Beyond - Legends Growing in the Force: A response to the Dear Diary Challenge [OC: Kavin Horn] completed 12/17

Author: Alexis_Wingstar
Title: Growing in the Force
Main Character: My OC, Kavin Horn from:[link=http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/25049238/p1/?9]The Ysalimir Effect[/link] and [link=http//boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=25098046&brd=10477&start=25113640]Breaking the Silence[/link]: But it begins several years before both stories.

Entry 1:

I celebrate my eleventh lifeday today.

I should be happy.

Master Jev accepted me as her padawan. All my life (yeah, I know I'm only 11, and that doesn't amount to much in the scheme of things) I have longed for this. I hope I didn't offend Master Jev by my lack of enthusiasm. I was flawlessly polite, of course, bowing to her and thanking her for the honor. But, I feel empty.

I should be happy.

I recieved a special gift from Miri; a soft green tunic with golden embroidery on the sleaves and neck which she made herself. It's very nice. Her note said she thought of my eyes when she picked out the material.

I should be very happy.

Maybe I will be once I find the pieces of my heart. Though I think one piece went up in flames with my mother's body during the ceremony honoring her departure into the embrace of the Force.

 

But I think one piece went up in flames during...

Yeah, it might have. That's terrible!

Great work!

 

I should be very happy.

Maybe I will be once I find the pieces of my heart. Though I think one piece went up in flames with my mother's body during the ceremony honoring her departure into the embrace of the Force.

but

 

Thank you.

When I was writing this, I was wondering if an 11-year-old boy would be so dramatic, then I thought of my 8-year-old. Unless he totally changes in the next three years, I would have to say that I didn't write it dramatically enough.

 

Entry 2:

Master Jev has been really supportive. She's so much like my mom! I'm not sure why, but, even though her presence is comforting, it's also a little painful. I guess I feel a little guitly thinking of Master Jev like I do my mother... like I'm betraying my mom. That's silly, I know.

One thing that happened today puzzles me. Jefri acted really cross with me for no reason, and made a snide remark so only I could hear when I left the training room. I'm not quite sure what his problem is. He's usually light-hearted and jokes around all the time. The past couple days he's been jeering me at every turn. I just don't get it! What did I do to him! I thought he was my friend.

 

I love your OC's reflections on feelings for both master and mother.

 

Thank you.

 

Entry 3:

I recieved a call from Miri today. When I spoke to her, the pain I feel about my mother's death seemed to go away, if only for those moments until we had to say goodbye. She is so beautiful! I'm going to marry her when we grow up.

 

Looking forward to more!

 

Entry 4:

I noticed something today that I think was there all along, but it just didn't click until now. I think Masters Jev and Phtam love each other. Not just a platonic friendship love, but really love each other. They were showing Jefri and I the two forms, shien and juyo. They practice dueled each other using those forms, and it looked as though they were dancing with each other. It wasn't just because they were both masters, either. I looked at them through the force, and there was a connection there much like my mom and dad's.

They aren't married, and I'm not saying they've been with each other, but, there is definitely something there. Why else would their touch linger when she helped him up after she successfully threw him.

They complement each other. I want that someday with Miri. It will happen. I know it.

 

Loved the update!

 

Entry 5:

Well, I'm ready to take the next step as a jedi! I am going to build my first lightsaber... no more using the training saber I recieved as a youngling. I finally gathered all the components I need, and I've perused the archives diligently on lightsaber blueprints.

I've been dreaming about this since the first day I held a training saber... before then, actually. Master Jev says I'm ready.

I know I'm ready.

Why am I so nervous?

 

I know I'm ready.

Why am I so nervous?

Because it's natural, even good for you!

 

Entry 6:

This is going to take much longer than I expected. I knew constructing a lightsaber would take time, but, I didn't expect it to be this... involved. I studied the blueprints from the archives, and it seemed not so difficult. I thought I'd be done by today, but, I see now it's going to take at least another few weeks! Master Jev said it's not unusual to take weeks or even months to construct a lightsaber.

Well, I guess that's not so bad. I want to do this right so it will be worth the time and effort.

Right now, I'm going to bed though. I haven't had much rest in the past week. I couldn't sleep because every time I closed my eyes, I kept seeing all the pieces of the lightsaber floating around me!

 

Right now, I'm going to bed though. I haven't had much rest in the past week. I couldn't sleep because every time I closed my eyes, I kept seeing all the pieces of the lightsaber floating around me!

That's what happens when you're worried about something!

 

Yeah, I've had my fair share of times where things floated around when I closed my eyes, and I'm not telekinetic.

~~~~

Entry 7:

Well, it's coming along nicely. I might just be through by the end of next week. Though I don't want to rush this: I want it to be perfect. I wonder if I can make it so the fit of the handle can be flexible. I'm still growing, after all, and my hands are going to get bigger. What's comfortable for me now probably won't be when I grow up. Oh, well, if I can't, then I'll have to make a new lightsaber in a few years... though I hate the thought of giving up something I've worked so hard on!

Ah, I have to stop thinking so much and worrying about something that hasn't happened yet. I need to concentrate on now; on constructing this lightsaber.

 

Ah, I have to stop thinking so much and worrying about something that hasn't happened yet. I need to concentrate on now; on constructing this lightsaber.

Very true. But sometimes that is easier said than done!

 

Amen to that!

~~~~~~~~~~~

Entry 8:

Well, I finished constructing my lightsaber! The blade is an unexpected shade. It's a strange combination of green and blue... teal or cyan I guess you'd call it. But, it is beautiful. Also, it doesn't just hum, it sings!

I'm going to go to the training room now to test it.

 

Glad to see an update.

 

Entry 9:

Wow, it's been awhile since I wrote. I intended to come back after I tested my lightsaber to append my last entry, but, I was interrupted by Master Jev. We had to leave quickly for a mission, and I just now got back.

The lightsaber works great! It can be used under water if I need to because I used two crystals. I was able to test out this feature during the mission. Master Jev had me practice a katra on a fallen tree that spanned a river. Well, I fell in, and my ankle got tangled in some underwater reeds and I used the lightsaber to free myself.

Of course, Jefri isn't impressed. While I tested it before I had to leave, he made sure to criticize every aspect of my lightsaber. He has no room to talk. He's still using the training lightsaber, and hasn't been chosen as a padawan by any master yet. Perhaps he's jealous. I wish he'd get over it. I miss the times when we could laugh together.

 

I miss the times when we could laugh together.

 

Thank you, VaderLVR64

~~~~~~~

Entry 10:

Master Jev and I had an important conversation today. After training real hard all day, she sensed something was bothering me. I didn't really want to say anything. After all, it I felt like I was just being too sensitive. But there's something about Master Jev that I feel I can talk to her about anything without worrying about being judged, so I opened up.

I told her about how Jefri was behaving and how it hurt. She reminded me of what I knew, but didn't really think about much: Jefri was an orphan, and looked to herself as a mother figure. That's when I realized Jefri was jealous... not because I was chosen as padawan and now had my own lightsaber, but because I was chosen by Master Jev.

Jefri still has Master Jev, but she spends more time with me now. Though it isn't my fault, I feel bad. I know how hard it is to lose a mother.

 

Jefri still has Master Jev, but she spends more time with me now. Though it isn't my fault, I feel bad. I know how hard it is to lose a mother.

Awww....

 

Entry 11:

I have to admit, I'm scared. My father is missing, and I can't sense him! He went on a mission with his padawan, Degal. I guess I should be concerned about Degal too, but, I'm not. He has always given me the creeps. He has a lot of anger in him, and he's beyond arrogant. I have a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. I don't even wish to write down what I believe may have happened, let alone voice my suspicions. Force, I hope I'm wrong!

 

Uh oh. This can't be good.

But a wonderful update.