BEER!!!!!!!!!!

You have to use a saw!

 

Well, providing everyone's hard a good time, they're usually slippy enough to just slide off....or so I've heard... *Looks around for timely diversion*

 

Oh yeah the saw... What about the cheese grater?

 

I don't like piercings either, but I had the top of my ear done years ago. But I didn't like it so I took it out

 

LOL

//waiting for the guys to run off screaming

The dreaded cheese grater.

 

You sick sick puppy! This country....

 

LOL! Make sure it's rusty.

 

That works.

 

If you give it enough time, Poppy, they'll pop off in their own good time! However, I don't like em meself, as I said... barely fit and it feels like you've.... okay, I'm leaving it there.. it's just damn uncomfortable!!

 

Ah DP... that sort of ring

So we've gone from beer to intimate piercings... well that might happen on a Friday night now in the pub

 

Yes, first the cheese grater and then lemon juice.

 

(siting here with thoughts of cheese graters, grating, oh, grating into tender flesh, oh, I can't stop the thoughts from coming.)

 

ARGH!!!! The CHEESE GRATER!!! I have nightmares ever since MoT and Minxie told me about that..... *shudder*

 

Poods - do you realise you're meant to put 'em in warm water to make 'em stretchy first right?!

*Mental picture of Poods tearing off skin as he forces the bad boy on*

Chees graters can also be applied to sensitive areas on a young lady as well...the only difference is that in Izzi's case, the grater would come off worse....

ED: I didn't hear that story either...and I don't really wanna...

 

Ok wait...I don't think I heard that story.

Tom!

 

So Soggy, your daughter's well trained in the mysterious arts then I take it?

 

Ouch, gittester...

And how does metal stretch? ?
As for the Swedish one... that must be where I was going wrong!

 

<covering ears> I do not want to know anymore gittes.

 

Gittes, if you have problems in that department remember that carrots are a good remedy.




They are only quite difficult to attach.

 

First you have to heat it up with a blow torch.

 

There was once this film of dubious nature I saw involving a fictitious cookery show and one girl showing another how to 'give a bird a good stuffing' using a carrot...

 

Poods - sorry, I thought you was talking about the little pink rubbery clit stim ones; the ones with different little bumps, ribs etc over 'em....obviously metal won't stretch in warm water - and if you were to get metal hot enough to stretch, that'd be the last place you'd put it!

ED: Poods, I want to see that show...for research purposes natch....

 

Poodu, you are bad, bad, bad! Now my monitor's all covered with coffee.

 

And I just can't breath because I'm laughing so hard.

 

Which is why I never drink whilst reading this board now Soggy

So reading all of this, does it mean I've had a "boring" sex life having not used these kinds of things?