Beyond - Legends Jedi Adept: Greater Than the Sum of Their Parts *** Complete *** THANKS EVERYONE!!!!

Evil, mean, cruel author! You got my hopes up sooo far when you gave us a living, speaking Nelani! Mean, mean Kidan! *sigh*

This is an excellent ending to a fascinating story. If I don't comment on the next one within a week, please send me a PM just to let me know it is up?

EDIT: I'm sooooo glad that Luke is finally feeling some attack of conscience! LOL. I can't believe he had the audacity to imply that perhaps Tahiri and Noelani might be seperated, though! I'd like to see Mara's reaction to that! WIll the next arc have more Mara/Luke POVs?

 

I thought Nelani was already dead. Then you make me all happy by reviving her. Then you kill her again. That was very down-up-down emotionally.

Good ending to this story. I hope that Tahiri and Noelani aren't seperated anytime soon. I too hope there'll be more Mara/Luke POVs in the next fic.

I'd like a PM for the next story please.

 

Jade_eyes
Marvelous!!!!
Thanks!

Yeppers, I want a PM when the next part starts.
will do!

As the saying goes, mysteriouser and mysteriouser.
just slightly...




Lola64
A great end to this installment.
thanks!!

You do know that you don't always have to kill them right? I mean, what did Nelani do to you to send her back to the Force. I'm sure you thought it necessary for the story line but I ask you, couldn't you have just put her in a coma or something?
yeah..i know...but Nelani was dead anyways...

I knew she wasn't going to get the rest of the word Jacen out. That would have made it too easy and you do like to torture your readers.
heh.....yeah.....it would've been too easy...

And why did they wait two weeks to get back to the asteroid? They'd have to know after Tahiri's escape whoever would high tail it out of there.

Sometimes I wonder about that Luke Skywalker.
Well Luke was kind of busy with the stuff going on in Bloodlines...so...

*shivers* If they only did.
aye....

I just love this story and am eagely looking for the next part. Please please please please please, add me to the pm list.
Thanks!! and I'd be happy to pm you when it starts...




voxynking
wow. what I great way to end this story. I would love a PM when the second one comes out.
Thanks!!! And will do!




Alishu06
great ending! Shame on Luke... lol I can't wat to read the next fic. Please add me to your pm list
thanks!! and the next one should start in the next few weeks....and will do!




Flowerlady
Awesome job, Kidan...
thanks!

And you bet I want a PM....
will do!





G__Anakin
Great Story and thanks for all the PMs!! Please PM me when you start the sequel
Thanks! My pleasure, and will do!





DARTH_MU
so basically Nelani wasn't really dead until you killed her... (I suggest you read my sig).
basically...

And what was the bacta machine trying to do to Nelani before it got destroyed? Save Nelani? Turn her into a mutant?
others? ???
it's an old idea from some Bantam-era EU. What it does is heals her (the bacta) and then electrocutes her to near-death again...





Healer_Leona
Awwww, poor Nelani. I second the question of what was happening with the bacta tank and Nelani.
aye...poor Nelani...see above for the answer....

A most satisfying ending of this chapter. I'd be very happy to be PM'd when you strat posting the part.
Thanks!! and will do!




Zonoma
Evil, mean, cruel author! You got my hopes up sooo far when you gave us a living, speaking Nelani! Mean, mean Kidan! *sigh*
did I ever lead any of ya'll to believe that I wasn't evil mean or cruel?

This is an excellent ending to a fascinating story. If I don't comment on the next one within a week, please send me a PM just to let me know it is up?
will do!

EDIT: I'm sooooo glad that Luke is finally feeling some attack of conscience! LOL. I can't believe he had the audacity to imply that perhaps Tahiri and Noelani might be seperated, though! I'd like to see Mara's reaction to that! WIll the next arc have more Mara/Luke POVs?
well...the longer the two of them are togeth

 

I would love a PM when you start the next story!
Great job.

 

star_writer24
I would love a PM when you start the next story!
will do!

Great job.
Thanks!

 

Great ending. Certainly didn't tie up any loose ends, but hey - that's was sequals are for!

Nice touch on Nelani and with the disappearing Fortress. I also liked that it was Luke, Corran and Kyle that went to check it out. Talk about a kick-butt team!

Yes, yes. Please PM me when the next one starts! I can't wait for more!

Telanna

 

Tahiri frowns slightly. ?I feel perfectly fine teaching my apprentice. And frankly, in that scenario, I thought about rescuing her. After all, you were the one who told me that I was responsible for her.?

She sees the frown which flickers across Luke?s face and wonders about it for a moment, but then the Grand Master is speaking again. ?I?m just wondering if we might have been a bit?reckless in assigning one-on-one apprentices again.?

silly Luke *is angry with him*

If they had turned away at that moment in time, then they would have found part of what they were looking for. They would have seen the ghostly form of a human female, one sheathed in a dull silver suit of armor.


*echos* most capable, powerful members





I?m looking forward to the next part of this
Would you mind dropping a pm when you start posting?


Cheers

~ Mags ~

 

TelannaTani
Great ending. Certainly didn't tie up any loose ends, but hey - that's was sequals are for!
Thanks!! and the story served the purpose of getting Luke the knowledge of what happened to Nelani, introducing Noelani...luckily that didn't necessarily mean I needed to finalize those few loose ends....

Nice touch on Nelani and with the disappearing Fortress. I also liked that it was Luke, Corran and Kyle that went to check it out. Talk about a kick-butt team!
yeah! Luke, Corran & Kyle definitely are a kick-butt team....

Yes, yes. Please PM me when the next one starts! I can't wait for more!
it'll be my pleasure!




Maggy
silly Luke *is angry with him*
yeah....he's a tad silly...


*echos* most capable, powerful members



well they are that...though they don't often display that ability...

I?m looking forward to the next part of this
Would you mind dropping a pm when you start posting?
Glad you're looking forward to it....and It'll be a pleasure to drop you a pm when I start posting

 

What anime did you take your NEW cover art from? I don't recognize it from anywhere . . . although something tells me I should be . . .

 

It's called Futakoi Alternative. I've not actually seen this anime, but discovered the links to it while doing a search for information about a different one - and that information led me to search for images from it. Which led me to this image.

 

[Black Screen]

A Legacy From the Past

[FADE IN FROM BLACK]

Han got a two-handed grip on the handle, as one might a staff, so that the blade would point straight down. Activating it, he raised it over his head, and then drove it down, almost vertically into the flattened area of the fallen limb. The tip of the energy blade struck the hardwood and began to burn through, producing a rich, fragrant smoke.

And when it had burned a hole deep enough to bury four or so centimeters of the pommel itself, Han switched it off, so that the handle stuck fast in the limb. Luke stepped forward. "Should the need ever arise, it can be withdrawn by someone as virtuous as yourself, Chewbacca."

[FADE OUT TO BLACK]

An Unknown Daughter

[FADE IN FROM BLACK]

A thirteen year old girl stands in the middle of the Skorch Fields. Her face is uplifted towards the sun, and with her eyes closed she just stands there basking in the peace. The wind blows through the field, whipping her long blonde hair around her.

Sitting on the bench at the side of the field is another blonde. This one is older, barefoot and has three vertical scars on her forehead. She watches the younger blonde through narrow green eyes, deciding if she should train her or not.

[FADE OUT TO BLACK]

A Plot to Further the War

[FADE IN FROM BLACK]

Cere Hollista leans back in her chair slightly, watching the man seated across from her. His dark brown hair is parted impeccably, and his tunic is cut along the current fashion lines out from Coruscant. Intelligent brown eyes are settled deep into his face, an aristocratic nose hangs over the thin lines of his lips almost like a beak. One side of his lips is curled slightly into a small half-smile, as if he is aware of some secret of the universe which Cere can never be privy to. His name is Jerod Pollit, and he is a high ranking officer in the Corellian government here to negotiate a treaty with BioTech Industries.

[FADE OUT TO BLACK]

The Need Has Risen

[FADE IN FROM BLACK]

She twists her arms slightly, one hand slipping under the sleeve of the other arm. A moment later she pulls out the collapsed staff. It's a simple weapon, compressed flow-metal, the same technology used in Tendandro battle droids for their self-healing armor, extends from the length of a lightsaber to just over a meter and a half long - equal extension from both ends. Noelani raises the staff, positioning it as close to the warrior's face as possible, and then depresses the small button to extend it.

The weapon extends into the warrior's eye and he bellows in rage, dropping Noelani. Without hesitating she twists the staff around and slams it against the side of his head. He crumples to the ground bleeding profusely from where she had struck him.

--------------------------

Noelani is falling through the trees. She slams into a branch, her abused body screaming in pain. Something heavy lands on the same branch, causing it to sway from the sudden increase in weight. Just enough movement to start her sliding again, she begins slipping off, and she rolls over casting her arms wide. Her hand clasps around a pommel of metal, halting her slide for a moment, until the pipe seems to work itself loose. A new voice seems to whisper in her head, a calming voice, telling her to center herself, to not panic. To reach out with the Force.

She opens her eyes, and looks down at the abyss of darkness beneath her, suddenly afraid.

-----------------------------

Noelani steels herself, pushing back her shoulders and meeting the warriors gaze head on. Rulmon Yah glances at Drago, his sneer growing wider. "I think I might be able to buy your daughter a bit more time, Infidel scum."

Drago moves so fast that Noelani is unable to track him. One moment he is behind the counter and the next he is up and over it, his claws extended and slicing at the vonduun crab armor which the warrior wears

 

wow

looking really forward to this

you have a date when you start already?

 

Maggy
wow
thanks!!

looking really forward to this


you have a date when you start already?
got a chapter or 2 to write still, so a week or two.

 

I can't wait...

Wonderful trailer.


FL

 

Flowerlady
I can't wait...
soon....

Wonderful trailer.
Thanks!!!

 

You've been busy! Loved the ending of this fic. That was completely unexpected, how Noelani turned the amphistaff into a Tusken weapon, and it explained the chapter much earlier where Noelani and Tahiri were bonding over training with the same implements. Terrific action scenes!

Luke has to come clean with what he did, not only to Tahiri and to Noelani but to himself. You cannot expect loyalty from people when your relationship with them is based on a lie. That's where logic like Jacen's can thrive.

Great job! Looking forward to reading the next part.

 

divapilot
You've been busy! Loved the ending of this fic. That was completely unexpected, how Noelani turned the amphistaff into a Tusken weapon, and it explained the chapter much earlier where Noelani and Tahiri were bonding over training with the same implements. Terrific action scenes!
Aye...I've been a bit busy. Glad you enjoyed the 'fic - and yeah, I wanted her to use an amphistaff as a gaffi stick from the start. Glad that having them do the training with them made it that much more reasonable thanks!

Luke has to come clean with what he did, not only to Tahiri and to Noelani but to himself. You cannot expect loyalty from people when your relationship with them is based on a lie. That's where logic like Jacen's can thrive.
Aye! He does need to come clean.....but there's no guarantees....

Great job! Looking forward to reading the next part.
Thanks!!!!!! A week or two for the next post!

 

Ooh - the trailer looks cool.

Finally here is my review - sorry it took so long to get back on-line!!!

Lovely story, and I really liked the idea of having Tahiri unwittingly matched up with her daughter. Clever use of Ikrit?s ?Greater than the sum of their parts? prediction relating to Noelani who is the embodiment of it in the sense that she is more powerful than either Anakin or Tahiri were/are singly. I especially liked the bit where she heard Anakin?s voice. I?m hoping that you will develop this to the point where she realizes who the voice belongs to. Interesting use also of Anakin?s vision of the Dark Jedi/Vong.

I?m not liking Luke at all ? no surprise. First I despise how he deprived Tahiri of her child ? who does he think he is to come between a mother and her baby like that? How dare he assume he has the right to make such decisions. Although this IS the man who advised Leia to have her children separated from her when they were babies. Jedi Master he may be, but he doesn?t know a thing about child-rearing, in fact IMO he?s a bit screwed up. I wish Mara had taken him out completely. LOL

I?m also a bit annoyed at those med droids for making poor Tahiri give birth on her back ? do they not know that is the WORST position to give birth in! A young healthy girl like that should have been encouraged to do the squat thing ? much more comfortable and believe me much easier and less painful. Or were the druids advised in what to do by Luke to make Tahiri suffer more?

The friendship that has developed between Tahiri and her daughter is just wonderful and makes me feel both happy and wistful, in a nice way of course. I loved that way Han treated Tahiri, and I also enjoyed Leia standing up to Luke. You go, girl!

I loved the idea of Tahiri teaching Noelani to fight Tusken style ? and it was very Anakin-ish of her to apply the technique to the amphistaves. I can just imagine him doing something like that. Noelani has no doubt inherited his creative problem-solving ability.

Very enjoyable writing, Kidan. I?m thinking the name Noelani has a special meaning ? something along the lines of relating to Noel (in Old English = Xmas Day, tidings, carols) and Anakin (Ani)? It has suggestions of gladness and goodness about it anyway.

PM me when you start the sequel.

 

Tahi
Ooh - the trailer looks cool.
Thanks!!

Finally here is my review - sorry it took so long to get back on-line!!!
that's not a problem...

Lovely story, and I really liked the idea of having Tahiri unwittingly matched up with her daughter. Clever use of Ikrit?s ?Greater than the sum of their parts? prediction relating to Noelani who is the embodiment of it in the sense that she is more powerful than either Anakin or Tahiri were/are singly. I especially liked the bit where she heard Anakin?s voice. I?m hoping that you will develop this to the point where she realizes who the voice belongs to. Interesting use also of Anakin?s vision of the Dark Jedi/Vong.
aye...it's a fun concept to play around with...*grumbles about DR killing off all the promising characters* and I'd hoped that Noelani would come over as a mixture of both of her parents....as for when she'll find out just whose kid she is...well....one day...maybe...

I?m not liking Luke at all ? no surprise. First I despise how he deprived Tahiri of her child ? who does he think he is to come between a mother and her baby like that? How dare he assume he has the right to make such decisions. Although this IS the man who advised Leia to have her children separated from her when they were babies. Jedi Master he may be, but he doesn?t know a thing about child-rearing, in fact IMO he?s a bit screwed up. I wish Mara had taken him out completely. LOL
Nope..not a surprise...truthfully Luke's been a bit off since DR got the license *shrugs* and it made sense with how the character was acting in the NJO-arc - and explains his actions in such things as DN3 in regards to Tahiri...

I?m also a bit annoyed at those med droids for making poor Tahiri give birth on her back ? do they not know that is the WORST position to give birth in! A young healthy girl like that should have been encouraged to do the squat thing ? much more comfortable and believe me much easier and less painful. Or were the druids advised in what to do by Luke to make Tahiri suffer more?
uhm...well...err....it's.....ahh...they're not designed for human births...yeah, that's it...so the technology is there for whatever species they were designed for instead.....yeah...that's a good excuse....

*author takes the time to point out that he's male, and both his sons were born by c-section*

The friendship that has developed between Tahiri and her daughter is just wonderful and makes me feel both happy and wistful, in a nice way of course. I loved that way Han treated Tahiri, and I also enjoyed Leia standing up to Luke. You go, girl!
Well, we saw in late NJO and DN3 that Han/Leia treat Tahiri like a daughter....I don't think that would change....

I loved the idea of Tahiri teaching Noelani to fight Tusken style ? and it was very Anakin-ish of her to apply the technique to the amphistaves. I can just imagine him doing something like that. Noelani has no doubt inherited his creative problem-solving ability.
well, it would have been the first fighting style that Tahiri learned. Gaffi sticks being such an important aspect of Tusken culture an all...and yeah, I wanted it to show through that Noelani has inherited his creative problem-solving ability...

Very enjoyable writing, Kidan. I?m thinking the name Noelani has a special meaning ? something along the lines of relating to Noel (in Old English = Xmas Day, tidings, carols) and Anakin (Ani)? It has suggestions of gladness and goodness about it anyway.
Thanks!!! That means a lot! And the name Noelani is actually Hawaiian, and means Heaven's Tears or Heaven's Mist....In a previous viggie (found here) which is the underlying basis for the concept of this

 

the sequel is up here:

http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=25962380

 

I really should have finished this, or at least kept up, but looking at the posting dates?I know there was no way!

So here, as this fic deserves, I?m giving you the closest I can come to a ?preggers style review? as I can in the limited, though not as limited as a couple of months ago, time that I have.

Prologue
This is heartbreaking. And while I?m here, I?m confused. Was this the start of another one of your stories? Or is it similar to another story? I think that contributed to my not following because I thought I had read it already or something. Anyway, clearly this is better, because I did remember to come back here and the other story is a vague recollection instead of an actual memory.

Anyway, It made me wince with what memories of my daughter?s birth that were not lost to time. I?m still damning those stupid Cedars Sinai OB nurses who turned off my epidural right when I started pushing. An hour later, I blacked out when her head crowned. It was that painful.

My son was born at St. John?s, and they?re very liberal with their anesthesia. It was a breeze having my son, I was ?happy? and in absolutely no pain. In fact, I was on the phone chatting with my girlfriend when the nurse told me to give a practice push and he almost popped out.

So?yeah, being 15 and alone and having a baby that no one knew about and whose father had died days after the conception, and no epidural?bummer for Tahiri.

But the even bigger bummer, of course?is Luke?s ?help?.

Man, even in fanfic this girls gets jacked by the Order, the Order that took her away from everything she had ever known and loved and then dogged her every chance it got.

I?d also like to point out, and I?ve always wondered if Denning didn?t think of this; The Exquisite Death is such an apt name for the ship upon which Anakin and Tahiri?s daughter was conceived, considering the origin of the word origami.

That?s right, I said origami, the Japanese art of paper folding.

Did you ever see that episode of ER where the doomed, as in; about to die, young man/boy falls for Susan Lewis, a powerful older woman?

I caught a couple of responses as I was scrolling down the thread pages and saw Maggy?s (I think it was Maggy?s) reference to the baby maybe being Luke?s and that he was wiping Tahiri?s memory to cover it all up and I had to laugh. Cleary she has spent too much time with Thrawn McEwok.

And finally, this was beautifully written, the word lyrical comes to mind because when the words flow one after another in an easy way. And they were good words, that may sound silly, but I?m always caught by word play and vocabulary and alliteration.



Chapter 1
Let me start off by saying that I love how this ties into LotF. I?m hoping you plan on doing one story for the series that chronicles Tahiri and runs parallel to the books. I really wanted to do that, but a Jahiri, do the missing scenes from each book that would have taken place between Jacen and Tahiri. But, you know?I can?t really write two at once and I have to finish Fear and Love before the kids go to college.

I really love that Luke?s on screw up has brought Tahiri and the child he stole from her back together. Hah!

If the Force didn?t want Tahiri to get pregnant?the Force would have invented birth control and told all the little Jedi?s about it.

Back to ER for a second?have you ever thought it was strange that a bunch of doctors, people who, in theory, know how human reproduction works, can?t figure out birth control? There hasn?t been a single pregnancy on that show in 12 years that was planned.

Oh?except the lesbian couple.

But still:
Mark and Jen
Doug and Carol
Benton and Carla
Deb Chen and a dude
Mark and Elizabeth
Susan and Cosmo?s father
Abby and Luka (which I called ages before it happened, as Jade 51999)

Anyway?the Jedi haven?t been quite as bad as the doctors?but c?mon on. I don?t think most of them were planned either.

But back to your fic:

I love that Tahiri picked her own daughter, although it would be funny

 

pregnantpadme
I really should have finished this, or at least kept up, but looking at the posting dates?I know there was no way!
aye.. you were a bit busy that time...

So here, as this fic deserves, I?m giving you the closest I can come to a ?preggers style review? as I can in the limited, though not as limited as a couple of months ago, time that I have.


Prologue
This is heartbreaking. And while I?m here, I?m confused. Was this the start of another one of your stories? Or is it similar to another story? I think that contributed to my not following because I thought I had read it already or something. Anyway, clearly this is better, because I did remember to come back here and the other story is a vague recollection instead of an actual memory.
Thanks, and yeah, this idea I used as a viggie a few around april of 06. The idea had a lot of potential, and a few weeks later this idea presented itself, so I ran with it..

Anyway, It made me wince with what memories of my daughter?s birth that were not lost to time. I?m still damning those stupid Cedars Sinai OB nurses who turned off my epidural right when I started pushing. An hour later, I blacked out when her head crowned. It was that painful.
ick - My wife had c-sectiosn for both of my boys....

My son was born at St. John?s, and they?re very liberal with their anesthesia. It was a breeze having my son, I was ?happy? and in absolutely no pain. In fact, I was on the phone chatting with my girlfriend when the nurse told me to give a practice push and he almost popped out.


So?yeah, being 15 and alone and having a baby that no one knew about and whose father had died days after the conception, and no epidural?bummer for Tahiri.
*nods* aye, it is something of a bummer...

But the even bigger bummer, of course?is Luke?s ?help?.
without a doubt!

Man, even in fanfic this girls gets jacked by the Order, the Order that took her away from everything she had ever known and loved and then dogged her every chance it got.
ayup..

I?d also like to point out, and I?ve always wondered if Denning didn?t think of this; The Exquisite Death is such an apt name for the ship upon which Anakin and Tahiri?s daughter was conceived, considering the origin of the word origami.

That?s right, I said origami, the Japanese art of paper folding.
... okay, I'm not up on the epistomology of the word origami so....that needs a bit of explaining...

Did you ever see that episode of ER where the doomed, as in; about to die, young man/boy falls for Susan Lewis, a powerful older woman?
nope

I caught a couple of responses as I was scrolling down the thread pages and saw Maggy?s (I think it was Maggy?s) reference to the baby maybe being Luke?s and that he was wiping Tahiri?s memory to cover it all up and I had to laugh. Cleary she has spent too much time with Thrawn McEwok.
amusingly enougj, Thrawn had the same idea, he just expressed it to me via PM

And finally, this was beautifully written, the word lyrical comes to mind because when the words flow one after another in an easy way. And they were good words, that may sound silly, but I?m always caught by word play and vocabulary and alliteration.
thanks! glad it worked so well!



Chapter 1
Let me start off by saying that I love how this ties into LotF. I?m hoping you plan on doing one story for the series that chronicles Tahiri and runs parallel to the books. I really wanted to do that, but a Jahiri, do the missing scenes from each book that would have taken place between Jacen and Tahiri. But, you know?I can?t really write two at once and I have to finish Fear and