Saga Behind the Line - OT era, Rebel OC's, OC Challenge Entry

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Thumper09, Feb 10, 2007.

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  1. Thumper09

    Thumper09 Force Ghost star 4

    Dec 9, 2001
    Title: Behind the Line
    Author: Thumper09
    Timeframe: Approximately ten months after the Battle of Yavin
    Characters: All OCs, mostly Rebel fighter pilots
    Summary: Not every Rebel is a good guy.
    Notes: This story is my response to the February OC Challenge, which states, "'Everyone has a price.' Does the old saying hold true for your OC? Offer them a bribe to do something that they would otherwise find reprehensible, and let us all find out! And remember, often a person's 'price' has nothing to do with money..."
    Disclaimer: The universe ain't mine, but I think we all know that by now. All characters are mine but are a result of the universe.

    Constructive criticism is most welcome, either in the thread or in PM.


    To Lieutenant Shaun Pellicer, the time immediately following a battle was more difficult to get through than the battle itself. Dogfights were charged events full of adrenaline, instinct, reflex and subconscious reliance on one's training. Once they were over, the adrenaline drained away and the instincts were replaced with more conscious thought processes, assuming the pilot was still alive. It was an abrupt and drastic shift in the state of one's being, a difficulty few rookies anticipated or knew how to deal with properly. To top it all off, the end of a dogfight rarely meant the end of danger, so like everyone else who participated in a battle, fighter pilots were often expected to remain alert and at the top of their game even when dealing with the post-dogfight void and letdown.

    That was the state Pellicer found himself in as he guided his X-wing over the forested surface of the planet. Corona Squadron had been called in to provide air support for Rebel army units attempting to seize a small Imperial base. Things had gone better than they usually did on Rebel missions in Pellicer's experience, and after a relatively brief dogfight and a relatively brief surface battle, the victorious Rebels were out sweeping the land and the sky for any Imperial surprises. The Coronas' leader, Commander Quentell Mackin, had split them up by wingpairs for their patrols.

    So far the sensors on Pellicer's snubfighter had been quiet, and he hadn't heard any reports from his wingman, Flight Officer Chryse "CC" Cerac, that indicated she had found anything either. Dutifully the pair continued their assigned patrol route, and Pellicer was secretly glad for the training he had received prior to joining the Rebellion that helped him better cope with that post-dogfight emotional crash and force his alertness level to stay high.

    A short time later, he credited that training with allowing him to spot the flashing blip on his sensor console before his droid beeped to report it. "I already see it, Trip," Pellicer said to the astromech with just a hint of smug satisfaction. He glanced over the information and then turned his X-wing to head toward the blip's location. Keying his comm, he said, "Six, this is Five."

    He noted with approval that CC had already begun turning to stay with him. "You have something, Five?" she asked.

    "Affirmative. You should be able to pick it up in a second. Looks like a group of life signs on the ground. Might be one of our teams, but we need to check."

    "I'm getting the reading now," CC said, "and I'm seeing the same thing. They're not too far away."

    It only took a few moments for Pellicer's X-wing to reach the place were the life signs were supposed to be. They were in a small clearing in the forest, and he circled high above for a moment to get a first look at whatever was down there.

    He was able to make out some figures. A group of humanoids in green was standing in positions roughly scattered around another group of humanoids, this one in dark blue uniforms and standing huddled together. No one seemed to be moving much, especially the blue uniforms. A few seconds later, some blaster bolts flashed into being, and then the humanoids in dark blue uniforms were no longer standing.

    "What?!" In one heartb
  2. JadeSolo

    JadeSolo Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Sep 20, 2002
    The tension! You had me yelling "Don't do it!" at my screen. :p

    "Not every Rebel is a goody-goody hero, just like not every Imperial is a horrible monster," Pellicer said harshly. "A lot of Rebels are only here for revenge against the Imps.

    I loved the conflict between Pellicer's Imperial ambition and his own sense of morality, and the way it played out as he started dreaming of his own squadron. Nothing bursts a dream like realizing it was built on blood.

    Excellent vig, made even better by the "Due South" quote. Great show. :D
  3. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 5, 2004
    I loved the whole thing, but I must say that I thought the quote at the end was amazing! And was the perfect way to end this! =D=
  4. Rogue_Pilot_2347

    Rogue_Pilot_2347 Jedi Padawan star 4

    May 16, 2005
    That was awesome! i was shaking my head begging Pellicer not to do it. The quote at the end was the perfect way to end it. It brought the whole thing home to me with a resounding echo. Well done. =D= =D= =D=
  5. Darth Muis

    Darth Muis Jedi Padawan star 4

    Mar 11, 2000
    That was good! Interesting take on the challenge. The line about not every rebel being goody-goody hero sparked all sorts of images and story ideas in my mind.

    Good story with a very well written main character. I could really picture him!
  6. Luton_Plunder

    Luton_Plunder Jedi Knight star 3

    Jun 15, 2006
    Great Response, Thumper!

    I love your characters - Pellicer is great with his obviously strictly-imposed sense of discipline being tested here. You brought out the conflict inside him greatly. I loved the description, especially toward the end:

    Just a couple of examples of the prose that really made this story work. It came across as very real to me and that made the whole experience very effective. Great work, Thumper - I'll keep any eye out for more of your stuff :D
  7. jasonnels

    jasonnels Jedi Youngling

    Sep 21, 2006
    Oh my word, that was intense. Way to go! These entries are awesome. Great job! I loved the line about how everybody has a spot that hey refuse to cross.
  8. Thumper09

    Thumper09 Force Ghost star 4

    Dec 9, 2001
    Thanks for reading, everyone. :D

    JadeSolo - Yay, another DueSer! Due South was by far my favorite TV show ever. I'm just glad I remembered that quote and could fit it in here. :p And I agree, blood will burst a dream and keep it deflated for good. Thanks for your comments. :)

    VaderLVR - Thank you for the compliment! I had some fun digging through the episode on my DVD to find the quote and make sure it was right. I'm glad it worked in the story like I was hoping it would.

    Rogue_Pilot - Thanks! I'm happy that you enjoyed the story and that the quote helped bring things to a final conclusion. Much appreciated!

    Darth Muis - The relatively few numbers of non-heroic Rebels is something that's always surprised me :p (well, I know there are some out there in canon, but not many). Don't get me wrong, I love the Rebs to pieces. :) But they must have some really good basic training to get all these disgruntled people together and have them not go off looking for revenge on their own. ;) Thanks for reading!

    Luton_Plunder - This was definitely a you came up with, hee hee. I'm glad the story came across as real and that the internal conflict seemed to work. Thanks for the comments!

    jasonnels - Thanks for the reply! I'm happy that you liked the quote at the end too. South is full of little gold mines like that. :)

  9. BigE

    BigE Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jul 31, 2002
    Well, better late than never. I'm sure glad that I finally got around to reading this entry.

    That was awesome. :cool: I agree with the others: the tension was high, and the quote at the end was perfect.

    Offering a squadron, now that was smooth.
  10. Thumper09

    Thumper09 Force Ghost star 4

    Dec 9, 2001
    Thanks, BigE! I'm glad you enjoyed it. :)

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