Darwin Awards for Prequel Jedi stupidity- Who were the worst?

"When he finally senses that something is wrong, he turns to see his own Clone troopers raise their rifles to him. He actually managed to block several of their shots until being overcome by multiple fire."

He even managed to kill two of them *wipes away a tear* poor Ki adi...

"Anyway, I don't see what might be wrong with Agen and Saesee dying as quickly as they do. I doubt they expected Palpatine would come them as like that, and with a lightsaber, no less."

The very simple problem is that Palpatine stops, if Lucas just cut the shot with Palpatine raising his sabre to stab Kolar, it would look like Palpatine just flew into his chest, and would be damned cool.

 

One of them moves their lightsabre out of the way so that they can be killed if you look hard enough.

 

Yeah, that fight is pretty bizarre; in the second or so Palpatine is standing in front of him, Kolar just turns to look at Mace Windu for some reason instead of trying to parry.

 

I really think a Monty python-esque charge while shouting "ATTACK" would of been better.

 

"Hey look Mace, have you ever seen a 70 year old guy who could do that-"

 

"Hey look Mace, have you ever seen a 70 year old guy who could do that-"

Neg that. 101 year-old guy.

 

Mace: Well Dooku did do that forwards flip think at the beginning of the film so- holy **** you're dead!

 

Agen Kolar: What can be said. Sucks for you Agen.

Ki Adi Mundi: Wasn't he on a bridge? Here's an idea genius, while using your lightsaber to deflect as much fire as possible, make a bee line over the side, and hope nothing bad is at the bottom.

Barriss Offee: Despite the fact that she got high, and couldn't enforce the speed limit on Dagobah, that didn't actually kill her. Humiliated her perhaps. Made storm troopers and starfleet security actually look better. Likely. Actually kill her. No. Besides, NOTHING can beat a sexy green chick, played by an even sexier actress.

 

Like the ground? If you fall far enough, and fast enough, that would work just as well as a blaster.
Obi's just lucky he hit water. but that still would have hurt.

 

A couple of thoughts --

First, if these are the DARWIN Awards, then the Darwins are usually for those who service all humanity who do something stupid and get themselves killed and thus pull themselves out of the gene pool, doing a service for us all. In theory.<g>

Technically, going by those guidelines, you have to not include Yoda, Obi-wan and Anakin since they didn't die -- at least not it RotS. I'm not saying they didn't do stupid things -- just according to the usual Darwin Award rules, they don't count.

I'd personally not include some Jedi like Aayla. Yes, I helped originate her but what I was told from LFL was that the Jedi sensed NOTHING from the clones and she had no reason to suspect troops that had been loyal to her. The real problem, to me, is why didn't anybody ask who authorized these clones in the first place? It was a ready made army that the Republic and the Jedi just sort of accepted.(?!) Same would be true for a lot of the Jedi that were surprised.

Kolar and Seasee Tiin? looks bad but my understanding is that Palpatine is moving so fast they don't have time to react and Mace just barely gets his defense up. Still, it looks bad.

However, I'd go with Mace in a heartbeat. Love the character but, instead of talking and justifying himself to ANAKIN, he could have and should have just aced Palps then and there.

Let me also nominate Dooku. Really goes out like a punk at the hand of a punk. Hears Palps telling Anakin to waste him and doesn't rat him out? Served Palps faithfully and gets tossed for the new kid. THERE'S a chump, IMO.<g>

Quin? Well, maybe the full story isn't told there. Yet.<g> BUT if you want to include him for getting himself so tangled in the Dark Side that he decides only HE can save the galaxy -- yeah, I'd say nominate him. <g>

-- John

 

Dooku got totally punked - he should have learned to expect betrayal from a sith lord.

thanks for the bit above that i bolded.. lots of ppl claim that the clones are teh cool for being able to take down the jedi.. but it's pretty easy to be able to shoot someone in the back when they think you've got their back.

yes.. the problem is that the jedi accepted their role in the military too handily without asking too many questions on where the clones came from... or what their training regimen was. when selecting a school for your kid, always look over the curriculum...

Kaminoan: here's the courseload for their 3rd year:
'combat training - hand-to-hand'
'sign language'
'combat medicine, advanced'
'secret instructions to be carried out without fail'
'camouflage and cover'

Jedi inspector: wait.. what's that 4th one?

Kaminoan: huh? umm... nothing.. just a course in civics..

 

That the Jedi took the command of the clone army in the first place was they biggest mistake. Why not led an army of people they know and trust? After all, there are supposedly quite a high number of members of the Jedi agricorps, who have gotten most of the Jedi training, have some Force ability etc. Why let them continue talking to the plants and charge on war with a group of cloned question marks behind your back? Of course, there are not 1,2 million of them, but wouldn´t it have been best to let the Republic hire mercenaries to lead the clones and the Jedi to fight with their own for the Republic?

 

well, that might not have worked too well either... remember, the clones were trained to obey Jedi... they might not want to work for mercenaries. one problem with some mercenaries is that they tend to value survival over the mission, and your opponent might just be able to bribe them into betrayal.

the jedi agricorps - they might have some jedi training, but they're not an army. they probably don't have the experience in things like: weapons, demolitions, combat tactics, space combat, ship tactics, espionage... if they are lucky, they might be able to deflect a blaster or two... it would be like deputizing the postal service to fight a war for you, since they already work for the government and some do a lot of walking.

better than hiring mercenaries would be to find military leaders from the various republic worlds -- certainly some have strong military traditions that can be harnessed, and have them work hand-in-hand with the jedi.

 

No doubt man. He was on the council, pathetic. Same Saesee Tiin and Agen Kolar. Jedi Masters my aass.

 

the jedi agricorps - they might have some jedi training, but they're not an army. they probably don't have the experience in things like: weapons, demolitions, combat tactics, space combat, ship tactics, espionage... if they are lucky, they might be able to deflect a blaster or two... it would be like deputizing the postal service to fight a war for you, since they already work for the government and some do a lot of walking.

I think that they do have the training on most of the things you mentioned; they just weren´t never picked up by Masters as their Padawans. Of course, the abilities of the older ones would be rusty, but some of the Emperor´s Dark Jedi were former members of the Agricorps and probably not that much worse than some of the Jedi Knights themselves. And considering how much the Jedi whine about insufficient number of Jedis in the EU Clone Wars books etc, the Agricorps members probably could have helped to ease the strain on the regular Jedi somewhat.

And the fact that the clones have been trained to obey the Jedi is no reason for the Jedi to take command of them, really. It´s a "gift" that the Jedi could have said "no" to. Even in dire circumstances there are always choices.

And if forced to chose between having highly suspicious, highly dangerous soldiers with little free will and postmen, I would choose the postmen. They could be trained and trusted. And at least the guy who delivers my mail is a former soldier.

 

I've gotta play "devil's advocate" for Coleman Trebor for a second. Following the Battle of Geonosis, how many Jedi thought the quickest way to end the Clone Wars would be to kill (or otherwise take down) Dooku? Many, from my recollection. Trebor simply had the gumption to try to accomplish taking down Dooku first.... He failed, yes, but you can't blame him for trying.

 

Nor for goinf down under the guns of the galaxies then-greatest bounty hunter.

 

Wasn't Plo the best pilot in the Jedi Council, not taking into account Skywalker?

 

Not Koon, Tiin.

 

intent is one thing... but had Coleman lived to watch Episode III, he would have learned his error -- don't attack people who have the high ground.. you never know what surprises they can have.

Trebor's mistake was misjudging his enemy - he might be able to take on Dooku... but he should have sensed that there were dangerous enemies on the ledge besides Dooku.. like Jango, and that Dooku had no qualms about letting Jango fight for him.


Back to the Agricorps -- they might have some lightsaber training, but they're not going to have a lot of battle training.. normal jedi knights don't even have that much military training (which is the problem). youngling training consists more of basic force talents and philosophy and general schooling than turning them into soldiers or officers at a young age. i would imagine that younglings aren't taught too much combat partially because they know that so many will wash out, and they don't want half-trained washouts roaming the galaxy causing trouble for having enough skills to be dangerous but not enough to be competent. what they could have done is shifted a lot of the non-military jedi work over to the agricorps... like youngling training.

 

Ki-Adi-Mundi cant win the Darwin award anyway. He had children. Therefore his inferor genes were already in the gene pool. Its a shame really. Cone head could've won first prize.
But anyways, my Darwin award goes to Aayla "Let me look at the pretty birdie as my troops aim guns at me" Secura. Seriously, when you have the choice between not getting shot by your soldiers or watching a bird fly by, what do you do?

 

intent is one thing... but had Coleman lived to watch Episode III, he would have learned his error -- don't attack people who have the high ground.. you never know what surprises they can have.

maybe obiwan trained him in the art of "not worrying about the highground technique" he used on maul?

 

hehe.. true... perhaps it was after TPM when obi-wan realized that he should always be on guard when to use the higher ground to his advantage... cuz maul didn't.. and lost!

also, in TPM, Obi-wan knew that Maul was the only opponent on the high ground, whereas Trebor jumped into a situation with too many unknowns.

 

WHOA. I just realized that Aayla had an extremely Zen haiku death. Watching a bird fly away as your soldiers betray you.

Jeez.

I'm honestly moved by that image.


[but I'm with you on Conehead. I'm wracking my brain to try and figure out a way to nominate him for something legitimately Darwinian, on not just on the grounds of being generally pointy-headed and annoying.]

 

Me too. I've always liked her death scene (despite not liking the girl herself very much). Very tragic and poetic.