Saga I Am - Diary of a Clonetrooper (Updated 12/17/09 *Complete*)

Title: I Am
Author: Takianna
Timeframe: Post-AOTC, Clone Wars
Characters: OC Clones, General Skywalker, Commander Cody, General Kenobi
Genre: Drama
Notes: Response to the Dear Diary 2009 Challenge


Entry 1

Today, I am one of thousands. No millions. I have a number, but no name. That's not exactly true. I have a name, but most choose not to learn it. My brothers know it. They call me by it when we are alone. When we are alone in our helmets.

Inside our armor, we are cut off. The outside world is shielded from us. Noise is dampened. We can talk amongst ourselves and no one is the wiser. So why do I always feel so lonely?

I picked one of my brothers from the ground today. His armor was smeared with blood which was not his own. It was scorched in places and I knew he was dead. I carried his body back to the LAATI because I didn't want him to be left alone there one the ground of Geonosis. There were so many left behind. As we pulled into the air, I saw the white pieces of armor like snow upon a field. They littered almost every inch of the red ground. Left to be sandblasted by a planet where they took their last breath.

We serve. It doesn't mean we don't think.

 

Awesome start!! No better place then after a horrific first battle! Keep it up

 

Fine start, Takianna.

As we pulled into the air, I saw the white pieces of armor like snow upon a field.

This was a wonderful image. I also liked how your clone, whose name I hope we learn soon, did not want to leave his brother on Geonosis. Nice touch.

 

this is really good
pm me when you update

 

We serve. It doesn't mean we don't think.

Loved it! Please PM me when you update.

 

Really great start! It got me feeling for the clones. Nice imagery. Looking forward to part 2.

 

More clones.

Yay, I say!

As we pulled into the air, I saw the white pieces of armor like snow upon a field. They littered almost every inch of the red ground. Left to be sandblasted by a planet where they took their last breath.

We serve. It doesn't mean we don't think.

Poor boys. Nobody cars for them.
Now I want to know what he thinks.
Pm me when you update?

 

Very insightful.

Please PM me when you update!

 

It's great! I love it! Very emotional! Add me to the PM list please!

 

Entry 2

After Geonosis, I found myself being carted to one of many worlds where the Republic sought to end the Separatists movement. The name eludes me now. It seems all so long ago. All I know was that I was to fight. It's not that I enjoy blindly following orders. That's not what I do. I do what is requested of me. We all do it. As a group, clones are very loyal. We have been taught to be loyal to jedi. They command us.

I didn't think anything of following the generals. They are inexperienced though. Many have learned to rely on their closest clones commanders to help them with their tactics. Why wouldn't they? We are flash trained in almost all types of tactical situations. Our lives were lived under live fire conditions from the time we were "born" from a bottle.

Several of the jedi have taken to calling us by our names. It makes us feel more comfortable, but I'm not sure they deserve to call us these names. These are the names we earned ourselves. I don't mind them calling me my name when my helmet is off, but sometimes in the heat of fire, being called Echo can cause me to become distracted.

So now I'm aboard another ship on my way to yet another Outer Rim world to fight. I'm just not sure what I'm fighting for at the moment. Who is going to be better for this fighting, in the end? I know it won't be me.

 

So now I'm aboard another ship on my way to yet another Outer Rim world to fight. I'm just not sure what I'm fighting for at the moment. Who is going to be better for this fighting, in the end? I know it won't be me.

So sad, so true.

 

It's a wonder the Jedi at times seemed to look down on the clones for their less than pacifist nature, especially when they were basically two sides of the same coin...

 

During the war the Jedi seemed to also possess a "less than pacifist nature" as well.

Irony, sweet irony

 

awesome, awesome job. writing a clone is not easy. i've been trying to figure out how to do it for a while, and you've captured this absolutely perfectly.

the second entry was extremely poignant, the last paragraph especially. it's sad how true that no one was really the better off for all of the fighting save the "chancellor".

:snoopy

 

I didn't think anything of following the generals. They are inexperienced though. Many have learned to rely on their closest clones commanders to help them with their tactics. Why wouldn't they? We are flash trained in almost all types of tactical situations.

Too true. I think it was a stupid idea to make a group of people commanders who were never trained to do that kind of stuff. How can you expect a seasoned negotiator to suddenly know the ropes of warfare?
But that's Jedi for you.

It makes us feel more comfortable, but I'm not sure they deserve to call us these names.

If your name is all you have, it's certainly special.

Who is going to be better for this fighting, in the end? I know it won't be me.


Poor guys. They're doing the work and then they die. *sniff*

 

Amazing. You've captured the clone personality perfectally.

 

Thanks to everyone for the compliments. This is really a soul searching piece for me. Keeping reading!

 

Entry 3


My three other team members, my brothers, have now been killed. I find myself lost without them. Seb, who I will miss most, was the best. He knew when I was feeling worried about a planet fall or mission. He knew just what to say to kick my butt into gear. Now I don't know what I will do.

It seems I'm loosely associated with another group now, but can't find a place. They have known each other since birth (or whatever it was) and that is something which is really hard to enter into. I just don't always feel as though I belong with them. They have different slang for different things. It's a team thing. You start to call things by the same names when you are thrown into battle and fire together. I'm just not at ease in their presence.

Hopefully in the next few days I will be reassigned, possibly to forward command. It would be a nice assignment, although I would miss the fight. Forward command is usually where those of us who no longer have a team go. Once we've been in forward command for a couple of months, a new team is formed and we once again go back to the fight.

I'm nervous.

 

That's got to be very hard, to feel so alone after being such a part of a group!

 

It's hard to first lose you family and then be expected to simply integrate into another. Give adapting some time...

I am not sure I like the idea of forward command, it sounds dangerous. But if it's a way to get a team you feel comfortable with - go for it.

No need to be nervous.

 

Entry 4

I've been at forward command for almost four weeks now. There is another team which I will be joining today. They seem to be a pretty good group of guys. I'm not so sure about them though. I'm human, so I feel the same things everyone else does. It's hard to explain. E'Chin is the natural leader. He really knows his stuff and how to keep the team together. I'm sure I will grow to love them as I did my old brothers.

I still miss Seb. He would know how to make me feel better, if only he was here.

 

Poor guy... I can't imagine what its like to lose all your 'family'

 

I hope this guy gets past his missing Seb before he ends up distracting himself...

 

It's really hard to get over a missing battle buddy. Especially when they are perminantly missing like Seb. Believe me, I know.

 

I hope he really feels at home with the new guys. It must be terrible to be stuck with people you don't really like for ever, and stuck so close, too.