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Saga - ST A Whisper From The Dark Short One-Shot Rey, Kylo Ren

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by NobodyIX, Feb 21, 2018.

  1. NobodyIX

    NobodyIX Jedi Padawan star 1

    Feb 19, 2018
    Title: A Whisper From The Dark

    Characters: Rey, Kylo Ren, OC

    Summary: Rey meets her first student. It will not go as planned.

    Notes: I wrote a few things under another pen name over, ahem... over ten years ago. I recently saw The Last Jedi and was blown away. Enjoyed all the characters especially Luke and Leia. Too much to say here! But once again I'm enjoying reading and sharing the magic.

    Rey felt the cold wind whip against her face as the main bay doors opened. She squinted under her hood into the bright sun. A small transport ship lowered its landing gear and gracefully set down on the dock. Several pilots near her stopped and stared. "Who do you think it is?" one asked. The other gave a knowing look. "A force user." They exchanged glances as Rey weaved around several x-wings for a closer look.

    The welcome party was already waiting at the base of the ship. Commander Sim with her formal white robes and two other main officers waited below for their new guest. It was beginning. And there would be more to follow. Rey drew in a deep breath as the hangar door closed with finality. The time had come but the truth was far more tenuous. Deep down Rey knew she was no teacher.

    The hatch door slid open. A young Trellen boy stepped out, looking bewildered as he gazed out at the cavernous bay. Row after row of ships ready to fly to battle. She reached her mind out to him and the moment hit her like a punch to the gut.



    A red lightsaber illuminated the hazy smoke behind the boy. She called out but he couldn't hear her. Before she could take a step, the saber came up and impaled his back. He fell forward, face registering shock then raw fear. Blood covered her hands as she rocked him. Lifeless eyes stared up into a hazy void.

    She was left breathless, watching the boy walk down the ramp and shake Commander Sim's hand. "It's only a vision," she told herself. "It means nothing." But her hands were trembling. She closed her eyes to steady herself. Would his death come from her own incompetence?

    A familiar presence lingered on the periphery of her mind. He was always there and she worked hard to keep him out. But she was not balanced and his voice came to her. Kylo Ren spoke to her from the darkness. "It is nothing. It's useless. The Jedi and the Sith are done. There is only order and the strength to keep it."

    "Shut up," she said to nothing and covered her ears. "Shut up." She could not afford to open that channel ever again. Rey opened her eyes, and willed herself to the transport.

    "And this is Rey," Commander Sim said, turning with a smile. The boy swallowed, wide eyes regarding Rey. Did he sense her hesitation? She wondered as she sized him up. He had been torn from his family. For what?

    Rey extended her hand to the boy. He smiled at her with his jagged teeth as he gripped her hand. The touch sparked the vision. The red saber hovering towards his back, ready to strike. She resisted the urge to run. The boy didn't seem to notice. "I'm Baren." he said and squeezed her hand a little too hard. The vision lingered as he let up and she gazed into those innocent brown eyes.

    "I've been expecting you.". And dreading you. The Resistance needed more Force users. The only way to defeat Kylo Ren and his growing following. What was he teaching them? The unbidden voice came again as if he were whispering in her ear. "You are leading him to destruction Rey. Useless. Futile death."

    She chided herself at letting Kylo Ren into her mind again. . She would find a way to block him if it was the last thing she did. But now there was a more pressing matter. The one thought that haunted her waking moments and kept her up at night. "I am no teacher,"

    "I'm Rey. Welcome Baren." The Commander watched them both hopefully. A hope Rey wished she could feel. All she had now was an uneasy dread.
    Last edited: Feb 21, 2018
  2. brodiew

    brodiew Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Oct 11, 2005
    Hello NobodyIX! This a well written look into Rey's fears about being a teacher of new Jedi. funny that Kylo's voice is in her head whether she opens the channel or not. Nicely done.
    AzureAngel2 and NobodyIX like this.
  3. NobodyIX

    NobodyIX Jedi Padawan star 1

    Feb 19, 2018
    Brodiew- Thank you so much for reading! [:D] I really like the connection between Rey and Kylo Ren in The Last Jedi. That was so intriguing. I have a feeling they are both terrified at the prospect of more Force Users. The connection they have may be too strong to resist for either of them, even when the stakes are high.
    AzureAngel2 likes this.
  4. Ewok Poet

    Ewok Poet Force Ghost star 6

    Jul 31, 2014
    Welcome back to the board! :)

    This was masterful. There's this duality, ambiguity in everything that happens here and it's such a short vignette. Looks like both Rey and Kylo, in a way, want something different to happen, yet they dread changes. And this poor young being doesn't even know that he's stuck between a rock and a hard place...yet.
  5. NobodyIX

    NobodyIX Jedi Padawan star 1

    Feb 19, 2018
    Thank you Ewok Poet! [face_love] It's good to be back, there are so many talented authors here!. I forgot to put 'angst' in the beginning.:p I will get you some chocolate for getting through it. Thanks for reading! :D
  6. Ewok Poet

    Ewok Poet Force Ghost star 6

    Jul 31, 2014
    No. Pepsi Max. :p
    AzureAngel2 and NobodyIX like this.
  7. gizkaspice

    gizkaspice Jedi Master star 4

    Nov 27, 2013
    This is a very interesting start and explores the connection between them quite well. It’s very interesting to see Rey being the fearful teacher for a new group of force users.
    AzureAngel2, NobodyIX and Ewok Poet like this.
  8. NobodyIX

    NobodyIX Jedi Padawan star 1

    Feb 19, 2018
    Ewok Poet- :D You drive a hard bargain...Ok Pepsi Max it is and we'll add a little side dish with ANGRY MACETM. sprinkles.

    giszkaspice- Thank you for reading [:D] I'd love to see a fic exploring more of that connection between Rey and Kylo. I'm sure they'll do it in episode IX but I can't wait that long!
    AzureAngel2 and Ewok Poet like this.
  9. Sara_Kenobi

    Sara_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master star 7

    Sep 21, 2000
    You really get into the story well! Great one-shot! =D=
  10. Chyntuck

    Chyntuck Force Ghost star 5

    Jul 11, 2014
    This is a very nice little story! I like this portrait of Rey struggling with the idea that now she has to teach others but that she doesn't know how – and, more generally, she doesn't entirely control her ability with the Force. The fact that she has to make a conscious effort to shut Kylo Ren out was such a good way to show her weaknesses in this area. Which, incidentally, raises the question of why she has this vision: is it a vision of the future? or an expression of her fears based on the Force-flashback of TFA? or is it Kylo planting it in her mind? You did a great job of preserving the ambiguity here.

    Welcome back to the boards, I'm looking forward to reading more of your stories!
  11. NobodyIX

    NobodyIX Jedi Padawan star 1

    Feb 19, 2018
    Sara_Kenobi- Thanks for reading![face_love]

    Chyntuck- I think it will be interesting to see Rey trying to pick up the pieces of the Jedi without any formal training. I think she is going to have a lot of blind spots when it comes to the Force. Those visions that the Jedi have seem to be more destructive than helpful. (I was thinking of Luke's vision of Han and Leia suffering in Empire.) The link between Rey and Kylo opens up so many possibilities for story lines. Too many plot porgs squawking in my ear.:p
    AzureAngel2, Ewok Poet and Chyntuck like this.
  12. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Aug 31, 2004
    Terrific sense of an inner struggle against her own self-doubts as an instructor and against the vision, whether externally planted or involuntarily reflecting the future :eek: =D=

    There is a connection between Ren and Rey which she is uncomfortable with but does not have the strength or ability to break free of. [face_thinking]
    AzureAngel2, NobodyIX and Ewok Poet like this.
  13. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005
    Very well written and intense. ^:)^=D=

    When I recently read the book "The Witch of Portobello" by Paulo Coelho. As a review from Harper Collins Publishers says, "How do we find the courage to always be true to ourselves—even if we are unsure of who we are?"

    If Rey is to become a teacher for a new generation of Jedi knights, she would be wise to go into a different new direction than the old Jedi order. With no hybris. Life long learning also counts for teachers, too. Nobody is perfect.

    As for Kylo and his opinion: he should walk new ways, too. For he always sounds like a very manipulative Sith. And I thought he wanted to wander totally new paths.

  14. madman007

    madman007 Jedi Master star 4

    Aug 22, 2007
    Excellent beginning.

    We seem to have similar subjects in our current stories with different execution.

    That vision was intense. And similar to Luke's reality when he confronted Kylo Ren but backed out too late. Maybe he had a similar vision and Rey thinks so too.

    Love the inner voice you give Rey. "I've been expecting you." And dreading you. That was quite effective.

    Remember, the connection between Rey and Ren was created by Snoke. Somehow, that connection lingers even after Snoke is gone. You went in the direction that she fears that connection, which is probably more believeable than my take of Rey actually instigatting it herself.

    Interested to see more of where you take this.
    NobodyIX and Ewok Poet like this.
  15. NobodyIX

    NobodyIX Jedi Padawan star 1

    Feb 19, 2018
    @WarmNyota_SweetAyesha - Thank you for reading! [:D] I think when Rey is stressed it would be more difficult to block the connection with Kylo. And Kylo is being manipulative. I think Rey will be an excellent teacher. I'd love to write more and explore the connection between Kylo and Rey.

    @AzureAngel2 -
    I think that is so true. It's so hard to find courage when we embark on the unknown. She is going to have to find a resounding strength within to complete this task. And Kylo Ren, I'd like to see him walk a new path too. He is being manipulative here, and I think he may start out that way, but he would see that ultimately it does not get him what he wants. Thank you so much for stopping in! :D

    @madman007 - I'm really enjoying your epic! It seems like these visions are almost always self fulfilling prophecies. I like your take that Rey would instigate the connection herself. There's so many ways to run with this, and I'm enjoying them all. It would be fun to continue this and explore the reluctant connection. I really appreciate you reading!