JCC Insomnia

I used to go to Florida on holiday with my parents and siblings so I've seen palmetto bugs. I'd want one of those Ghostbusters proton packs for one of them.

 

Back home now, doing slightly better. Although can't remember the last time I had a full 8 hours uninterrupted but definitely better

 

My sleep is all over the place. Try to go to bed around 11PM. Monday mornings are the worst. Wake up around 6 having panic attacks related to work.

 

I've read in the press that many people have reported weird or vivid dreams since the pandemic started.
I'm usually in bed by 9PM or so but the upstairs neighbor wakes me up around 630 AM. (Her grandson is working but can't do it from home so he normally leaves around 7 AMish).

 

Once again, I’m awake. Don’t have it in me to go to sleep right now.

Got off work about two hours ago.
Working on some fanfiction, thinking about current events, my social skills and how I’ve lapsed, and not driving a car.

Little things like that. Also reflecting on how I come across to the opposite sex. Something I’m extra cautious about is not coming off as flirty when I don’t mean to be. I’m not an intentionally flirty person by nature, and I don’t want anyone to get the wrong message, male or female.

I’d call myself an awkward extrovert.


I also feel like I’ve slacked off in terms of physical fitness as well as my conversation skills.

 

Everything I’ve said above still applies.

Though today I made sure not to lapse so badly in terms of conduct.
One of my older coworkers noticed my nervous tics, namely my trembling arms

When I’m around people talking and I’m shut out, it can be triggering. In this case, it was coworkers near my age. I can also be frustrated when customers and coworkers are talking and I don’t have a chance. Doesn’t help at all being in a crowded, busy environment which is also a trigger. In that case, I sometimes go into panic mode.

Sorry for rambling again. Just Ferus being Ferus.

 

Tried going to sleep. I really did. Put away screens and got under the covers.

Something else keeping me up.

Thursday is when classes for fall are open to register. There’s a class I absolutely need to take this semester, for both general ed and transferring. But the day classes open to register, I have a 5 am shift. Also, I have four days to decide how to fill my schedule based on whether I choose to keep my major or change it. Either way it will create a semester’s worth of overloading my schedule and my week.

 

Guess who’s back

Got the class situation worked out mostly.

The Avatar: The Last Airbender episode Nightmares and Daydreams is very relatable for me for a variety of reasons.

 

I'm not sure whether I should post in this thread, considering my current regular waking-up times are between 4AM and 5AM...

 

What time do you usually go to sleep out of curiosity?

 

Anywhere between 9PM and 1AM.

 

I’ve been hearing about how COVID rates are going up in my area and I’ve been wanting to see who’ll go with me to have a picnic/swim at the lake up north.
That is, who will drive since I still can’t. I’m past the minimum age, but life kept getting in the way.

 

I don’t know the double posting rules here but I’m down to talk about anything.

I always feel like an outcast on the boards, even in the friendly social threads I visit. I’m just venting randomly in a place I have no business doing so, so my apologies. Mosty new people in those threads are welcomed and I guess I am too but I guess I feel less liked for some reason and that people are slower to welcome me, I know that’s not totally fair I know I have people but I can’t help it. I’m not entirely my most rational self currently so apologies again

My default avatar used to be Dustin Henderson but now it’s this one I occasionally change it but it’s been going back to what is now I wonder if that turns people off. I am definitely a geek/nerd, probably of the Koothrappali flavor.

 

01:35
@Emperor Ferus
I don't know whether the mods allow it, but as far as I'm concerned double posting here is totally fine, considering that I doubt there will ever be much traffic in a thread like this and, more importantly, giving voice to our thoughts in a sort of incoherent way is very much in the spirit of the thread.

Today late night work, since I wasn't efficient during the day. I mean, I kind of was efficient, actually, but not on work-related stuff.

My sister has a new cat. She called him Gengis, from "Genghis Khan", because he looks very wild and belligerent. It's white and gray, and small enough that he could be easily carried in one hand.

 

Careful, her cat is going to pee all around the continent until it marks the border of the largest territory ever conquered by catkind.

 

Ferus again.


Sorry

 

Interesting.

Something like that happened this last year in one of my social threads.

I am a Generation Z male, and I am mushy and affectionate by nature, but I have no intentions of genuinely flirting with any user.

Thank you for the words of reassurance @Darth Punk

Hope your night is going okay

 

5:48
He's cheating
I think it's almost 11 where he lives. But he"s absolutely right in the merit of the post. There is no reason to feel rejected here. This is not a golf club.

 

Much appreciated my friends

 

3:25 a.m.

^lovely post, DP

I lurked the JCC for years silently* (not even "liking" things) and then lurked and liked for a few more years before I started to "get the courage" to start actually posting more myself. I know that probably sounds completely ridiculous to a lot of the oldbies around here, but I'm just a rather sensitive person and was afraid of getting my feelings hurt (even just by strangers on the internet). But I've been slowly able to come out of my shell here a little more bit by bit. I think the pandemics thread helped in a way, especially in March when the shock and anxiety of what was really unfolding globally was hitting everybody at the same time--I think that helped to make that feeling of being an accepted part of the "larger group camaraderie" easier to come by for those of us that were still fairly new around here (meaning the JCC, not the JCF in general).

*which is why I know all about "ApolloSmileGirl-gate" but seriously, yikes!...that must have been so unsettling to those that that person lied to/manipulated.

As for why I'm here in the insomnia thread now--woke up and started worrying about the fall semester. As ppl may known, the virus situation is getting worse and worse in FL (including in my own local area) and I'm very worried about having to return to in-person teaching in the fall (I'm a college professor). Right now the plan is for a return to "modified" in-person instruction (rotating smaller subsections of any given class in and out to maintain social distancing while having the other students either watching the in-person classes online and/or doing online modules in addition to their reduced in-person class time), but I am still scared to return to any form of in-person instruction, and faculty at my school are not allowed to teach their classes fully online unless they apply for accommodations through HR, which I don't qualify for. So yeah, insomnia

 

9:57AM.

Counts as insomnia because it's really 33:57AM for me this morning >_<

 

oh no @Lordban...does that mean you've been up for almost 34 straight?!?!

 

I can definitely relate to the sensitivity part and being afraid of reactions.

I'm sorry to hear about the virus situation, Pen.

I hope you and yours remain safe. I hope your mother is okay as well, you mentioned she lives far away.

Where I go to school, we're still having it entirely online as far as I know, but I understand how you feel. Sounds like a complicated system.

And that's really cool about you teaching college Pen
I want to be a teacher too though I'd probably teach even younger people.

Hope the night is treating you well (and anyone else on here right now)