All things Buffy and Angel; ep by ep rewatch and reviews

I always figured that with the Ascension approaching and his position being undermined by Mr Trick he had second thoughts and was there to try to meet the Scoobies?

The Wish certainly has the butterfly effect. As for Lover's Walk it signals the beginning of the end for Bangel, the seeds of Angel;TS are sown here

Dopplegangland

The Good;
The beginning of the father/daughter relationship between Faith and The Mayor, Anya comes into her own, VampWillow is a joy to behold, Wes actually makes himself useful, all of the library scenes are comedy classics and the lesbian subtext rapidly starts to become text. The great final gag.

The Bad;
None, it's all fabulous

Best line;
Willow (appreciating her cleavage in VampWillow's leathers) "Gosh, look at those!"
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Poor Sandy, although this isn't the last we'll see of her. And VampWillow get's her dusty desserts back in the Wishworld.
Shot;
VampWillow by real Willow.
Tied up;
Nope although Vampwillow is caged

Knocked out;
Anya and VampWillow
Women good/men bad;
VampWillow; "Bitch!" (all in the delivery). The beginning of the epic hostility between Anya and Willow.
Jeez!;
VampWillow killing Sandy is akin to snuff. Also her breaking of the other vamps fingers
Kinky dinky;
How much time have you got? VampWillow has the hots for everything in sight, Xander, Willow, Sandy. She speaks of 'riding people in chains like ponys' (and I've met more than a few Alysson Hannigan fans over the years who would gladly volunteer). Plenty of naughty touching. Meanwhile Faith refers to 'all the screwing' at her hotel and the Mayor as 'Sugardaddy' but he turns down her advances, making her actually love him more. Best of all is the scary visual place of Willow and Oz playing 'Mistress of Pain' (I'm sure there's a fanfic somewhere?). Percy says he 'owns Willow's ass' but actually it seems to be the other way around. Willow says she feels like 'Dying a virgin'
Calling Captain Subtext;
Will refers to snuggling and thinks her vamp self is 'kinda gay'. She also get's a curious look on her face at the thought of 'breeding' with Percy. VampWillow fancies everything in sight but her lusting after Cordelia's neck is especially interesting considering VampWill's already had a bite in The Wish. Willow's jealousy of Faith is very apparent. Note VampWill still loves Xander much in the same way Spike and Dru still love one another (maybe they were sired by Dru in the Wishverse?). Giles seems to have a very real affection for Will and as we'll later learn she has the same for him. We learn that VampWillow has a great deal in common with real Will.
Guantanamo Bay;
Pretty much everyone is ruthless all around, the plan for luring the vamps out is masterful. Again Buffy shows her skill as a general and not just a fighter.
The dodgy message of the week is to make athletes care about history tests you should beat them up?
Scoobies to the ER;
Not this week
Where's Dawn?

Questions and observations;
The first appearance of Percy and D'Hoffryn. Devon back again, Oz and Angel seem to have a pretty good relationship to judge from their conversation. Faith continues her slide but can't kill for the Mayor yet. Wes saves Cordy for the first but not last time. According to Angel your human self influences your vamp self (as we see with Spike). Xander is oddly pleased at the thought of his vamp self. I figure that the Wishworld run's paralell to the real world but stops dead the moment Giles smashes the necklace. Anya is 1120 years old.
When you look at the scene in the Bronze where VampWillow beats up Percy and Xander asks 'Is it a funny thing?' it looks as though it's Larry amidst the crowd but his name isn't in the titles
This ep features one of the most understated but important scenes in the whole series. VampWillow walks down Sunnydale mainstreet. In her world where Buffy never came to Sunnydale it's a bleak and deserted wasteland. In the real world, it's full of happy, laughing people. Sure people still die in Sunnyda

 

Enemies
The Good;
Loads more Faith/Mayor stuff and some strong emotional work between Angel and Buffy. The return of 'Angelus' and a heck of a Keyser Soze. Faith's treachery revealed at last. Also some very nice comedy with Xander and an interesting scene with Angel, Faith and Joyce.

The Bad;
Again quite painful to watch Faith's slide to the darkside.

Best line;
A toss up between Buffy's triumphant 'Psych!' and 'Minature golf'
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Only the demon. Faith still hasn't gone all the way yet, she still feels guilt about what she does. Again we see a non-dangerous demon spared by Buffy, shades of grey entering the Buffyverse rather than just humans good/demons bad. Willow bags her first vamp who's skin must be awfully soft if it can be penetrated by a pencil.
Shot;

Tied up;
Buffy in chains. Or is she? Angelus comments that Buffy and he never tried chains, Faith comments that bondage looks good on her.

Knocked out;
Buffy and Angel (or are they?)
Women good/men bad;
The women are very bad in this ep
Jeez!;
Faith gutting the demon seems very graphic
Kinky dinky;
Faith sitting astride Angelus and him asking her to 'wriggle'. Faith pawing at him in the Mayor's office (weirdly I think ED looks her most beautiful ever in this scene). Buffy chained up with Faith about to 'torture' her smacks mightily of S&M 'If you're a screamer, feel free'. Angel(us) flatters Joyce (love KS's little 'I still got it' look of triumph). Buffy and Angel go to see some sort of arty yet sexy French film which can't help their celibacy towards each other. Faith refers to the then topical Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinsky sex scandal "Close but no cigar". Faith's low cut black top really is hookerwear, her cleavage looking like it's about to explode out of it at any moment. Would Faith having sex with Angel really have robbed him off his soul? To judge by what we learn on Angel (Darla, Nina, The Furies, Eve) almost certainly not. Willow describes Faith as the 'do that girl' although she's done her own boyfriend stealing in her time. Faith and Angelus seem to think beating each other up is foreplay. Angelus refers to himself as a boy toy as Faith refer to Xander in Consequences. The Mayor once again demonstrates his father's love for Faith, concerned that Angelus will keep her out late. Oz refers to Cordy as jail-bait.

Calling Captain Subtext;
Faith kissing Buffy even after they fight, even when they're holding knives at each other's throats. Interesting to note Faith's little look when 'Angelus' speaks to Joyce, it's rather guarded, she's not going to let him hurt her. Faith tells Angel she's 'keeping Buffy warm for him' and . Her rant whilst Buffy is chained up has the air of a rejected lover, jealous of Buffy's boyfriend. Even now Faith and Buffy still walk arm in arm and refer to one another as girlfriend. Angelus wants the Mayor to call him 'Master'.
Guantanamo Bay;
Giles, Angel and Buffy's plan is very clever and dirty. Wes thinks Faith would be helpful in persuading the demon. Xander says he beat up Willy the Snitch but actually just slipped him some money.
Scoobies to the ER;
Xander gets 'a good bruise'
Where's Dawn?
Presumably at the house when Faith and Angel arrive.When Faith has her rant against Buffy she notes 'you got the mom!' making the subtext pretty much text. Anyone want to bet that in everyone's revised memories she also says 'You got the little sister'? After all, Dawn could very easily have been Faith's sister if things had worked out differently.

Questions and observations;
And now the die is cast! So what would have happened if Angel had really turned? Either Buffy defeats them, the Scoobies rescue her or Faith doesn't go through with it? When Faith is about to torture Buffy she seems to still be psyching herself up, as if she can't quite go through with it. Read a very good fanfic once where Angelus does start to torture Buffy but her screams revive memories of Faith' own childhood abuse and she rescues Buffy. When Faith goes to Ange

 

Earshot

The Good;
It's all stunning. Jonathon shows his star quality, the mindreading is excellent, the comedy and action fantastic. If I was to select one ep to show to people to demonstrate how great the series is I think it would be this one. The only thing that could make it better would be if Faith and Dawn were in it.

The Bad;
Um? Well, the excuse of why Buffy can't read Angel's mind is rather stupid. It's also a letdown that we never get to read Faith's thoughts.

Best line;
Hard to pick but I think I'll go for Jonathon 'You all think I'm an idiot. A SHORT idiot!" (although at 5'2 he's only an inch shorter than SMG, not "3 feet tall"). The one I use all the time though is Oz's 'I call that a radical interpretation of the text' plus Angel's 'I'm a funny guy'. Buffy's entire speech to Jonathon is just too beautiful for words.
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
None, thankfully
Shot;
Again none although Jonathon has a deer-rifle to kill himself. Some have asked why he uses something as cumbersome as a rifle but even the US has some gun control and they're easier to get than a handgun.
Tied up;
Not this ep

Knocked out;
Dinner lady by Buffy and Buffy herself faints.
Women good/men bad;
Again a female villain

Jeez!;
RAT POISON IN THE JELLY! The dinner lady is actually a recurring character, she's also amongst the mob in BBB. Xander's comment on 'taking out the place with a semi-automatic' and later admission that this is 'bordering on trendy at this point' is obviously near the knuckle. You wonder if things had worked out differently if Xander could have been one of season 6's trio (making them a quartet).
Kinky dinky;
Buffy is flattered by one of the male students admiring her beauty (love her bashful preening) then shocked that he wants to slam her against the lockers and ravish her (love to know what the second guy in that scene was thinking?). She won't always be so dainty, one day she'll happily allow Spike to do that to her and a whole lot more! But maybe it's an inherited thing amongst the Summer's girls as we finally discover the truth about Joyce and Ripper and the handcuffs on the hood of the police car? And Dawn will of course end up giving RJ a lapdance in 'Him'. Seems denial and sluttiness run in the Summer's family? (as well as incredible beauty). Willow worries that Buffy will develop a 'boy demon part' as her aspect of the demon. Oz and Xander admire Cordy and the cheerleaders. Freddy describes them a 'pseudo prostitutes whipping men up into a sexual frenzy'. Wes considers himself a very bad man for lusting after Cordy. Cordy has kneemarks on her back but claims their from the cheerleading pyramid. Once again Xander shows his yen for older women, fancying the English teacher. Willow tells Jonathon that 'fantasies are fun'. Xander questioning of a trio of babes seems to resemble the questions Playboy ask their Playmate of the Month rather than the FBIs serial killer profile.
Calling Captain Subtext;
Xander once again has one of his uncomfortable talks with Larry. Despite being able to read Willow's mind Buffy doesn't pick up any hints of lesbianism. Her reading of Cordy's mind demonstrates that Cordy really doesn't have a subtext, she literally says what she thinks. Nice to see that The Merchant of Venice is still relevant in supernatural teen US series. Xander considers Wes 'Pierce Brosnany' which is a weird way for one straight man to think of another.
Guantanamo Bay;
Of course this is the ep which was postponed by the Columbine massacre. For UK fans it meant that we got to see the last eps of season 3 FIRST and if you waited for the video boxsets wonderful vigin eps one after the other. Willow interrogates Jonathom again.
Scoobies to the ER;
Where's Dawn?
It would have been interesting to hear Dawn's thoughts about all things Sunnydale. The only time we see Wes meet Joyce and presumably the littlelest Summers as well. Does Dawn ever learn about Joyce and Ripper's tryst?

Questions and observations;
Wonderful in just so many

 

I enjoyed Punisher:War Zone. While not great, it is the closest hollywood has come to doing Punisher correctly.

 

Yeah, it wasn't too bad, the guy playing Frank was well cast as were Micro and Jigsaw. But stuff like Frank hanging off the lampshade with a gun in each hand wasn't the Punisher, he'd be waiting in the rock garden with an M60 and a bunch of Claymores. The lovely Julie Benz was wasted too.

Choices

The Good;
Buffy does a heist movie. Some clever foreshadowing of events to come and some good strategising on the part of the gang, taking the offensive for once. The Faith and Willow showdown and Oz shows his love in a suitably taciturn manner. Love the diagram Willow makes of Oz and Xander, distinguishable by stick-figure Oz having a guitar.
The Bad;
The creatures in the box look a bit ropey, Buffy takes 'inspiration' from Aliens not for the first time and not for the last.

Best line;
Willow; "Sounds like your mom's in a state of denial"
Buffy; "More like a continent"
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Faith kills another human/demon? SDH loses another staff member, this time one of the security guards.
Shot;
No but Faith kills the courier with her bow from Bad Girls.
Tied up;
Buffy get's tangled in the wires, Willow gets captured but not tied up.

Knocked out;

Women good/men bad;
Cordy seems unnecessarily snarky about Willows acceptence from the universties but we'll understand more about that later.
Jeez!;
Poor old security guard, what a way to go! Was I the only one who took a few seconds to comprehend what Faith meant by her 'cut through bone ' remark?
Kinky dinky;

Calling Captain Subtext;
The Faith/Willow showdown has a lot of the elements of two jealous lovers fighting over their shared object of desire. The Buffy and Willow rolling around on the ground at the end telling one another they love them is a slashficcer's dream.
Guantanamo Bay;
Buffy beats up and interrogates the Mayor's limo driver before 'introducing him to Mr Pointy'. A tough call with the trade for Willow, if they had not gone through with it, Larry, Snyder, the Professor Faith kills, Harmony etc might never have died.
Scoobies to the ER;
Where's Dawn?
How does she feel about Buffy going away to university? Happy to have more time to herself in the bathroom or will she miss not having her big sis around the place?
What the fanficcers though?
Instead of fighting Buffy seduces The Mayor into giving up evil; http://buffy.adultfanfiction.net/story.php?no=600031095
Questions and observations;
Good ep, carrying the central storyline forwards whilst also accepting that life goes on outside the Hellmouth. The first time that most of the Scooby gang actually meet the Mayor. Cordy working in the shop is a shocker and no mistake. Joyce calls Buffy's Aunt Arlene, is she Joyce's sister or Hanks? Is she the mother of cousin Celia from 'Killed by Death'? The Mayor's comments on Buffy and Angel are true and Joyce will say pretty much the same in the next episode. First appearance of Faith's knife which looks like something the Klingons would use on Star Trek.

Marks out of 10; 6/10

 

The Prom

The Good;
All lovely, touching beyond belief and yet still plenty of action and funny stuff, works better when you have an emotional investment in the series. The music especially is excellent plus the wedding sequence must have sent many a Bangler's heart aflutter. The class protector award and scene where Joyce has 'The Talk' with Angel are just wonderful.

The Bad;
Again, could only be bettered if it had Dawn and Faith in it. In truth the devil dogs do look rather stupid but who cares, this is genius.

Best line;
Buffy; "Giles we get it, miles to go before we sleep" (somehow I can't imagine Robert Frost being quoted on Charmed)
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Does the guy at the menswear shop live or die?
Shot;
No but Buffy uses her crossbow to good effect.
Tied up;
Only Tucker

Knocked out;
For once everyone stays conscious
Women good/men bad;
Tucker wants to kill everyone at the prom because he couldn't get a date. JERK! Anya meanwhile has after a 1000 years of avenging men's wrongs nothing but contempt for them. But still wants to go to the Prom with one.

Jeez!;
Tucker feeds his pets on cow brains, yuck! Probably not as cruel as making them watch all those prom videos.
Kinky dinky;
Anya; "I know you find me attractive, I've seen you looking at my breasts"
Xander; "Nothing personal but when a guy does that it just means his eyes are open"
Wes thinks Cordy in her prom dress is 'hot'. He's not wrong.

Calling Captain Subtext;
Will and Buffy in each other's arms on her bed.
Guantanamo Bay;
What exactly do they do with Tucker? Turn him over to the police on charges of Hellhound raising?

Scoobies to the ER;
Where's Dawn?
Nowhere to be seen this week but you figure one day she might have the same talk with Spike or The Immortal that Joyce has with Angel.

Questions and observations;
We'll never see Tucker again (although he might always show up in season 8?) but of course he's Andrew the Nerd's brother. Buffy dislikes Kool and the Gang's 'Celebration'? For shame! Even Oz gets all teary at 'We are family'. Everyone looks dynamite in their prom gear and the relationship with Giles and Buffy has such a resonance. Looking at Alexis in his tux you could imagine him being James Bond. Buffy writes 'Buffy and Angel 4ever' in her homework book. Sorry Spuffers, I think that settles it. The scene where Cordy and Xander meet at the prom is so great, you finally know she's forgiven him. According to Jonathon thanks to Buffy this year's class of SDH has the lowest mortality rate ever. I don't know if anyone counted but what must the rest of them have been like? As we see the end of the Buffy/Angel romance we see the beginning of Anya/Xander. Wes very much part of the group now and get's to dance with Cordy. Love to know a little more about Jonathon's date, was she from his therapy group? Poor Giles is the only one left stag for the evening. You wonder what Faith is doing across town, she must know the Prom is occuring?
Is the guy who wins the class clown award the one referred to in Conversations with Dead People as going insane?

Marks out of 10, 10/10 Buffy on such a roll.

 

You can't blame Buffy for hating Celebration! You just can't. Granted, I'm an old fogie/geek nerd-guy, esp for Buffy's high-school years, but this is one time when the music/song choice is something I agree with. Can't stand Celebration or We Are Family. Was played over the radio on the school bus every day for 3 years straight. Was sick to death of it after 3 months.

 

That sounds rather like aversion therapy. Or child abuse?

Graduation Day pt1

The Good;
The battle between Buffy and Faith is epic and a long time coming. Note that for some reason Buffy feels the need to put on her shiny red leather trousers before deciding to kick Faith's delectable butt?
The Bad;
Couldn't Buffy just let Angel have some of her blood in batches whilst chugging down iron pills by the handful? We know the Mayor's impervious to harm but why don't they just grab him and tie him up when he's in the library?

Best line;
Willow (guessing who the Graduation Speaker will be) "Seigfreid? Roy? One of the tigers?" (according to Lorne in Angel Seigreid is actually evil, Roy not so much) beating Xanders 'We're going to need a bigger boat' from Jaws. Xander also paraphrases Private Hudson from Aliens (who in turn is paraphrasing every Vietnam film you've ever seen).

Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
No but Angel on the brink. Faith's murder of the professor and her glib remark about it marks the nadir of her fall from grace. But you note that even then she wants her victim to turn around so she doesn't have to look into his eyes. When she chucks herself off the building it's her first suicide attempt but she'll make another later in Angel.
Shot;
Angel with Faith's bow and arrow
Tied up;
Buffy and Faith handcuffed together

Knocked out;
Angel and Faith in a coma
Women good/men bad;
Actually the relationship between Faith and the Mayor is lovely, especially when we see her in her dress. Faith also refers to her childhood in Boston again and you feel her pain. As for Xander he neatly sums up the male of the species;
"Yes, men like sports. Men watch the action movie. They eat of the beef and enjoy to look at the bosoms"
Buffy tells Wes 'I love it when you take charge, you man you' but one day she will. Will and Anya still have hostility.
Jeez!;
Faith killing the harmless old prof is beyond horrible. Plus the Mayor's eating the spiders (liquorice?). And Buffy sticks it to Faith with her great big knife
Kinky dinky;
What must the Professor and his neighbours think when Faith arrives on his doorstep dressed as she does? Probably how much does she charge per hour? I for one am glad we don't get to hear the end of Anya's shepherd story.
Calling Captain Subtext;
Again, violence and intimacy with Faith and Buffy who even penetrates Faith's body with her knife. Faith's goading Buffy about Angel's pain could once again be seen as sexual jealousy. Faith to Buffy "Give us a kiss". Faith also refers to Buffy as 'big sister'
Guantanamo Bay;
Buffy is quite prepared to feed Faith to Angel to save him
Scoobies to the ER;
Buffy get's a hiding at Faith's hands and Angel nearly dies through poisoning
Where's Dawn?
Presumably Buffy get's little sis out of town alongside Joyce.

Questions and observations;
Where's this anti-vamp poison been all these years? It would have come in useful, don't you think? Stonkingly good in almost every respect with the promise of even better things to come in pt 2. Love Will's chopper bike. Nice that Willow and Harmony make up before Harmony gets all bumpy. Can anyone please explain to me why exactly the Mayor wants to be a giant snake? What is his plan for Sunnydale? Buffy breaks from the Watcher's Council and won't come back into the fold again until season 5. Just what are the odds that Anya, the only living survivor of an Ascension just happens to be at SDH? Is that the work of God/the PTB?
Faith's method of surviving her fall off the roof is reminiscent of Catwoman in Batman Returns. Love Giles and Wes fencing which will come in useful for both later.

Marks out of 10;
8/10

 

Graduation Day pt2

The Good;
The final battle and the end of SDH (for the moment, at least). The chance to see some familar faces again and to say goodbye to others. Buffy and the rest of the Scoobies finally graduate into the adult world and if not exactly putting childish things aside growing past them. So great to see the kids of Sunnydale High fight back at last (although has this spoiled the survival record they were all so proud of in The Prom?) Snyder's introductory speech is a definite highlight. It's all terrific and I think we should all be proud to say that we graduated Sunnydale High, class of 1999
The Bad;
Are you kidding? Well, actually one thing that always bothered me was after we see a devastated Mayor visiting Faith in hospital he seems awfully chipper when briefing the vamps for the Graduation? Maybe the briefing the vamps scene was supposed to in a different order in the script?

Best line;
Willow; "Man, just ascend already!" just beating Xander's 'Good to know that when the chips are down you can feed on the girl who loves you to save your own ass!' Also fond of Oz 'Our lives are different to other peoples'.
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Byebye Larry (although his death isn't confirmed until season 6, I for one had no idea if he'd survived or not). Byebye Snyder who quite obviously had no clue what was going on. We see Harmony bitten but we don't see her sired? And byebye the Mayor, Harry Groener will be missed, he brought a lot to the table. Glad we'll see him again a few more times. Also unless I'm mistaken Cordy bags her first solo vamp.
Shot;
Vamps with flaming arrows, great idea straight out of every western you've ever seen.
Tied up;

Knocked out;
Faith still in a coma and will remain so for over a year. Buffy also unconscious. A pained Wes asks at the end could he be knocked unconscious.

Women good/men bad;
The Mayor refers to Buffy as a whore, a nastily misogynist remark. Buffy says Wes 'Screams like a woman' and compares Xander and Angel to squabbling old ladies.
Jeez!;
Watching the Mayor try to smother an unconscious Buffy is awful
Kinky dinky;
Angel biting Buffy. The sexiest scene you'll ever see between two fully clothed lovers, once again a vamp feeding is seen as a sexual act with violence as foreplay (the second time Buffy has been bitten by a vampire but by no means the last). Willow loses her virginity to Oz, it's all so sweet. Their van sex proves Cordy's theory about danger being an aphrodisiac. Willow says that its the best time of her life.
Calling Captain Subtext;
The entire Buffy/Faith dream sequence is just one huge Buffy/Faith love in, especially Faith's caressing of Buffy's face and Buffy kissing an unconscious Faith. Face it, they love each other, they're meant to be together. And remember it's Faith who gives Buffy the secret of defeating the Mayor. Angel in his delerium also mistakes Oz for Buffy, THAT would have been an interesting conversation! Wes and Cordy's kiss is a disaster, one day they'll love each other plenty but not like that.
Guantanamo Bay;
Buffy gets Angel into vampface by slapping him around a little. Is Buffy going to let Angel drain Faith entirely or give them a bit of each of their blood?
Scoobies to the ER;
Buffy is taken to hospital for blood loss whilst Wes is carted away at the end. The Scoobs must be such frequent visitors there the staff must know them by name.
Where's Dawn?
Safely out of town with Joyce. However I think it's no great leap of imagination to say that the cat in the dream sequence is representative of Dawn. Indeed this could be the moment it's decided she's Buffy's sister rather than Faith's. Faith remarks about 'Little Miss Muffet, counting down from 730' which of course is 365x2 and it'll be 2 years before Dawnie shows up.

Questions and observations;
Goodbye Angel, he makes a fantastic exit. Again, what exactly is the Mayor's plan? He obviously believes in a sort of idealised vision of Sunnydale, how is being a huge snake going to achieve that? Also althoug

 

The Freshman (or Freshwoman?)

The Good;
Very clever ep, it's interesting that we really feel for Buffy, we're used to her being invincible but here she's bested by an ordinary vamp and it shakes her and us (note that people refer to her as 'Willow's friend'). Of course, our girl comes back and it's possible she was only off her game because Kathy had been sucking her soul. Great opening gag with the vamp behind Buffy and Will and it's amazing how funny the old comedy cliche of the smallest person carrying the biggest load can be.

The Bad;
It is disturbing to see Buffy so upset but the whole idea of putting the heroine in peril is to see her overcome
Best line;
Xander; You're sitting here alone looking like you've been diagnosed with cancer of the puppy
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death; poor Eddie. Buffy says it's been a 'Slay-heavy summer'.
Shot;
no Scoobies but the vamp tranqulised at the end
Tied up;
No but Eddie's favourite book is 'Of human bondage'
Knocked out;
No although Riley says he has a slight concussion
Women good/men bad;
Professor Welch considers herself the 'evil bitch monster of death'. Sunday tells Buffy she 'fights like a girl' (which is maybe why Buffy beats her?)
Jeez!;
The idea of Sunday and co not only killing the weaker students but mocking them is awful.
Kinky dinky;
Buffy thinks 'Of human bondage' is porn which she's 'trying to cut down on'. Xander spent the summer working in a male strip club kitchen (and possibly on stage?) Read a great fanfic once where Wes pays for his motorcycle by working in the same club under the stage name 'Huge Grant'. Buffy compares Giles to Hugh Hefner and he now has the lovely Olivia as his own girl next door. Buffy thinks Giles shouldn't have a private life because he's old and it's gross which is a bit of a blow for Guffy. When Xander is all alone he sometimes wonders what Buffy is wearing. Willow compares learning to a sexual act
Calling Captain Subtext;
Xander and Oz don't hug because they're too manly. Buffy comments that she hopes her mum has a 'funny aneurysm' which is foreshadowing indeed as is the reference to Joan Armatrading's 'Once more with feeling'.
Guantanamo Bay;

Scoobies to the ER;
No, Buffy's arm is hurt but not broken (and even if it was would heal pretty quickly)
Where's Dawn?
Interesting scene where Buffy goes home to find Joyce is storing stuff in her room. You wonder why she didn't put it in Dawn's room which isn't occupied yet?

Questions and observations;
Interestingly Buffy hasn't accepted Christ as her personal saviour, the series has always had an ambiguous relationship with Christianity. Five Scoobies at this stage, Buffy, Giles, Xander, Willow and Oz. Buffy shows great tactical awareness, Faith or Kendra might have fought to the death even when they know it's hopeless, Buffy retreats, get's reinforcements and defeats the bad guys. Great gag where Buffy answers the phone, we know it's actually Angel phoning just to hear her voice. Buffy just walks into Giles, doesn't even knock.
Marks out of 10; 6/10 I think although that might be a little generous

 

Living Conditions

The Good;
Kathy is a wonderful character and I wish we'd seen her again (the actress later turns up as recurring character in Desperate Housewives, the nurse who accidentally kills Carlos' mother). I was genuinely suprised that she was a demon, I thought Buffy was going nuts (great performance from SMG, amazing what a little eye-shadow can do). The fight between the 2 at the end and the argument between Kathy and her dad is terrific. The final gag is excellent too although Buffy's scarf makes her look a lot like Joyce when she's had her operation.
The Bad;
Exactly how long would it have taken the demons to work out that Buffy wasn't Kathy?
Best line;
Kathy; I just wanted to make sure we didn't have a thief or somthing?
Buffy; Like who? Sid the wiley dairy gnome?
but I also like Oz; 'On the plus side you killed the bench which was looking shifty' and 'No one deserves mime'
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death; none
Shot;
Tied up;
Buffy is netted and tied up by Xander, Oz and Giles. They need to work on their Boy Scout skills though (Buffy's been tied up and escaped countless times and I'm sure escapology must be part of Slayer training?)
Knocked out;
Yep, Oz and Xander by Buffy
Women good/men bad;
Patriarchical demons not letting their daughters go to college. On the other hand it seems that Hank still helps out with Buffy's tuition.
Jeez!;
Kathy slamming the phone into Buffy's face is gruesome yet oddly funny
Kinky dinky;
Xander wonders why Giles doesn't have any manacles like any self-respecting bachelor? Both Oz and Xander admire Parker's 'driveby' hitting on Buffy.
Calling Captain Subtext;
Kathy puts the moves on Parker much to Buffy chagrin. Buffy and Willow end up in the end being roomates. And here is Veruca for the first time, the little scene between her and Oz subtle but incredibly significant. Willow refers to Parker as the cutie-patootie once again casting her as Bi rather than gay. Willow refers to Giles as their 'grown up friend' but not in a creepy way.
Guantanamo Bay;

Scoobies to the ER;
Buffy isn't hurt despite the no-holds barred thrashing she and Kathy give each other
Where's Dawn?
Kathy comments that Buffy has always been an only child, well not always. She also says she and Buffy are like sisters, well Dawn and Buff fight too and Dawn turns out not to be what she seems

Questions and observations;
Giles reads Scooter and Motorbike magazine, did he sell Wes his? A funny but pretty slight ep with some good performances from the leads. I think season 4 is just taking a little time to find it's feet.
Marks out of 10; 6/10, a slight ep but a cracker, funny and interesting.

 

The Harsh Light of Day

The Good;
Spike's back and the series is better off with him in it. Our first sign that Harmony survived graduation and is now a vamp. Great fight and some excellent comedy, especially love Spike's workers groaning when Harmony starts bleating on about France again. Also like Parker's complaining about guys who are so 'Dark and brooding, give me love'. Nice reveal of Spike
The Bad;
None, good ep, best of season 4 so far

Best line;
Buffy; 'Spike, with Harmony. What you lose a bet?'
but I also like Willow (on Harmony being a vamp) 'She must be dying without a reflection'
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
nope, the guy Spike and Harmony bite at the party survives and we see Asian Joe again in 'Pangs' so the Scoobs obviously rescue him.
Shot;
Tied up;
Asian Joe chained to the wall.
Knocked out;
Xander in the fight with Spike
Women good/men bad;
The final scene with a broken hearted Buffy, Anya and Harmony all miserable having been dumped. Xander remarks that he's 'Actually turning into a woman as he's saying this' when hesitating before the offer of casual sex with a beautiful girl. But as he says 'Still more romantic than Faith'. Spike and Harmony have an abusive relationship but in fairness to Spike she seems just as bad as he is and even more manipulative.
Jeez!;
Spike's 'trash-talk' with Buffy whilst fighting her (he should know better!)
Kinky dinky;
Harmony may be dumb but she knows how to get what she wants. She hints that she and Spike have bondage, S&M and exhibitionist sex. Anya does a striptease for Xander (cue juice gag!) and brings black condoms for their coitus. Parker and Buffy have sex but he dumps her afterwards. Harmony seems to have a thing for Antonio Banderas. Spike comments that he loves syphilis more than he does Harmony. Xander dreams of being naked at the Walmart. Willow seems to want to know the details of Buffy and Parker's night of passion, not graphically but as a 'blurry watercolour'.
Calling Captain Subtext;
Harmony wants to bite Willow. Maybe there was an underlying attraction between the 2 all these years? Parker suggests Buffy and Spike used to go out and she laughs.
Guantanamo Bay;
The gang threaten Harmony to try and find Spike.
Scoobies to the ER;
Xander is hurt in the final fight but not too badly. Willow needs a band-aid.
Where's Dawn?

Questions and observations;
Where season 4 kicks into gear really, quite marvellous. Willow becomes the 3rd Scooby to be bitten by a vampire (Buffy twice by Angel and the Master, Angel and Joyce by Darla although the latter is not a Scooby). Buffy still has the scar from where she was bitten but is that from The Master or Angel? Personally I never know what to make of Parker, Buffy seems to think their sex is the beginning of a relationship whilst it's casual to him. I don't think he's a bad guy really. Giles never locks his door and owns a TV which disappoints Oz who nevertheless seems to appreciate his vinyl albums just as Joyce did in Band Candy. Good music, especially like 'Lucky' (for the Buffy/Parker sex scene) and the interestingly titled 'Faith in love'. Asian Joe, the guy who is chained to Spike's wall is a recurring extra as a Sunnydale High School student (Harmony comments she used to have a class with him), you can see him in many eps but most prominently in Earshot where Buffy hears him thinking about being a 'software gillionaire'. Unfortunately the last appearance of Devon in the series although he's mentioned in Something Blue
Marks out of 10; 8/10, very good

 

Fear Itself

The Good;
Buffy does a Halloween ep once every couple of years and it's always special, this is no exception. The Scoobies face and overcome their fears and the final gag is fantastic. Also love the postmodern gag of Buffy hitting the demon only to find out it's a guy in a Halloween mask (presumably a student rather than a local who'd know better).
The Bad;
Would the Scoobies ever really watch horror films like Phantasm? Don't they get enough gore?
Best line;
Giles; "Actual size!"
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Only the guy who breaks his neck falling dow the stairs
Shot;
Tied up;
Knocked out;
Women good/men bad;
Jeez!;
What's the story with the girl in the tiara on the couch who appears dead then grins maniacally at the camera?
Kinky dinky;
The frat boys think Halloween is all about 'getting laid'. Interestingly Willow's crush Tina Fey in her film Mean Girls says it's all about allowing girls to dress up in slutty male-fantasy costumes whilst keeping their reputation intact. Buffy gets grabbed all over by the hands in the cellar (anyone else reminded of the Evil Dead series) and was I the only one to think 'Boy you can see up her skirt' when Buffy crushes the demon at the end?

Calling Captain Subtext;
Willow "What is college for if not experimentation?" Hmmmm? She also begs "Oz don't leave me"
Guantanamo Bay;

Scoobies to the ER;
Buffy cut but not too badly
Where's Dawn?
Adore the scene with Buffy and Joyce it's so precious. You wonder what costume Dawn wore trick or treating? Is Joyce taking her this year? Joyce comments that she's not the social butterfly she used to be in LA, as we see in Buffy; The Movie. She now knows that Ted was a robot (as Dawn does in IWMTLY).

Questions and observations;
The first sign of Anya's bunny phobia. The first encounter between the Scoobies and The Initiative (aside from Out of Sight, Out of Mind?). Anya comments that it's been a week since she and Xander had sex so we must assume that each ep in the Buffyverse is a week in real time. Uncle Rory mentioned again and Willow is still scared of spiders which she overcomes by the time of Selfless. The guiding spell that goes wrong for her is reminiscent of the one Tara uses successfully in Bargaining pt2. Xander uses the old 'Standing right here' Scooby line. At least Anya knocks on Gile's door which is progress. The ghouls at the frat party are very Evil Dead
Read an interesting fanfic once where Michael Myers from the Halloween series shows up in season 3 Sunnydale and kills Joyce and Faith. In the follow-up story however the Nerd Trio capture him and use his blood to bring them back to life, I think the author's point being that heroism and villainy is sometimes just a question of timing and circumstances (which you can certainly make the case for with characters such as Andrew, Amy, Faith etc?)
Marks out of 10; 6/10

 

Beer Bad

The Good;
Okay there is some, Willow's Jerry Springer style confession (anyone ever read the hilarious Buffy Springer Show fanfic? http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3015874/1/Buffyspringer). Much of the Xander the bartender stuff is funny. Giles describing caveBuffy as walking with a 'sideways limp'. Willow's confrontation with Parker. Buffy's great dream sequence (is that chocolate chip cookie dough fudge he's holding?)
The Bad;
Everything else, possibly the worst Buffy episode ever?

Best line;
Xander; "Nothing can defeat, THE PENIS!" (how true!)
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Nope, no one dies at all
Shot;
Tied up;
Knocked out;
Yep, Willow, Xander (and Parker)
Women good/men bad;
The first thing the cavemen do is find a pair of pretty girls and drag them back to their 'cave'. Buffy's mooning after Parker does her no favours, he's treated her badly so she still wants him? When it comes to Parker and Buffy I always wonder what if the roles were reversed, if Buffy dumped Parker and then when she changes her mind and tries to apologise he knocks her out? What would we think then? And in fairness Parker does go to help Willow when the cavemen attack.
Jeez!;
Kinky dinky;
Is it just me or does anyone else deep down want Parker to succeed in 'jumping Willow's bones'? And then mid-coitus she should turn the tables on him American Pie style. "Say my name bitch!". Also Willow seems to think that Buffy had group sex with the 4 students, love the way her mind works! Buffy calls herself a slut, Veruca thinks Willow is a groupie.
Calling Captain Subtext;
Willow tells Parker she's 'Tired of you men and your manliness'. CaveBuffy thinks Xander smells nice
Guantanamo Bay;
Parker tries to apologise to Buffy so she bashes him over the head with a lump of wood
Scoobies to the ER;
Where's Dawn?
Apparently Joyce always said beer was evil which is weird when you see teenage Joyce in Band Candy and considering she wanted Buffy to be at a college with boys and keg parties?
Questions and observations;
Quite possibly the worst ever episode of Buffy although rewatching it is does have some quite good humour in it and SMG gives a tremendous performance as Cavegirl Buffy. Feels like an ep of Charmed. Again, not sure about Parker, he doesn't actually do anything wrong, he just doesn't want a relationship with her as he explains to Willow (in many ways he reminds me of Barney from 'How I Met Your Mother'). Willow compares Veruca to Faith (not a compliment in her book) Oz's growing attraction to her is clear to see.
Marks out of 10; 4/10

 

Wild at Heart
The Good;
If you have tears in your heart please prepare to shed them now, terrific performances from AH and SG. Spike is also fantastic.
The Bad;
The werewolf makeup hasn't any got any better.

Best line;
Willow; "Oz don't you love me?"
Oz; "My whole life I've never loved anything else"
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Buffy nails another vamp. Oz kills Veruca
Shot;
Oz tranqulised again whilst Spike get's zapped by the Initiative.
Tied up;
No but Oz and Veruca have cage sex.
Knocked out;
Oz and Spike although he's not a Scooby for another couple of seasons.
Women good/men bad;
Actually here we actually have 2 females fighting over their man. Note Willow can't go through with her spell. Willow asks Xander for some advice from the Y side of things but may regret it as he defines love as either 'Wild-monkey-love' or 'Tender-Sarah Machachlan love' (who provides some of the musisc for the series).
Jeez!;
Kinky dinky;
Werewolf sex! Plenty of backscratching there! Veruca even says 'I like it rough'. Also Veruca parading around in a black lace bra and Willow attempting to dress more rock chick. Xander's mum won't let him put a lock on the door in case he starts having 'The sex'. Too late! Even Giles considers Veruca 'Quite striking' as indeed does Xander to judge by his expression. Xander thinks there are only 7 minutes a year where a guy isn't thinking about sex. Buffy is sure that Oz is 'flogging and punishing himself'. Oz blushes behind the ears when he's attracted to someone.
Calling Captain Subtext;
The scene with the speaker discussion is so laden with subtext, it might as well be Jane Austen, Willow feeling she's being frozen out. Buffy later tells Willow she loves her.
Guantanamo Bay;
Scoobies to the ER;
Where's Dawn?
You wonder what Dawn's attitude to Oz was?
Questions and observations;
Goodbye to Oz as a regular character which is a shame as he was terrific, he's sorely missed. But it does leave room for Tara. Buffy seems to be doing well in class, once again she's more than some superpowered bimbo. Is the stuff in Xander's basement salvaged from the vamp's house from 'The Freshman'? Oddly Prof Walsh doesn't recognise werewolves when she sees them. Giles' watches ganeshows rather than PBS. All the Scoobies at one time or another have walked in on their beloved whilst they were cheating except for Giles who walked in on Jenny when she was dead. Buffy has often been accused of constantly falling for diversionary tactics but here she figures out Veruca's ruse.
Marks out of 10; 8/10

 

The Initiative
The Good;
So at last the truth! The Initiative set is indeed impressive and Spike's escape is daring, he's almost like Jaws in the Bond films, the audience starts rooting for him even when he's the bad guy. The fights also good and the Harmony/Spike scenes and Harmony/Xander scene is wonderful
The Bad;
Not a great deal, strong ep

Best line;
Buffy (to Walsh); "For someone who teaches human behaviour you might try showing some"
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Shot;
Buff uses a flare gun, odd to see her using a firearm of any kind. The Initiative seem to have more guns than NATO.
Tied up;
Spike tied up but escapes.
Knocked out;
Willow in the struggle with Riley and co.
Women good/men bad;
The horrible scene where we think Spike is killing Willow. Of course, she then fights back, You go girl! Contrast that to Harmony who takes Spike back AGAIN after all he's done to her. She asks Xander why men just leave but of course by that stage Xander already has. Buffy is outraged at Riley's seeming chauvanism towards her. Parker's remark about Buffy is unforgiveable although maybe he has a right to be bitter, he did try to apologise to her only for her to bash him over the head with a branch.
Jeez!;
Walsh's remark to Willow about Oz is very harsh. For a moment your heart is in your mouth when you think Willow is lying dead behind Spike on the bed.
Kinky dinky;
Buffy describes her top as 'slutty' but I don't think it is particularly. Unlike her top on the cafeteria which you can blatantly see down when she trips. Forrest eyes up the women in the cafeteria, the first blonde girl in the floral number in particular is undeniably HOT! Parker describes Buffy as 'Bunny in the sack'. You figure she must have gone easy on him? Forrest figures that Buffy and Xander are on their way to have 'Crazy naked sex'. Harmony comments that she can 'slap Spike around' a little if he likes it. Buffy dancing is also good although she's better with Faith.
Calling Captain Subtext;
Doug Petrie describes the Initiative boys as a 'gay calender pin-up' and he's not wrong, you can imagine Jack from Will&Grace having it on his wall. Petrie seems very keen on Marc Blucas in his commentary although he was equally as keen on the Faith/Buffy sapphic subtext.
The whole Spike/Willow scene is one big impotence gag. Once again a vamp feeding is compared to a sexual act. Harmony comments that Buffy is just going to slap Spike around and that she can do that. Is that why Spike falls in love with the Slayer? When Spike finds Buffy on the computer he says 'Hello gorgeous". Hmmmmm. Will still has some insecurity left over from her wallflower days.
Guantanamo Bay;
The whole idea of the Initiative is very 'War on Terror', it resembles Camp X-ray to a T. Of course this all takes place BEFORE 9/11
Scoobies to the ER;
Thankfully not this week
Where's Dawn?
Questions and observations;
Spike likes the Sex Pistols, big suprise. Buffy likes cheese, a leftover from her day as a rat? Here we have Spike in the opening credits hinting that he's a regular from now on (by contrast it took poor old Tara 3 seasons to get there and she only lasted 1 ep). Giles comments that he should lock his door. Spike refers to the Nazis conducting experiments on vamps which we'll see in 'Why we Fight'. Xander refers to the mobile infantry from Starship Troopers, Riley not unlike Johnny Rico in many ways. Spike is 126 which means he was born in 1873, making him a late Victorian (Angel is over 200 making him a Georgian). Note Doug Petrie named Grahme Miller after a Canadian friend of his and that it's Grhame who suggests that Buffy might be a little off because she's Canadian. Spike seems to use significant violence during his escape but maybe the chip hasn't really kicked in yet? Riley' shirt makes him look like he's from Star Trek.
Marks out of 10; 8/10

 

Pangs

The Good;
The siege of Fort Giles and Buffy's cooking preparations are both excellent. Love Buffy's stetson hat and the Xander digging scene plus the Angel lurking scenes. Favourite though has to be the Scooby cavalry riding to the rescue.
The Bad;
In all the dodgy lessons I've learnt from Buffy perhaps the most disturbing is the idea that when threatened by the vengful spirit of a wronged Native American tribe the solution is to wipe them out entirely so you don't have to worry about them any more.

Best line;
Spike; "You won, alright? You came in and killed them and took their land....The history of the world isn't people making friends. You had better weapons and you massacred them. End of story". Of course Spike is a Victorian, the days when (as Blackadder the 4th put it) "You saw a bloke in a grass skirt you shot him and nicked his country"
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
The priest, the professor, the poor guy captured by the vamps. Buffy kills Hus.
Shot;
Buffy hit by an arrow as is Spike
Tied up;
Spike to the chair
Knocked out;
Women good/men bad;
Harmony smartens herself up and kicks Spike out, about time too! Whenever you get the die-hard Spikettes I always think they resemble Harmony a lot more than Buffy or Dru.
Jeez!;
The poor priest! Hung and has his ear cut off not to mention the professor having her throat slit. Spike considers pictures of famine victims funny, not suprising from a soulless vamp but amazed they left it in. Angel snapping the warrior's neck is also pretty cringeworthy.
Kinky dinky;
Anya get's turned on by Xander performing manual labour. Buffy comments that imaginary Xander is 'quite the machine' (she should talk!). Anya also likes the idea of playing nurse for Xander as indeed does Buffy for Riley later and for Angel in both seasons 2 and 3. Xander proposes sex with Anya at the end of the ep by commenting that his syphilis has cleared up. Buffy says she likes her men 'evil', in Get It Done we find out why.
Calling Captain Subtext;
Spike compares his inability to kill as akin to being neutered, do we need any more evidence that to vamps biting equals sex? Buffy observes that Xander looks quite Village People. Well, he's been a soldier, construction worker, cowboy, leather clad vamp and this ep is filled with native americans. Just sailor, and cop to go really?
Guantanamo Bay;
The Scoobies are quite prepared to let Spike broil
Scoobies to the ER;
Poor Xander getting syphilis amongst other diseases
Where's Dawn?
Presumably gone to Aunt Arlenes with Joyce. Arlene must be Joyce's sister rather than Hanks?
Questions and observations;
Xander has previously been working at Hot-Dog-on-a stick which is where Snyder suggested Buffy work in season 3. He gives the rest of the Scoobs freebies as will Buff at the DMP. Giles and Angel have put their differences behind them. Anya doesn't seem to have met Angel before despite them having been in the same room together in Dopplegangland and The Prom. Buffy seems to have inkling that Angel is near, her vamp sense or something stronger? Buffy comments how one person can make a difference, certainly Dopplegangland proves that. Asian Joe has obviously survived the events of Harsh Light of Day and is in the stands at the ceremony. Sunnydale has been around since 1812 so before the Mayor was around. Still plenty of Anya and Will tension. Why does Riley cam-up his face but not his neck? Xander refers to Anya as his girlfriend. Note the sign saying US Army over Angel's head when Riley is talking to Buffy. Hus rather reminds me of an old ep of the TV series Kolchak;The Night Stalker which apparently inspired the X-files. In fairness to Custer he was actually a lot more sympathectic to the Native Americans than most.
Marks out of 10; 9/10 I really like this one, perhaps one of the strongest of season 4

 

Something Blue

The Good;
The ep to put joy into the hearts of Spuffers everywhere. Brilliantly funny with some emotional resonance with Willow and Xander and Anya's relationship taking a step forwards. Plus AMY! Nice little touches too like Giles' 'Kiss the librarian' mug
The Bad;
Some of the demons look a bit ropey. Why does Willow's spell on the other's work instantly but Giles only becomes progressively blind?
Best line;
Xander; "What? How? What?"
Giles; "3 excellent questions?"
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Shot;
Tied up;
Spike chained in the bathtub
Knocked out;
Women good/men bad;
Buffy comments that her dad isn't too far away which means they're not estranged yet
Jeez!;
Anya says that she used to do spells to give men 'Boils on the penis'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kinky dinky;
Buffy teasing a chained up Spike with her neck. Plus naked Amy. Xander tells Anya to consider his lips the 'fruit roll ups of love'. Willow shakes her booty on the dancefloor. Willow comments on all the demons who are attracted to Xander. Buffy ponders her attraction to dark relationships? Xander pictures her in Raquel Welsh's bucksin bikini from 1 Million Year BC. D'Hoffryn strokes Will's face (he seems to consider his female demons akin to his daughters?)
Calling Captain Subtext;
Note it's Spike who notices that Willow is still in pain. Perhaps William the Bloody;sensitive poet isn't totally gone after all? Spike's 'little brother' jealousy of Angel is still evident. Riley helps out the UC Sunnydale Lesbian Alliance by hanging their banner up and tells Buffy that he's a lesbian (he wishes!). Willow agrees that Riley has good arms (another tick in the Bi box)
Guantanamo Bay;
Scoobies to the ER;
Where's Dawn?
Presumably returned with Buffy from visiting their dad in LA. Buffy doesn't seem to get around to telling Dawn and Joyce about her engagement.
Spike seems to cast aspersions on Joyce's naming of Buffy which is weird as he normally thinks the world of her.
Questions and observations;
Hugely funny, nice to see that Willow mourning her loss of Oz hasn't just been forgotten about. A step forwards for Spike and D'hoffryn back again. Buffy again refers to her not being the greatest driver. Willow still has the pics at the peir from season 3 of Buffy. Buffy kills one vamp and Xander drowns a demon. Buffy says that they may be into a forgetting spell later and indeed in season 6 they are.
Marks out of 10; 8/10

 

Hush
The Good;
Everything, it's all staggeringly brilliant. If I was to name a favourite scene it would be when Forrest and Riley are stuck in the lift about to be gassed, Riley's desperately trying to remember the overide code and Forrest holds up a piece of paper on which he's written 'C'mon! C'mon!', makes me laugh every time. Also love Gile's slideshow, the final battle and Olivia. The Gentlemen's applause.
The Bad;
Naught. Ok, when Spike get's his mug of blood from the fridge it's full up but then he takes a sip from it and it's almost empty
Best line;
Not the ep for that
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
At least 6 people have their hearts gorily cut out
Shot;
Tied up;
Spike to the chair
Knocked out;
Women good/men bad;
When Anya starts to complain about Xander's insensitivity towards her he comments "Boy you really did turn into a girl, didn't you?". Love Buffy's horrified reaction to Giles' drawing of her and her exasperated look as Riley smashes the wrong thing. The scene with the Wicca group, a bunch of 'wanna blessed be's' is hilarious(when the Charmed sisters did this they ended up dancing naked with them around the fire I recall? Shame we don't get that here). .
Jeez!;
The scene where the Gentlemen hold the guy down and slice his heart out, yeeesh! We don't actually see anything but Giles' slideshow doesn't leave much to the imagination. Also Spike's V sign to Xander. Buffy breaks guy's wrists and henchmens neck.
Kinky dinky;
The return of Olivia, Giles' 'orgasm friend'. Unfortunately this seems to be the end for them. Anya's crude hand gesture to Xander at the end, Xander seems to think that the Gentlemen are after 'boobies'. In fairness, everyone seems perplexed by Buffy's hand gesture. Spike says he doesn't want to be tied to a chair whilst Xander and Anya 'shag'.
Calling Captain Subtext;
And here's Tara. Personally I for one thought the subtext between her and Willow was evident right from the beginning, just the look on Willow's face at the end of their final scene together when she calls her 'special'. Xander thinks Spike would bite him as he's 'moist and delicious'. The awesome dream sequence is great, the little girl I think is quite obviously Buffy as a child. All very Nightmare on Elm Street. Remember reading a great fanfic where Buffy and Anya are killed by Freddy Kreuger but in the end he wakes up from his dream screaming, chained to his bed in the mental hospital he's been confined to since the night he got torched. But after the nurse sedates him she walks away and we discover she's actually Buffy.
Spike calls Giles a 'sissy'. Forrest says that he and Riley are 'pretty' and suggests Riley 'get with the kissing'. Giles hugs Willow.
Guantanamo Bay;
The Initiative/Town authorities cover up the Gentlemen's activities by declaring a laryngitis outbreak.
Scoobies to the ER;
Buffy get's stabbed with the scalpel but just seems to shrug it off.
Where's Dawn?
Quietly at home with Joyce
Questions and observations;
Just terrific, one of the Buffy eps that just sets the standard for all others, Joss at his finest. Isn't it a bit much though for Buffy to automatically assume she's the princess? Finally spotted Andy Hallet in the dream sequence, he's sitting two seats behind SMG with a dark haired girl sat in front of him. The little girl declares that you 'Can't call to mom', foretelling Joyce's death? Equally when Riley in the dream turns into a Gentleman is he revealing his hidden side?
Spike is now allowed to roam around loose. The Wicca group refer to the 'wolf at our side' which Oz used to be. Will makes good cookies so why should she be opposed to the bakesale? The clocktower scene is very Tim Burton right down to the music. Tara trips like a true horror heroine. Nice twist with Willow's door. Buffy kills 8 Gentlemen and one henchman. Pink Floyd are a Cambridge group whilst Giles went to Oxford.
Marks out of 10; 10/10

 

Doomed
The Good;
Some good fights and character advancement and some excellent comedy. Favourite bit off all has to be Spike's 'American' accent (all the more brilliant when you think that this is an American playing an English character playing an American)
The Bad;
Riley says the demon is 3 metres tall which would make it nearly ten feet and seems way too much (drug dealers aside americans never did learn to use the metric system). He estimates it at 120kgs. How exactly? Buffy's leap down the Hellmouth beggars belief but maybe the laws of physics work differently there.
Best line;
Giles; It's the end of the world
Xander/Willow; Again!
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
One dead guy at party
Shot;
Tied up;
Knocked out;
Giles again
Women good/men bad;
Poor Willow, inadvertently wounded by Percy at the party.
Jeez!;
Willow lying in the guys blood and the symbol carved into his chest
Kinky dinky;
The partygoers want to play 'naked limbo'. Riley says his skin is 'humming'. He also says he's not going to 'force himself upon' Buffy.
Calling Captain Subtext;
Spike calls Xander a poof.
Guantanamo Bay;
Scoobies to the ER;
Where's Dawn?
Apocalypses; 5, the demons want to open the Hellmouth
Questions and observations;
Percy back, hooray. Last time we'll see him unfortunately. Xander is now a pizza delivery boy just as Cordy predicted. Interesting that just as Spike says, Willow and Xander at the end are still the High School Nerds watching TV in their basement. Oddly enough Giles tries to 'Scully' Buffy both in this ep and in Hush. Marc Blucas appears in the titles for the first time. In many ways this is making the point that Xander and Willow are still the geeks they were in High School, Willow is lost at the party, she doesn't have Oz any more and doesn't have Tara yet. Reputedly the scene where Buffy objects to Giles' drawing of her was actually improvised by the cast.
Riley says they track demons by their phermones, very like how Adam Baldwin's MiB's track the alien in Predator 2. Buffy refers to Faith and says that Slayers don't live past 25 (she and Faith both have now, they're the most successful Slayers ever). It's actually Xander who figures out the demons are the sacrifices. Quite a long ep coming in at 42 minutes (Amends is the longest at nearly 43).
Marks out of 10; 6/10, nothing wrong with it but it comes after a very strong couple of eps

 

For me, like the Buffy Musical episode, Hush is one of those things that people praise to the skies (didn't it win some award?), but which leaves me saying "meh" at best and "pretentious claptrap" more often than not. Hush strikes me as being forced artsiness.

 

Really? I just picture Joss trying to sell the concept to the executives;

"Ok, so in half the episode there's no dailogue at all"
"Didn't silent films go out in the 20s?"

 

A New Man

The Good;
Everything with demon Giles but I also adore the scene where Giles and Ethan get drunk together.
The Bad;
Couldn't Giles just write 'I am Giles' on a big piece of paper? Or is the point that he's too embarrassed?
Best line;
Walsh; We thought you were a myth
Buffy; Well you were myth-taken.
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Shot;
Tied up;
Knocked out;
Giles comments that he has a tendency to get knocked on the head.
Women good/men bad;
Jeez!;
Mucus!
Kinky dinky;
Giles comments that Ethan and Giles are older than him and 'Not as attractive'. Riley says that he likes it when Buffy is in charge.
Calling Captain Subtext;
The whole Giles/Walsh scene and him scaring her later. Willow and Tara's rose magic session is filled with Sapphic hints. Giles calls the Initiative commandos 'nancy'
Giles thinks Ethan is telling him he's very attractive. He's actually talking to the waitress but I know what we all thought for a moment.
Guantanamo Bay;
The Initiative are tapped into the emergency telephone system and Riley has a key to open every shop in Sunnydale. He also has the power to haul Ethan off to indefinite detention at the end of the ep. Again this is all pre-War on Terror, Joss appears pretty prescient.
Scoobies to the ER;
Where's Dawn?
How did she and Joyce celebrate Buffy's birthday?
Missing scenes;
Loved to have seen this;
Waitress (looking at Ethan's note) "You're not Roger Moore!"
Ethan; "Yes I am. Tell her Ripper"
Giles (drunkenly) "What? Oh, he's not Roger Moore"
Apocalypses; 5, Riley comments that he needs to learn the plural
Questions and observations;
Unfortunately the last time we'll see Ethan Rayne although he does return in the comics. Very nice to have a Giles-centric episode as we haven't had one in a while. Riley has personally killed 11 vamps and 6 demons. According to Boo's figures however here's the rest of the scoobs.
Kills:
Buffy: 74 vamps, 26 demons, 5 monsters, 3 humans, 1 werewolf, 1 spirit warrior & a robot
Giles: 5 vamps, 1 demon
Cordy: 3 vamps, ½ a demon
Will: 4 vamps
Angel: 3 vamps, 1 demon, 1 human
Oz: 3 vamps, 1 zombie
Faith: 16 vamps, 5 demons, 3 humans
Xander: 5 vamps, 2 zombies, ½ a demon, ½ a demon
Anya: ½ a demon
As Buffy birthday's go this one is actually pretty successful? But does anyone really ever get suprise parties like that? I heard that Robin Sachs is actually an expert martial artist and that Peter O'Toole's wife left her husband for him. Anya still working on her humanity, Buffy refers to Riley as her boyfriend for the first time. First hints of something sinister in the Initiative. Tara back, yay! Byebye to Giles' Citreon. Magic shop again. We already see that Buffy won't blindly follow orders like Riley will. The motel Ethan stays in looks the same one as Faith used to stay at.

Marks out of 10; 7/10

 

THE I IN TEAM
The Good;
Prof Walsh gets her just desserts, Riley and Buffy are finally a couple, some nice comedy, Willow especially looks like a troll doll with the ionisation spell. Anya and Spike becoming more and more Scoobyish. Love the Buffy in the briefing scene.
The Bad;
Weak demons and the first appearance of Adam, worst big bad ever.
Best line;
Buffy; Don't worry, I've patrolled in this halter top many times
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death; Byebye Prof Walsh you psycho!
Shot; Buffy uses the blaster but it doesn't work
Tied up;
Knocked out;
Women good/men bad;
No, female villain, Walsh the mother gone bad
Jeez!;
Quite a shock when she gets stuck, still!
Kinky dinky;
Anya notes that she and Xander have 'enjoyed spanking'. Buffy intends to punish Riley for having a twinkie for lunch. Willow is upset that she's not being spanked too which puts her remarks about her and Oz playing 'mistress of pain' into a new context. For Buffy and Riley fighting seems to be akin to foreplay, maybe Buffy is more like Faith than she likes to admit? (see 'Get It Done)' Meanwhile Prof Walsh plays the voyeur, spying on her boys in their bedrooms. At least Buffy doesn't wake to find her lover gone as she did on the 2 previous occasions.
Calling Captain Subtext;
Willow's yellow t-shirt has the word 'fairy' on it. Check out Forrest's jealous attitude about Buffy and Riley, you'd almost think there was something a little 'don't ask, don't tell' between them. Spike remarks that Giles is womanly. Giles wonders if there is a higher purpose in Spike's neutering which indeed there turns out to be.
Guantanamo Bay;
Scoobies to the ER;
Where's Dawn?
Does Buffy get her and Joyce out of town if she belives the Initiative might be hunting for them?
Missing scenes;
Apocalypses; 5,
Questions and observations;
Buffy asks if the Initiative have jetpacks? Well, the Nerds will have them by season 6. Didn't Buffy have a pager in 'Never kill a boy on a first date'? (What exactly was her excuse for that? You'd assume she was either a doctor, a drug dealer or prostitute, she certainly doesn't look like the former 2).Xander's fruit bars introduce Anya to capitalism. Poor Will feels a little left out but at least now has Tara to go to. Buffy is keener on the Initiative than the others but it not only means she gets to see more of Riley but that she might live a lot longer and not be dead by 25 like all the other slayers? Why does Graham hit Spike with a tracker rather than a tranquiliser? Buffy kills two more demons, demons that it took 8 armed to the teeth commandos to subdue. The tracker scene has a very Aliens/Predator2 feel to it.
Marks out of 10; 7/10

 

GOODBYE IOWA
The Good;
Some great acting from Marc Blucas as Riley comes apart. Love Buffy's rallying speech in her sushi pyjamas and Riley recognising Spike.
The Bad;
A pretty dull episode in many ways, Adam is a stupid enemy. I always said that the more Joyce in an ep the better it is, well, the more Adam in an ep the worse it is. The idea that he had a floppy disc player in 2001, really! Also the little boy he kills is the dumbest kid ever.
Best line;
Anya; "He was GI Joe for one night, it wasn't as if he was in The Nam"
Wheldon Cliches;

Character death;
Byebye another Initiative scientist and some poor MP
Shot;
No but Riley threatens one of Willy's patrons with his pistol.
Tied up;
Knocked out;
Women good/men bad;
Jeez!;
Cutting the demons arm off, nice!
Kinky dinky;
Trying to remain inconspicuous Xander tried to kiss Buffy.
Calling Captain Subtext;
Buffy, Willow and Anya spend the night in bed together. Amazed if the slashficcers didn't make great play of that! Upon seeing the Initiative Xander asks if he can have sex with Riley too. So, why does Tara ruin Will's demon hunting spell? One day we'll find out. Spike comments that Buffy has tragic taste in men, foreshadowing indeed.
Guantanamo Bay;
The Initiative are very brazen, charging around in Humvees, guns blazing. Buffy hits Willy but at his own request, the last time he'll be seen in the series.
Scoobies to the ER;
Riley goes cold turkey and gets stabbed.
Where's Dawn?
Missing scenes;
Apocalypses; 5,
Questions and observations;
Giles still has his Mark of Eyghon tattoo, you'd think he'd want rid of it? In the scene where Riley and Buffy meet at the murder site the camera goes very funny in places, going octagonal? Spike says he has a cousin who married a Privlops demon but like most of what Spike says he's probably lying.

Marks out of 10; 6/10 Adam is going to drag the scores down for the rest of the season.