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Story [Joker] In Sane: Well I think it's funny/ Dear Diary 2009 Challenge/ Updated 3-8

Discussion in 'Non Star Wars Fan Fiction' started by The Great No One, Jan 12, 2009.

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  1. The Great No One

    The Great No One Jedi Grand Master star 8

    Registered:
    Jun 4, 2005
    Title: In Sane: Well I think it's funny
    Author: Trimaj
    Characters: Joker
    Summary: The Joker's in Arkham. Again. They have requested that he keep a journal, and so the Joker decides to write two. This is his hidden one.
    Other:Thanks go to Bob Kane for creating this amazing universe and the resulting cast of characters that are in it. This is not my universe, I'm just privaledged enough to be allowed to play in it. Additional thinks go to my betas, DaenaBenJen, Qui-Gon_Reborn and Chuckles38. The name is thanks to QGR and Chuckles as well, as each gave me a part of it. Enjoy

    Note: The red text is voices not being written down in the journal.






    Entry 1

    Stymied. Stymied again, and of course it was that stupid Bat-dork.

    [color=crimson][I] Nothing new there. Doesn?t he like a good joke?[/I][/color]

    Obviously not. I didn?t think anyone cared about the weatherman.

    [color=crimson][I]They?re like lawyers, only good for being the punch line.[/I][/color]

    Or having one given to them. Right in the breadbasket. And this one sure had it coming after that mess with calling for a sunny 75 and giving us snow.

    [color=crimson][I]Jerk.[/I][/color]

    I went out in my bathing suit and whoosh, nearly froze my? well, that?s really unimportant.

    [color=crimson][I]C?mon! We wanna know.[/I][/color]

    It?s a bit personal. Besides you were there.

    [color=crimson][I]So? We don?t feel anything. Or even really see for that matter.[/I][/color]

    Then how, precisely, did you tell me about that dumb jerk who tried to knife me?

    [color=crimson][I]Dumb luck?[/I][/color]

    [I]You[/I] are a bunch of liars.[face_plain]

    [face_angel]

    Bah! What matters is it?s always the weatherman?s fault.

    [color=crimson][I]Of course it was.[/I][/color]

    [face_frustrated][face_rolling_eyes]

    [color=crimson][I]On with the story![/I][/color]

    My aren?t we bossy.

    [color=crimson][I]That?s our job. Now story![/I][/color]

    Alright already! Where was I?

    [color=crimson][I]You had nearly frozen yo-[/I][/color]

    Right, right! So I decided to play a little game with him, but NOOOOOO, everyone had to raise a hullabaloo just because he has some kids or something. This was supposed to be a private affair to boot.

    [color=crimson][I]Private? You didn?t want us?[/I][/color]

    Can I actually get rid of you?

    [color=crimson][I]You can certainly fail.[/I][/color]

    No trying? How utterly typical.

    [face_grin]

    Nincompoop.

    [face_laugh]

    ?

    I kidnapped and got the weather fool into seclusion, obviously the best place for them.

    [color=crimson][I]They can?t make the weather from there.[/I][/color]

    You?re telling me.

    [color=crimson][I]The game?[/I][/color]

    Oh yes. I told him that every time he guessed the right weather for the day he?d be get to watch TV. If he got it wrong, well a finger?s a small price to pay isn?t it?

    [color=crimson][I] You have duplicates of each one, so it shouldn?t be too big of a problem. [/I][/color]

    Yep, poor guy. He couldn?t get a single day right. Is it too much to ask for the EXACT temperature at a given minute? Or exactly how much it?s going to rain?

    [color=crimson][I]Not in the least.[/I][/color]

    Thank you. Sadly, his fingers came off too fast. So fast that we ended up going to toes. He didn?t seem to want to win, for some strange reason.

    [color=crimson][I]The loss of his powers must have been too much. Did you enjoy the game?[/I][/color]

    Indeed. So much I decided that it was time to get more contestants for my little game.

    [color=crimson][I]More weather people?[/I][/color]

    I went after the rest of the weather people.

    ?

    You stole my line.[face_plain]

    [face_grin]

    That was unkind of you.

    [color=crimson][I]You want kind? Go find a puppy.[/I][/color]

    That?s cuddly.

    [color=crimson][I]Cuddly, kind, what?s the difference?[/I][/color]

    If you don?t know I won?t tell you.

    [color=crimson][I]You can?t do that to us! We?re your muse.[/I][/color]

    Muse schmuse, you?re a bunch of nitwits and you know it.
     
  2. Qui-Gon_Reborn

    Qui-Gon_Reborn Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Dec 11, 2008
    Even reading it a second time, I still think it's awesome. =D= Very good work, Tris. :D
     
  3. Kahn_Iceay

    Kahn_Iceay Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Mar 5, 2006
    "No, life is the joke. Death is the punch line."

    you forgot the word ultimate :p



    Its good, I like it, i love the use of the smilies in the story, its very interesting.
     
  4. Phobus

    Phobus Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Dec 24, 2008
    I like the story, it's amusing and interesting.
     
  5. DarthXan318

    DarthXan318 Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 12, 2002
    Heh, I like. :D I'm not that big a Batman-verse person, but the Joker is always giggleworthy.
     
  6. Sinrebirth

    Sinrebirth Mod-Emperor of the EUC, Lit, RPF and SWC star 10 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Nov 15, 2004
    As I said over MSN; love.

    My mind does contortions as to where the Joker ends and begins, and the internal... monologue, monologues (?) does. I'm still reading this as if it's Darth Lolarus, though. Can't help it. :p
     
  7. Reynar_Tedros

    Reynar_Tedros Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Jul 3, 2006
    Agreed. :)
     
  8. mavjade

    mavjade Former Manager star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 10, 2005
    That was awesome Trimaj! =D=

    Loved this part...
    I went out in my bathing suit and whoosh, nearly froze my? well, that?s really unimportant.
    C?mon! We wanna know.


    [face_laugh]

    I love the way you are doing this! Great first entry and I look forward to more!
     
  9. DaenaBenjen42

    DaenaBenjen42 Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    May 15, 2005
    You know what's funny? I could 'hear' his cartoon voice all through this. It's THAT good.

    Well done, Tri. :)
     
  10. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 14, 2005
    Thanks for writting this. After a long working day at school I need a glimpse of madness to stay sane and go on with a smile. I like his twisted thoughts. He is one of my favourite villains.

    :D
     
  11. The Great No One

    The Great No One Jedi Grand Master star 8

    Registered:
    Jun 4, 2005
    first: thanks ye all.

    QGR: isn't this like the third time?:p thanks.

    Kahn: you forgot the word ultimate

    yea yea... i did it on purpose actually. i tried it with, and it just didn't fit as well in this.

    Its good, I like it, i love the use of the smilies in the story, its very interesting.

    thanks. wasn't sure how that would be recieved. was... something of a risk on my part. good to know it worked out.

    Phobus: glad you find it interesting. glad to have you along.

    Xan: he's honestly the only bat character i'd be willing to write, really... oddly enough. and giggles... yes.:p

    Sinre: [face_shame_on_you] this is a completely different individual.[face_tonghe] glad you "love" it though.

    Reynar_Tedros: danke

    mavjade: wow... haven't heard from you in a while. glad you're still around.

    I love the way you are doing this! Great first entry and I look forward to more!

    thanks. first thing i've written in a while, that's purely fic instead of RPing. glad to have you along for the ride.

    Daena: really... you could hear hamil's voice through that? glad i'm not the only one. i was listening to it while i was writing.

    AzureAngel2: again, glad to have been able to help nicole. hope things brighten up for you.

    :snoopy
     
  12. NYCitygurl

    NYCitygurl Manager Emeritus star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 20, 2002
    Very cool diary!! Funny as heck :D

    No, life is the joke. Death is the punch line.

    This was my favorite line. Funny, but also true.
     
  13. BultarSwan

    BultarSwan Founder: Grand Rapids, MI FF star 10

    Registered:
    Jul 5, 2003
    Lovely. Well done, Trim. [:D]

    And I was mentioned too! :D [face_mischief] :p
     
  14. SECRETSISTER

    SECRETSISTER Jedi Master star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 18, 2001
    Oh my! Awesome, Tris, just awesome! You can hear the wheels going 'round in his head. I love it! Congratulations! Keep me linked, dear. ;)
     
  15. Danaan

    Danaan Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 23, 2008
  16. The Great No One

    The Great No One Jedi Grand Master star 8

    Registered:
    Jun 4, 2005
    NYC: funny was at least a bit the goal. glad you enjoyed it. and you can thank kahn for that line, unless that's something from a comic somewhere... not terribly sure on THAT particular note.

    Swan: you were huh... i think i'm missing something...

    Sel: *smiles* thanks, and i will definitely keep you linked. i like making peoples wheels turn and so forth.

    Danaan: O:)


    more coming sometime this week, if things pan out like i hope.

    :snoopy
     
  17. Darth_Bliss

    Darth_Bliss Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Sep 22, 2008
    Oh, looking forward to more Jokerish reality... I would like to be PM:d as well. I really like how you manage to get Joker's "voice" so vivid. Good work.
     
  18. JadeSolo

    JadeSolo Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 20, 2002
    I agree with the Joker - is it really too much to ask that the weatherman is accurate with his predictions? I don't like checking weather.com and dressing for the wrong weather. [face_frustrated] Can't wait to see him take on shrinks. [face_laugh]
     
  19. The Great No One

    The Great No One Jedi Grand Master star 8

    Registered:
    Jun 4, 2005
    Darth_Bliss: consider yourself added, and thanks for the compliments. hopefully i can keep the same vividness.

    JadeSolo: yea, i know. hate dressing for thirty degrees and it ends up being fifty. the reverse is worse though.

    more is currently being worked on.

    :snoopy
     
  20. The Great No One

    The Great No One Jedi Grand Master star 8

    Registered:
    Jun 4, 2005
    And here's the second entry, enjoy.




    [b]Entry 2[/b]

    Jello. They gave me jello.

    [color=crimson][i] Ick. Who would want to eat something that wiggles that much.[/i][/color]

    I have no clue. It makes my spine shiver, and not in a good way.

    [color=crimson][i]And they call you crazy. [/i][/color]

    I know! Who wants to eat something that shakes like that and is the same color as my hair?

    [color=crimson][i]'[face_sick]'

    They gave you GREEN jello? [/i][/color]

    Yes. And I can't figure out why they got after me for trying to kill my shrink with the stuff. Dr. Quinzell was a good sport about it.

    [color=crimson][i]Probably couldn't see the joke in it. "Psychiatrist killed by slimy green goo, Joker Escapes to do shock". [/i][/color]

    Bah, there's no escape in killing a doctor with green jello.

    [color=crimson][i] But it would have been bloody hilarious.[/i][/color]

    I'd rather stab someone with a spork.

    [color=crimson][i]'[face_laugh]'

    How would you kill someone with a spork? [/i][/color]

    Oh, that's easy. You just stab them repeatedly. What's tricky is doing it in a way that makes them smile.

    [color=crimson][i] Well, making yourself smile isn't such a problem. Whoever invented the spork anyway?[/i][/color]

    Someone with too much time on their hands?

    [color=crimson][i] Most likely. We need to know more about how things went with Dr. Quinzell.[/i][/color]

    Oh, that? Well, after I hit her with the jello, which sadly just bounced off, she kept talking to me about how none of this was my fault. Made me want to stab MYSELF with the spork.

    [color=crimson][i] Not your fault?

    '[face_raised_brow]'[/i][/color]

    I don't know. Never understood broads, never will. But this one seems to be a little off her rocker. Like my granny.

    [color=crimson][i] Oh we can just see it now, you sitting in your dear little old grannies' lap... [/i][/color]

    Ummm... Yes. I broke that lap. It was too bony.

    [color=crimson][i] True. It really was. She deserved it. Old people should know not to pinch cheeks.[/i][/color]

    Particularly THOSE cheeks.

    [color=crimson][i] Well, she wasn't precisely a relative.[/i][/color]

    No. But this Dr. Quinzell... I get the same feeling from her. A cheek pincher.

    [color=crimson][i] Trick her. Then kill her.[/i][/color]

    I might, if I didn't think she'd actually swoon over me doing so.

    [color=crimson][i] '[face_plain]'

    Swoon? Since when is that in your vocabulary.[/i][/color]

    Since Quinzell told me that I made her swoon. Whatever that is.

    [color=crimson][i] Ah ha. Maybe you have found your way out.[/i][/color]

    There's no fun in that.

    [color=crimson][i] Are you really that blind?[/i][/color]

    [face_angry]

    [face_not_talking]

    [color=crimson][i] Get over yourself. This would be one of your best gags. Driving a shrink insane. Putting the shoe on the other hand, as it were.[/i][/color]

    [face_thinking]

    True, and shoes do deserve that chance to see which hand they fit better.

    [color=crimson][i] So you just convince her that you're not completely insane, or that your at least making "progress." We all know you're not crazy.[/i][/color]

    Yes, this is true. I know exactly what I'm doing. Most of the time. Now, where's that spork...

    [hr]

    Comments?

    :snoopy
     
  21. SECRETSISTER

    SECRETSISTER Jedi Master star 8

    Registered:
    Nov 18, 2001
    [face_laugh][face_plain]:([face_laugh]

    What else needs to be said? Tris, this is great!!!
     
  22. Penguinator

    Penguinator Former Mod star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    May 23, 2005
    Campy, but dark...cool. =D=
     
  23. DaenaBenjen42

    DaenaBenjen42 Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    May 15, 2005
    You had me at 'jello', Tri. [face_laugh] (Poor, poor deluded Dr. Quinzell.) They let this man have a spork? Oh dear lord... [face_laugh]


    Good entry. :)
     
  24. NYCitygurl

    NYCitygurl Manager Emeritus star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 20, 2002
    The poor doctor. She has no idea what's in store for her.

    Killing someone with jello. Interesting. I'm not sure why he thought that would work :p

    Great entry!!
     
  25. BultarSwan

    BultarSwan Founder: Grand Rapids, MI FF star 10

    Registered:
    Jul 5, 2003
    Trim, I did have a point. I can't remember what it was but I did have one. [face_not_talking]



    Anyways, on to the new. Very amusing. I loooove talking to people in my head so the Joker and I kind of have that going for them. And yes, I'm just kidding.

    The swooning shrink? Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! Shrinks should keep their professional distance. They should also expect to be tuned out and ignored. Personally I don't blame the Joker for disliking her.

    Good one. I like the Joker a lot and look forward to reading more. Um... pm list and all that?
     
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