

    Yes, Xova just kind of fell into being because of the challenge requirements. I wanted someone to be an antagonist to Vek's... sometime humorous, always annoying self. :p The Jedi masters are just too easy for that role, it had to be somebody below his rank to really ratchet up the tension and hilarity. :p

    Yeah, Xova's what we call 'eager', ain't she? Eager to embrace Vek's destruction! Mwuhahaha! :vader:

    lolol

    Trust me: I get more worried about her every time I write her. Thankfully, most of the time my characters just 'take over' the stories I'm writing, rather than me, as the author, continuing to force what happens. I feel like it makes everything come across as more 'realistic'? Heck if I know, I just type this crap out; it's not like I have to go and read it. :p

    Thanks! I really appreciate readers/commenters. And thanks for the awesome feedback. :)


    Thank you, Master. :) Vek is a born antagonist, or so every Master would tell you. :D I'm really glad he comes across as believable in this. And just you wait until the end when... well, I'll let the story speak for itself. :D Yes, Aloshla does seem to be smitten, doesn't she? Will Vek - or the Masters for that matter - be able to handle it?


    In the game, of course, you can have Revan be male or female, but canon (when Disney bought it they declined to keep it canonical, but I don't answer to the House of Mouse :p ) he is male and the Exile from KotOR II is canonically female. Revan hasn't been born yet, but Vek will meet him - FrAGs live a long time and Vek will live a very long time, indeed.


    All righty, thanks for all the views/reads/responses! Time for part 2 of 3 for Week 6's challenge:


    ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

    Aloshla knew a Jedi would never be able to properly reply to romantic feelings. Nonetheless, Knight Talis, no, Vek, had always treated her with respect and kindness, if from a distance. But, she’d observed, he kept everyone at arm’s length. Why was that? What hidden trauma had he undergone to be so aloof from everyone? She wished she could dissect him… tear him apart and rebuild him, the same man, just, closer, more able to be intimate.

    The image of him under her knife as she sliced and spliced… made her giggle slightly. She’d never really do it, but to dissect- Well, it was a thought to be examined and hidden from everyone else, at least.

    Quickly, she shook off the ruminations. She stepped off the lift to the main floor. There was her quarry: Padawan Xova, the schutta who treated Vek so rudely. “Padawan,” she called. The padawan was already headed to the auditorium to meet with the masters.

    The padawan stopped short, turned. “What is it, Tech? This had better be good.”

    Did she even realize her hand rested on the hilt of her lightsaber? Slapping a schutta was liable to mean trouble for Aloshla, even if she deserved it. For the moment, the tech subdued her urge, kept up the placating smile that kept the Jedi asleep.

    “There’s an urgent problem in your quarters,” Aloshla said. Her hand slid into her pocket. She had a remote keypad that linked into the environmental systems across the enclave. From memory, she keyed in a sequence as she spoke. “There’s been a leak from your fresher. I need you to come with me.”

    “I have an engagement with the council,” the padawan growled. “I don’t have time for you or your petty problems.”

    Smack-a-schutta was a game Aloshla would eagerly have engaged in right at that moment. Keeping her composure was simply a matter of gazing to the floor. Her hand in the pocket rapidly typed a succession of keys. Alarms began to blare across the enclave.

    Master Vizif Krat appeared at the entrance to the auditorium. “Xova, it seems as though there’s some issue; will you go with the Tech and see if you can be of some assistance before returning here?”

    “Yes, Master.” Now grumpier than a Mandalorian at a sewing exposition - a Weequay in a box of kittens, a Quarren in a flowery meadow - the padawan turned to glare at Aloshla. “Looks like you got what you wanted. This better be worth it.”

    If you enjoy wading through muck in your rubbers, Aloshla thought, happily picturing the Zabrak hip deep in waste the Jedi ignored. It almost made her smile on the outside, but that might have given away the game.

    ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

    Ryrbi meditated with his anger. How dare that human master of his treat him with such indifference. Wasn’t he good enough, or didn’t she trust him enough to bring him in on her plans? The Jedi were weak. She’d tried to teach him the opposite, and he’d even believed it for most of his young life. The Jedi took him off Cathar, after all, took him from the master who beat him, not because the master was strong, but because Ryrbi was weak.

    He wasn’t weak anymore.

    Once he reached into her mind and saw what she’d seen on Korriban… the ancient pyramids… monoliths, monuments to the great dark minds… He knew the Dark Side held the real power. Everything the Jedi taught about peace and mindfulness was because they were afraid of the truth. They wanted to smother with mind numbed numbers the true called of the Force.

    Power was its own reward. To get it showed real strength of character. What you did with it could hurt or help millions. What did it really matter which? There would be those who benefited one way or the other. So long as you came out on top, and were secure in your own mastery, what else mattered?

    His master was off to Coruscant to do… something. She hadn’t told him what. When she returned, she would see just how worthy he was. If the Jedi sent someone out here to the ancient grove to bring him back… well, they would be short another Jedi, wouldn’t they?

    They were back there, in the enclave, talking about him, weren’t they? His rictus grin was hungry. Send a padawan to return a padawan. The Jedi would be predictable. The Dark Side hovered over Xova. She would be easy to turn. The Jedi would want to set an example. Show her the consequences of turning to the Dark Side so she can correct the problem by killing him.

    In her dreams. He’d seen her spar. She worked hard. But his skills, especially now that the Dark Side was his ally, were far beyond hers. He leapt to his feet, red blade thrumming. A somersault, parry, he used the Force to throw a rock, hard enough to shatter against the ancient stone of a forgotten worship site.

    The Dark Side would always prevail. Satisfied, he extinguished his blade, knelt back to the stone. He was pleased with himself. When his master returned, he would show her his promise, the promise she dismissed. He would have his revenge, and would become the master. And then, he would have his own apprentice; one he could mould into a powerhouse he could unleash against his enemies. It would be glorious.
     
  14. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    Oh man, I would definitely cheer Aloshla on in any game of smack-a-schutta, especially with this particular schutta! :p I see that being a lowly tech she doesn't always get the respect she deserves from the Jedi denizens of the enclave, which is too bad—though it's notable that Vizif backs her up, albeit indirectly. I can't wait to see the look on Xova's face when she walks into the Problem Fresher! :D This Ryrbi fellow, however, worries me... I could see him being a real menace, but also nothing that our friends Vek and Aloshla can't handle. And, you know, to Xova's credit, I don't think she'd necessarily be quite as easy to turn to the dark side as he thinks. But I guess we'll see! Looking forward to more. :cool:
     
    earlybird-obi-wan and Vek Talis like this.
  15. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 2018
    The Jedi do seem to be presiding over the proverbial sinking ship, don't they? Insolent techs, padawans disappearing and falling left and right. Tsk, tsk. Perhaps a lack of proper leadership? Vandar aside, of course, but he can't do it all.

    Here's the last post. Now we get to see Vek getting his comeuppance for being the antagonist. :D Thanks everyone for reading!

    ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

    As Vek hurried out of the enclave, he felt Vizif’s presence, searching for him. Where are you, former padawan? her Force signature seemed to ask. It was best that he mask himself from her. She and the council were making a terrible mistake. Or else he was.

    He pushed that unwelcome thought back down from where it came. The Unifying Force was urging his feet forward, not back. Two heaving, sweaty figures, encased in black, stood over Vizif’s cooling corpse. If he went back now, or allowed his thoughts to wander… he shivered in the warm afternoon.

    Off to the west, the remains of the Rakatan Temple. One hundred sixty-some-odd years from now, give or take, Revan would rediscover it, and the relatively quiet Sith would erupt into fire and fury at his every command.

    War follows war. The cycle of arrogance continues, Vek thought. Humans always think, ‘This will never happen to me. I’m so much better than my predecessors.’ Ignorance. Idiots.

    But it wasn’t his place to ask the forgotten ruins be torn asunder. Wasn’t his place to go into space and use mass drivers to hurtle asteroids down to the spot and bury the temple so no one could rediscover it. The Unifying Force told him he was there to observe only and help once the crisis was already upon the galaxy. Madness. Even the Force was insane.

    Or was he the one?

    Again, that unwelcome thought had to be put back in its place. If he was the one who was mad, then it was someone else’s job to make sure he stayed shy of the events of the galaxy.

    At last, he arrived in a little gully, hidden from the ancient sacrificial platform the Rakatans used to slaughter a few slaves at random, just to keep the rest in line. It wasn’t only humans who were terrible at letting their egos get the better of them.

    As he’d hoped, Aloshla’s distraction had proven good. Xova hadn’t arrived yet. Ryrbi sat on his knees, deep in meditation. His anger rose and fell. Disappointment and despair followed. What is this dude’s damage, Vek thought as he watched the Force swirl around him. Vek kept up his walls so no one would sense his presence. Coming from somewhere else helped him do that.

    After only a few minutes, Xova appeared. She wasted no time, walking right up to the Cathar. “You need to return to the enclave and ask for forgiveness,” she said.

    At the last word, Ryrbi bristled. Something was at the forefront of his mind, but what?

    “That’s hilarrrious, especially coming frrrom you, Xova.” Ryrbi stood, his red blade activating a moment after hers. Red and blue collided, popped, crackled. Parry, thrust. Backflip, dodge, slash. Ataru, Shien, aggression was within both of them, angry and vicious.

    Power focused in around Ryrbi’s right hand - he was a lefty. Suddenly, the Dark Side broke the stalemate. Xova’s hand went to her throat; in her surprise she dropped her blade. Vek could feel her larynx closing off. He closed his eyes, picturing her esophagus. Deep down to the molecular level, he eased the constriction, urged oxygen through, all the while trying not to give away his presence.

    “You see the powerrr of the Darrrk Side,” Ryrbi purred. ==Forgive me, Master== the Cathar thought - it was powerful enough to break through to Vek’s mind. Ryrbi’s ‘damage’ was he feared he’d driven his master to the Dark Side.

    With more breath in her lungs than Ryrbi thought she had, Xova’s anger reached a boil. She bent to one knee, luring in her prey, pretending to gasp for air.

    The Unifying Force sent flashes through Vek’s mind. It was jumbled; he couldn’t process the images fast enough. He was saving Xova’s life, but at what cost? He couldn’t tell and it gnawed at him. Had he been foolish in helping her breathe?

    “Join me, and we can destrrroy our forrrmerrr masterrrs,” Ryrbi said. “I can sense the powerrr she hid frrrom me. Togetherrr, we can find it, turrrn it to ourrr advantage.”

    Vek reached out with the Force. He sent calming waves toward each padawan, trying to heal the rifts. Was it possible to influence them, even a little? He watched Ryrbi approach Xova, saw his hand reach out to clasp her on the shoulder. He saw it before it happened: she acted like lightning, scooping up her blade. It screeched and so did Ryrbi as blue sliced easily through his forearm. A blast from the Force knocked him back and Xova surged forward, white hot rage erupting from every pore.

    “Xova!”

    Before Vek could react - he was still trying to calm the situation - he watched Vizif and Vandar arrive on the scene. Vizif used the Force to move quickly between Xova and Ryrbi. The Cathar was cowering at the base of a pillar, holding the stump that was once his left arm.

    Vek snapped out of it and hurried over. He touched Ryrbi’s arm, dug deep, closed off severed veins and capillaries, encouraged platelets to arrive quickly and endorphins to ease the searing pain he could also feel in his own forearm.

    ==You didn’t turn your master, Ryrbi,== Vek soothed. ==Korriban did that; you are blameless.==

    Only then did he notice Xova hadn’t put her blade down. She glared at her master, her chest heaving with each breath. “He was going to kill me, Master… inside,” she screamed. “He touched me… that bastard put his hand on me just like-”

    The funeral flashed into Vek’s mind. That uncle of hers.

    Vizif rushed at her padawan. The blade clattered to the ground. Vizif wrapped her arms around Xova, who’d suddenly begun sobbing uncontrollably.

    “He- he touched me, master,” Xova said, blubbering at this point. “He touched me. Again and again. I was weak; I couldn’t stop him. I was so small.” Her words came quieter and softer. She was no longer speaking of padawan Ryrbi. Vek saw through the Force, as Vizif no doubt did as well.

    “It’s over now, Padawan,” Vizif said. “He can’t hurt you anymore.” She hugged her padawan tighter and Xova squeezed back.

    “I see you chose to try and prevent all this, Knight Talis.” Vandar had suddenly gotten beside Vek without him noticing. “Why did you think your judgement superior to that of the council?”

    Because except for you, the council is a pack of morons, with respect, Vek thought. Instead of speaking, he reached one of his hands from Ryrbi, who still whimpered, to Vandar. The Unifying Force flashed - Vek knew Vandar could catch brief glimpses through him.

    “Well, you were wrong, at least in part, Knight,” Vandar said when the vision passed. The diminutive master took a step back to regard padawan Ryrbi. “However, you were correct about Master Cloucor.”

    “Oh?” Vek was getting to his feet then, helping Ryrbi stand as well.

    “We received a message from Coruscant,” Vandar said. “Master Cloucor met with a Sith Master who was attempting to capture several members of the Jedi Council. Her plan was to lure the Masters out, one by one and help the Sith overpower them.”

    “Subtle. Like a brick to the face,” Vek said.

    “The Council sends its personal thanks to you, Knight Talis, for the message you sent warning them,” Vandar concluded.

    Vek cocked his head to the side, stared down at Vandar. “And you said I was partly wrong?”

    Vandar inclined his head to Vizif and Xova. “Your former master was well aware of Xova’s… erm, leanings. She knew you would try to interfere and the Living Force warned her about allowing you to succeed too much, for it might damage Xova’s long term resistance to the Dark Side.”

    “Huh,” Vek said as he scratched his shaved head.

    ==I know you meant well, Vek, and you did help in the short term, but you should have trusted me more. I know a long term gain is better than a short term one.== Vizif sounded a bit disappointed in him. At the moment, he couldn’t blame her; maybe he had misinterpreted the Unifying Force.

    ==The Unifying Force is far more complicated than even the most venerated masters can understand most of the time. Though I expect with time, you will be far better able to understand it than most.==

    ==That is why you are the Master, Master,== Vek replied, hanging his head, regret filling him.

    ==Thank you, Vek,== That wasn’t his former master in his head. ==I know what you were trying to do for me.==

    ==You’re welcome, Xova. And I’m sorry, for interfering and for… what you went through.==

    ~fini
     
  16. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 21, 2006
    Vek has quite an andventure with his interpretation of the unifying Force. Glad that all turned right for him Xova and Ryrbi.
    The tech and her manipulations. Hilarious to get her to clean the freshers
     
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  17. pronker

    pronker Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 28, 2007
    Well done, with many phrases to admire ...
    Hee, oh how often do parents begin 'why, you little xkei39kclalrk!' at something their offspring does ... o_O

    Dream on, bubba.

    Ahah, now this cements the timeline for me. [:D]
     
  18. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    Nice combination of action and introspection here! Vek had to make so many complicated decisions and judgments throughout this story, but even when the outcomes weren’t ideal his intentions never stopped being good—and it’s to Xova’s credit that she too could see that, and could appreciate it. Vek has that healer side of himself that informs pretty much everything he does. This last installment made for a satisfying wrap-up to the three-part story; nice work once again! =D=
     
  19. Chyntuck

    Chyntuck Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 11, 2014
    Sorry for dropping off the review train last week as you posted this. I was overrun by an army of rabid plot bunnies and went on a crazy "research" spree before writing 3000 words in two days :p so I fell behind on Vek's story.

    There's a lot to unpack here, with the abuse that Xova suffered as a child but also Ryrbi who mentions that his "master" beat him before he joined the Jedi Order. Vek has a valid point that something is extremely wrong with the Jedi Order of this period in that they fail to help these traumatised children cope (and actually traumatise them further, as we saw in the very first entry), and in this context it's unsurprising that he wants to interfere, but oh boy, does he blunder about in this story, even if his intentions are the best and he gets some things right.

    As a side note, it was nice to see a Cathar again :)

    However, the real standout for me was Aloshla; I just love her and I hope we'll get to see more. I like that she's cosplaying at being a Jedi, I love her crush on Vek and I adore her absolutely glorious plan to sidetrack Xova. It's just a different form of smack-a-schutta, and a far better one than the direct approach! Another side note, the fact that she gets treated like crap by the mighty Jedi of the enclave is another pretty good indicator that something is seriously wrong here, but she has creative ways of getting payback.

    A fantastic entry for the challenge with Vek as the antagonist, loved it!
     
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  20. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 2018
    You're glad? The sweat on Vek's forehead was glad for sure. :p Trouble with him is, he thinks he's more clever than he really is sometimes.

    Thank you. I'm starting to like Aloshla Babry more and more. She just flows out of me. What does that say about me? [face_worried]


    lolol, are you speaking from experience as the parent or the child there? o_O

    lol, too right. Some baddies, unfortunately, get the better of things. Others, thankfully, do not.

    Glad to help. I thought that line might make it a bit clearer. I believe the year I quote means from the beginning of the game events, which occur after Revan has turned Dark, gone on a rampage, been nearly slain, captured and had his/her mind remade to serve the Old Republic.

    Thanks for reading!


    Poor Vek and his aching brain. :p But yes, he's always trying to get something right. And maybe, with luck, he might actually achieve it. :p Vizif has the patience of a stone statue to deal with him. :p

    It's a wonder really why the Jedi never made him a healer. Maybe because they have too many snarktastic doctors already? Who can say? Thanks for reading, my Master!


    Nothing wrong with a little plot bunny fun. :D I look forward to reading your entry.

    To be clear, Ryrbi grew up on Cathar, so he was a slave. His slave master was who beat him, not the woman who turned to the Dark Side but was his Jedi master. :) Sometimes the Jedi can lack empathy and take a child away who's really not ready or willing - like Hoit from the first story - but other times, like with Xova or Ryrbi, the Jedi are a beacon of hope and freedom that are very happily accepted. :) Yin and Yang, as it were.

    It was certainly a blunder to not trust his former master. Hopefully it won't take its toll on Xova in the future... ;) Though perhaps we might see what comes of the future in another story. :p

    I thought I would trrreat you to a Catharrr charrracterrr since we both like cats so much. :)

    Yeah, she's got some interesting sides to her, doesn't she? She's a good kid, though, and she definitely gets her payback with the oh so superior Jedi. :p

    Thank you. :) It's great to have such gracious readers.



    And, here's today's challenge response. A bit too nice and lovey-dovey for my taste. [face_dunno]But what can you do. Too sugary. [face_sick]

    Title: Success
    Author: Vek Talis
    Length: Too short
    Timeframe: 171 years before KotOR 4127 BBY approx.
    Genre: Cute & Cuddly… blech [face_sick]
    Characters: Stevus (yes, another OC :p )
    Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars and never will.
    Note: This is for the Kessel Run Challenge. May the Force have mercy on my essence. Word count = 823
    • Write a story between 100 and 1,000 words from the perspective of a child. (For our purposes, a child is anyone 12 years old or younger – or whatever the developmental equivalent for your non-human characters happens to be.)
    • Word limit = 100-1,000 words



    ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

    I was in school in Bilbousa. My mom and dad were slaves. So I guess I was a slave too. I was learning how to run the filters so the swampy water could be drunk by us humans. My parents were slaves but they were slaves who knew stuff. The Hutts wouldn’t let them be hurt and they let me go to school to teach me things.

    Then the Jedi came to Nal Hutta. I don’t know why they came. No one wanted to talk to them. Everyone was afraid. The Hutts were afraid. I never saw a Hutt afraid of anything but another Hutt before. I tried to talk to one of the Jedi but they told me to shut up.

    This one Jedi she was kinda scary just a veil over where her eyes were supposed to be. But she made me feel happy and special. She looked at me across a crowd and I knew she was looking at me.

    The next day at class the other kids and the teachers were all sad. The Jedi were coming here everyone said. One of the teachers told us not to say anything and look angry when the Jedi came.

    The other children said the Jedi eat the kids they take away. They made me afraid. When the veiled lady and tall man and Zabrak girl came into the class I hid but I watched. Noxio the Hutt our teacher yelled at them then the Zabrak girl got mad and took out her laser sword but the veiled lady made her put it away. She was nice.

    I laughed when she talked so much she confused Noxio until he had to leave the room. I think I gave away my presence because the veiled lady looked right at me even though I was hiding. No one could see me but she did. She smiled big. I wasn’t afraid anymore.

    She said “You can come out. We won’t hurt you little one.”

    She asked me my name. Mom and dad always said don’t tell anyone your name but she was so nice and felt warm. I told her “I am Stevus who are you?”

    “I am called Vizif” she said. “These are my friends Vek and Xova.”

    I pointed at Xova. “You made Noxio scared with your laser sword.” She laughed.

    “How are you treated here Stevus?” Vizif asked me.

    “I am good.” I said. “I get food and water.”

    “But are you free?” Vek was tall. He smiled and leaned down to talk to me. He didn’t pat me on the head like one of the Hutts would. “Freedom is often prized among sentients young Stevus.”

    “What is a ‘sentient’?” I asked. The word was hard to say.

    “You are wise to ask questions. You and the Hutts all of us are sentient. It means we can think for ourselves.” When he stood back up he scratched his head and said “I’m not so sure Hutts are all that sentient but who knows they may surprise me and rub their backsides together enough that they make a spark.” I didn’t understand what he said.

    “Hush Vek” Vizif said. She reached her hand out to me. “Stevus I believe you can be a Jedi too. Would you like to come with us and learn to use the Force?”

    “Can I have a laser sword?” I asked.

    “In time.” Xova looked at Vizif then back to me. “At some point your master will stop torturing you and let you build one.”

    “Hush Xova. We do not torture padawans.” Vizif glared at Xova. But then she smiled at me again. “Your parents were gracious enough to allow us to take and train you.”

    “But only if you wish to come.” Vek seemed to make Vizif upset when he spoke but maybe he didn’t know that. “It is your choice. We have no jurisdiction in this place.”

    Before I could ask what that word meant Vizif reached out her hand to me again. “Your parents will be here shortly. They will tell you what I say is true.”

    And then mom and dad were there. Mom looked sad but the tears in her eyes were happy. I don’t know how I know that but they were glad tears. Dad was quiet but I could feel he was happy for me too. Maybe they wanted me to be free. It felt like that.

    “Go with the nice Jedi Stevus.” Mom sniffled and gave me my pack. It had my stuff in it. “They will take care of you and teach you the Force.”

    “Go son. Live a long time and prosper.” Dad was quiet but he wanted the best for me.

    “I will always love you Stevus.” Mom hugged me tight. She cried on my shoulder but she was happy. I didn’t understand.

    “Ok mom. Bye. I love you too.” And we went. The Jedi are nice.
     
  21. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 21, 2006
    Aww. Stevus sure is impressed by the Jedi and their words. Now he can be free or? Will he miss his parents? Will he become a great Jedi?
     
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  22. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    Oh, you did a very nice job with this prompt! I don’t think it’s too sugary at all—in fact, it’s more than a little bittersweet, because of what we hear from Stevus (no, not stevia, autocorrect!) about life as a slave to the Hutts, and then his decision to go with the Jedi. And of course Vizif, Vek, and Xova are immediately recognizable, even from the viewpoint of this youngling. I wonder how he’ll get on with them and how things will go for him—I guess that’s another bittersweet aspect too. Very good job with the youngling POV—see, you can too do it! :D
     
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  23. DLR001

    DLR001 Jedi Padawan star 1

    Registered:
    Feb 9, 2023
    Alright, long overdue, my review and feedback continues! Apologies for the wait, I've been dumping a lot of my time into the next post in Echoes and every time I don't my mind is screaming at me that I should.


    I had a similar, if inverted, experience! I played KotOR first when I was, gosh... 10? 11? And the second one first, to boot. Talk about confused! Republic soldiers, but no clone troopers, and who the heck is this Revan person? Why don't I have a lightsaber if I am a Jedi? Why do the Mandalorians look so funny? I lacked the reflexes at the time to master a lot of the more action oriented SW games that were on the market, so the quasi-turn-based approach also really appealed to me. I also lacked a lot of the acumen to truly appreciate the writing and world in front of me when I played, but I was sharp enough to realize it was something amazing. Every couple of years I revisit the games, to relive the story, and I have to agree - easily my favorite RPG as well!



    [​IMG]


    [​IMG]




    Oh. Oh. I'm married to that kind of cute.

    Danger, Knight Talis! Danger!

    [​IMG]



    Well, for a being a character whipped up for the prompts, I think she's splendid! A good foil, with more than enough backstory to make one invested in seeing where she goes. And aye, having someone on the ground, and with a connection to Vizif, makes it far better than the detached, aloof masters.



    I also go with a 'stream of consciousness'/'feel what they feel' approach, so I think I get what you're getting at with it being more realistic. You're doing a fine job, not to fret, Vek!



    You're most welcome my friend - keep writing awesome stories! Now, onto the further reviews I had promised...





    Drabble Triple Threat

    Juggernaut

    Oh man, Xova got humbled a bit here! Hopefully some good character development on her part - though I feel it will take a lot more than getting trounced by Vek to get her truly where she needs to be. Also, excellent word economy! You managed to keep the fight exciting and clear, even with the word limit.

    Shepherd


    Yes, Xova - they are weak. Free yourself from the shackles of Coruscant's corpulen--

    Ahem.

    Another great piece! A little bit of everything here, but I am enjoying the portals into Xova's mind and reasoning.

    Undertaker

    That poor young woman. Hopefully the Force does shred his soul into meal worms - or Xova acquires the power to do it herself.

    But such anger - such hurt. It makes me wonder...

    Antagonism

    Oh this is some great stuff - an errant Cathar padawan, the Ancient Grove - I am loving this.


    Wow.

    I know she didn't just talk to my boy Vek like that. No wonder people join the Sith!

    Also, Babry caught midway through playing dress up was ridiculously cute. Fantastic way to build on their budding connection! It warms my warped heart.


    [​IMG]

    Alright, forget Xova, I'm worried about Vek now lmao


    Don't judge him, he's got a lot going on right now and just needs time to think.

    Seriously though, I love these little comparisons! Smack-a-Schutta is also delightful, and a phrase I may shamelessly steal for one mouthy Twi'lek - if you don't mind, of course.

    And the confrontation! I rather like what you did with Ryrbi's voice - I struggle with writing accents and dialects - I can hear him in my mind all the more, though admittedly he sounds like the Khajiit VA from Morrowind.

    Ryrbi's maiming was as visceral as it was sudden - Xova's sudden surge in power was a delight to behold! Though, he emotional breakdown afterwards was, of course, biting as well. The poor girl, I really hope that Vizif, or someone at the Enclave, can help her talk through this before any more wayward padawans lose their arms! But man, what a triple piece, Vek as antagonist was a departure, but a welcome one! I wasn't expecting Xova's realization, or humility - perhaps the rift will begin to be mended? I am eager to see more!

    Also, I only realize as I got done with a lot of my rereads - I really enjoy how you describe force healing, and it will likely heavily influence it in my own work.

    Success

    Straightforward, but heartwarming! As @Findswoman said, not only are the three instantly recognizable, but the whole piece does have a bittersweet air to it, not simply for the conditions of Stevus and his family's bondage, but for the separation - even if it meant that he would have a chance at a better life than any that awaited him on Nal Hutta. Regardless, an enjoyable, and very believable, piece from the perspective of young Stevus! I hope we'll see some more of him in the future.





    And on that note, I hope to see more of your work in the future @Vek Talis! I'm getting rather invested in this KotOR prequel setting, and I'd love to see where it goes from here!
     
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  24. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 2018
    Stevus just might stick around, since everyone seems to like him so much. :D It's getting to be a circus - all these OCs around. But I can handle it. Can I? Oh, I don't think so. Maybe. 8-}

    And Stevus (my autocorrect wants to say 'stoves' :p ) is an uncommon slave, since his parents are important. That says a lot about the state of slavery in Hutt space, doesn't it?

    Hard to miss Moe, Larry and Curly, isn't it? Uh, I mean the other trio. Yeah, that's what I meant. o_O

    I reckon it's getting crowded at the Jedi enclave on Dantooine. :p Maybe Aloshla will dissect the cute wittle guy? [face_mischief] [face_tee_hee] [face_worried]

    All I have to do is think like a 6 year old. Wait, don't I already do that? No, don't answer that, Master. :rolleyes:

    No worries. I look forward to the next post in your story, too!

    Oh, you started with II? Nice. I really thought they should have turned the 'new' HKs into HK-74 instead of 50, you know, in keeping with the Kalashnikov hint in HK-47 (AK-47), but what can you do? [face_dunno] So I must be almost twice your age, then, lol. Grampa feels a back cramp coming on all of a sudden. :p I was mixed about the second one because it was so rushed they never really got to complete a lot of it, unfortunately. And that same company, Obsidian, would later make imho the best Fallout game: New Vegas, so I know they had it in them if they hadn't been rushed. (and I know they were rushed with New Vegas, too, they'd just learned a lot from KotOR II in how to get things done on the fly).




    [​IMG]


    [​IMG]


    Heh heh - two of my favorite actors for their amazing abilities in manifesting the Dark Side. Nicholson should definitely have played a Sith Lord.


    [​IMG]
    lmao Good luck to you and I hope you don't come home your own home-cooked pet-in-a-pot. :p



    She will get there in time... or else turn into a fine Sith. ;)


    Heh. Heh. You are coming along nicely. My. Young. Apprentice. :emperor:

    Portals burrowing in like a brain fungus, leaving nothing but charred synapses in their wakes? o_O

    Yeah, people are people even in the GFFA. Some are cute and cuddly and warm and fuzzy... then there's the other 90% of 'em. [face_shhh] Not saying which group you and I belong to... nudge nudge ;)

    I thought you might like that bit. The more things change, the more they stay the same. :D

    Master Nur'rovo doesn't appreciate snark. Snark leads to anger, and anger... to suffering!

    How many of us can say we didn't go play dress up at one point or another? Just maybe not at 20 or so. :p

    She slices, she dices, she juliennes!

    Just words my friend. Use 'em or lose 'em. :p

    Morrowind was my favorite Elder Scrolls. I found the environment stark - I love stark beauty. So empty and unique.

    As for writing accents, sound it out in your head and spell it out phonetically. Dialogue should sound like it sounds and forget about spelling.

    Delightful, yessss. Feel your anger surround you. It gives you focus.

    Wouldn't that be funny, lol. A whole gaggle of padawans waddling down the path from the place civilians park their speeder, armless like a bunch of penguins! [face_rofl]

    Xova was terribly hurt and that fuel will drive her to become the strongest Sith in- er, she will overcome her anger and move beyond it. [face_plain]

    Thanks. I imagined Force healing to be more about concentration and visualization - seeing the wounds as the Force engages with them.

    Stevus, I reckon, will return at some point. Maybe he and Hoit can have a play date. [face_devil] "Why are you talking to the wall, Stevus." "I'm not talking to the wall; I'm talking to my special friend, Hoit." [face_skull]

    Well, it goes to Loss, set about a year after the first Kessel Run post. :D

    Thanks for the comprehensive review, @DLR001 ! I really appreciate the feedback.

    Thanks to everyone who reads. :)
     
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2023
  25. pronker

    pronker Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 28, 2007
    Little Stevus "reads" seven or eight? I'm guessing here ...
    he's seen a lot and 'not being hurt' is high up on his life goals ... =((

    The deciding question!:D

    And so they are; he's perceptive enough to pick up on the general timbre of their voices, their auras, or whatever. He'll go far![face_alien]