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Beyond - Legends An Alliance at Alida's (L/M) ~ Part the 15th -A Pledge and a Promise (update 3-9)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by divapilot, Aug 14, 2006.

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  1. Jade_Pilot

    Jade_Pilot Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 10, 2005
    =D= In the words of my 12 year old son: "WOOT!!!"

    Great update, Sister-pilot! Love the dialogue and the goblet scene. You've got Mara's prickliness (is that a word Mrs. A?) down perfectly.

    Now I'll just wait patiently for Alida's diary update!

    Bravo! =D=
     
  2. Valiowk

    Valiowk Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 23, 2000
    I read "The Keeper of Memories" before this, and was intrigued to see how you first introduced Alida and Bruno. Your stories fit together perfectly! :) I especially liked the different perspectives that you provided to the developing relationship between Luke and Mara.

    The alliteration in the titles is really interesting--I'm looking forward to seeing how you intend to tackle the letter "J". :p Please add me to your PM list!
     
  3. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Jade_Eyes: That whole thing with the water gobblet. Is she going to Nirauan?

    Mebbe?[face_whistling]

    Can he ... tag along?

    Nope. And you?ll see why in a post or two.:p

    She's not invincible but neither is he. Neither is infallible... now I'm doing it. They have to let each other in.

    They are learning how to communicate with each other. It takes a long time to figure that out in a relationship, and Luke and Mara are determined to learn. Each has to give. [:D]

    So tickled to see this updated ... for its own sake. But it also intensifies my longing for Alida's own story to resolve in Memories.

    Thanks! I?m glad you are enjoying both.:D


    Ginchy: I think with the trust, they're halfway there.

    Yes, they are trying. Trust is a big issue in their relationship.o_O

    And very sneaky with the water there, gal. It must be so frustrating to get feelings like that, but not really know what they mean!

    It seems possible to me that if Luke can get full-fledged premonitions and visions, then he could get premonitions of ?feelings? too ? like little mini-visions. Just detached feelings and snapshot glimpses that he can?t fit into context. [face_thinking]

    Luke and Mara are so awkward, yet trying so hard not to be. I guess that's what happens when so much stands between two people.

    But they are trying. Don?t worry, Alida has them figured out. ~[face_batting]~

    Excellent chapter, as always, lady!

    Thank you! And thank you for your wonderful reply. [:D]


    Blue_Milkshake: I wonder, could Mara be headed for Nirauan, or have their dinners at Alida's sent their future down a new path?

    Umm? mebbe[face_whistling]

    Luke helps. That's just what he does. So it would be perfectly natural for him to want to give his aid to Mara. However, help is a four letter word to Mara. It means something completely different to her than what Luke's thinking. She's not broken, so she doesn't need fixing. Luke's offer to help says to Mara that he doesn't understand this. And I think Mara is right--Luke does struggle with the "only I can fix it" syndrome.

    That?s a terrific analysis. That?s exactly it! Luke thinks he is offering something very valuable, and Mara feels that the fact that he offers his help is somehow a slam against her. o_O

    Thank you very much!:D


    RedGold: Oh just kiss already!
    LOL! Not just yet, I?m afraid. But I promise there will be smooching later. :*


    Jade_eyes: Being vulnerable and working as a team does not at all mean she's broken. It doesn't stop you from having a measure of self-reliance either.

    They are trying to meet half-way, but they have a lot of assumptions and habits that they have to get around first.[face_not_talking]


    Rivad_Bacar2: Great update divapilot! I must admit, I've been lurking for some time and enjoying all your posts.

    Well, welcome! I?m glad you delurked![face_dancing]

    I especially like your interpretation of Mara and Luke's friendship. Often people miss that aspect of a relationship in favor of romance, but you balance them both out so well! Bravissime!

    Thank you very much! I think the best romances are also deep friendships, and I believe Luke and Mara truly are best friends. Thanks for the interesting reply.[:D]


    JEDIFLYSWATTER: Must say that Mara is really trying to keep her temper under control over this Jedi training business. Also love the mush between the two. They seem to be creating a strong foundation for a more serious relationship.

    Thank you! Glad you like this story. Consider yourself added to the PM list! [face_dancing]
    Luke and Mara are taking it carefully, but they both understand that it?s worth it. [face_love]

    Wonder if Mara is getting really to point out all of Luke's mistakes and over use of t
     
  4. Klimt_Of_Tornesdal

    Klimt_Of_Tornesdal Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Dec 8, 1999
    Hey diva.

    Gotta say, this is a great read so far. I just sat in one sitting to cover all of it because every update left me wanting more. I've officially OD'ed on mush, and wouldn't have it any other way. I can't wait to see where you take this fic, though I get the feeling it'll be a fun ride. [face_love]
     
  5. Jedi Trace

    Jedi Trace SouthEast RSA star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Dec 15, 1999
    Another wonderful chapter! You know how much I love this dinner conversation. [face_love]


    Maybe somebody will come by just for the pleasure of watching you give me a real thrashing in the sparring room.

    Oh my. That just?sparked a?plot bunny.[face_blush]


    Mara looked at her plate and stabbed at a diced vegetable. ?Can?t we just have a nice dinner together without the recruitment pitch??

    Something about Mara stabbing the vegetable with that statement makes it just pop off the page. Perfect!


    ?Why do you always assume I need your help? It?s as if you see me as having an intrinsic weakness that only you can address,? she said quietly.

    Score: Mara 1, Farmboy 0


    I'm in awe of the dialogue and banter you generate for these two. You?ve got them pegged!:D


    Looking forward to the next part?

    *cough* whichIknowyouhave *cough* ;)


    [face_batting] [face_batting] [face_batting]





     
  6. MsLanna

    MsLanna Jedi Master star 6

    Registered:
    Jul 8, 2005
    *just lurking*
    [face_blush]
     
  7. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Jedi Trace posted:

    Looking forward to the next part?

    *cough* whichIknowyouhave *cough*


    Hmmm. Really? Then I need to add my shameless pleading too. :) :)
     
  8. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Klimt_of_Tornesdal: I just sat in one sitting to cover all of it because every update left me wanting more. I've officially OD'ed on mush, and wouldn't have it any other way. I can't wait to see where you take this fic, though I get the feeling it'll be a fun ride.

    Thank you! I appreciate that! This is a talky little fic, but there?s plenty of room for mush, too.[face_love]


    Jedi_Trace: Another wonderful chapter! You know how much I love this dinner conversation.

    Thanks! And thank you for keeping this fic on the straight and narrow with your beta?ing. [face_dancing]

    Maybe somebody will come by just for the pleasure of watching you give me a real thrashing in the sparring room.

    Oh my. That just?sparked a?plot bunny.


    A plot bunny! Yay! More Jedi_Trace fics!:D

    Mara looked at her plate and stabbed at a diced vegetable. ?Can?t we just have a nice dinner together without the recruitment pitch??

    Something about Mara stabbing the vegetable with that statement makes it just pop off the page.


    Maybe she?s stabbing the vegetable because she?s trying really hard not to stab Luke.[face_shame_on_you]

    I'm in awe of the dialogue and banter you generate for these two. You?ve got them pegged!

    They are trying so hard to understand each other. Each conversation brings them a little closer. [:D]

    Looking forward to the next part? *cough* whichIknowyouhave *cough*

    Yes, I do. Dumb old DRL. But here it is, finally. [face_dancing]


    MsLanna: Welcome in! Lurk away. I?m always happy to have readers. :)


    Jade_Eyes: Then I need to add my shameless pleading too.

    Here you go! Coming right up.:D
     
  9. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Presenting:

    An Alliance at Alida?s ~Part the Eleventh: Jury by Jade

    Thank you, Jedi_Trace, for another very helpful beta! @};-


    [b]Author?s note: [/b] Although this story has been written in response to the Wordy Fic Challenge, starting with this chapter and with the rest of the posts, I will not be using the challenge words. The reason is that this story parallels another story that is also on the boards, and I wish to prevent any spoilers happening in the fics. Thanks to Alley_Skywalker for running the challenge!

    [hr]


    ?Tell me what?s bothering you,? Luke insisted.

    Mara set her teacup down gently, and Luke sensed her hesitation, as if she feared her words would jeopardize their relationship. He watched her through the fragrant steam. ?I don?t think you realize what you are getting into, Luke,? she said quietly.

    He shook his head and shrugged in confusion. ?What? With the Academy? With the Order?? he pressed. ?With us?? he asked, more softly.

    She gesticulated, her slender hand flexing as if grasping for the words out of the air itself. ?No, with yourself,? she said simply.

    Luke put his own mug of hot chocolate down on the table. He pushed his chair back slightly, raised his chin, then crossed his arms. ?I?m listening. What do you think I?m doing wrong??

    ?No, you aren?t. You only say you?re listening, but your body language has shut me out. If you are going to listen to me, then be receptive to what I have to say.?

    Luke rolled his eyes slightly. ?If I wanted psychology tossed at me, I?ll go order a drink from Bruno.?

    Her eyes narrowed and the corner of her mouth pulled back, a sign Luke had come to recognize in the same way a tracker recognizes a viper?s warning rattle. Luke relented and pulled himself closer to the table, loosely folding his hands on the table. ?I?m sorry, Mara. I?ll try to be a better listener. Tell me what you think,? he said.

    ?All right,? she countered. ?I?m telling you this because I?ve noticed some traits about you that I think you should be aware of. Some traits that other people react negatively to. I?m not being critical, Luke. I?m being honest. I?m trying to help.?

    Mara leaned in, a stray strand of hair drifting across her temple. Luke resisted the urge to brush it out of her face and instead refocused on her eyes. Mara paused, and then started again. ?I?ve noticed that you have a tendency to use the Force when you don?t need to. That?s a problem. You seem to turn to the Force first for everything, even things that are completely solvable through normal means. You ought to be more judicious in your use of it.?

    ?The Force is there to be used, Mara. If I?m in touch with it, why ignore it? Why grope around in the dark when there?s a glowstick lying on the ground??

    ?What if the Force is more of a raging torch than a glowstick? What then? Will the fire illuminate or burn?? Mara asked.

    Luke waved his hand diffidently. ?I can control it. I?m growing in the Force all the time.? He smiled at her. ?I appreciate your concern, Mara, but I do, in fact, know what I?m doing.?

    ?Is that your justification for what you?ve been doing these past years? You?re ?growing in the Force??? Mara snapped. ?What is that supposed to mean? Growing what? More powerful? Or more aware? Because, believe me, there?s a difference between controlling something and respecting it.?

    Unexpectedly, Luke felt himself bristle with indignation. He tamped down on the emotion immediately, then took a deep breath. ?I respect the Force,? he said quietly.

    ?I believe you do,? Mara said. ?But you have to respect your own abilities, too. There?s a balance that?s necessary. You can?t be all one way or the other. You have a remarkable gift with the Force, but it should enhance, not replace, your other talents.?

    Luke sat silently, absorbing her words.

    Mara tucked the stray hair behind her ear and continued. ?I?m worried for you. I?ve seen it happen before. Sometimes even people who have no intention of pursuing power will find the taste of i>
     
  10. Jade_Pilot

    Jade_Pilot Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 10, 2005
    Whoa!:eek: That was so intense! Extremely well written, Sister-pilot!

    I can't help but think that Mara can dish it out, but not take it. Although Luke had stopped listening as well.

    Love the line: Luke rolled his eyes slightly. ?If I wanted psychology tossed at me, I?ll go order a drink from Bruno.?

    Bravo! =D=
     
  11. walker_of_minds

    walker_of_minds Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Dec 19, 2006
    This is a wonderful story you really do have Luke and Mara's personalities, the banter perfect. I look forward to reading more and how the two work it out. Luke being stubborn I think ah when emtions are high it is hard to see.
     
  12. ginchy

    ginchy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 25, 2005
    Oh, dear. It has to be said, but it's hard for Luke to hear. He's not quite ready to hear it yet. He and Mara can sure wound one another when they want to. Ouch!

    Terrific update in showing that it's not all smooth sailing yet... =D=
     
  13. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    I can't decide if it was right for Mara to call Luke on his not listening right off--I'm glad she did, but that probably didn't make him open up on the inside, though it appeared on the outside that he was. I agreed 200 percent with every single thing she said. Once you start doing all the wrong things for the right reasons, it's not too far of a baby step to doing the wrong things and not caring what the reasons are. [face_thinking] Breathtaking dialogue. :) Emotional doors have been slammed and I don't know what can open them up again. [face_worried] Both are cussed stubborn [face_frustrated]
    Some things you have to learn by doing and the hard way--but the repercussions of learning the hard way of what Mara was warning about--could be catastrophic. [face_worried]
     
  14. RedGold

    RedGold Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 29, 2004
    great chapter! but do'h now we're back to square one...
     
  15. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Re: RedGold's reference to square one... eep! Add to that the wounding words that were spoken Eep!! How many letters before they reconcile? Argh!! If R--we have seven chaps. ;)
     
  16. Valiowk

    Valiowk Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 23, 2000
    Ouch, those were harsh words handed out by both Luke and Mara! :( Loved your analysis of Luke's dependence on the Force in this chapter, and the way Mara tried, albeit unsuccessfully, to point it out. They still have some way to go... ;)

    BTW, you forgot to add me to the PM list. ;)
     
  17. Jedi-2B

    Jedi-2B Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    Mara was being brutally honest with him, and he wasn't receptive to hearing it. Maybe Luke needs to go get that drink from Bruno now. Perhaps getting some of the same advice from an outsider would sink in more.

    Great emotional chapter!
     
  18. Blue_Milkshake

    Blue_Milkshake Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 18, 2005
    =D= Wow--wonderful post here!!!

    ?I won?t make the mistakes he did. I won?t yield to the dark side. Never, Mara.? Luke?s irritation was obvious now.
    ?You say that, but you don?t know--? she started.
    ?Yes, I do. There?s nothing more to say on this topic. My stand on this has been very clear.?


    No, Luke, you really don't know.

    These things needed to be said. The saying of them was like ripping off a bandage, but now that they've been said Luke will think about it all. I just hope that he and Mara can work things out once Luke has processed everything.
     
  19. JadeLotus

    JadeLotus Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 27, 2005
    Love a good bare-bones Luke/Mara discussion =D= Wonderfully done! Now if only they can find a common ground and listen to one another...
     
  20. Jedi Trace

    Jedi Trace SouthEast RSA star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Dec 15, 1999
    Awesome job with this chapter! =D= =D==D= Lot of intricate emotions and tensions going on and the dialogue remains completely realistic and plausible throughout.

    They both have a lot to learn about each other and being in a relationship, it seems. Good thing they've got friends who might be able to offer some insight. @};-

    (And I really like the changes you made! ;))

    Looking forward to a make-up scene at some point. I hope. [face_batting]





     
  21. dyslecksec

    dyslecksec Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Jun 28, 2007
    Ah, pride and arrogance. It's extremely interesting if you look throughout Star Wars "history" how much damage those two attributes cause. The Order's pride and arrogance in itself and its members in themselves allowed them to be blindsided by Palpatine; pride and arrogance were the primary factors in Revan's, Anakin Skywalker's, and Jacen Solo's falls to darkness; arrogance also blinded Palpatine, leading to his defeat.

    Even if Mara's opinion of Luke's Force use was wrong, his attitude alone shows him unknowingly mimicing his father and treading far closer to the dark side than he thinks.

    The chapter was brilliant. Although, I think there was one point Mara could've made that might have penetrated Skywalker's mind. She could've pointed out that when he was using the Force as his first solution to his problems, he was taking the quick and easy path...
     
  22. Klimt_Of_Tornesdal

    Klimt_Of_Tornesdal Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Dec 8, 1999
    I can't help but be reminded of what Obi Wan said to Anakin before they dueled on Mustafar:
    Only a Sith deals in absolutes.
     
  23. Jedi_Scribe

    Jedi_Scribe Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jun 22, 2007
    I think you are doing a marvelous job with this fic. The sections containing the challenge words were particularly auspicious and you weaved them into the story brilliantly.

    It's hard (for me) to imagine a Luke & Mara courtship taking place under such relatively benign conditions, and yet the familiarity of the situation makes the story so easy to relate to. The dialog is felicitous to their characters, and the way you handled the "fight" at the end was very convincing.

    Whatever happens now, I hope Luke finally learns from his mistakes. Right now he barely deserves to call himself a Master, let alone pursue a relationship with Mara.
     
  24. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    An Alliance at Alida?s Part 11 replies:

    Jade_Pilot: I can't help but think that Mara can dish it out, but not take it. Although Luke had stopped listening as well.

    Thank you very much! You?re right in your assessment. They have valid points to make in order to make their relationship work, but they don?t know the angle they have to use to approach the conversation.[face_thinking]



    Walker_of_minds: I look forward to reading more and how the two work it out. Luke being stubborn I think ah when emtions are high it is hard to see.

    Thanks! Yes, sometimes it?s hard to hear the words when you are emotionally stressed. [face_worried]


    Ginchy: Oh, dear. It has to be said, but it's hard for Luke to hear. He's not quite ready to hear it yet. He and Mara can sure wound one another when they want to.

    That?s very true. They each know the other?s weak areas. But that?s the risk you take when you share everything in your heart.[face_love]

    Terrific update in showing that it's not all smooth sailing yet...

    Not quite yet! But once the hard part is overcome, then they will be closer than ever. [:D] Thank you for your support!



    Jade_eyes: I can't decide if it was right for Mara to call Luke on his not listening right off--I'm glad she did, but that probably didn't make him open up on the inside, though it appeared on the outside that he was.

    Mara wants things to be clear, but she sure took the wrong approach to get her message across![face_shame_on_you]

    I agreed 200 percent with every single thing she said. Once you start doing all the wrong things for the right reasons, it's not too far of a baby step to doing the wrong things and not caring what the reasons are.

    She has seen it firsthand. Unfortunately, Luke is too upset to really hear what she is saying.[face_not_talking]

    Emotional doors have been slammed and I don't know what can open them up again. Both are cussed stubborn.

    But both of them feel something for the other. Which will be stronger, love or pride? [face_love] Thank you so much!


    RedGold: Not quite square one, but they have to reassess what their relationship means. Thank you for your kind reply!:)


    Valiowk: Ouch, those were harsh words handed out by both Luke and Mara!

    They care deeply about their beliefs, and they feel attacked when someone tries to point out a weakness.[face_shame_on_you]

    Loved your analysis of Luke's dependence on the Force in this chapter, and the way Mara tried, albeit unsuccessfully, to point it out. They still have some way to go...

    Yes, there is still a way to go. They have learned to trust ? can they learn to forgive? [face_love] Thank you very much for your reply!


    Jedi-2B: Mara was being brutally honest with him, and he wasn't receptive to hearing it. Maybe Luke needs to go get that drink from Bruno now.

    Thank you! I?m happy you liked this. Mara is not one for subtleties, and Luke feels threatened by her words. Now they have to rebuild.:rolleyes:



    Blue_Milkshake: These things needed to be said. The saying of them was like ripping off a bandage, but now that they've been said Luke will think about it all. I just hope that he and Mara can work things out once Luke has processed everything.

    They will have to move to a new stage in their relationship, one where they can forgive the other for making mistakes. But they have a lot of love already built between them. Thank you for your thoughtful reply![face_love]


    JadeLotus: Now if only they can find a common ground and listen to one another...

    Love needs to find a way, doesn?t it?;) Thanks!




    Jedi_Trace: Lot of intricate emotions and tensions going on and the dialogue remains completely realistic and plausible throughout. They both have a lot to learn about each other and being in a relationship, it
     
  25. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    divapilot posted: But both of them feel something for the other. Which will be stronger, love or pride?


    Hums a Sade song: Love is stronger than pride, & this is no ordinary love. :) This is a fact. [face_laugh] :*
     
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