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Beyond - Legends "A Moment" Luke and Ben Skywalker Vig - Thanks!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by ginchy, Mar 15, 2007.

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  1. ginchy

    ginchy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 25, 2005
    Title: A Moment
    Author: ginchy
    Characters: Luke, Ben, bit of Mara
    Notes: I was working on the next update for ?To Overcome? when, I kid you not, Luke Skywalker himself clubbed me over the head and said I had to write this. It was so vivid, the idea for this, and it just came pouring right out of me. I think Ben is about 11 or 12 here, and I believe at that time that the Skywalkers? were living on Ossus at the Jedi Temple. Any small mistakes in timeline, let me know, I always have trouble keeping all that straight! I really love this little vig. Hope you all will, too!


    ?Morning, son,? Luke Skywalker said, waiting for Ben to drop his leg from it?s resting position against the wall and stepping into the kitchen around the chair Ben occupied in the doorway.

    The holovid was blasting, but even in the doorway of the kitchen Ben had to crane his neck to watch it. Luke smiled at him. ?Mom bust you for eating in the living room again??

    Ben sighed. ?Yeah, it was dumb. I just dropped a few crumbs on the carpet, not a galactic incident.?

    Luke pressed his lips together to squash a grin. ?You know your mom, [i]Cleanliness leads to order[/i]??

    ?[i]And with order there can be no chaos[/i],? Ben finished through a bite of his morning cereal. ?I know, Dad.?

    Grabbing his own bowl of cereal and a cup of caf, Luke chuckled. ?She does enjoy that phrase, huh??

    ?Yeah,? Ben agreed, standing and grabbing the box out of his father?s hand. He quickly refilled his bowl and sat craning his neck again as the music on the holovid changed into something with a faster pace. Without turning around, he managed to spoon sugar out of a container on the counter and heap it in his bowl.

    Luke took a bite of his own un-sugared cereal and made a face. ?Mom on her fiber kick again??

    Ben grunted. ?Not so bad with a lot of sugar.?

    ?I?ll take your word for it,? Luke said, heroically downing another bite. ?What are you watching?? he asked absently, tapping his datapad to upload his morning report and daily schedule. ?I know you don?t have class until this evening.?

    ?What?? Ben turned and looked at his father for a moment, before craning his neck towards the holovid again. ?Oh, I don?t know. Something.?

    ?Something that must be pretty interesting,? Luke said, eyes glancing over his list of meetings. A light day, only four.

    Ben didn?t answer and Luke looked up to find his son still spread out in his odd position, foot back up on the wall, balancing out his craned head, it seemed. He was paying very close attention to the program, so Luke let it drop, opening a document on his datapad to type out some ideas for the meetings scheduled later in the day.

    A message popped up on the screen from Mara, filling him in on her classes and meetings for the day, asking that he make sure Ben was set for his meditation class in the late afternoon, his least favorite. ?[i]Skywalker impatience[/i],? she typed. ?[i]Can?t sit still[/i].? Luke smiled. ?[i]Jade stubbornness[/i],? he countered. ?Won?t [i]sit still[/i].? ?[i]Hm. Class starting. Stop distracting me, Farmboy,[/i]? she responded and Luke?s smile grew. ?Mom?s out most of the day,? he said aloud, closing their conversation window.

    The boy still didn?t answer, and Luke raised his eyes to see him pouring even more cereal into his bowl. Ben seemed in that moment to be all feet, legs, arms, and mouth as he reclined in his seat, shoveling in more food. With each passing day, as his body slimmed from that of a boy?s into a man, he looked more and more like Luke, red hair and Mara?s nose notwithstanding. When Luke looked at him he could see himself and Mara, but also things uniquely Ben, the way he held himself, the part in his hair, the small mole near his eyebrow. But seeing himself in Ben was easy, the chin, the eyes, the same look of determination that faced himself in the mirror every morning. It often made him wonder what Aunt Beru had seen when she looked at him. His own father? Or perhaps even his mother? He would nev>
     
  2. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    What a wonderful, warm moment between father and son! [face_love] I'm now just a pile of mushy goo (it'll be hard to clean house today, thank goodness!)

    A message popped up on the screen from Mara, filling him in on her classes and meetings for the day, asking that he make sure Ben was set for his meditation class in the late afternoon, his least favorite. ?Skywalker impatience,? she typed. ?Can?t sit still.? Luke smiled. ?Jade stubbornness,? he countered. ?Won?t sit still.? ?Hm. Class starting. Stop distracting me, Farmboy,? she responded and Luke?s smile grew. ?Mom?s out most of the day,? he said aloud, closing their conversation window.

    LOVED IT! [face_laugh]

    Really beautiful. =D=
     
  3. DARTH_MU

    DARTH_MU Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 9, 2005
    Hm... Vong Invaders, eh?
    FPS or RTS or RPG?
    alias JK or EAW or KOTOR?
     
  4. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Sweet and touching. :)
    Now go back to To Overcome. :D ;)
    Ben's at a tough age to capture, all jumbled emotions, and the family situation isn't helping. But you got it just right. How wonderful of Luke to "get back on track" like he did. It's moments like these that'll be priceless treasure to them both later. :)
    You're the tops, ginchy for sharing this with us!! :) [:D]
     
  5. Jedi-2B

    Jedi-2B Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    Great father/son bonding moment. They need to have a day like this now more than ever.
     
  6. Darth_Marrs

    Darth_Marrs Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 24, 2006
    Great story--very touching. Sometimes after 48-72 hours of non-stop jabbering, singing, screaming and shouting from my 4 year old, when I'm numb and I just want him to be quiet, I'll think about this story.

    Then I'll tell him to be quiet anyway. Or we'll play Rogue Squadron together when we're older.



     
  7. morrison85

    morrison85 Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    May 13, 2005
    A very beautiful Story :D
     
  8. Jade_Pilot

    Jade_Pilot Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 10, 2005
    Oh ginchy lee! I'm so glad you listened to Luke!!!! ;) This is wonderful and just the perfect father son moment. I'm personally adopting this as canon!

    Bravo! =D=
     
  9. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Wonderful story! (And you know I'm a sucker for playing Battlefront with my own kids.)

    I like how you captured that balance that Ben is feeling, where he wants so much to have his father's attention but he is astute enough to know how important his father is. Luke is wise to cultivate the bond between them. As he points out, that very relationship is the reason why Luke does what he does.

    And Mara is a tornado, of course, but she is trying to show her love for her family in her own way, too.

    Terrific little viggie. Nice job![:D]
     
  10. MirandaFair

    MirandaFair Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 13, 2005
    I love this insightful look into Luke and Ben's relationship. [:D] My muse is curious as to what your muse eats for breakfast, ginchy. I say you're munching on the breakfast of champions. [face_thinking] Seriously, there are some authors out there that can whip up great vignettes in a couple hours time and the work is just seamless and flows so beautifully. I'm in awe of that. @};-

    The connection between Luke and Ben just pains my heart because Luke never had any of these talks with his own father. It's wonderful that he has grown from naive farmboy to supportive father. The idea of Mara having only health-conscious snacks in the kitchen or her fusing with Ben's crumbs is too cute and very motherly. Yes, it's great seeing two adventurers like Luke and Mara have these family moments.

    I found the ending bittersweet because we know the profics hardly ever address the times where there's so much that can be done with these characters.

    Playing the game long into the afternoon, did he dare hope things were finally on the right track?

    Aww, Luke! We're hoping right along with you!!! [face_good_luck]

    Lovely work, ginchy-twin. [:D]
     
  11. SilSolo

    SilSolo Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Mar 5, 2004
    wonderful family moment
     
  12. Blue_Milkshake

    Blue_Milkshake Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 18, 2005
    This was wonderful, fabulous, amazing!!! I love how Mara blamed Luke for her sending him that message. And I loved how Luke had a private stash of snack foods. And Ben with all the eating, and the videos, loud music, games and limbs all out of proportion. They're a real family. Thank you for sharing this with us!!!
     
  13. Jedi Trace

    Jedi Trace SouthEast RSA star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Dec 15, 1999
    [:D][:D] this story so much!! [:D][:D]

    It's perfect! I'm so glad that you listened to the Master and wrote it. [face_love] Stangit, this is how it SHOULD be!

    Luke was wonderful, but your almost-teenage Ben stole the show - a brilliant mixture of pre-teen childishness with emerging maturity.

    LOVED every word of it! @};-


    [:D]

     
  14. verybusy

    verybusy Jedi Knight star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 18, 2006
    [:D] Just perfect![:D]

    cheers,

    VeryBusy
     
  15. ginchy

    ginchy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 25, 2005
    VaderLVR64: I'm now just a pile of mushy goo (it'll be hard to clean house today, thank goodness!) You?re welcome. ;) Thank you so much, I?m so glad you enjoyed my foray into writing about fathers and sons. And you picked out my most favorite part to highlight! :D

    DARTH_MU: Well, I thought it might a MMORPG like SWG but then I think Luke might not like the Jedi in it, but he could probably take out a few SD's with his modded A-Wing. [face_laugh] Okay, really--all of that went right over my head. RedGold helped me construct an answer. ;) Thanks for peeking in.

    Jade_eyes: *jumps back to ?To Overcome?* ;) You're the tops, ginchy for sharing this with us!! Thank you so much, gal!! You?re a terrific lady, yourself! Thanks for reading. :D

    Jedi-2B: I SO agree! Thanks so much for reading, gal!

    Darth_Marrs: Thank you! Hug your son close, and surely play those games together! :D

    morrison85: Thank you! :D

    Jade_Pilot: Hey, gal! Oh ginchy lee! I'm so glad you listened to Luke!!!! This is wonderful and just the perfect father son moment. I'm personally adopting this as canon! WOW! That?s awesome, lady, I?m just grinning ear to ear! Thank you! :D

    divapilot: Thank you, lady! I?m so glad you got everything I was trying to say and bring across with this fic. It meant a lot to me, and I?m glad that came through. And, yup, Mara is a tornado, that is correct! LOL

    MirandaFair: Hey, twinnie!! [face_laugh] What does my Muse eat for breakfast? Well, in this case, no breakfast was involved, just Master Skywalker telling me to write a fic for him gosh-darn-it! ;) The connection between Luke and Ben just pains my heart because Luke never had any of these talks with his own father. It's wonderful that he has grown from naive farmboy to supportive father. The idea of Mara having only health-conscious snacks in the kitchen or her fusing with Ben's crumbs is too cute and very motherly. Yes, it's great seeing two adventurers like Luke and Mara have these family moments. And that?s exactly what I wanted to show. Luke had a home life, but not with the father he longed for. Mara didn?t have any type of family stability, so the fact that they have been able to build something like that together, is extraordinary. And Ben? what it must be like to be Luke Skywalker?s child. I?m glad my Luke came off as a great dad. And you are always so great to me, twin. Thank you! [:D]

    SilSolo: Thanks! :)

    Blue_Milkshake: They're a real family. Yes, that?s exactly what I was trying to show and I?m so glad it came through, especially since I do not yet have children. I modeled Ben after one of my cousins. Thank you so, so much for your words of encouragement, and praise. There?s a huge grin on my face! [:D]

    Jedi Trace: How could I not listen to the master? ;) Thank you, girl. Writing Ben was an adventure--I based him on my cousin, but it was still hard to listen for his voice. I?m so glad he game through as a good mix of childishness and maturity, exactly what I was hoping for. Thank you!! [:D]

    verybusy: Thank you so much! :D

    This piece meant a lot to me personally. THANK YOU to everyone who read! [:D]
     
  16. ginchy

    ginchy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 25, 2005
    Thank you all so much for the qualifying nom for Luke's characterization in this fic. I really felt compelled to write this one for him, if that makes any sense, so this has really made my day! Thank you! [:D]
     
  17. Master_M_Sky

    Master_M_Sky Jedi Master star 1

    Registered:
    Aug 3, 2006
    Ahh, how did I miss this?!?!

    You truly are the Queen of Mush, ginchy. [face_love][face_love][:D]

    Love it!
     
  18. Knight_Aragorn

    Knight_Aragorn Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2003
    This is beautiful. :D Wish we had more Luke and Ben bonding in the novels, or really *any* sort of real interaction between them at all. Luke felt spot-on, and, living with one teenage and one near-teenage sibling, I can say that Ben's characterisation was very good as well. Ah, the music and the TV and the mood swings... :p

    Great work. :D

     
  19. ginchy

    ginchy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 25, 2005
    Thank you SO much for the Canon Male (Luke Skywalker) on this fic! [:D] I'm blown away because this fic meant so much to me. Thank you!

    Master_M_Sky: Ah, thank you! :D I might have to put that in my sig. ;)

    Knight_Aragorn: Thank you so much! I wish there were more (any, like you say) interaction between Luke and Ben in profic. Isn't SW the story of a father and a son??

     
  20. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Congratulations on your award for Best Canon (Male) in the Beyond Awards! You deserve it!

    =D= =D= =D=
     
  21. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    ginchy posted: Thank you SO much for the Canon Male (Luke Skywalker) on this fic!


    Y'know, your Luke is always droolicious. :) [face_love] :*
     
  22. MirandaFair

    MirandaFair Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 13, 2005
    Congratulations on your award for Best Canon Interp. Male...the one and only Luke Skywalker. You know that Farmboy very well.

    So proud and happy for you, Twin! [:D]
     
  23. RebelMom

    RebelMom Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 20, 2000
    I remember reading this, but I didn't realize I hadn't posted a comment. Forgive me. [face_praying]

    Congratulations on your award. =D= Luke's characterization was on spot.
     
  24. redtenko

    redtenko Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Nov 7, 2006
    congradulations on the award! the story's great, you deserve it! [:D] =D=
     
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