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~Advice Needed~

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction and Writing Resource' started by Xander_Kenobi, Sep 14, 2003.

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  1. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
    I recently came up with this idea and need some people to tell me what they think of it...

    It seems like a normal day at the newly formed temple on Yavin 4. All of the sudden, sensors pick up an unidentified ship entering the atmosphere. It is a beat up delivery speeder with only one lifeform onboard. Luke senses a familar presense and tells the gunner not to shoot it. It lands harmlessly in the Jedi hangar. Luke, lightsaber at the ready, steps a few meters away from the access door. The door opens slowly and loudly. At first glance the figure seems to be humaniod and possibly, human. The figure walks slowly toward Luke. Luke, nerves twiching, ask who the tresspasser is. The figure says "I am Xander Kenobi, son of Obi-Wan Kenobi."

    * * *

    Luke sits meditating in his quarters. "How, how can this be?" he thinks silently to himself. Meanwhile, Xander dreams innocently on his sleepcouch. He is awoken by a voice he hasn't heard in a few days. "Hello again my son." Xander suddenly realizes who that voice belongs to. Standing there in front of him is none other than Obi-Wan Kenobi. While Xander was in space, fending of space pirates, his father was with him every step of the way. In fact, if it wasn't for his father's wisdom and courage, he would be space dust. "Yes father." Xander says respectfully. "Son, you have made it to Yavin 4. Luke Skywalker can help you more than I can now. Therefore, I give you a gift. In my current form I can't just hand one over...I have to become it."Obi-Wan states. "I don't understand. Will that mean I won't see your face again?" Xander asks. "Yes, but I can forge my spirt within it so you can have the wisdom I have whenever you posess it. And now I say good-bye my son. I am proud of you and I have a feeling your mother would be to." All of the sudden, Obi-Wan's face illuminated in a blinding light. Xander shielded his eyes instantly. Then the light vanished along with his father's presense. Where he stand, there was a metal stick of some sort. He bent down to obtain it. As he picked it up, He felt his father's touch that he felt a few moments before. He knew when he gazed at the stick, His destiny had suddenly changed.

    (This is the "metal stick" I was talking about)

    Well I will work on this for awile. Please will some people tell me what they think of this.

    ~Xander_Kenobi~
     
  2. C_o_r_u_s_c_a_n_t

    C_o_r_u_s_c_a_n_t Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 21, 2003
    I believe this would go in one of the Saga Fanfiction forums. :) They'll tell you all you need there!

    ;)
     
  3. Amidala_Skywalker

    Amidala_Skywalker Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 4, 2001
    Hmm, C_o_r_u_s_c_a_n_t, it seems to me like Xander is asking for advice concerning his story before he posts it in one of the new era forums. If that?s the case, it belongs here. If he is intending to post his story right now, then yes, it belongs in the Saga forum.

    Am [face_love]
     
  4. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
    This is strictly for advice purposes
     
  5. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
    No more advice? :(
     
  6. Amidala_Skywalker

    Amidala_Skywalker Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 4, 2001
    Xander, perhaps you should put the words ?Advice needed? in your subject line? It might attract people.

    Am [face_love]
     
  7. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
    umm...can I change it like it is right now or do you have to lock it and I change the name?




    arrgh maties!
     
  8. Amidala_Skywalker

    Amidala_Skywalker Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 4, 2001
    You can change it right now. Just go your first post and click ?Edit Message?. It will take you to another window where you can change the ?Subject Line?.

    Am [face_love]
     
  9. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
    Thank You AM
     
  10. JediKlea

    JediKlea Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 19, 2002
    Wow! That is a really intriguing storyline, its a un-explored area to! [those are getting scarce in the SWs universe these days ;)] I would definantly say post it, and PLEASE PM me with the link if you do, so I can read it :)
     
  11. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
    Thank you and I will! :)
     
  12. PUREJUSTICE

    PUREJUSTICE Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Aug 30, 2003
    Really good plot to it Xander
     
  13. just_another_clone

    just_another_clone Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Sep 19, 2003
    I concur, way to go landing this whopper of a plot!
     
  14. Jedi_Liz

    Jedi_Liz Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 24, 2000
    This is an intriguing plot. I'd possibly check it out if you posted it. What sort of advice did you need?
     
  15. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
    I just want peeps' opinions of how they like it and tell me things I need to fix
     
  16. dan-yoda

    dan-yoda Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 14, 2003
    Cool story line. I think it's funny you named the main character after yourself. I think it would be cool if Xander became a dark Jedi and tried to recreate the empire. That's just my idea. LOL.

    Yodaman.
     
  17. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
    Thanks but I kinda want him to be the hero, maybe take over the temple when he grows up and Luke and Leia are gone.
     
  18. scooby_doofus

    scooby_doofus Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Sep 20, 2003
    yea, that seems to be the smart choice but pick whatever suites you best
     
  19. -JediKnight-

    -JediKnight- Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2003
    very nice plot Xander
     
  20. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
  21. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
  22. tatooinewizard

    tatooinewizard Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    May 13, 2003
    I think it's the best story idea I've every heard! ;)

    Honestly I think it's an interesting premise. Go with it. :)
     
  23. Xander_Kenobi

    Xander_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 25, 2003
    So do I have a "thumbs-up" or a "thumbs-down" for the completion of this story?
     
  24. tatooinewizard

    tatooinewizard Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    May 13, 2003
    My advice, Xander. If you want to do the story do it. Things are much better when you do them for yourself.
     
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