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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Saga - PT Crisis of Faith / OCs, CCs, Canon Events / DDC2018, 2nd half

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by TheRynJedi, Jul 7, 2018.

  1. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Brilliant and compelling entry! Sennah is right to think and ponder the things she does, these are very valid points about Ahsoka's guilt, the "wisdom" of the Council, and their "loyalty" to ideals versus political expediency. :p =D=
     
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  2. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 14, 2005
    I indeed hope that meditation with bring clarity and wisdom in its wake.

    Very well written update!
     
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  3. TheRynJedi

    TheRynJedi Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 20, 2018
    <Entry 9><begin playback>

    I felt him, I know I did. It was more than just an echo in the Force.

    Sure, I was sitting in one of his favorite meditation circles in the Temple gardens, and the circle contains the echoes of thousands of Jedi meditating there over countless years.

    But this was different from those echoes. Those sort of echoes are just part of the background. Like a footprint in damp soil: you can see the evidence of the being’s passing, but the being itself has continued on to somewhere else.

    I sat with my lightsaber between my folded hands, where I could better feel my crystal's harmonics. It's really the only thing I can do well with my saber: use it as a meditation aid. They're odd things, Kyber crystals, one of the few non-living things I can easily sense in the Force. They don't have a melody of their own, they harmonize with the melody of their intended wielder. Mine has sung to me clearly since I found it.

    When my clan was taken to Ilum, I found my crystal so quickly that I tried to convince Master Yoda to let me help the other younglings find theirs, I could hear their crystals’ harmonies calling out to them. He explained: not rushing to others’ aid too quickly, my trial was. Learn patience, I must.

    I sat in the center of a mosaic of the symbol of the Jedi Order, polished smooth by ages of Jedi past. I began my meditation by focusing on the symbol beneath me. The bright spark at the center, the Force within all living things. The beam of light that reaches up from it into the beyond. The wings that surround and protect that light, like an avian protecting its young, yet not enclosing it completely, so that it may grow and progress.

    I reached out into the Living Force around me, feeling the grass around the mosaic, the tiny spark in each one. Past the grass to the trees with their ancient solidness. Beyond the trees to the other Jedi and groundskeepers in the gardens, carefully filtering out their thoughts and emotions (It took me many years to be able to do that, to reach out to feel other beings without overwhelming myself with hearing them). I reached out beyond the Temple, feeling the bustling city-planet beyond, the ebb and flow of Life, beginning, ending, being generated, being squandered.A passing thought on what it might feel like to create a life myself, then discarding the thought as I was discarding all others, just feeling, not thinking.

    As my awareness drifted beyond Coruscant, things became more… abstract. There are Jedi for whom that expanse beyond: the Cosmic Force, is navigable. Reaching out to touch the future, or the past, and interpreting its songs. I do not often seek it out, I am not comfortable there. But sometimes, it reaches out to me. Giving me confusing, difficult to understand melodies.

    As I floated there, unaffixed to anything in particular, just, feeling. I started to feel something, a presence, somewhat diffused: individual notes, floating in the Force. They gathered, a few bits at a time, notes becoming chords, becoming phrases, becoming a song. A familiar melody...

    Until suddenly, I heard Master Qui-Gon's song as clearly as if he had been sitting there beside me.

    I felt his smile, the one I always felt when he greeted me: “Hello, Little One.”

    I confess, I started wondering if I was going crazy, if maybe I was reaching into the past somehow. I thought briefly that I should tell someone, maybe Master Yoda.

    But then I heard him speak to me, I swear it on my life. Like he was sitting there with me in the garden: “Shh, not yet. Patience, Little One.”

    I opened my eyes, half expecting to see Master Qui-Gon Jinn, sitting right there in front of me. Smiling at me with that twist at the corner of his mouth. The somewhat mischievous look in his eye that I would see just before he’d tell me we were going to take one of his not-quite-orthodox trips out of the Temple.

    But, there was no one there. His song was gone, dissolving back into the symphony of the Living Force.

    I don't know completely what it meant. But I will wait, and be patient.

    <End of Entry>
     
    Last edited: Oct 2, 2018
  4. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    That was gorgeous & lyrical: comparing the various aspects of the Force to melodies. =D= =D= Even Kyber crystals have harmonies. :cool:
     
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  5. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    So glad to have finally caught up with this! I'll do a better job commenting in detail on installments to come, but I do want to say how much I have been enjoying this first-person look into this fascinating character of yours—she's such a wonderful addition to our board's rich collection of OCs. :cool: Wonderful reflections from Sennah all around: on attachments and love, on the nature of the Force, on her own Jedi career so far, on her impressions of some familiar names like Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, and Anakin, on the changes the Clone Wars and the whole Jedi-as-military business has wrought on the Order in general—and of course on her own species and origins. There's such a note of nostalgia and bittersweetness there, and understandably so—all the more so for us readers if we know the circumstances under which she was taken from her people (as described in "Destiny"). And I just love the way the Force and Force presences manifest to her as music: that's just so cool and beautiful, and a perfect fit for the character and her highly musical species, of course. Who really needs telekinesis when one has such a beautiful and unique way of connecting to the living Force? (I do get her frustration with the process lightsaber building, given how big a deal that is for a padawan, but I love the way she is still able to use her saber as an aid to meditation, listening to the song of its crystal and connecting to the Force that way.)

    I love the role you've given Dex in Sennah's search for her origins; our favorite Besalisk restaurateur would indeed be plugged in to the life of the city in a way most Jedi wouldn't be. And who does his information lead her to but DANYAL! [face_dancing] [face_dancing] [face_dancing] Good old Danyal, bringing his beautiful music to the Coruscant club scene! And what a beautiful meeting, or rather reunion, with his mention of "remembering" and her supplying the missing note he can't whistle anymore because of an injury I remember well—symbolic, too, methinks. [face_love] And what an effect it has on her when she meets and hears him and imagines him holding and touching her the way he holds his guitar. I don't blame her for being alarmed at that feeling, given her Jedi upbringing—but I also don't blame her for feeling totally fascinated and wanting more. And I am guessing it's no accident that so soon after that one reunion of sorts, Sennah experiences another when she hears Qui-Gon's Force-song so clearly during her meditation. Are they connected at all? I have to wonder... [face_thinking]

    Keep up the mighty fine work—I'm loving this character so far and can't wait to see what will be next for her, and I'll do a better job about following from here on out, I promise! @};-
     
  6. TheRynJedi

    TheRynJedi Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 20, 2018
    It's been fun to share her and wonderful hear that people like her. She's been a character in the back of my mind, my personal SW avatar, for so long. I've been having a great time finally actually telling her story. Until now it's been a nebulous outline with only "Destiny" written out.

    It's been an exploration of the character, trying to work out who she knows and what she thinks, and what leads her to make the decisions she will end up making. Things I've been needing to work out for her, this was a good excuse. Lets me touch on lots of little bits of history and work out how they affect her.

    She can hear the SW soundtrack, basically. :)

    I love Dex, and had a vague idea to use him. Then I read @GregMcP 's story for the Underrepresented challenge, and thought "yep, gonna use Dex, he's perfect".

    Very much, whether she gets it right now or not, she's the missing note that will let him be whole again. He's still dealing with the trauma of that day, almost ten years later.
    He's still not the musical genius he was before, partially because he's ashamed at still being obsessed with that "mystery maiden in the Jedi tower". He hates himself for that rediculous obsession, he knows he'll probably never be able to actually be with her. So he feels like he's letting down not just his clan, but his entire incredibly rare species by not giving up on this obsession and letting himself be involved with some other Ryn woman. But he knows he'll never be able to devote his entire heart to someone else, it wouldn't be fair to her. So he plays music to earn money for his clan, but he's just not the artist he used to be.

    I wrote this entry before writing "A Little Bit of You", I gave him the injury, but hadn't settled on what had happened. It was writing this entry that sparked the plot idea for the "One-Hit-Wonder Songfic challenge" story.

    She's fraking terrified. Most other Jedi dealt with those sort of feelings back when they were teenagers, and have gotten over them, or left the order when they couldn't. She's never even felt like that before. They forged an emotional bond when she healed him, but she'd never been close enough to feel it before.

    Hmm, maybe... The Force works in mysterious ways... ;)

    I have the next 2.5 entries written. I can barely wait to post them. Things... may not go the way you think.

    Thank you for the comments.

    I need to work on being this detailed in my feedback.

    (Btw, I was serious about wanting Sennah and Shulma to meet, we need to compare their timelines...)
     
    Last edited: Oct 2, 2018
  7. GregMcP

    GregMcP Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 7, 2015
    :). You @ me, and I come a readin'

    I quite like your flavour for your Jedi. A healer, of body and soul. In tune with The Force flowing about as if music in the air.

    And I enjoyed the Detective Obi-Wan in Attack of the Clones feel for a few chapters, including a bit of Dexter.

    Yeah. It's all well visualised. A lot to read, but it flowed along nicely.

    I look forward to reading where it's all heading.
     
  8. TheRynJedi

    TheRynJedi Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 20, 2018
    Bwahaha, my brilliant plan to gather more readers worked.
    Kidding, I just wanted to give credit for the backup on the idea of using the awesome Dexter.

    Hmm, maybe I should randomly tag more people, lol.

    Feel free to read more of my other stories, a list is linked in my sig.
     
    Last edited: Oct 2, 2018
  9. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 14, 2005
    Loved your latest update for being vibrant with the Force itself. The text really carried me away while I was reading it.
     
  10. TheRynJedi

    TheRynJedi Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 20, 2018
    <Entry 10:><begin playback>

    The Temple is in chaos tonight. It may be outwardly calm, Jedi are good at that. But inside, they're reeling.

    Padawan Ahsoka was cleared of all charges…

    ...because Padawan Bariss Offee confessed to the bombing.

    I wish I could say "I can't understand why", but I can. I don't agree with what she did, killing and injuring beings is never a good answer. But I find myself understanding the sentiment behind it. She has lost all faith in the Order…

    Like I am beginning to.

    The Council couldn't even tell Ahsoka was telling the truth about being innocent. Anakin Skywalker had to track down the truth himself, he and Padawan Offee had a lightsaber battle in the dormitory wing when he confronted her.

    If the Council would expel Ahsoka for suspicion, what would they do to me? I’ve broken the rules, I am planning to break them further tonight by meeting with my people. It is expressly forbidden. Knowing your family can lead to attachment to them, and losing the neutral objectivity that Jedi must maintain in order to serve the citizens of the Republic fairly.

    Therein lies our problem, though. The Jedi are supposed to be servants of The Force, and serve all creatures. The Jedi allied with the Republic all those years ago because we had similar goals, peace and stability. The Jedi have slowly evolved to become a subsidiary of the Republic. The Republic is starting to lose sight of its objectivity, and the Jedi are being dragged along.

    I just… I have to be careful, I cannot risk being caught tonight. And I cannot continue to break the rules.

    I could just leave... I could walk away like Ahsoka did today.

    There have been more than a few Jedi who have left the Order over this War. Bardan Jusik, a member of my youngling clan, left over a year ago. I was away on a mission at the time, I didn't get a chance to hear his reasons personally, or to say goodbye. Olana, another of my clan mates, says that he was opposed to the Clones being used like slaves.

    A few weeks ago, Olana came back from a mission, she said she ran into Bardan. He’s joined a group of his people, Mandalorian freelancers (they are staying far out of Mandalor’s recent troubles, thankfully). I hope he stays safe, that’s a dangerous life. But then, so can be the life of a Jedi, lately.

    No, I can't leave. I still have a responsibility to the Jedi, they need medics and healers. Besides, I still don't know what that was, last night. A vision? Master Qui-Gon’s… apparition... said to wait, be patient. I have a feeling I will be needed here somehow.

    I have to tell the Ryn goodbye tonight. I cannot risk getting in trouble with the Council. I am needed here.

    <End of Entry>
     
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  11. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Nice hearing of Olana and Bardan ;) Very well written and understandable reactions from Sennah over the recent upheavals about the bombing and what the Jedi role is, really, and her own. And her final decision to stay and provide whatever help she can whenever the situation calls for it.
     
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  12. TheRynJedi

    TheRynJedi Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 20, 2018
    I did a bit of Wookiepedia research a few months back to see if there were any Canon or Legends Jedi who were near the same age as Sennah (who was born in 44 BBY). It was mostly for a planned future story about Sennah and her youngling clan getting their kyber crystals. I found those two (and Ferus Olin).

    Also found along the way that Sennah and Zeb are the same age. :)
     
  13. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    Very believable and understandable whirl of feelings from Sennah here—I'm not surprised to see how deeply affected she is by the temple bombing and all the kerfuffle of intrigue and false accusations surrounding it. Nor am I surprised to see it all leading into the "crisis of faith" of this story's title. I think Sennah's right on target with her sense of what's happening to the Jedi, and while it's similar to Ahsoka's, she (Sennah) is approaching it in a very different way, and of course there's the additional dimension of reconnecting to her people at work here, too. Sennah has just made a very difficult decision here in choosing to stay with the Jedi and "telling the Ryn goodbye"—though at the same time, it feels very much like it could be one of those "cast thy bread upon the waters" situations, too, and I am going to guess the goodbye won't be for good quite yet. [face_thinking]

    Sennah is navigating difficult waters with so much levelheadedness and grace. I know you have big things in store for her as this tale goes on, and I'm going to keep sending all possible vibes of courage and encouragement her way. @};-
     
  14. TheRynJedi

    TheRynJedi Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 20, 2018
    <Entry 11:><begin playback>

    *A deep sigh, somewhat shaky, perhaps tearful*

    It's done. I’ve met my people, and turned them away.

    It was hard.

    So hard.

    To see, to know, that you are not alone, that other beings like you not only exist, but love you, miss you, and think about you every day.

    I can still feel them, out there in the City. Meeting them forged an emotional link, like I worried it might. I don't think I’m going to be able to break it. They're relieved, thankful, hurt, but resolved. The male my age, Danyal, his song is especially hurt, and very, very sad.

    I can't keep listening to that link, it hurts.

    Maybe someday I could track them down again.

    No, not now, maybe not ever. I have to accept it. They gave me away, and as much as they may regret it (as much as HE may hate it), I am a Jedi. I am needed here, and I cannot let them distract me.

    I left the Temple just after my previous journal entry, when night had finally fallen. It was actually good to put a bit of distance between me and the emotional turmoil in the Temple. I left my Jedi accoutrements behind this time. My saber waited for me here in my quarters. I packed away my robes, outer tunic and utility belt in a knapsack soon after leaving the Temple grounds. I continued on to the meeting in just my sleeveless undertunic, pants and boots. I felt very exposed, but I looked more like an average Coruscanti. I’m glad I don't have my Padawan braid any more.

    As I made my way back to the Uscru Entertainment District, I was amazed that it had only been two days since I had made that trip before. So much has happened.

    I found the alley behind the Ace of Flasks, the one that I fled through two days ago. There were presences there. I stopped at the corner and peeked around.

    There they were, three of them. The dark brown-furred male: Danyal, the guitar player; he sat on a crate looking sullen (seeing him made my fur stand on end, again). Standing near him was a dark grey-furred male, he had light grey hair and a long mustache with ends that extended down past his chin. He wore a patch over his left eye, the side of his face around it was scarred, it looks like he had been burned once, long ago. Leaning against the grey one, her arm around his waist, his arm around her shoulders, was a Ryn female. Her light auburn hair and slightly darker reddish fur was almost the same shade as mine. Though her fur is starting to frost grey with age here and there.

    They were conversing quietly in Ryn, which ceased as I stepped around the corner and they turned to see me.

    The female Ryn gasped and put a hand to her mouth. She wore many colorful rings and bracelets, they glittered in the light as her hand trembled.

    The grey one grinned broadly and called out my name as I walked the meter or so into the alley towards them. The elders both reached out and pulled me into a tight embrace between them. They chatted excitedly at me, to each other, to Danyal, one over the other, too fast for me to follow. The barrage of melodic language paused, they stepped back and looked at me expectantly. I realized that they had asked me questions and were waiting for the answers.

    I tried to decipher what they had said, but it had been too much, and too complex. I shook my head.

    “I am sorry. I do not speak your language.” I told them in Basic. Stars above, I’m so ashamed of that.

    Danyal muttered something in Ryn. I did not catch his words. He felt bitter and a bit smug, it was an “I told you so” sort of feeling.

    “Oh, not a problem, dear one,” the grey one said, switching to heavily accented Basic. He smiled at me, but I could feel a deep sadness from both him and the female. I think their language is very important to them.

    “We are so glad to see you again, Sennah.” He continued. “Do you remember your Uncle Gandan and Aunt Eda?”

    I closed my eyes and listened, feeling their songs in the Force. I nodded, opened my eyes again, and told them I did, a bit, though I did not realise it was their presences in particular I had always remembered.

    They asked how I was, if the Jedi had been kind to me. If I had learned how to use the gifts they had seen when I was a youngling. Had I been here on on Coruscant all my life? Or had I spent the time traveling the galaxy helping beings across many worlds? They said they had arrived on Coruscant five years ago, and had tried to contact me at the time, but were turned away by Temple security.

    I gave simple, noncommittal answers. The realization that they had been here --on Coruscant-- for so long, that was a shock.

    They asked if I would like to come with them, to meet the other dozen or so clanmates and kin here.

    I had to disappoint them. The meeting had gone on too long already.

    “I am sorry,” I told them, using every ounce of my Jedi training to remain calm and neutral, yet polite. “I thank you for your dedication, and your perseverance in wanting to see me again. But I cannot. I am already breaking the Order’s rules in meeting you here tonight. I came tonight because I told Danyal’s friends I would, and a Jedi keeps their word. But I should not have even sought you out in the first place. It was a moment of weakness after a time of great stress. It would not be fair, or right, for me to be able to have a relationship with my birth family when every other Jedi cannot. It is simply what you agreed to when you sent me away with Master Qui-Gon Jinn.”

    The two elders felt devastated. I felt more sorry for Danyal, though. He stayed seated on the crate throughout the encounter, leaning back against the wall, his arms folded across his chest. His mood felt dark, and hopeless, by the time I finished my speech.

    “How is Master Qui-Gon Jinn, by the way?” Aunt Eda asked, seeming to try to change the subject, and keep me talking. “Has he taught you many things?”

    “He was killed, about thirteen years ago.” I replied, trying to be matter-of-fact, but my voice wavered towards the end.

    The two elder Ryn reflexively raised their eyes to the distant, barely-seen sky above and muttered something, a litany for the dead, something about dancing among the stars.

    “He… He is, actually, I think.” I replied, remembering how I had felt his presence: diffused across the Force. “Out there somewhere, keeping an eye on me.”

    They both beamed at me, realizing I had understood at least some of their language.

    “I have to go,” I said then. “I will be missed if I stay much longer.”

    “Is there anything we can do for you, dear one?” Uncle Gandan asked.

    “No, there is not,” I told them. “But, there is something you can do for a friend. A young female Togruta is without a home tonight. I do not know where she may have gone after leaving the Temple this afternoon, or what friends she might have in the City. But if you can find Ahsoka Tano, please give her this datachip. Let her know it is from me. Whatever love, caring or resources you would give to me, please, give to her. She has suffered a great betrayal and needs some friends right now.”

    The chip I gave them contains my personal communicator frequency and a message letting Ahsoka know that the bearers of the chip are friends she can trust. I prepared it with the hope that my instincts, and memories, of my Ryn family were correct: That they are kindly people who will help someone in need. I had been quietly feeling them out in the Force as we spoke, and received a confirmation that my instincts were correct.

    They told me they would find her, that they have lots of contacts among the kinder people in the Coruscanti undercity. Someone would be able to direct them to her.

    I thanked them, bowed, and walked away. I did not look back. I felt their sadness as I went. If I had turned around to see it, I don’t think I would have been able to go.

    I hope they can forgive me someday.
    <End of Entry>
     
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  15. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Oh! What a bittersweet reunion! Sennah is selfless & thoughtful thinking of Ahsoka and asking that she be helped in her distressing situation. You can really feel Sennah's sense of genuine loss and regret at having to sever ties with a family she never thought to find again. As future events unfold, will she come to regret that even more? [face_thinking]
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2018
  16. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    Oh, oh, oh. OUCH. What a wrench for Sennah. There they are—her dear Uncle Gandan and Aunt Eda (I remember both of them—dear folks!), specially come out to meet her—a moment Sennah's been waiting for for so long. And she hears this amazing news that there are more of them there too—she has to turn down their offer to go back with them. But even so an emotional link has been formed, over which she can still hear their songs (I imagine Danyal's sounding very plangent and Gipsy Kings-like). I guess this is one of those moments where her ability to "hear" those Force-songs is more of a curse than a blessing, because they'll be a constant reminder that there's simply going to be no going back to the way things were, to the time before she met them. Her mix of emotions here is so bittersweet, so believable, as is the way she goes between "maybe I'll see them again" and "no, not likely" modes—though I'm pretty sure I know which will be the case in the end [face_shhh] (and yes, Sennnah, I am certain they'll forgive you @};- ). I love that at least she is able to commend Ahsoka to them, and I know that if they do come across her (and I'll be curious to see if they do...) they will treat her with hospitality and grace as Sennah's friend.

    As always, I'm looking forward to seeing what's next for Sennah, especially now that she has forged this very important and heartfelt new connection to her clan—again, now that it's forged it's never going to be unforged! <3
     
  17. TheRynJedi

    TheRynJedi Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 20, 2018
    <Entry 12:><begin playback>

    It's been a while since my last journal recording. I’ve been focusing on my work in the medical wing. Master Healer Rig Nema gave me a research project to help her with.

    A few days ago, a Clone Trooper killed Master Tiplar while on a mission. It has been a great shock to the Temple, and especially to Master Tipli, who was something rare in the Temple: her twin sister. Very few Jedi even know their blood families, much less get to grow up with them.

    *Sigh* Family... someone in my clan has tried to contact me. They sent me a message last week, text only, on the com frequency I gave them to give to Ahsoka. I hadn't gotten anything from that connection since Ahsoka's first, and only, message: a brief thank you for the help she had received from the Ryn, and assurance that she was going to be ok.

    This new message is in Ryn. Which is a good way to keep someone at the Temple from being able to understand it if it's intercepted, but it also means I may not be able to read half of it.

    I have been avoiding it. I do not want to develop any further attachments to them. Telling them I could not see them again was difficult enough. I can't allow myself to become that conflicted again. I don't know if I should even open it...

    Deep breath, Sennah, refocus.

    My project, yes.

    The Kaminoans are not allowing the Jedi doctors access to the “defective” clone, as they've been calling him. It's so strange, we Jedi medics been allowed to put clone troops back together plenty of times before. There's been diseases, injuries, and all kinds of conditions we've treated clone troops for, why is this one different?

    Master Nema gave me a project to investigate our records for any other reports of Clone Trooper aggression like this, so that we would have some data when we were allowed to assist the investigation. I did not find anything in the Temple archives, so I had sent a request to access Republic records.

    As of an hour ago, however, it became a moot point. The military and the Kaminoans have taken it completely out of Jedi hands, the Supreme Chancellor let them completely block us out. So, my project is on hold indefinitely.

    I guess I will find something else to work on.
    <End of Entry>
     
    Last edited: Dec 13, 2018
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  18. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    So many intriguing things, the medical investigation; then it gets taken out of the Jedi's jurisdiction; :p and the personal message! I am not surprised Sennah is conflicted/torn about even opening it.
     
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  19. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    Hmm! So much is going on for Sennah right now, between this mysterious killing by the clone (about which I have a guess... hint: LXVI), the sudden yanking of the project from the hands of the Jedi (again, I can guess what might be behind that), and the message from her clanmates. She has much to occupy her mind both on the larger Jedi level and on a more personal level. And family attachment is the theme that runs through it all, in a way: a clone whose behavior has set him apart from his "brothers," a Jedi mourning the loss of her twin sister and fellow Jedi at the hands of said clone, and Sennah's long-lost family coming back to find her. That they did so even after she told them she couldn't visit them again says a lot for their determination—and I think maybe they can also pick on how conflicted she actually is. [face_thinking] In the meantime, with the investigation around the clone on hold, I wonder what she will find to work on; it seems like she could use something to take her mind off these various heavy matters, at least for now. Though I somehow know that the matter of the "defective" clone is going to come back to haunt all of the Jedi, very soon... [face_nail_biting]

    These are tense times for Sennah—I'm sending good vibes for hope and strength her way, though I know she has immense inner strength of her own, too. @};-
     
  20. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 2018
    there are those, usually non-Jedi, who don't think of Clone troopers as “real people”.

    I'm betting that's what they tell themselves so they don't have to feel sympathy for the troops as they bleed and die on the battlefield.


    I wasn't prepared for it, how could anyone be?

    How indeed? They have to pretend the patient is just a number, just a blank slate, to keep from tearing themselves apart.


    For every Master Windu, Master Obi-Wan, or Knight Skywalker, there are a dozen like me, who leave the battlefield scarred in more ways than one.

    Very good line and great line of thinking by the author. =D=


    “Your talents lie elsewhere, Little One, no Jedi is good at everything.”

    Good advice. I always liked Qui-Gon. :)


    Entry 2


    you look forward to the day you will be a Jedi Knight, it's when you can sort of relax

    Right. I'm sensing that's when the real trials begin. [face_party]


    The fact that Anakin passed his Trial a few years ago and is no longer technically his responsibility hasn't lessened Obi-Wan's worry about him

    He's just a worry-Wan-Wort. :p


    muttered something about how he'd forgotten how very perceptive I was

    In other words: Out of my head, Padawan. :p


    I think he would have abandoned the Jedi Order for her if she had asked him to.

    Ah, Obi having a little quiet time away from the Jedi, nudge nudge. [face_mischief]



    but wouldn't there be more happiness too?

    And more passion and less serenity. More hopeless romances and unrequited love. Powerful beings, locked in heated turmoil with one another... What's not the love about the idea? :D

    Love it so far. Only read the first two entries, but I'll be back for more!
     
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  21. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 2018
    Trying to get caught up...

    Entry 3

    there are rumors that it was a deliberate attack... and a Jedi was responsible.

    Maybe my favorite Sith is setting the Jedi up, perhaps? [face_devil]


    Entry 4

    Have I done the right thing seeking them out?

    Only time - and the author - will tell, I suppose. :D


    Entry 5

    the major suspect in the bombing is dead, and Padawan Tano was blamed.

    Sounds like the work of Darth Sidious to me. :D Play each side against the other.


    I sometimes wonder what Master Qui-Gon would have thought about this war.

    That would have been interesting, wouldn't it? I liked Qui-Gon better than Obi-Wan.


    Entry 7


    He plucked the string again, and adjusted the pitch again, until it was perfectly in tune with his whistle.

    Huh, perfect pitch. I can't tune my guitar to my own pitch. It would be... bad. :p


    Enjoying this muchly. Good work. =D=
     
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  22. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 2018
    All right, I'm finally caught up!

    Entry 7


    It scared me. It’s scaring me now just talking about it hours later.

    I'll bet.


    Getting over that biological urge that can lead to attachment, loss, jealousy, and pain.

    Or, you could just get it on. [face_mischief]


    What's wrong with me?

    Yes, give in to the dark side. [face_devil]


    Entry 8


    Is something keeping them from hearing the truth in her song?

    A MegaPowerful Sith Lord, perhaps. :emperor:


    Entry 9


    Learn patience, I must.

    Learn to speak so others might understand easily, he should. Nine hundred years old, he is, grammatically structure a sentence, he should.


    It took me many years to be able to do that, to reach out to feel other beings without overwhelming myself with hearing them

    A good distinction.


    I felt his smile, the one I always felt when he greeted me: “Hello, Little One.”

    Yay, she found Qui-Gon. [face_party]


    Entry 10


    The Council couldn't even tell Ahsoka was telling the truth about being innocent.

    More clouds of the Dark Side, they are. :emperor:


    servants of The Force, and serve all creatures.

    Serve the Servants, oh no. [face_KurtCobain] :D


    Entry 11


    She wore many colorful rings and bracelets, they glittered in the light as her hand trembled.

    The Ryn sound like gypsies. :cool:


    Entry 12


    The military and the Kaminoans have taken it completely out of Jedi hands, the Supreme Chancellor let them completely block us out.

    Yeeesssss. Goooood. :emperor:


    Excellent so far and the tension has been palpable, or should I say, Palpatine? [face_devil]
     
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  23. TheRynJedi

    TheRynJedi Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 20, 2018
    They prefer to be called Romani (or their own regional sub-culture, e.g. Sinti, Gitano, etc). To most of them, ‘gypsy’ is actually just like the ‘n-word’ is to a black person. It is based on the (erroneous) idea that they came from Egypt (they actually came from northern India originally), and its been used to ridicule and oppress their people for centuries.

    The Ryn are directly based on the Romani. The author who created them (James Luceno) had watched a documentary about the Romani and decided to base a GFFA race on them.

    http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Ryn/Legends

    I may be wee bit obsessed with the species. But I do have a good friend who is part Sinti (German) Romani, and she has made very sure people understand her people’s history and continuing struggles.


    Thank you for your comments and feedback. The next post will be coming probably next week. :)
     
    Last edited: Nov 17, 2018
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  24. TheRynJedi

    TheRynJedi Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 20, 2018
    (Argh, can't wait any more, want to post it all now and get this story told so I can start posting the follow-up story)


    <Entry 13:><begin playback>

    Master Yoda has been unwell. Master Nema said he has been hearing voices, well, one voice specifically: Master Qui-Gon’s. She says she and the Council are convinced that he's suffering from some sort of mental disorder, brought on by stress. They say he can't possibly be hearing the voice of someone who has passed into the Force.

    Master Nema is thinking of trying something drastic tomorrow, trying to help Master Yoda sort out what may be some sort of psychic trauma. Master Nema's procedure will put him in a sensory deprivation tank, and then reduce his oxygen intake to barely minimum, to force him into a deep meditation.

    I voiced my concerns as she described the process to me, but she assured me that it was a technique she had researched carefully. I trust the Master Healer to know what's best, she has been treating patients at the Temple far longer than I have. I guess I will obey my superior's instructions, as I have been taught.

    But, I keep thinking back to my experience while in deep meditation weeks ago. Should I tell Master Yoda what I felt? What I heard? Qui-Gon’s voice, if that's what it truly was, told me to not tell anyone, to be patient, to wait. Perhaps this is what he was wanting me to wait for? For Master Yoda to hear him too? Or am I possibly suffering from the same affliction as Master Yoda?

    No, it's not some madness, it was too real. I heard his song... Didn't I?

    I'm certainly not going to be able to talk to Master Yoda tonight, the Council has him under close supervision.

    I have infirmary duty again tomorrow, maybe I might have a chance to talk to Master Yoda after the proceidure?

    Dare I talk to him? He will be able to feel the conflict in me, I know it.

    I opened the message...

    It was from the guitar player, my childhood friend, Danyal. As I thought, I was not able to understand most of it. The parts I was able to translate...

    He wants to see me again, I am sure of that part. He apologizes. Much of it was difficult to decipher, I think it is perhaps metaphorical? A poem, maybe? Or a song?

    Stars I don't want to know, but yet I do. When I reach out to him... I feel his song is almost as conflicted as mine, but often submerged in a darkness. Not the darkness of evil, just, sadness. Like perpetual clouds that block out the warmth of sunlight.

    I want to help him, to heal him, but it is not something I could heal without imposing my will onto his mind.

    It's just part of my nature, wanting to fix things, to heal people. But mental wounds are difficult, and are best healed most permanently by the one suffering from them, as the Doctor is doing for Master Yoda.

    A talented healer (especially one like me, skilled in reading thoughts and emotions) could 'fix' a mentally ill person by changing their thoughts. But that slips into mind control, and manipulation, and that is the Dark Side.

    Someone like me could begin with good intentions, but where do you stop? How much of a person's personality IS their moods and thoughts? Irreparable harm could be done to their mind.

    Over time, with patience and cooperation, I probably could help him out of that darkness, but too much else could develop along the way...

    I can't help him. Not and still remain a Jedi Knight.

    <End of Entry>

    For those who may or may not be familiar with the Clone Wars cartoon, the previous entry was set during Season Six, Episodes 1-2. This entry and the next two are during the events of Episode 11: Voices
     
    Last edited: Dec 13, 2018
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  25. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    A very compelling message from Danyal and worrisome about Yoda. Sennah's reflections about healing techniques, very interesting, and it is a fine balancing act when using empathic/telepathic skills.
     
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