Fun ITT we post random TV show quotes out of context

Ah, Major. Get everything settled with Quark?
That little toad is this far from doing a 360 out an airlock.
I'm glad to hear everything went okay.

 

It's insidious
Just like the Federation.

 

"Oh my me"

 

I suppose your gods aren't as cryptic as ours.
Our gods are dead. Ancient Klingon warriors slew them a millennia ago. They were more trouble than they were worth.

 

My philosophy is that there is room for all philosophies on this station.

 

Commander, did you threaten to throw this man by the collar out of an airlock?
Yes I did.
I'm shocked. Shocked and dismayed. I'd remind you that we are short on supplies here. We can't afford to take perfectly good clothing and throw it out into space! Always take the jacket off first, I've told you that before! Sorry, she meant to say stripped naked and thrown out an airlock. I apologize for any confusion this might have caused.

 

"If we're going to be damned, let's be damned for what we really are."

 

I don't see any points on your ears, boy, but you sound like a Vulcan.
No, sir. I'm an android.
Almost as bad.
I thought it was generally accepted, sir, that Vulcans are an advanced and most honourable race.
They are, they are. And damned annoying at times.

 

"You…You cruel, manipulative bastard. Is this all part of Your plan? It's all just a game to You, isn't it? Huh? Well, I know punishment, and he did not deserve that. He followed Your stupid rules and it still wasn't good enough! So what does it take to please You? Break Your rules, and you fall. Follow them, and you still lose! Doesn't matter whether you're a sinner! Doesn't matter whether you're a saint! Nobody can win, so what's the point? What's the bloody point?"

 

This is the story of a time long ago, a time of myth and legend, when the ancient gods were petty and cruel, and they plagued mankind with suffering. Only one man dared to challenge their power: Hercules!

Hercules possessed a strength the world had never seen, a strength surpassed only by the power of his heart. He journeyed the Earth, battling the minions of his wicked stepmother Hera, the all-powerful queen of the gods.

But wherever there was evil, whenever an innocent would suffer, there would be: Hercules!

 

If it isn't the hairless harpy.

If it isn't Skywalker's filthy obnoxious little pet.

 

They're very persistent creatures. When I was a child, I had one as a pet.
You had one of those?!
Domesticated. They're smaller - slightly.
How slightly?
You have Porthos.
Porthos doesn't try to eat me when I'm late with his dinner!
Vulcan children are never late with their sehlat's dinner.
I can believe that.

 

"Hey, Grandpa! What's for supper?"

 

Who are you?
Oh, hi. I'm Joey. My stupid friends are buying this house. Who are you?
I'm Mackenzie. My stupid parents are selling this house. I hate my parents.
I hate my friends. Look, there's gotta be a way that we can stop this from happening.
Like what?
Oh! Okay, you come with me and you tell them that the house is haunted.
What are you, 8?
Okay. Let's hear your great idea.
I don't have any great ideas. I am 8.

 

Joey doesn't share food!

 

Joey? Um ... you've had a lot of sex, right?
When, today? Some ... not a lot.

 

You see, we have six, ah... we have six, you see, and each one is a different level of intimacy and pleasure. So, you know, first you have one, and that's... nnyeahh.Then there's two, and by the time you get to five it's like...

 

What news of the foul Malmydons?
Scattered to the Nine Vectors, My Lord.
…and the Sheepsqueezers of Splatican Five? Have they been suckcreamed as a Qvarnbeast’s nobbo?
Well, they’re dead, if that’s what you mean.
Plus, Commander, did you vanquish the Nibblepibblies?
No, My Lord Pigmot, I did not vanquish the Nibblepibblies, because you just made them up.

 

They'll remember. It'll take some time and it won't be easy, but eventually people in this century will remember how to care.
But it makes you wonder, doesn't it? Are humans really any different than Cardassians or Romulans? If push comes to shove, if something disastrous happens to the Federation, if we are frightened enough, or desperate enough, how would we react? Would we stay true to our ideals or would we just stay up here, right back where we started?
I don't know. But as a Starfleet officer, it's my job to make sure we never have to find out.

 

I have no problem with following any rules you lay down, short of compromising your safety.

 

"There! The Satellite of Love is completely unsafe."

 

Captain, these are safe tribbles.
There's no such thing as a safe tribble.

 

You’re taller, you have the high ground. That’s how Obi-Wan beat Anakin.

 

So, you're the Commander of Deep Space Nine, and the Emissary to the Prophets, decorated combat officer, widower, father, mentor, and, oh yes, the man who started the war with the Dominion. Somehow I thought you'd be taller.

 

I like your new legs. They make you look taller.