Saga Braken Starblaster Destroys The Galaxy! (Han on Trial, humor, complete 5/2)

Hilaroius ending! I love Braken's newest case, Artoo Detoo...and his ever so compassionate response to: ?DO MY SERVOS NOT PUMP? IF YOU CUT ME, DO I NOT LEAK?? Artoo asked.

The lawyer questioning him considered this question. After a moment of thought, Braken said, ?I motion we try it, your honors.?

LOL! Great work!

 

In a striking precedent,? The Arbiter said, ?we have reached a 4-4-1 split vote.?

?Does that mean we win?? Braken asked.

?No!?

?Awwww??

It can't end.

But what a perfect way to do so.

 

amidalachica: Somehow I feel like a long string of head injuries would not be a boon to the Supreme Court?s abilities.

Daena: Eh, curiosity never killed anyone?

?Okay maybe you have a point.

KELIA: Artoo?s been through worse. Guy?s tough. Don?t make them like that any more.

Forcefire: True, though I was pretty happy with how about five things that seemed totally unrelated and unimportant came together to turn out to be the main point of the story. Something like a Nursery Crime book in that regard. Or so I like to think.

Nat: The justices were a lot of fun to write. They?ve got potential.

Thumper: Trixie just needs to ask herself What Would Braken Do? And then, uh, do something else.

Ale: Yeah? Sorry about that.

padawan lunetta: Braken?s just a compassionate guy, you know? You don?t? Probably because he isn?t.

Vadey: Glad you think so.

EVERYONE: Thank you very much for following this story and leaving your awesome replies!!

WILL THERE BE A BRAKEN STARBLASTER ]|[: TOKYO DRIFT?

When I finished ?The Dark Darkness? I resisted making a sequel. Then I did anyway. This time, I am not opposed to another go-round with Braken and co., but it has to be a good story with plenty of solid new jokes. I do have some bunnies percolating. A few of them are referenced in the joke ?Next Time? section, while some of them directly contradict it (kinda like the ?Next Time? in the first story).

Anyway, what I?m trying to get at is that it?s a possibility but I am not ready to promise anything.

WELL WHAT ARE YOU DOING NEXT THEN?

I hope to soon finish a short story about Aria Diabet (of The Other Side) and her partners-in-crime-solving, which will be an odd mix of humor, mystery, and reality television. No, really.

Other plans include:

a short story about professional thief Alias Sibul inspired by Casino Royale (?06) and Guy Ritchie

a short locked-room mystery in space starring detectives Remy Diabet and Jav Yonx

a short story about Messuni Roserain searching for the answer to why Boba Fett killed her family, and how exactly she became the gunslinger we know

a full-length sequel to Galaxy Noir III/prequel to Galaxy Grey. The detectives get embroiled in the politics of a world at the brink of war as they seek to stop a terrorist organization responsible for the obliteration of an entire city.

Let?s be honest, probably The Braken Supremacy.

WHO IS SCHEDULED TO GET A PM AT THE START OF YOUR NEW PROJECTS?

Currently the Double-Amazing-Extra-Awesome-Slightly-Giddying Permanent Any New Story PM List (invented by Mjsullivan and talkingbanana) stands at:

amidalachick
Corellian_ale
Corran_Fett
Darth_Drachonus
Healer_Leona
Jedi_Eruanne
KELIA
Laine_Snowtrekker
Luton_Plunder
Mjsullivan
NYCitygurl (except GN-verse)
oqidaun
palpyisgod2
Raptor517
talkingbanana
Thumper09
VaderLVR64

 

Okay, I caught up, I finished and my verdict is:


GUILTY








...of writing a hilarious story!
You win!
*confetti*

 

I plead insanity.



Thank you much, Yod! Compliments on a humor fic means a lot coming from you.

 

From left to right, they were MyJusticeTron 2600, Lord Shadowspawn, Morlo the Thunder-King, the current Mandalore, Dorian Immortus, The Arbiter, the Dark Lord of the Law, Palpatine?s pet vornskr, and Zombie Antonin Scalia.

For some reason, this put me in mind of some of the Dilbert cartoons where Dogbert is a lawyer and does such things as "We find the defence attorney poorly dressed and obnoxious; we sentence him to death." I don't know why.

except Morlo who was strictly illiterate in much the same way a priest is strictly religious.

I feel like this phrase, or similar comparisons, need to enter my vocabulary.

?Come forth?Sith Pope!?

The doors opened, allowing Sith Pope to slowly roll inside. Budget cuts had reduced his Mobile to a Segway. Thanks to bubble-boy technology, his ride remained bulletproof. The elderly man?s joints creaked as he dismounted. He wore garish black-and-red robes, with a ridiculously tall hat that made him resemble a demonic Holochess piece. On certain theme sets, he actually was.

*falls off bed*

A thrilling and truly hilarious ending. I'm so glad I found this gem of humor, especially during a time when I needed all the humor I can get! Should you begin a sequel, please PM me also! If laughter is exercise, this story has made me run a marathon.

 

Oh man. I just realized Lawyer Dogbert and Lawyer Snoopy should totally try a case against each other.

Thank you very much for reading and replying! And for giving me this canine legal drama related epiphany.