Beyond - Legends Broken Promises **Dear Diary 2007 Challenge** Thanks for the nom!

The beginning was a shocker with entry number 11. What a start! Poor Tani...I can really relate to her struggles in math. Thankfully her creativity and dramatic ways are intact! Now, those are skills one can use.

Seeing Ben make an appearance in this was such a pleasant surprise. You got his character voice and wisdom down perfectly.

He turned and looked me full in the face. ?It has been my observation that size is usually not a true indication of one?s mettle.?

Ben would know! [Yoda_speak]Size matters not![/speak][face_alien_1]

I adored this part below! Great comedic timing in the ways of an adolescent at wits end.

My lower lip trembled as I sighed. ?I have lost the means to escape the impending darkness that casts its wretched shadow before me.?

He raised an eyebrow.

?I have failed my mathematics pre-test,? I said, sheepishly.

Brilliant!

I could picture Ben keeping his distance and an eye on Luke and Tani as they pulled away. Ever the protective soul.

?Him?? Luke turned the speeder around and headed away from Anchorhead. ?That?s Ben Kenobi.?

Oh, Luke! If you only knew!!! Well, this creates an interesting situation for Tani. She needs a tutor. I wonder if Luke is any good at math??? Hmmm....

Wonderful chapter! Can't wait for more.

 

Great Chapter!!

 

A/N: You survived the angst of a 16 year old writer!

WyoJedi: Well you know Ben, always there to lend a hand. Not unlike certain brothers! Thank you!

Lea-El: The Force works in mysterious ways...perhaps a tutor will show up...somewhere... Thank you for reading.

Jade eyes: "Your dialogue just sparkles". Aw, thanks sweetie!

divapilot: "Riding in cars with boys??" Yeah, but look who the boy is! Thank you Sister-pilot!

Blue milkshake: "And the knight calls a cab for the damsel in distress. Obi-Wan, you sly old Jedi you!"

I don't think he realizes just what he's set in motion. Thank you for reading!

Cpt. Typo: Thank you so much!

VaderLVR: Thanks, Vadey!

Miranda Fair: I wonder if Luke is any good at math??? Hmmm....

Oh you sly thing...how did you know??? Thank you for stopping by!

G Anakin: Thank you! I appreciate you reading!

 

Hey, she ain't no fool. I'd ride in the car with that boy, too.

Poor kid! But how cool that she ran into elder Obi?

Wonderful update!!

 

Thanks, Trace! Forget the window seat, we'd all be clamoring to sit next to our favorite farmboy!

 

<Journal entry # 14>

Just three more months of this school year left. Three more months and three mathematics tests that will decide my future, actually my very existence. Momma said no to my request for a tutor. I appealed to Father who usually is on my side, but he said finances were tight and if Momma said no then it would have to stay no.

I awoke this morning with the very weight of the galaxy on my shoulders. My younger brothers Leul and Maden were arguing as usual making us late for the Farmer?s Alliance meeting at the Darklighter?s. Father dropped us off and drove around back to park. I entered the huge courtyard carrying the blum fruit pies Momma had made for the dessert table. As I placed our large clay platter next to the other various sweets, I could hear Windy Starkiller?s father from the meeting room. Though I couldn?t make out his words, I could hear the anger in his voice. The Empire had rattled his cage no doubt.

Momma had walked over to Lanal Darklighter, Huff?s third wife. I cringed as I watched her simper and fawn all over the woman. Although ten years younger, Momma was her equal in beauty. But that was not enough for my mother.

I popped a piece of cinnamon flat bread into my mouth, savoring the thin wafers as they melted against my tongue. The Lars must be here. No one makes flat bread like Mrs. Lars. I snuck one more piece and then noticed Luke standing by the door closest to the hallway. He had his hands buried in his pockets and was staring across the dining room with an intense look on his face. I turned in the direction he faced to see what had captured his attention and saw?

Camie? She sat alone at one of the long tables sipping from a cup. I turned back again to see Luke stare at her with such longing that I felt my stomach clench. Sweet sands! Luke had a crush on her! Camie?the girl who teases him and calls him wormie for star?s sake. The realization was shocking. How could someone as sweet and caring as Luke like someone so self-centered and cruel?

Luke seemed to square his shoulders as he walked purposefully across the room. When he got to Camie he sat down across from her and began to speak. He had such an open, vulnerable look on his face. But that ungrateful dewback cow wouldn?t even look at him! I wanted to go up to her and slap that bored look off her face. Right about then Fixer walked in with Windy trailing behind him. He saddled up to Luke, patting him on the back but then tipped Luke?s chair back sending him crashing to the floor.

Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared at Luke as he got up, his face burning. Luke?s so called ?friends? laughed at him while he stood there with a tight smile on his face. Camie laughed the loudest as she threaded her arm through Fixer?s and leaned in for a kiss. Luke turned and slowly walked outside as Fixer called, ?It?s was only a joke, Luke! Come on back!?

The suns were just beginning their descent when I found him sitting in his landspeeder sulking. He seemed like a lost bantha cub sitting there, all alone. It struck me that we had something in common?we both felt things strongly. Luke was not the simple farmboy I had thought him to be. He had much more depth and emotion. And he could use a friend?I had to say something.

?She?s not worth it,? I told him, climbing in the passenger?s side.

He looked up with those big beautiful eyes full of unshed tears. ?What??

?Camie, laser brain?she?s not worth your devotion. And don?t try to pretend you don?t have feelings for her. I?m a writer, remember? We?re a pretty observant lot.?

He blushed, wiping his sleeve across his face. ?So? What do you care??

?I care,? I whispered, surprising myself. ?You?re my friend Luke.?

He snorted.

?A real friend,? I said. ?Not like those derelicts in there you call friends. What I can?t understand is why a nice guy like you would even want to be around a self-absorbed girl like Camie.?

Luke sighed. ?I?ve liked her ever since I was twelve years old and her dad started buying water from my uncle for his

 

The suns were just beginning their descent when I found him sitting in his landspeeder sulking. He seemed like a lost bantha cub sitting there, all alone. It struck me that we had something in common?we both felt things strongly. Luke was not the simple farmboy I had thought him to be. He had much more depth and emotion. And he could use a friend?I had to say something.

?She?s not worth it,? I told him, climbing in the passenger?s side.

He looked up with those big beautiful eyes full of unshed tears. ?What??

?Camie, laser brain?she?s not worth your devotion. And don?t try to pretend you don?t have feelings for her. I?m a writer, remember? We?re a pretty observant lot.?

He blushed, wiping his sleeve across his face. ?So? What do you care??

?I care,? I whispered, surprising myself. ?You?re my friend Luke.?

He snorted.

Loved it!

All of the small details you add really give this work life. Like the cinnamon flat bread. Sounded tasty!

 

Great job Jade_Pilot

 

Wow!!! Tani's a true friend and an outspoken one. Great one to have on your side. I also wonder what Luke sees in shallow selfish Camie. She deserves a good thwacking!
Whee!! Glad Tani has a tutor
Lands, JP. I still can't forget how this all started. Tani seems a decent sort, but who knows how things've changed? Her agenda with Luke in the present--is she gonna go to apologize for something or to try to get him back?
I know, that'd be telling. But, hey, sometimes when I get halfway through a mystery novel, I'd peek at the ending ... 'cause the suspense is killing me!
Another wonderful update.
I, like Tani, wanted to bust some serious behinds.

 

*adds Tani to list of people I want to be in my next life*

I love seeing Luke through Tani's eyes. Wonderful update!


I sat thinking furiously, the pieces falling into place. Could Luke be the answer to all my problems?

Of course, he is!

A girl could overdose on farmboy lurve in this fic...

nah. That's not possible.

 

I popped a piece of cinnamon flat bread into my mouth, savoring the thin wafers as they melted against my tongue. The Lars must be here. No one makes flat bread like Mrs. Lars.

Aunt Beru rocks!

Great chapter and thanks for the PM.

Go Tani--crush that mathematics test!!!

 

Poor Luke... and poor Tani having to watch him pine after 'the other woman'. It was so sweet of her to run after him and give her support.

But I think you really showed Luke's personality when Tani's problems came up. Luke forgot all about his own feelings and focused on what she needed. It was such a kind gesture for him to volunteer to tutor her. Those two are so good together!

Wonderful update!

Cheers,
Wyo

 

Aah! Tani found her math tutor and he's cute at that.

Maybe she can help him get over Camie.

loved this post thanks for the PM

 

I just found this, and sweet shards of Alderaan I love it, Jade!!! This reads just like my 14/15 year old diary, I swear. Melodrama and all. Okay, so I could have committed grand larceny to be able to write about my experiences with a certain farmboy. But ya know. Seriously, Tani is way more identifiable than most teenage protagonists; she's incredibly real, somehow. And who couldn't love your Luke? This is one era we don't see much in fanfic, the insecure, pubescent, farmboy who actually is a boy. *sigh* I love this. More later!

 

uh-oh!

Tani threw her arms around Luke! He's an attention starved boy...

I smell trouble.

Great update, gal!

 

He looked up with those big beautiful eyes full of unshed tears. ?What??

?Camie, laser brain?she?s not worth your devotion. And don?t try to pretend you don?t have feelings for her. I?m a writer, remember? We?re a pretty observant lot.?

Yes, we are.

So Tani has a tutor and Luke has another friend. I don't think Luke considers anyone to not be a friend, even when they treat him so shabbily. (Camie is NOT FOR YOU. She is BAD NEWS.)

You write this so naturally! What a wonderful story you are weaving here.

 

How fun was this entry?!?!

Teaching middle school grades and remembering being 11-14 years old rings loud and clear here. Kids, especially around this age, can be so cruel. You captured some moments we can all relate to in some way.

Camie, Fixer, and the crew... Err. Good thing we know better things are in store for Luke and I can only hope Tani.

I enjoyed every part of this, J_P! You write with such ease and I also love the attention you give to details. The cinnamon wafers that Aunt Beru cooked sound delicious. I always thought she was a fine cook.

This section made me smile in how it mirrored parts of the OT:

?Camie, laser brain?she?s not worth your devotion. And don?t try to pretend you don?t have feelings for her. I?m a writer, remember? We?re a pretty observant lot.?

He blushed, wiping his sleeve across his face. ?So? What do you care??

?I care,? I whispered, surprising myself. ?You?re my friend Luke.?

He snorted.

?A real friend,? I said. ?Not like those derelicts in there you call friends. What I can?t understand is why a nice guy like you would even want to be around a self-absorbed girl like Camie.?

I admire your flow of dialogue. Everyone is in character and I love Luke's vulnerability and Tani's compassion.

So now Luke Skywalker can add Math Tutor to his many titles??? He's such a talented (and cute) feller.
Wonderful! Thank you for a fun read!

P.S. - And yes. We writers are a pretty observant group.

 

A/N: Ah, the sweet angst of the teen years. I remember well, my first love. He was a tuba player in the marching band and...ahem...well, I mean thank you all for reading.

VaderLVR: Thank you! divapilot and I were just discussing the topic of detail the other day. Your diary entry really shines with detail.

G Anakin: Thank you!

Jade eyes: "Tani seems a decent sort, but who knows how things've changed? Her agenda with Luke in the present--is she gonna go to apologize for something or to try to get him back?"

Excellent questions! And I'll give you the answers...by and by! Thank you for reading, sweetie!

JediTrace: You're so right! You can never get enough farmboy love!!! Thank you for stopping by!

Blue milkshake: Aunt Beru rocks!!! Thank you!

WyoJedi: Thank you, lil' brother! So how long will it take Luke to wash Camie right out of his hair????

Lea-El: Yep...things are falling into place. Thank you for reading.

furrylittle bantha: "This reads just like my 14/15 year old diary, I swear. Melodrama and all."

Thank you! That's exactly what I'm going for. *sigh* I still remember that tuba player...

ginchy: Trouble??? Now would I write a story like that???? Thanks, ginchy-lee!

divapilot: Thank you sister-pilot! Remember back in HS when the boys were "IN LUVRE" with the mean snotty girls??? Must be hormonal...

MirandaFair: Yes, we are an observant lot, aren't we? Thank you, sweetie!

 

<Journal entry #15>

I love my father.

Gerun Dahl is a fourth generation moisture farmer?he likes to say that he was born with sand in his blood. But unlike most moisture farmers who are tough and stubborn, he is a gentle kind of person. He is certainly a large, well muscled man worthy of the respect he receives from his peers. But deep inside, he is tender and loving, slow to anger.

I?ve often wondered how he and momma came to marry. She is so unlike him?shallow, grasping, concerned with appearances. She is a beautiful woman and knows it. But there is a cruelty to her. I?ve seen her lash out at Father many times for not making enough profit or for not being invited to certain social events. He just shrugs his shoulders and says those are not the most important things in life. A happy home, healthy children and laughter are the things he desires most.

I see momma look at me sometimes?speculating, planning?it makes me shudder. When I sense her cold green eyes on me, I feel my throat constrict and my heart thud in my chest. I fear she will somehow prevent me from leaving this planet to find my own place in the galaxy. I frustrate her to no end. Instead of being concerned with my looks and making friends with the right kinds of people, I have focused entirely on my writing, my future career. I won?t need a man to take care of me, to manipulate and bend to my will. I have chosen not to live the kind of life she has. And that infuriates her.

It is my father who will always sustain me through the hard times. He has given me permission to study with Luke and apply to the university. ?You can be whatever you wish, Tanea M?ai, if you work hard and are true to your own heart.? From him I have learned about character, integrity and most of all?love.

I love my father.


The Table by Tani Dahl


My father?s work on our farm would often take
him away from family and humble dinner table.
His empty chair would softly wink at me.
Reminding me of his place, the solid
teak reflected the warmth of his presence.

I could almost feel him there,
within the wood grain, rigid
inflexible, steadfast.
My hands resting lightly,
upon the well polished plane
so like my father?s face,
a smile of acceptance
a nod of concurrence.

I kick my restless heels against
the sturdy legs that support my
simple childish evening musings,
a thumping sound, a call to arms.
As if the pulsing beat
reverberates beyond,
the solemn distance to touch his heart.

Reluctantly I remove from
this place of contented sanctum.
To clear the surface of repast.
And wipe the emptiness away
until another time,
when he would accompany
us in the hour?s adjournment,
and freely share in daily thoughts,
laughing listening our voices,
eager to be heard in full.
The earnest light is dimmed and candle blown,
the table left dark.
How sad it seems when all
alone waiting for arrival.
I love my father.

 

Gorgeous poetry!!!

Hee!!!!!!! Tani's father reminds me of Alida's.
How cool is that?

 

?You can be whatever you wish, Tanea M?ai, if you work hard and are true to your own heart.? From him I have learned about character, integrity and most of all?love.

I love Tani's father too. Very smart girl in her choice of role model.

 

I can see why Tani loves her father and why she has problems with her mother. I know people like them.

Oh! Shucks! I'm related to people like them.

Good work


I look forward to more.

 

Sounds like Tani and her mom have a complicated relationship. Glad she has a good father to look to.

Love the poetry, lady!

 

Oh, you know I love that poem.



Tani sure doesn't take after her mom. She is much more far thinking than that.


Looking forward to the math lessons (and I think Tani is, too!)

 

Great update. I feel so sorry that Tani has such a difficult time with her mom. That lady sounds positively frightening and domineering. But her dad seems like a big teddy bear.

And the poetry was wonderful. Where did you ever come up with that? Great as always... Bravo

Cheers,
Wyo