Hall of NO SHAME! (Or: How I learned to stop worrying and love my bombs)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction and Writing Resource' started by DarthBreezy, Feb 18, 2007.

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  1. DarthBreezy

    DarthBreezy Force Ghost star 6

    Jun 4, 2002
    As usual, I get inspired by other discussions in hopes of turning around any negative things that arise.

    One of the things that really struck me was the fact that a lot of 'newer' writers fear that they will never 'measure up' - that they can't admit or even conceive that some of these awesome writers ever wrote... crap.

    SO, on that note, I dare you to dig up your first fic, your worse fic, and perform an Exorcism, and show these poor souls that there IS a light and a reward to hard work....


    THIS unvarnished horror (Complete with calling Obi-Wan 'Ob1' [face_sick]) was my first attempt at fan fiction... I'd like to think I've improved over the years...



    [link=]Return to Coruscant[/link]
  2. Jedi-Ant

    Jedi-Ant Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jan 3, 2007
    This is a really good idea, Breezy! [:D]

    It's true what you've said...I'm new (nearly two months old, actually), and I was terrified about my "crap work." (I'm not as terrified now, but it still worries me a little) :(

    So, thanks for this. I think this thread could really help!

  3. DarthBreezy

    DarthBreezy Force Ghost star 6

    Jun 4, 2002
    OH. Dear. God.

    I just looked over it again... It's... *hangs head in shame* - It even has AUTHOR NOTES MID FIC! - good Lord...


    But I'll leave it 'As found'... no revisionist history here. It is what it is, a learning experience and my very first attempt at even thinking about seriously writing... I tell you, I was so scared to post it I nearly threw up at the time [face_blush]

  4. rocketscientist

    rocketscientist Jedi Youngling star 3

    Nov 16, 2005
    You are a brave woman Breezy - still, it was pretty cute. :)
  5. obsessedwithSW

    obsessedwithSW Jedi Master star 4

    May 24, 2005
    Second that RS![face_laugh] I do appriciate the support!

    When I read the thread title It read like this-

    How I learned to stop worrying and love my boobs!:eek:

    So of course I had to look![face_laugh]
  6. rebel_cheese

    rebel_cheese Jedi Master star 4

    Jul 6, 2006
    This is my bomb, I think:

    I'm just not a romance writer . . . but it was a good try, I guess. It's far too melodramatic and has too much corny dialogue . . .

    Edit: here's my other bomb:

    It got popular but it was truly an unorganized, messed-up story that eventually got away from its point. I had to stop it before it truly became a monster, and it was originally written for the wrong reasons, to boot. I was having a resurgence of my depression problems when I began writing it, and it shows. I eventually recovered and spent the next several chapters trying to fix it and ended up making it all worse. It was becoming a mess, and finally I backed myself into a corner and could finally end it.

    I don't think I'll ever finish, or even try to rewrite it. But I love it anyway, if as a reminder of my mistakes.

    Edits: Man, I am just not satisfied with this thing am I?
  7. Jedi-Ant

    Jedi-Ant Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jan 3, 2007
    Breezy, it is cute!!! :)

    When I read the thread title It read like this-

    How I learned to stop worrying and love my boobs!

    Same here! I was like ... HUH?!? :p

    It just goes to show that I need to take more care in reading things instead of skimming them...
  8. obsessedwithSW

    obsessedwithSW Jedi Master star 4

    May 24, 2005
    Cheese I liked your I mean your bomb!:p
  9. Luna_Nightshade

    Luna_Nightshade Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jan 25, 2006
    I present for you, in all its glorious shame, the very first thing I ever posted on the fanfic boards.

    [link=]Luna's Shelf of Newbie Embarrassment[/link]

    Yes, indeed, somehow I managed to turn a vignette into a multi-part story. Some of the updates are seriously 3 paragraphs long, give or take. I rated the darn thing PG. What on earth is "introspective angst," anyway? I can't believe that was more than a year ago. I remember being so nervous to post it that I had to talk myself into it--I tried but chickened out at least 3 times in 3 days.


    At least it got me off the ground, I suppose.

    EDIT: What is more, I just discovered that I didn't reply to the last replies. Oh, dear. Um, thanks everyone--but I think I should let the bad boy just stay locked.
  10. oqidaun

    oqidaun Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jul 20, 2005
    My very first leap into fanfic wasn't in this fandom and isn't TOS friendly; however, the typos alone are enough to make anyone laugh. If you're keen, PM me for the linkage. :rolleyes: It's bad.

    Here's the first thing I posted here: [link=]Personal Space[/link]

    How was I to know folks weren't all that into Mas Amedda fic????
  11. furrylittlebantha

    furrylittlebantha Jedi Master star 3

    Dec 2, 2005
    We can't do offsite linkage, can we? That's where my bomb is., I actually deleted that story because it was so bad. I didn't want it affiliated with me. [face_sick] I can't post it here, can I? I feel a moral obligation to put the atrocity on display...[face_praying] *let her say no let her say no*
  12. Jedi Trace

    Jedi Trace SouthEast RSA star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Dec 15, 1999
    I?ll play!

    This was my very first fanfic: [link=]Stronger Than Night[/link]

    I'm still pretty fond of the story - it has that first-born place in my heart - but it has LOTS of boo boos: gratuitous plot devices (OMG - all those horrible "evil cliffies"), incorrect dialogue formatting, and cringe-inducing POV shifts. I could chalk it up to being posted back in the dark ages before we could edit posts, but nah ? it was written by a nOOb at her nOObliest. [face_peace]

    (I gotta admit that scrolling through was quite a trip down memory lane. @};- Back in those days, we couldn?t edit title lines to announce updates and sending PMs - did we even have PMs? - was unheard of, hence all the now-taboo upping. Oh, and there were no mark-ups such as bold or italics back then, nor did we respond to readers individually. And look at all the friends long gone. :( Amazing, how times have changed.)

  13. jmsbndgrl

    jmsbndgrl Jedi Master star 4

    Dec 31, 2004
    My first fic: [link=]More to Life[/link]

    Probably the cheesiest thing I have ever written. I like my happy endings, but this one was ridiculous. I actually had a spelling error that popped up in another fic and went back to my old stuff to check to make sure it didn't turn up on there and ended up rereading this nightmare. After I finished groaning in horror, I just laughed. [face_laugh]

    The plot was weak and probably should have ended 20 pages sooner than it did. Some of the dialogue was a bit forced because I was running out of things to talk about. I ended up writing myself into a hole that I barely got out of. Ever since then, all my fics get outlined before I start writing them. That outline might evolve over time, but at least I have a set direction from the start to prevent little gems like this one.

    However, no matter what I say about this one, I did have some brave souls who read it and some of them have been along for the ride on some of my other stories as well and we have become good friends. I also kept writing after this story, so it served the purpose of getting me on the boards. So it might have been bad, but in the end it served a greater purpose. :) However, it can stay locked and buried in the deep recesses of the boards for the rest of time. :p
  14. KrystalBlaze

    KrystalBlaze Jedi Master star 5

    Aug 3, 2002
    Love threads like this. :D I love glorifying my terrible fics - makes me feel happy.

    There are several vignettes and short stories I could pull up right now, but it all started with this:


    My first foray into on-line Star Wars fanfiction. It was popular and I still can't understand why. Good idea that was poorly executed.

    And Luna - haha! I thought the one you posted was decent! Lol.

  15. palpyisgod2

    palpyisgod2 Jedi Master star 2

    Aug 7, 2005
    well, I consider myself completely ueducated in the ways of fanfiction, but I try..does having a mother who has a Mastersin English count?

    my (2) masters have pretty much deserted me...(a pm/how are you would be nice every once in a while!) ;)

    BUT...if you're wondering where it all began, my first foray into SWFF was...

    to be read as soon as someone bumps the 'good' search thread in Resource...(BTW, it was called Unquestioning Loyalty, had no plot, plot holes, continuity errors and whent for a whole two pages)
  16. Healer_Leona

    Healer_Leona Squirrel Wrangler of Fun & Games star 9 Staff Member Manager

    Jul 7, 2000
    LOL I'm willing to show my noobness of old.

    [link=]An Ancient Lesson[/link]

    Look, it took nearly the whole page for me to put breaks between the paragraphs. Typos don't seem too terrible, which is a surprise. lol

    Those were the days for me of typing a post up right in the post box. I can't recall the number of times the UBB boards errored out when posting and I'd loose the post. Grrrr.
  17. lazykbys_left

    lazykbys_left Jedi Padawan star 4

    Feb 17, 2005
    [Neo] [link=]Whoa, deja vu.[/link] [/Neo]

    Sorry, just had to do it.

    The very first fan fiction story I wrote is no longer available on the Web, though I still have it in my hard drive. It committed the following crimes:

    Underage slash (well, just hugs and kisses)
    Over-exaggerated characterization
    Deliberate mischaracterization
    Not even a token nod to continuity
    Sex change
    Gratuitous angst
    Hints at slapstick comedy

    If anyone wants to read it, I'll send an email. But it's in Japanese, and I refuse to translate because . . . well, just because.

    - lazy

    Edit, edit, edit - cut, cut, cut. :p
  18. DARTH_MU

    DARTH_MU Jedi Master star 4

    Feb 9, 2005
    The M77 Saga

    Um, yeah

    It was supposed to be a story about Lady Genara, who is a Sith Lady... and um, she's like also Kyle Katarn's wife...
    Yeah, anyway, he doesn't know. And it was about Wraith Squadron Myn Donos and Lara Petothel, except Lara's kind of destroyed and Myn got a clone instead. Then it was about Mara calling Luke farmboy and stuff.


    Needless to say the story quickly got out of control. My control! and Mu Tryles's control.

    oh and the fic was so named because I imagined the Star Wars galaxy would be called M77. Go figure.
  19. rocketscientist

    rocketscientist Jedi Youngling star 3

    Nov 16, 2005
    [face_laugh] Uhm - actually I could use a thread like that too... oh sorry - too much information. :p

    My first ever fic was Prometheus Binding, which was WAY up it's own a - uhm ... well, anyway - I plead being traumatized by seeing HC burned to a cinder. PB ws my attempt to shed some of the angst I'd been hording over being made to fall for the anti-hero (talk about viewer manipulation) and then having a metaphorical bag stuck on his head so I never got to look at him again. *pout*

    Here's a link to the first chapter -

    I used to openly refer to it as the angstfest, I even had an imaginary angst-meter that would take the reading of each post. :p And as I look back at the first chapter I can see just a wee bit of 'telling' there... ;) Also my comma usage sucked and I wasn't totally down with dialogue punctuation.

    edit - typo queen!
  20. DarthBreezy

    DarthBreezy Force Ghost star 6

    Jun 4, 2002
    Have I told you how much I love you guys?


    I hope people will realize that in the end, we all started from somewhere, and that just because we don't shoot out of the gate with a fan fiction equivalent of a master piece means we are forever 'writer rocks'.
  21. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Mar 1, 2002
    This wasn't my first fanfic - that is on another site - and it isn't the first thing I put up here on this site but it's probably the one I dislike the most in terms of writing and needing a punchier ending. And earthisms. It was written originally as a screenplay.

    [link=] The bureaucrats are in charge[/link]

    Honestly, I like what I write. If I didn't, I wouldn't write it. That being said, there are lots of things on my computer that will never see the light of day!

  22. Layren

    Layren Jedi Master star 5

    Oct 28, 2003
    Okay Breezy, my very first fanfic isn't available anymore (thank the Force) But I have some fics from about three years ago that were absolutely cringe inducing.

    Here's a link to a collaboration I did way back in 2004.

    [link=] Silenced [/link]

    The premise of the fic was pretty good, but the execution needed a lot of help :p The sequel was even worse :p

    [link=] Silenced 2: Bonds of Friendship [/link]

    This was my first vignette -- it truly sucked :p

    [link=] For the Greater Good [/link]

    [link=] From Where I Am [/link] <------ My first romance vignette.

    Ugh, I can't believe I'm posting these :p So everyone improves :) No one starts out an excellent writer from day one, lots and lots of practice and a good beta is how every author improves :)

  23. rhonderoo

    rhonderoo Former Head Admin star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Aug 7, 2002
    I thought there was a thread on this just a bit ago. Thank goodness I'm not going nuts. :p

    And my very first fic is locked. Thanks be to all that is holy.
  24. rebel_cheese

    rebel_cheese Jedi Master star 4

    Jul 6, 2006
    Which bomb? :p
  25. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 5, 2004
    I'm trying to find the link. It was called the Birth of Hope and Light and it was TERRIBLE... Even the title was bad. :p

    I'll keep looking. But please...have mercy. I was just getting back into writing after a ten year hiatus. Not that almost continual writing for the past 3 years has helped any. [face_whistling]

    FOUND the link!
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