main
side
curve
  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Saga Acoustic Light : the Diary of Syfer Helis (Diary Challenge) [Updated! 1/23]

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by KrystalBlaze, Jan 1, 2007.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. KrystalBlaze

    KrystalBlaze Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Aug 3, 2002
    Acoustic Light: the Diary of Syfer Helis
    by KrystalBlaze




    [b]Summary:[/b] Syfer Helis, sixteen, keeps a diary/journal/datapad/memorystick of his most ambitious Padawan year.
    [b]Genre[/b]: Humor, angst, action
    [b]Timeframe[/b]: erm... sometime between TPM and AOTC
    [b]Characters[/b]: Syfer Helis, Njuan Tali
    [b]Notes[/b]: Written for the Diary Challenge. The two starring OCs are featured in another fic of mine- link is in bio.
    [b]Disclaimer[/b]: Belongs to the Grand Marshall.

    [hr]

    [b]Entry One[/b]

    Dear Diary?

    No, that sounds funny. Dear Journal, maybe? Do I have to call you something? Wait? are you even a you? Or a thing? Or just a useless datapad?

    I don?t think I?ll call this datapad anything. It won?t have a name. It?ll just be my companion, my partner in crime. I?ll let you know everything, but please don?t expect a name. I?m not that creative ? in fact, I?m not creative at all. A diary isn?t even my idea. Why am I even keeping you?

    Well, I guess that?s Cam?s fault. She always thought it would be nice to keep a record of everything we do, everyday, so we could look back over it later. When she?s a master, she wants to look back to when she was Padawan and remember what her master taught her, so she won?t forget. I think it?s just an excuse so she can write ? unlike me, Cam is very creative with her words.

    Either way, she thought it would be fun to keep this diary ? journal? ? to look back on. I am not opposed to keeping one ? I just don?t know if I?ll always remember to write in it. I have trouble enough keeping up with all my studies, homework, missions, Master Tali?s mood swings? I sometimes forget to shower. How does she expect me to keep this thing updated?

    I mean, I?m not opposed to trying. I?ll try, dammit ? just don?t know if I can keep it up. And what if Master Tali finds it? He might decide somehow it?s against the Code and take it away and Force knows what happens if he reads it. I?ll have to keep it password protected. I don?t want him looking into my darkest thoughts, my most private memories, the things I wouldn?t want him to know?

    Well, I guess that would be bad. He?s my Master, so I guess he should know some of them. I might have to lock the ones where he?s mentioned. It?s not a very pleasant occurrence when he gets angry. Master Tali is almost the perfect Jedi, but sometimes he is known to throw things in heavy frustration ? which is what he calls his temper tantrums. I know better, though.

    So, Cam, here?s my first entry. I might even let you read it so you can see how I?m doing. Or maybe just for throws. Who knows? I don?t.

    So? that?s that, diary/journal/datapad/memorystick thing. Yeah. That?s what I?ll call you. Yeah, you.
     
  2. Healer_Leona

    Healer_Leona Squirrel Wrangler of Fun & Games star 9 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jul 7, 2000
    Well, I guess that would be bad. He?s my Master, so I guess he should know some of them. I might have to lock the ones where he?s mentioned. It?s not a very pleasant occurrence when he gets angry. Master Tali is almost the perfect Jedi, but sometimes he is known to throw things in heavy frustration ? which is what he calls his temper tantrums. I know better, though.


    Hmm, why does it sound like more than simple tantrums? o_O

    Nice start. Can I ask for PM updates?
     
  3. Star_Angel

    Star_Angel Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 18, 2006
    Oh, I really liked this Krystal and I can?t wait until I get to read more. Syfer sounds like a cool guy and being one who haven?t had a diary myself, I can understand him.


    EDIT: I forgot to ask before, but if you make a pm list for this story, could you add me to it?
     
  4. slow_dawn

    slow_dawn Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    Apr 18, 2006
    but sometimes he is known to throw things in heavy frustration

    Not at all Jedi-like. I wonder where this will lead....
     
  5. Star-Foozle

    Star-Foozle Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Aug 24, 2006
    Master! You didn't tell me you were doing one of these, too!

    So? that?s that, diary/journal/datapad/memorystick thing. Yeah. That?s what I?ll call you. Yeah, you.

    Haha, love that. :p

    Would you PM me with updates? I'd love to see where this goes. Nice work, I'm looking forward to more!

    ~Little :D
     
  6. KELIA

    KELIA Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 26, 2005
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

    Loved the little peek into Syfer's thoughts. And he's right, it 's probably a good idea to keep the ones where he mentions his Master from his Master.

    Looking forward to more.

    =D==D==D==D=
     
  7. KrystalBlaze

    KrystalBlaze Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Aug 3, 2002
    Yes, I've changed the title. Why? Because I want to use the old one for my Bail epic and dammit, I'm going to use it! :p

    Leona: Hmm, I wonder indeed.

    Star_Angel: I'm glad you liked it and can relate. Syfer is very near and dear to my heart. [face_love]

    Slow_dawn: Njaun Tali is a very... odd man.

    Padawan-Mine: You actually gave me the idea and thanks for it. ;) I will certainly let you know.

    Kelia: I'm glad you liked Syfer and found the entry humorous. It's what I'm going for, but humor isn't my strong point.




    [b]Entry Two[/b]

    Diary/journal/datapad/memorystick thing ?

    Cam wants to read what I?ve written so far, but I?m not quite sure I want to let her. Call it a possession, but I want this to be mine. Fine, it is a possession. I know she?s the one who wanted me to start you, but? but I started this, not here.

    Congratulations. You?ve been promoted to ?you.? You now have an identity but alas, you?ll keep the name. I like it. It suits you so you?re keeping it, and they?ll be no complaining, understand?

    This is almost fun, actually! Who else gets to hear me complain except Cam, and she?s almost never here. I guess I could complain to Cam, but she?ll just write about it, or make a story about it. When Madame Nu dies, Cam should take the position, if only to be surrounded everyday by thousands of collections of stories, lore, information ? Cam will love it, but she?s probably better off as an active Padawan.

    But that?s years away, Force-damn it.

    I made a mistake the other day and left you wedged in the cushions of the couch. When Master Tali went to sit down, he felt it. I was making myself something to eat and he called me over, waving you around. It wasn?t the highlight of my life, let me tell you. I almost choked when he sat me down.

    He asked me why I left my belongings laying everywhere. He wasn?t my mother (thank the Force!!) and didn?t need to be cleaning up after me. He tossed it at me and slammed the door when he went to his room. I put you away, but c?mon! I just left you out for a second.

    I?m tired of him making me feel bad for not cleaning. I?m almost an adult now and I don?t need him to tell me to clean. I certainly don?t need his advice in anything other than just what he?s supposed to teach me.

    Honestly!!

    Well, I must go. The Master of my Heart and Soul is calling.

    And now, it?s not Cam.

    I miss Cam.
     
  8. Layren

    Layren Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 28, 2003
    Krystal I just love your OC :D [face_laugh]Really great entries, so far! Please PM me when you update and I'll do my best to keep up ;)


     
  9. Rhodna

    Rhodna Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Nov 28, 2006
    Well, I must go. The Master of my Heart and Soul is calling.

    I like Syfer, he's quite a character. It's funny that he resents his Master for making him clean - it reminds me of a 'normal' teenage child-parent relationship - normal being a highly relative term! :p

    Add me to the PM list please! :D
     
  10. DancesWithBlasters

    DancesWithBlasters Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 22, 2006
    Oh, I love this! Your OC is wonderful! Completely awesome! Please add me to your PM list.
     
  11. Star-Foozle

    Star-Foozle Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Aug 24, 2006
    Nice update, Master!

    Syfer really seems like a fun character. I love all his commentary, here. The whole cleaning thing was funny -- apparently even Padawans don't like housekeeping duties! This Master Tali, though...hmm. I'm not sure what to make of him yet. He seems to be a moody sort of person.

    This is almost fun, actually!

    Indeed. :D

    Good work on this, I look forward to the next bit! =D=

    ~Your Padawan

     
  12. KrystalBlaze

    KrystalBlaze Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Aug 3, 2002
    Layren: glad you liked him! when he's older he'll kick Drex's butt... [face_mischief]

    Rhodna: Syfer is near and dear to my heart, so I'm glad you like him. And if ever I do an update list I'll make sure to get you. :)

    DancesWithBlasters: Thank you! :)

    Starrie: Thanks! I'm trying to make Syfer human as possible and get rid of that invincible Jedi portrayal I've got about him in my mind and make him hate cleaning - because, c'mon, we all do.




    [b]Entry Three[/b]

    Diary/journal/datapad/memorystick thing-

    The days go on and on now, it seems. It?s been a long time since our last mission, which does nothing for my morale. It doesn?t fit me well to be in Master Tali?s path whenever he gets into one of his moods. I?ve learned to avoid them, but sometimes they happen at the oddest times. Either way, I?m sick of being in the Temple all the Force-damned time.

    The Temple is home, of course. It?s the only place I can actually call a home. I?ve been here since I was a baby, so I know these walls and these people. The Jedi are my family, with fellow Padawan siblings, aunts and uncles. I even have a father ? complete with reprimands, chores and a barely contained tolerance.

    I guess that?s unfair of me. Master Tali cares for me, and I care for him. It?s just I see some other Padawan-Master relationships and look at the bond there and I want it. I supposed I want for it, which is something I can never discuss with my Master. He?ll hear nothing of a want need, because he believes I?ve outgrown my wanting stage. I guess he should want to hear that I haven?t. It?s his job to teach me to fight it, after all.

    But I won?t service his own wants, not now.

    I was bored yesterday after classes, so I went to the Star Room. The Star Room is my favorite room of the Temple. Whenever I need to get away, it?s there I go. I?ll bring Cam sometimes, if she?s around, but usually it?s just me. Master Tali has no time for my idleness, and so he never accompanies me. But whenever I can, I go.

    The Star Room is huge, I guess. Lots of benches and patches of ground to lay and gaze. You?re not supposed to go there to just gaze, though. It?s actually like the Archives, where you go to get information. But you?ll find loads of Padawans and Knights there gazing at the stars.

    When I got there, Raryin Kkyi was there. Raryin is a Bith, about my age. His Master was injured a few missions back, so Raryin is around a lot like me now, except Master Tali is fine. We?re just grounded for some reason, or the Council is waiting to send us on a mission. Either way, I?m sick of being here, and I think Raryin is too.

    I don?t like Raryin much, except he?s the only one I can ever find nowadays. He?s a little too much like my Master in his utter devotion to the Code. I much prefer Cam, who will laugh at the Code with me.

    Raryin punched me in the arm when I got there, his usual greeting. I didn?t punch back ? not because I didn?t want to, but because he?ll just give back better than I can give. Bith hands are stronger than human hands, and Raryin is a monster at them.

    We talked for a little, but nothing happened until he asked me about Cam. It was so casual I just had to stop and look at him. Now, Cam is my friend, my best friend. Everyone knows that. So what happened next, diary/journal/datapad/memorystick thing, is not completely my fault.

    When I asked Raryin why he was asking, he just said he wanted to see her. So me telling him to leave her alone is completely warranted. Raryin is a snake who doesn?t need to see Cam, and certainly not ask for her. Cam is my best friend. He asked again and I said it again. When he asked again I punched him and before I knew it he had socked me in the face.

    Now, how is that warranted? My punches don?t hurt him! He doesn?t need to be knocking me in the face. When he left I laughed, but really it just hurt. My nose still hurts and I?m still sneezing blood.

    Force-stinking Bith and their attitude problems. What?s next, he?s gonna jump me?

    Stupid Bith.
     
  13. Artanis

    Artanis Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    May 10, 2005
    I felt so disappointed when I got to the end of the third update - I wanted more. :p Your entries are delightful, and your OCs vivid. I can't wait to see where this might go. So...can I get on a PM list? :)
     
  14. KELIA

    KELIA Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 26, 2005
    I couldn't help but laugh at the image of Master Tali sitting on the Diary/journal/datapad/memorystick thing.

    It was sweet of Syfer to try and protect Cam from Raryin, though he paid a hefty price for it.

    Very nice updates

    =D= =D= =D= =D=

     
  15. Star-Foozle

    Star-Foozle Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Aug 24, 2006
    Yay, an update!

    Hurrah for non-invincible Jedi. I love stories that manage to step out of the traditional unfallable-servant-of-the-Force mode and make the characters seem believably human (or alien. :p ) This is one of the reasons I like Syfer, especially.

    It was nice of Syfer to try to protect his friend from the Bith. Maybe it's just me, but I'm sensing a great deal of big-brotherness towards Cam. *hands Syfer an ice-pack for his nose* It was the thought that counts, I suppose. :)

    I guess that?s unfair of me. Master Tali cares for me, and I care for him. It?s just I see some other Padawan-Master relationships and look at the bond there and I want it. I supposed I want for it, which is something I can never discuss with my Master. He?ll hear nothing of a want need, because he believes I?ve outgrown my wanting stage. I guess he should want to hear that I haven?t. It?s his job to teach me to fight it, after all.

    Hmm. I'm not sure I like Tali. I suppose he means well, but Syfer's still a kid, after all. [face_plain]

    Anyways, nice work, Master. I look forward to the next update!

    =D=
     
  16. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    This is wonderful! :D

    Please put me on your PM list? [face_praying]

    =D=
     
  17. DancesWithBlasters

    DancesWithBlasters Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 22, 2006
    Hum. Hum, hum, hum. I'm not liking this Master Tali all that much. There's definetly something off with him, I'm sure of it. Suspcious grounding, unstable emotions? That speaks of some deep trouble.

    Anyway, I loved Syfer, though. It's adorable, though he sounds like a person who would get offended by being called that, when he punches the Bith because he wants to protect Cam. [face_love] He's such a good friend! Although, that probably wasn't the best way to go about things, was it?

    Well, update soon, and please don't forget to add me to the PM list, if there is one.
     
  18. KrystalBlaze

    KrystalBlaze Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Aug 3, 2002
    Sorry for the update on this one, guys! School started this month, so I've been busy with new classes and my sorority. I won't be able to write as much anymore on anything, but hopefully enough to keep this story somewhat afloat. :)

    Artanis: Thank you so much. [face_blush] I got all blushy. I'm glad you like Syfer and the gang. I like him too. :) I'm not doing a PM list because I honestly don't have the time, but I would love if you could stop by again but I understand. Thanks so much! :D

    Kelia: Well, I'm glad you chuckled at least. ;) Thank you for reading.

    Little: Hurrah for non-invincible Jedi. I love stories that manage to step out of the traditional unfallable-servant-of-the-Force mode and make the characters seem believably human[/b] I love them too! I'm really of the mind that the Jedi are NOT perfect in the way we think they are, that they had struggles and hated chores and all had a bit of anger and unwellness inside them. I think Jedi need to love all things, passionately, compassionately, to be able to serve the Force. It's one of my endless frustrations with the GFFA canon, but then again it is canon. So I guess this is AUish.

    Makes you wonder, though. Hmm. [face_thinking] Anyhow dear thank you for the thought-provoking reply.

    MamaV: thank you for the continued readership of Syfer. :D

    DancesWithBlasters: Oh, Syfer is teh loveth! 8-} He thanks you. :p As do I. Thank you for the detailed reply. It makes my day. I'm glad you're enjoying this.




    [b]Entry Four[/b]

    Dear diary/journal/datapad/memorystick thing ?

    I haven?t been writing lately. I?ve been busy. Master Tali put me on restriction when he found out I got into a ?fight? with Raryin. He asked me why my nose was bleeding when I got home that day. I considered lying to him, but he would know, and Jedi don?t lie, anyhow. So I told him Raryin had punched me.

    And really, it should have ended there. After all, I was punched and bleeding. There was no need to go on, truly. He should have just accepted what I told him and not gone into the great detail he went into. Master Tali loves details. He likes everything organized, neat and in a package. Cam finds this endlessly amusing because Master Tali also loves the Code, and every Jedi will tell you besides the mantra it?s nothing that is meticulously organized the way Master Tali likes his things meticulously organized.

    But anyway, he wasn?t too pleased when I told him I?d struck first and that it was over Cam. I tried to slink past that part, quick and all, but Master Tali was having none of it. He made me repeat word for word what had been exchanged. Then he made me meditate on my fault, bloody nose and all, right in the living room where he could see me. I did my meditations, all right, but I?ve never been very good at them. It?s something about giving over completely to the Force that bothers me. Master Tali says I?m too individualistic and if I want to be a good Jedi I?ll just go ahead and give in.

    But that principle has never been my strong suit. I like my individualism. I see things differently if I look at them differently. I see different scenarios. My instructors always tell me to just shut up and pay attention, but I?m not that way. I like to know why. I like to learn motivations and the why.

    Master Tali doesn?t, not in anyway. After I meditated he told me to clean up and be ready to leave in half and hour. He checked my nose and told me it wasn?t broken and to get medicine if it still hurt. Then we went to Raryin?s apartments, where he lives with his Master.

    Seeing as none of this was my fault, I find it highly hurtful that I had to get on my knees, touch my forehead to the deck and ask for Raryin?s forgiveness. I can?t believe he let me do that, looking like an idiot and all when I was the one with a sore head and bloody nose. He forgave me, the idiot, like he the right to. My duty to him was to offer up the offending information about Cam and shine his boots.

    Sometimes customs are outdated. And
     
  19. Layren

    Layren Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 28, 2003

    Seeing as none of this was my fault, I find it highly hurtful that I had to get on my knees, touch my forehead to the deck and ask for Raryin?s forgiveness. I can?t believe he let me do that, looking like an idiot and all when I was the one with a sore head and bloody nose. He forgave me, the idiot, like he the right to. My duty to him was to offer up the offending information about Cam and shine his boots.



    Awwww man, poor guy, have to really feel for him. That's a rather degrading punishment. Excellent work :)
     
  20. DancesWithBlasters

    DancesWithBlasters Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 22, 2006
    I don't know how I missed this, sorry! Anyway, this post was interesting. There was a lot buried under the surface. It troubles me. The whole situation with Cam and what's-his-name that Syfer punched is strange, and scares me. Not to mention I really think his master has some issues.

    I also thought Syfer's thoughts about giving himself totally up to the Force were very, very interesting. I had never really thought about it like that before. I always assumed it was just something Jedi did, that it didn't bother them. I thought they must have liked it, being Jedi and all. But I never viewed it as a loss of indivulatity.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.