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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Beyond - Legends Evasion - NJO - Completed - April 29, 2003

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by InyriForge, Nov 17, 2002.

  1. InyriForge

    InyriForge Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2002
    Title: Evasion
    Genre: pretty much everything. Romance, commedy, action, angst, etc.
    Pairings: Jaina Solo/Jagged Fel, Wes Janson/Inyri Forge, Kyp/Cheriss, Hobbie/Xris(OC)
    Rating: PG-13 for alcohol abuse, kissing, and eventually violence and profanity. (I promise to keep it mostly clean).
    Disclaimer: Yet again, none of these wonderful characters are mine, they all belong to George Lucas, the Bantam Era authors, and the NJO authors.

    Evasion aka Inyri's Pathetic Attempt at a Full Length Fic

    The dream pushed her through dark corridors and rooms that were reminiscent of her childhood. Although it felt familiar, there was nothing distinctly recognizable; just fuzzy images of people and places she may have known at one time. It was more like she was walking through a haze. A very, very painful haze.

    Jaina Solo awoke with a start to a pounding headache. What happened last night? She closed her eyes and fought down the nauseous feeling in her stomach, trying to remember. They?d come back from a battle and had gone to a party with Rogue Squadron. That part was clear.

    And she remembered drinking a lot. Why was she drinking so much? Sure, she was Corellian, but something must have made her feel the need to get good and drunk. Jaina felt the nausea return as things from the previous night?s exploits began to resurface. Jagged Fel was the reason she was acting like an alcoholic. Well, what could she expect; she was a Solo. Jaina thought back over the night?s events and the memory of Jag leaving with a girl suddenly came to the front of her mind. Her nausea increased as she thought of what Jag and his girlfriend had most likely done upon returning to his room.

    Why did she even care? Jag could do whatever he wanted, with whomever he wanted. There was no reason why she should care what he did. After all, Jag was just a guy she flew with. He wasn?t even with the New Republic. He was overly obsessed with protocol and he was egotistical and he was arrogant and?he was the most incredible man she?d ever met. And he was in love with someone else.

    Jaina tried to shut out that memory, tried to think about what else had happened the previous night. Jag had left with the little tramp and she?d gone to the bar. She?d had a few shots, and then?Jaina sat up suddenly. She couldn?t have!

    Groaning, she fell back on the pillow. She had. She?d thrown herself at Kyp Durron and they?d left the party. Jaina began to hate herself as the previous nights events became clearer. She remembered making out with him in the hallway?something had stopped her. Jaina tried to remember. What had happened? She?d thought of Jag, thought about how Kyp would never be Jag, and at that moment, she?d known she wanted Jagged Fel or no one.

    Well, it looked like she had no one. Jaina felt the tears start to slip from her eyes. What was so wrong with her? Nobody wanted her. Anakin and Jacen were dead, her parents never had been there for her, and now, the man she cared for would rather be with someone else. Jaina buried her head in the pillow, letting the tears come and the sobs shake her body.



    ?So, how was everyone?s evening?? Face Loran sat down at the lunch table beside Wes Janson.

    ?Absolutely boring,? Wes complained.

    ?I did something so dumb,? Rogue Eight, a young girl of 23 with waist length auburn hair and bright blue eyes sat down with the rest of her squadron. ?And now I don?t know what to do.? She looked pleadingly at the older pilots seated at the table.

    Inyri Forge obliged. ?What happened, Andi? We?ll figure out how to fix it.?

    ?Last night I got so drunk that I couldn?t stand up. I was at the party we had with Twin Suns. This guy taps me on the shoulder and asks if I was all right. We talked a little bit, and then I said I felt sick, so he was walking me home, and, and I puked all over him.? Her face got red. ?He was so hot, too.?

    ?Oh, Andi, I?m so sorry.? Janson said, moving to hug the girl. ?But you do know that you
     
  2. jags_gurl

    jags_gurl Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    May 29, 2002
    lol! a food fight! [face_laugh] what a great beginning, Inyri! can't wait to read more! :D
     
  3. JediWarriorYoda

    JediWarriorYoda Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    That was great.... but you made her make out with Kyp.... egh! Trying not to make myself puke over that thought.... Ok, great post, can't wait for more. There will be more right?
     
  4. hawkbatcanuck

    hawkbatcanuck Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 24, 2002
    Congratulations on attempting your first full length story. By the looks of the first post, it's going to be a good one!

    I like the way you began with Jaina, her introspection as she gradually remembers the previous evening's events. It sets up expectations in the reader's mind.

    Then you counter with the "Animal House" (how apt!) food fight of the Rogues and Wraiths, giving us both humour, and setting us up for the fact that Jaina had gotten the wrong end of the stick the previous night.

    Many of my favourite characters appeared, and will soon be in trouble from Wedge, it seems.

    Pointedly, I gather, you didn't have the man everyone was talking or thinking about - Jag - in the post. That in itself is a cliffhanger, as we wonder who will he interact with first. Jaina, off on the wrong tangent? Andi, appologising? Kyp, who would know why Jaina stopped the night before in the hall? We'll have to be patient and wait for your next post.

    All in all, very enjoyable.

    Keep up the good work,

    hawkbat
     
  5. InyriForge

    InyriForge Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2002
    Jag's girl - I wasn't sure if I should save that until later, but i really needed to contrast from Jaina's dark mood. I'm glad you liked it.

    Sara - yeah, she did. I'm sorry, the thought repulses me too. However, Jaina has decided she wants nothing to do with Kyp romantically. Now, to cheer you up, there's A LOT more to the story. I have the first three posts, and most of the middle, written. The forth post is in the process of being finished up.

    Hawkbat - you grasped exactly what I was hoping to portray! *throws party* And within the next few posts, Jag gets the fun time of interacting with all of the above. ;) Now the only question is: Who will get to him first?

    I'm so glad you guys liked it! I'm getting a little more comfortable posting stuff, but I was quite the nervous little writer since this is my first major undertaking.

    ~Inyri
     
  6. starkrusher

    starkrusher Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 4, 2002
    What's this about wiating till 1:30 board time? I see that it is only 11! Yeah, well, I couldn't stay off the computer. So here I am to see the start of a wonderful Inyri fic. Beautiful! Beautiful. I truely don't think its slow or any of that other crap. You should change ur title to juat Evasion. Ur a wonderful writer, stop knocking yourself. Anyway, great first post!

    ~Mandie

    P.S. Church is in no way an hour long where I go. If ur estimating time I spend at church I would give my service a good 2 hours, then another half hour for travel. :D
     
  7. InyriForge

    InyriForge Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2002
    MANDIE!!!!!!!!!!

    UR BACK!!!!!!!!!

    I meant one thirty my time. I'm sorry. Thank you for reviewing it even though u already have!

    Yeah, my church is three blocks away and takes an hour. I sorta assume all church is that way. Sorry.

    ~Inyri
     
  8. AERYN_SUN

    AERYN_SUN Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 1, 2001
    food fight! i'm definitly gonna keep an eye on this one :D
     
  9. InyriForge

    InyriForge Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2002
    Thanks Aeryn. My crazy side keeps coming out more and more in fics. ;)

    ~Inyri
     
  10. The_Standmaiden

    The_Standmaiden Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 28, 2002
    Haha! I found this fic even without the link! :D

    ?Oh, Andi, I?m so sorry.? Janson said, moving to hug the girl. ?But you do know that you can puke on me anytime you want and I?ll still care for you.? He moved to kiss her cheek and was rewarded with a roll hitting him on the side of the head.
    [face_laugh] Janson's great!

    I really like the way you've captured the personalities of all our favourite pilots!

    EDIT: And I know I'm starting to sound like a broken record, but did you post in the sticky thread yet?
     
  11. starkrusher

    starkrusher Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 4, 2002
    what's a sticky thread?

    Glad to see you changed your subject line (sorta). On to 9.3 in Chem. :D

    ~Mandie
     
  12. The_Standmaiden

    The_Standmaiden Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 28, 2002
    starkrusher: The sticky threads I was referring to are the FanFiction Indices at the top of the screen in the FanFic Stories section of these boards. This fic, for example, would go in Beyond the Saga Index because it takes place after the movies. These threads help readers to find fics in genres that they like that are perhaps less popular than, say A/A or J/J, but these can go in there too.

    Sorry for the lecture. You probably already knew all that. [face_blush]
     
  13. starkrusher

    starkrusher Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 4, 2002
    Yep, that's what I figured you meant and yeah, I know what the indexes are, but thanks for explaining!

    ~Mandie
     
  14. The_Standmaiden

    The_Standmaiden Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 28, 2002
    I'm just a big campaigner for them because they've worked reasonably well for me!
     
  15. Rogue11JS

    Rogue11JS Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 27, 2002
    *EVIL GRIN*





    HEE HEE HEE


    I know what your up to this is great write more!
     
  16. Trickster_Jaina_Fel

    Trickster_Jaina_Fel Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 3, 2002
    great post Inyri! <applauds loudly> very well done...and it is NOT pathetic!

    :D can't wait for the next part! :D

    UP UP UP UP!

    ~TJF
     
  17. hawkbatcanuck

    hawkbatcanuck Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 24, 2002
    I hope that you are enjoying "your fame and fortune", as the reviews for your story come in.

    Are you planning to post updates a couple of times a week, or make us wait longer?

    still laughing,

    hawkbat
     
  18. Xaara

    Xaara Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 30, 2002
    Great beginning! I love the food fight--just like the Rogues/Wraiths. And hitting Wedge with a pie! *collapses into fit of giggles*

    Keep up the good work!
     
  19. starkrusher

    starkrusher Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 4, 2002
    the blueberries happened to be my favrorite part [face_laugh]

    ~Mandie
     
  20. JainaJediQueen

    JainaJediQueen Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 14, 2002
    Oh...That's such a great beginning!
    ~*~The Queen~*~
     
  21. hawkbatcanuck

    hawkbatcanuck Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 24, 2002
    Pulling you up by your bootstraps,

    hawkbat
     
  22. InyriForge

    InyriForge Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2002
    OMG, you guys, I am so sorry I haven't been here all afternoon! I was up really late last night and I had to get up early this morning, so I just crashed about three hours ago and only woke up a few minuts ago.

    Standmaiden - Thanks! Glad you liked Janson. He'll definately be back in future posts. (Like the next one, for example). I haven't gone to the sticky threads, because I have trouble posting links.

    Mandie - Subject line? I haven't changed anything there yet, so I'm kinda confused.

    Rogue11js - What I'm up to, huh? What do you think I'm up to, save hooking Jag and Jaina up? *thoughtful look*

    TJF - You're telling me not to call my fic pathetic? Hmmmm, this is coming from the girl who insults her writing skills with every post? :) :) Alrighty, I deserved what I got. Glad you enjoyed.

    hawkbat - I'm planning on posting the next part later this week. Mandie has it now, as well as post three, so all future posting depends on if she gets those back to me in time for the next post.

    Xaara - So glad you liked it. Expect more insanity in the future. (Although this is a J/J)

    Mandie - It was originally strawberry, but I thought blueberry would be funnier. :)

    JJQ - Thanks! *blushes*

    hawkbat - thanks for the up

    Again, guys, thanks so much for all the reading and reviewing!

    ~Inyri
     
  23. Trickster_Jaina_Fel

    Trickster_Jaina_Fel Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 3, 2002
    TJF - You're telling me not to call my fic pathetic? Hmmmm, this is coming from the girl who insults her writing skills with every post? Alrighty, I deserved what I got. Glad you enjoyed.

    :p but there's a difference, see I...shutting up now. ;)

    ~TJF
     
  24. InyriForge

    InyriForge Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2002
  25. The_Standmaiden

    The_Standmaiden Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 28, 2002
    TJF: You know that saying? The one about the pot and the kettle? ;)

    Inyri: I'll have you know that my parents think I am insane because of this fic. My mom was talking about blueberries to have on this cake thing, and I cracked up thinking of Wedge! [face_laugh]