Anakin's Anger Management Courses: A Study in Writing Humor - A New Silly Game 7/7!!!

I'll take #17, please.

 

Workshop #1

The scene TPM - Because Obi was not quick enough and couldn't get through the laser fields in time, his master was impaled by Darth Maul's lightsaber.

Comments by Brentus This was so nice, I had to do it twice...


Title Be Careful What You Wish For...



Obi-Wan couldn't believe his eyes. There, before him as he was trapped by pulsing repulser fields was the moment he'd prayed would never happen, playing out right before his terrified form. His Master, his friend, was about to die!

Brazenly, he called on the Force. He prayed for something, anything that could stop the heinous crime from taking place.

Sometimes, the Force has a sense of humor...

Space and time warped within the chamber, causing all concerned parties, including the Sith, to stop and take notice. A bubble formed and space seemed to break apart. A form stumbled through the rip. He was dressed in a Jedi robe, but it seemed an archaic design and made out of a material that wasn't synthesized.

This Jedi, if that's what he was, seemed just as perplexed as Obi-Wan. He looked around the room until he spotted the Sith, then his eyes bulged from his head.

Reaching for his lightsaber, the new arrival accidentally knocked his comm unit from his belt. He didn't seem to notice, however, because his saber was stuck to his belt! Tugging futilely at it, he didn't seem to notice the Sith who was approaching rapidly, his double-blade drawn.

Qui-Gon charged and once more locked blades with the Sith, while the new arrival tugged at his own weapon. Obi wondered just what was delaying the repulser field from opening.

"Who are you?" Obi shouted. "Help fight the Sith!"

"The name's Biggles!" the new arrival shouted in reply. "And Sith are my speciality!"

"Why does hearing that make me regret asking in the first place?" Obi groaned.

Qui-Gon was battling fiercely, but it something just on the edge of the Force told Obi that his Master's time was about up. Finally, though, salvation seemed to draw near. Biggles finally managed to separate his saber from his belt. The only trouble was... now his belt fell off and his pants quickly dropped around his ankles.

Biggles lunged forward, only to tear his pants, causing his foot to slip, kicking his comm. The comm sailed lazily through the air, just as the Sith used the Force to disorient Qui-Gon momentarily. The comm bounced off one wall, soaring right into the back of the Sith's head.

Biggles, now in full stumble mode due to his pants chaffing his ankles, whizzed by both Sith and Jedi on his way to the far wall.

The Sith, distracted by the bump on the head, growled at Biggles and took a swipe as the silly Knight went by. The blade slash managed to singe Biggles' robe and send him further off balance, right toward Qui-Gon.

Managing to dodge the crazt scene, Qui-Gon readied his blade as the Sith charged, enraged. Qui-Gon skewered the Sith as Biggles bumbled past. Biggles' belt, however, had finally broken loose from the pants and with a whip as it slipped out of the last loop of Biggles' trousers, it wrapped itself around one of Qui-Gon's legs.

The comm unit that was still making its appointed rounds, bouncing from corner to corner, finally struck back, landing on the floor just a meter away from Biggles. Obi-Wan groaned as Biggles bounced hard off the wall and set his foot down on the comm. Biggles, comm and all, slid haphazardly at great speed toward the triumphant Jedi Master.

Before Obi could even open his mouth to warn him, Biggles had slammed into Qui-Gon's back. The venerable Master, fell forward, impaling himself on the Sith's blade.

Obi-Wan screamed and Biggles whirled, only to fall down the shaft in the middle of the room.

 

Very funny except for the ending. I do like slapstick comedy and I could picture it very clearly. Killing Qui-Gon again.... tsk, tsk. LOL.

Is Biggles your OC or someone in films/tv/books?

 

Here is my entry for the Humor Workshop #1
This was my topic to work with:


Revenge of the Sith: Anakin has a dream that Padme is going to die in childbirth. When he sits there brooding, she wants to know what is wrong...

So, my imagination started working overtime! And I came up with... this. I hope you like it!

"Later"

Anakin Skywalker sat in the moonlight. The fountain in the corner was playing peacefully. The clock ticked in rhythm. To anyone looking at the picture, it would have seemed one of serenity; at least? on the outside.

However, on the inside, Anakin was a jumble of feelings. Sorrow, unending sorrow burdened him, and anger because he could not stop what was coming. His wife was going to die in childbirth?it was as simple as that. His dreams had foretold her fate, and his dreams were never wrong.

He was the Chosen One, and he was reduced to this? He was supposed to be the most powerful Jedi ever, and yet, he couldn?t stop the future? No, he vowed, he would have to try.

?Anakin,? Padmé said, startling her husband. ?What?s wrong??

?Nothing,? He turned away. How could he bear to tell his wife that he had foreseen her death?

?Don?t shut me out.? Padmé insisted, laying an arm on Anakin shoulder. ?Was it?? she bit her lip to keep from laughing. She couldn?t laugh; she knew how serious her husband took things. ?Honey, did you lose your stuffed Jawa?,?

?Padmé,? Anakin said, his face reddening. ?I told you, I stopped sleeping with that thing when the war started.?

Padmé smirked but didn?t say anything.

?It was a dream.? Her husband said at last. A nightmare,

?What kind of dream.?

Anakin bit his lip. ?I dreamt? I dreamt?? Oh how could he tell her? ?I dreamt I?turned into a gnome!? He blurted.

Padmé looked, puzzled. ?A gnome???

?Yes,? he said, puzzled. Where had that idea come from? ?A little man with a white beard and a pointy hat,? he forced a shudder. ?Oh Padmé, it was awful!?

The senator looked down at her husband, unsure of what to think. ?A?gnome??

?Yes Padmé, and? and? you were a gnome too! We were the gnomeiest couple in the galaxy, and I was still a Jedi, and we were part of a freak show!? Anakin tried not to laugh. What was he saying? What would his wife think?

?Anakin.? Padmé said, trying desperately to hold back the giggles threatening to escape. She coughed instead. ?Honey, well, we aren?t gnomes so? it?s alright.? She patted his back comfortingly. ?Can we go back to bed now??

Anakin rose and stretched, engulfing his wife in a hug. ?Yes, yes of course. I guess that?s what I get for? for? reading that story before bed.?

?What story?? Padmé asked suspiciously.

?The story of?? Anakin?s mind started working overtime. ?The story of the Great Gnome Vampire!?

Padmé stepped back, and just stared at him. Here was her husband, the chosen Jedi, and he was having nightmares about becoming a gnome? She knew his dreams always came true, but this? this was ridiculous! He couldn?t possibly think something like that could actually happen.

?Can we please just go to bed?? She almost begged, leading her husband back towards the bedroom.

?Yes, yes of course.? Anakin bit back his laughter. Who knew what Padmé though of him now? He lifted his wife high into the air and twirled her around, making her give a little scream.

?Anakin!?

?What??

She shook her head. ?Never mind,?

And her husband had to agree. Never mind his dreams. He would not let that spoil a beautiful evening. He would have to tell her?later.

 

Oh allright. I take #27 if that's still open. I need an intellectual break from translating. It makes my brain melt ...

 

Biggles is actually a character from Monty Python I knew I'd heard that name before

Great one! Monty Python crossovers are always cool by me!

 

Humor Workshop #1
Setting: Attack of the Clones: Poor Boba Fett watches his dad be killed ...

Comment: You, LaughingSock, are evil!

Title: Afterlife is overrated ...

He saw the helmet fall one way ... and his father's body the other. He saw Windu rise from a crouch, giving the beheaded corpse a last disdainful glare. He could see it in great detail, was sure it had burned itself into his memory. He knew it was real ... and yet he couldn't believe it.

He wanted to scream but his throat was closed as if he'd swallowed a full uj cake at once.

Dad!

"I'm here, son," he heard a disembodied voice say. It was his father's voice, as soothing and yet as menacing as ever.

I miss him, Boba thought and shook his head. All I want to do is to wake up from this dream.

"Will you stop feeling sorry for yourself?" the voice said again but this time there was annoyance creeping into it. "I haven't raised you to be some whiny brat. Get a grip on yourself, son."

Boba's anger flared and he punched the canyon wall in frustration. Why did such things have to happen to him? Why didn't Windu die? He had no family, noone would have missed him as much as ... He was torn from his inner tantrum when pain shot through his ear. At first he thought a stray blaster bolt had grazed him but when he touched the earlobe he felt no blood.

"I said stop the whining, son. I'm not going to repeat myself. Is that clear?"

"Yes, Sir," Boba mumbled. He shook his head again. I'm losing it, he thought, annoyed at himself. He was ten, old enough to experience the battlefield according to Mando standards.

Suddenly he realized something floating in front of him. No, not something ? someone! He saw a small humanoid shape float in front of his face, maybe ten or fifteen centimeters high. And it wore his father's beskar'gam.

"No, you're not seeing things, son. It's me. Or better what they made of me," the tiny being grumbled.

Boba's eyes widened. "Dad?" he asked shakily.

"Yes, it's me. So let's cut a few parsec off the discussion, shall we?"

Boba couldn't believe it. "How ... ? Why ... ?"

"Remember the lectures about survival? My ten basic rules?"

Boba nodded. "Yes, Sir."

"Well," the tiny man said and crossed his arms, "we have to add one additional rule and place it right at the top. It's 'Whatever you do don't get killed.' The afterlife is so overrated!"

Boba frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Remember the osik Skirata told you about the afterlife? How beautiful it is? All osik, all of it. First they're harping on about your life and the deeds you did and then they give you these awful jobs. I had to pull my blaster to be assigned your guardian angel. And even then they refused to give me wings ... 'You have a rocketpack,' they said. And you know what's worse?"

Boba shook his head. "No, Sir."

"I've got to pay the rocketfuel, too. 'There's no budget for that,' they said. Remember Boba ? the afterlife is overrated!"

 

-If you are a writer, what genre of fanfiction do you usually write?

I like mush, though I don't write it that much. I'm not sure what genre most of my fic comes under so it's hard to say.

-Have you ever written humorous fanfiction? If yes, please tell us about your experience (whether you enjoy writing it, how your readers responded, whether it came naturally or difficultly, etc.). If no, please tell us why you are now interested in writing it and why you haven?t done so before.

I have, my Force Ghost of Jar Jar series. I found it fairly easy as Jar Jar is a naturally goofy character, making a goofy character do goofy things isn't hard. I haven't tried to write any other humour though.

-Do you enjoy reading humorous fanfiction? For those of you who read humor, who are your favorite authors? If you do not enjoy reading humor, why is it so?

It depends on my mood. Sometimes I like a bit of humour but there are times when I don't. I don't really have any favourite authors.

-What would you like to see from this thread?

Help and tips with writing good humour.


Can I have #24 please?

 

Humor Workshop #1

Title: Anakin's Favorite.
(inspired by a certain convo in the social thread )

Scene: RotS; When Padme tells Anakin she is pregnant.

Not my best foot forward, but I'm more of a banter guy, and this didn't call for banter.



He calmly excused himself from the Senator from Alderman, sensing a presence waiting in the darkness around him. Anakin rushed into the shadows to find his love, not an assassin as he had hoped.

?It?s you!? he cried with a mixture of joy and disappointment, ?What are you doing, skulking around behind old columns like that? What if I had cut you up??

?Oh Anakin, thank goodness you?re back!? Padme cried as she wrapped her arms around his muscular frame.

Anakin stood stoic, with his hands by his sides, continuing his rant, ?How do you think I would feel if I had loped your arm off? We?d be quite the pair with robotic arms.?

?There were whispers?? she tried to soothe his worries with her own.

?Oh sure, Senator and Jedi, we already have government issued plating for our speeders, but now we?re trying to cheat the system, gain an extra spot closer with handicapped plates.?

Anakin looked down into her eyes and sighed, ?Do know what kind of lecture I?d have to suffer through from Obi Wan??

Padme looked into his dense expression, a hint of sadness in her eyes, yet something more.

?Of course, all the other Jedi and clones in the Outer Rim sieges are jealous of me because I?m the one they pulled to rescue the chancellor?? he stops his rambling to bend down for a kiss, but she steps back.

?No not here??

?Oh?that. Obi Wan had been knocked unconscious by Count Dooku, it?s the onions from his sandwich you smell, I had to give him mouth-to-mouth, even though I know how much you hate onion breath, I figured in this instance you wouldn't...wait, and you?re trembling. Oh.?

Dawn broke on marble head when he suddenly realized he was hugging Padme with an ignited lightsaber in hand. ?Sorry. I sense more, what is it my love??

Padme could not hold the tears back any longer, ?Anakin, I have won....?

?You won the Coruscant Lotto? Now we can move to your villa on Naboo! Retirement, here I come!?

Frustration moved into her tone, ?No. Anakin...," she tried to remain firm, but couldn't.

"I?m pregnant.? She sobbed.

With her head cupped in both hands he took a step back, ?You?re what??

?I?I?m preg?pregnant.? She repeated.

?I thought you had been busy doing Senate stuff while I was away,? he questioned, before a look of anger seeped into his face.

?Or was it just a certain senator?? he questioned before dashing away after Senator Organa, waving his drawn lightsaber about.

?Get back here Bail! I want to talk to you!?

Padme just shook her head in frustration, surprised how easily she had been taken in by that idiot.

 

Everyone's entries are great- I'll be back with more specific feedback later, but here's my humble submission.

Workshop #1

The scene: Anakin isn't the Jedi he should be.

Title: "Brooding Again"

---

"Obi-Wan was here." Anakin stated it as fact, since he could practically smell his old Master's presence all over the room. The only problem was, he couldn't fetch a cleaning 'droid to rid the room of a presence. Imagine the call. [i]Hello, I have residual presence in my apartment, and I'd like it cleaned out. If you could come 'round within the hour, that would be lovely. [/i]

"Of course he was," Padme replied, smiling. "He's worried about you."

"Me?" Anakin raised a skeptical eyebrow. "What, does he think I'm going to fly off the handle again?"

"No," Padme looked at him reprovingly. "He thinks you're under a lot of stress."

"Stress?"

"Yes, stress. That thing that happens when the galaxy is at war, and everyone slaps a big impressive label on you, dear Hero Without Fear."

"War?" Anakin's eyes went wide. "You mean... there's a [i]war[/i] on?"

Padme smiled. "I know you tend to overlook these things."

"Where would I be without you?"

"You'd still have Threepio."

Anakin shuddered. "Point taken."

"Anyway, he's worried. So is the rest of the Council."

"No they're not," Anakin said flatly. "They're a bunch of stodgy old men who feel the need to babysit the Chancellor's pet project."

Padme looked at him reprovingly. "Now, you know that's not true."

"Isn't it?" Anakin began to pace. "What if they're right? I'm not the Jedi I should be."

Exasperated, Padme pointed to the prominent bulge that was her stomach. "Anakin, I think you abandoned being the Jedi you're supposed to be around the time we got married. Or did they waive the 'no attachments' clause while I wasn't looking?"

In spite of himself, Anakin grinned. "Not the last time I checked."

"Well, then what's your worry?"

Anakin opened his mouth to tell her of all the desires he'd had lately, but they seemed to have vanished. Because surely as he'd abandoned the road of a traditional Jedi the day he'd married her, he'd also gained the only thing in the galaxy he'd ever need. And, true to form, he was the last person to catch on to that particular fact. "Worry? Me?" He pulled his wife into a warm embrace. "I don't worry about things."

"You run out and fix them," Padme nodded. "Occasionally resulting in broken limbs, scared animals, and fried circuitry."

"Hey, those logic boards were not my fault. R2 was supposed to change the voltage levels."

"That's right, blame it on the 'droid." Padme grinned up at him.

"R2 can take it. He's tough."

Padme simply laughed. "Well, then let's have no more of this brooding."

"I don't brood."

"You just keep thinking that, sweetie."

 

please give me 11

 

Index is updated. AF will have to give you 11, earlybird-obi-wan, because I don't have the list. Didn't want you to think you'd been forgotten.

-TMJ

 

-thor- Loved that Jango was bopping the kid while floating up there in miniature. Loved the rule about not getting killed. Very cute!

ale - Loved that Anakin came to the wrong conclusion and thought it was Bail. Oh, boy. When he tries to fight with Bail, everything is going to come out. Good job.

DWH - "You just keep thinking that, sweetie." Loved that line. Very funny. And I thought Padme reminding him that he wasn't the Jedi he should be was right on. Well done.

 

I shall answer the questions you posted later, but 'til then, may I have number 6, please?

 

The Biggles character from Monty Python was a parody of a long-running book character created by Captain W.E. Johns. In the first few books, written in the 1930s, Biggles (James Bigglesworth) was a teenage pilot in WWI and a charter pilot after the war. When WWII came along, he and his pals started flying for king and country again. After that, they formed the Special Air Police for Scotland Yard. [Most of the books I've read come from this last period.] Johns wrote almost a hundred books for the character, the last few published posthumously.

There was also a movie in the '80s, which grafted on a time travel story and featured Peter Cushing's final film performance.



EDIT: Yes, I've done Biggles fanfic. Just a crossover drabble with Doctor Who, but it still counts.

 

This sounds fun, give me number 18. I'll answer the questions tomorrow.

 

Good on ya, Drabba. I was going to mention that myself, but you beat me to it. Plus, I didn't know as much about the character as you do. Personally, I like to think of my character as being different from both a WWI flying ace and the Python silliness (as much as I love Python, they never had Biggles being a clumsy Inspector Clouseau-like person), so I like to think of it as just borrowing the name.


LOL! I love these entries! And diane, loved yours too, forgot to posst that before, with the remote control, lol, beautiful, though personally I rewind and play over and over those parts in AotC when Padme is dressed in that tight fitting white catsuit but that's just me. Rwoar.

 

Wow... ale I'd totally forgotten that I'd given you that one When it clicked and I saw it... I nearly choked on my drink.

I must admit I've never had a fanfic named after me

In order to show my appreciation... *plops down e-child to run loose through the Boards* Now, that's a disturbing thought, one that will probably make that never be mentioned again

 

Workshop #1

AotC: Shmi?s Funeral

Author?s Notes: I'm a little uncertain about this. Not really my usual area of humor (like one fic makes an "area of expertise"), which tends to be Obi/Ani interplay.

Senseless Grief

The small crowd stood before the headstones overlooking the vast, empty desert. Cliegg Lars stifled a sob as he stared down from his hoverchair at the freshly turned sand that now covered his beloved wife, Shmi. Owen and Beru stood next to him, very close together, and beyond them stood Padmé and Anakin. Padmé felt uncomfortable; after the scene in the garage, she couldn?t help but wonder what Anakin might do with this even more real demonstration that his mother was, in fact dead.

The wind blew over the sand as Cliegg said a few words over her grave. She was touched by the tough man?s gentle words and his truly sorrowful look. Despite never having met Shmi, she was glad that, after having lost her son, the former slave had found such love and acceptance.

Anakin, however, seemed ever resentful, even of the consolation his mother had found not in him, but in these people. A tear rolling down his cheek, the Jedi moved in front of the gravestone before flinging himself to his knees. ?I wasn?t strong enough, Mom,? he choked out, his words barely comprehensible. ?I wanted to save you, but I wasn?t strong enough!? With his hand, he knocked some of the sand towards the grave. ?I?m the Chosen One, but I just couldn?t do it!?

Padmé wanted to take a step backward and roll her eyes. Always with this Chosen One stuff, she couldn?t help thinking. You?d think the Jedi would curb this kind of ego-stroking?

?From the moment I left you, I?ve thought of you every day,? Anakin continued.

Padmé sighed. You, me, and everyone else, apparently. Did Anakin say the same things to everyone?

?And now that I have found you again ? it is agony. Your death ? it is tormenting me.?

There go the contractions. Better settle in for a while. She saw Beru and Owen exchange uneasy looks.

?I know I should be happy that you are in a better place. You are one with the Force ? but that would be rational, and that is something I cannot do!? Anakin broke off, a cry coming from somewhere deep in his throat. ?I wish I could wish my feelings away.?

Rolling her eyes, Padmé shifted her weight. ?There is no emotion.? What a bunch of bantha poodoo. The suns were hot on her back, and her feet were starting to hurt. Unfortunately, she didn?t think Anakin would be winding down any time soon.

?I miss you so much, Mom??

You haven?t even seen her for ten years, since you left for the Jedi Temple!

Crying in earnest, Anakin threw himself prostrate on the hot sand. Padmé flinched at the thought of the hot grains digging into his skin. Then he grabbed a handful.

?Sand,? he murmured. ?So coarse and rough and irritating. Not like your??

?That?s it, I can?t take any more,? Padmé grumbled. ?I?ll be in the ship when you?re done,? she informed Anakin. Beru and Owen, looking greatly relieved, fled as she distracted Anakin momentarily from his eulogy. Cliegg was not far behind. The Senator didn?t even look back as she stalked to her ship.

Anakin remained on the ground, sand stuck to his wet cheeks and hands, half-curled and gazing at the headstone. ?It is all Obi-Wan?s fault.?

 

"It is all Obi-Wan's fault."

LOL! Great punchline, TMJ. Good viggie!

 

Brentus - wow, you did two. I missed the other one. Loved the boots idea. It might just actually work. Great job with it.

Musical - That was sick but really funny. I loved that Anakin kept repeating lines. Padme would never marry him after that funeral! Very cute!

 

Wow, it has been forever since I have been on these boards, I totally missed them!! So can I have #24 if it is still available? Thanks!

And I thought I would answer this....



If you are a writer, what genre of fanfiction do you usually write?
I write humor and smut, sometimes together, and I love angst I have to admit.


Have you ever written humorous fanfiction? If yes, please tell us about your experience.

I have and oddly enough, the name of the first humorous non NC 17 fan fic I wrote was with PadwanKayla here on these boards titled Anger Management Darth Vader, a series of letters. I had so fun with her on those, I miss them! It was one of my fave things I have ever written. My other stab at humor was with a sex ed class with Obi-Wan as the teacher and Anakin one of the students, that is about all I can say about that, haha.

Do you enjoy reading humorous fanfiction? For those of you who read humor, who are your favorite authors? If you do not enjoy reading humor, why is it so?

I absolutely love reading humorous fanfiction. I don't have a particular favorite author, I just read what I think is funny.

What would you like to see from this thread?

I would love to get some inspiration from this thread, quite honestly!

 

-thor: Thread-mistress?s privilege! Poor Boba? no wonder he grew up to be infamous!

moosemousse, Ack! I?ve got you on 24! I need to stay organized! I?ve got yours to you!

DWH, yours was well named! *giggled* Poor brooding Anakin!

AnakinGirl05, I put you on a different number because that one was already taken (I was just disorganized and forgot to put the original requestee there!)

All of you guys are doing great jobs with these! It's amusing how peopel can take these really hard scenes and make us all laugh! Remember, you can post these in The Saga if you so choose!

LaughingSock

 

Workshop 1

The scene The Empire Strikes Back: Hmm... how about the Hoth battle

Comments by Earlybird-Obi-Wan: Some songs inspired me and a commercial about a purple crocodile and the holiday-season with snow.

Purple rain? Hot(h) Purple snow (Humor thread first workshop)


Hoth
In the snow-trenches the rebels were waiting.
Luke Skywalker was boarding his snowspeeder.

Somewhere in the Force
Mace Windu was holding his ignited purple lightsaber aloft and said ?army of the dead, follow me, we have some rebels to safe.?

Kit Fisto asked ?where are they??

Mace answered ?on Hot(h)?

Qui-Gon snickered ?snowball fight.?

Mace Windu said ?come let?s go? and an army of 10,000 blue ghosts followed him.

Obi-Wan followed them with a big grin on his face. ?This is gonna be fun, Master Qui-Gon?

?Whitewashing you again, that?s fun my padawan.? Qui-Gon replied.

Obi-Wan said ?I have a bad feeling about this.?


Hoth ATAT

General Veers said ?rebels here we come yeah yeah yeah, We are living in a purple At At At, sitting in a walking At At At.?

A stormtrooper said ?it is grey and we are in an ATAT?

General Veers said ?I said that at at.? He started to hum ?we are living in a purple At At At.?

The stormtrooper sighed and saw the camera veering towards Veers. He said ?Dart Brother is watching you.?

General Veers said ?never mind? and he was singing again.


Hoth plains

Twelve snowspeeders were flying towards four AtAt?s.

Luke saw something incredible and said ?Ben, I see Ben, return to base immediately and board your transports.?

Wedge asked ?why??

Luke said ?the Jedi, they are fighting the imperials. Look Mace is mad at Vader.?

Wedge said ?yippee the Mace Menace is taking his revenge? and he saw a gigantic snowfigure floating towards the four AtAt?s.


Hoth AtAt

General Veers was singing ?let it snow, let it snow, let it snow?

The stormtrooper sang ?and the AtAt is jingling: missiles away, missiles away.?

Veers looked outside and said ?oh nooh, they have found the purple crocodile.?

Darth Vader spoke through the comlink ?General Veers what did you find??

Veers said ?a purple crocodile.?

Darth Vader said ?on an iceplanet??


Hoth Air

10,000 Jedi minus two were using the Force to float the purple snow crocodile towards the four AtAt?s

Two Jedi were having fun. Obi-Wan was peppering his master with snowballs and Qui-Gon was trying to whitewash him.?


Hoth AtAt

Veers sang as the figure was disintegrating in the air above the four speeders ?purple rain, purple rain, all we got is purple rain.?

Darth Vader said ?ridiculous? as he saw the four AtAt?s being engulfed in purple rain and breaking through the ice-lake.

---

And Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon?
They finished their snowball fight and returned with the 10,000 minus 2 to the Force.

And the rebels?
They escaped in their transports.


Fun.

Fin.

 

First let me say I am catching up and reading all of the responses and they are so funny! Everyone is doing such a great job!!!!


Workshop #1


Scene Revenge of the Sith: During the duel with Mace Windu, Palpatine undergoes a transformation as the Sith Lightning is deflected back at him....

author's comments I love that I got this one. And I did things a little different, what you are getting is Palpatine's thought process as this is happening to him. Fans of Robot Chicken note that I stole Panda Bear from them, haha. And for some reason his inner voice totally comes to me in the voice of Alec Baldwin...Go figure.

Oh, and it is totally crack-like fic, can't help myself.


Title A Glimpse Inside the Emperor's Head


You know, what I should really do is deflect some of that totally kick butt blue lightning stuff at this guy, I mean come on, that is definitely my best chance here. That stuff is great. Alright here you go mister bald headed, purple lightsaber wielding Jedi. I mean come on, who carries a purple lightsaber? WAIT! What in the name of Sith is happening here? It is coming back to me...CRAP! How did I get myself in this situation? I can't believe this guy is using that awful purple glow stick to deflect this back at me...

Wow, this stuff stings. I guess it really is a good thing to have in my arsenal.

Oh goodie, here comes Anakin. That kid, he'll help me. Did I just say goodie? Might as well have said yippee, this stuff really is already frying my brain. Anyway, yeah, that is my ticket out of this mess. Look at him, just standing there, looking at us. What is that look supposed to be? Is that brooding? He is entirely too pretty to brood, we are going to have to do something about that when he takes his place at my side. I mean I am going to be all ugly and what not, who knows what this lightning stuff is going to do to my complexion. I wonder if this is what a facial peel feels like?

Alright, this is beyond stinging now.....Like thousands of red ants biting every inch of my body....Must think of something to sway Anakin....Wait, yeah, that's it...Who cares if I really can't help him save that girl, what the heck is her name anyway? Panda Bear or something....Yeah, yeah that's it, he believes anything I say anyway.....Look at his face...He is considering.....Oh my word, I can hardly get my lips to move, I think I might need some chapstick.

Come on boy, this isn't fun anymore!! Turn to the Dark Side already! Do you see this blue stuff being deflected at my head?? I hope someday you feel what it is like, you overrated, overblown, wishy washy, whiny Jedi!!! Argh!!! Wow, that last one really hurt. If I get out of this mess I am converting to solar energy, I tell you. No more electricity for me!

Oh man, I can see my reflection in the dude's head, all bald and shiny. I don't look so good, oh man, I look like, like...Those creepy things in that movie Cocoon or something, or the withering spirits in The Little Mermaid, oh man this is bad....

Wait, ok, Anakin is talking, I can't really hear him, that stuff really did a number on me....The talking is getting louder, ok, this is good...He's taking out his lightsaber, and....He cut of Mace's hand? Hey, whatever works, right? Here's my chance....