Missing Images ? Anakin/Amidala between Ep. I and II

Wow! This is incredible!

 

I'm really glad you guys are enjoying this so far!


Today's installment...

 

A year later. (Ani ? 15; Ami ? 20)


It looks fine. Leave it alone.

I should wrap it anyway. It will look even nicer.

Anakin stared intently at the gift lying on the table in front of him. He had been staring at it for ten minutes now, and he couldn?t make up his mind.

How should he wrap it? Should he wrap it at all? Will she care either way?

He had already wrapped and unwrapped it twice. He wasn?t convinced the box looked ornate enough to give as it was.

Amidala was back on Coruscant for another conference. The timing was fortunate, as her birthday was in another two weeks. He would be able to give her the gift in person before she left for Naboo. He really wanted ? needed ? to see her reaction when she opened it.

A familiar, nervous knot twisted in the pit of his stomach as he thought about giving her the present. He had spent weeks trying to find the right thing.

No?that wasn?t exactly true. He had known, almost instantly, what he wanted to give her. He had agonized over whether he should give it to her. He had flip-flopped on that more times than he could count, even after he knew he couldn?t return or exchange it.

But he had chosen to stick with it. Every time. Nothing else seemed right compared to it.

Anakin heaved a sigh and took the gift out of its box. A Trodian crystal prism. A labyrinth of curves and twists that stood about ten inches high. It was beautiful, intricate, delicate ? that?s what attracted him in the first place. Every time he looked at it from a different angle, it changed appearance. First completely clear, then deep purple, a rainbow flash, then translucent pink. It was extremely sensitive to changes in how light hit it; he was sure he hadn?t seen all the possible patterns. Amidala could keep it on her desk at the Palace and watch it change as she worked.

But it wasn?t merely a paperweight or decoration. According to the dealer, it was a Trodian symbol for love ? a gift given to show someone the beauty and depth of your feelings for him or her. A sign that the relationship could last through all kinds of change.

Anakin ran a hand through his hair in agitation. What the hell am I thinking? This is crazy. She would never accept it; he was only setting himself up.

He had always been convinced that he would marry Amidala someday. He had told her as much in Watto?s shop. Six years had done nothing to change his conviction on the subject. From that standpoint, the gift seemed perfect.

It was also why he was terrified to give it to her. He didn?t want to scare her off?her attempts to keep a respectful distance between them hadn?t been subtle. He knew she was only trying to spare his feelings.

What she didn?t understand was that she couldn?t spare his feelings. They would always be tied to her. He knew that she might never return those feelings ? it didn?t matter. He knew he would always love her.

Anakin put the crystal back in the box. Maybe she wouldn?t know the true meaning of the gift. The Trodians were a small cluster of people; the particulars of their culture were not widely known.

Sure, Anakin snickered to himself. He had never been able to fool Amidala. She would most likely see through him in five seconds flat.

But is that such a bad thing? The thought was tentative, he wasn?t sure he if believed it or not. It might be best to lay his feelings out on the table. I at least want her to know for sure how I feel, don?t I?

He knew nothing could happen between them now. He knew he couldn?t expect her to wait until he was older?he knew he couldn?t stop her from seeing ? or marrying ? whomever she chose. Which meant the only point of any of this was?to let her know. To be honest with her, to have no regrets later?to let her know he hadn?t given up.

Anakin took the box ? without rewrapping it ? and headed for her quarters.

[This message has been edited by ami-padme (edited 03-05-2000).]

 

This is so excellant! More!

 

As you wish, Jedi Pikachu...

 

"So, Ami, tell me what's going on at this conference."

Amidala didn't answer. She smiled mischievously, pretending to read a report. Anakin sighed, and she glanced at him next to her on the couch. She tried not to smile.

Anakin had changed his mind. Again. The resolve he left his room with disappeared the moment she had opened her door. He didn't really need to see her face when she opened it. He could just hand it to her on his way out.

Of course, it had been too late to make that decision, since he couldn't very well hide the box. Amidala didn't think he was serious about waiting to give it to her. He had tried to brush her questions off; she retaliated by deciding to ignore him until she was allowed to open her present. She had been gleefully unresponsive since then.

Anakin knew when he was beaten. He handed her the box, hoping he appeared appropriately stoic.

She was grinning from ear to ear. "Well, this is a lovely box. I hope the gift inside is half as nice."

Okay, that's one down, Anakin thought.

She lifted the cover and pulled the crystal out carefully. "Anakin, it's beautiful. I -" she paused as the crystal suddenly reflected a dark red hue. "Wow," she whispered. She kept moving the crystal and holding it to the light, observing the changes.

Two down? She obviously approved, and didn't seem to recognize its significance. "I'm glad you like it. I thought of you as soon as I saw it."

Amidala looked up at him. She was still smiling, but placed the crystal back in the box.

"Ani, do you know what this crystal represents?" She asked the question lightly, with no accusation in her voice.

Anakin swallowed hard. "Umm? I think so?I?the dealer tried to explain it?" He wasn't making much sense, but couldn't think of anything intelligent he wanted to say.

"Ani," she started tenderly, "perhaps this gift isn't entirely appropriate."

Anakin winced slightly. I knew this was coming.

She continued, "It's not that I don't appreciate it, Ani -"

"I know," he muttered. "I kind of figured that I shouldn't give it to you. I'm sorry. I'll take it back and we can forget it."

She shook her head and moved closer to him on the couch. "I really do love the gift, Anakin. It's probably the nicest thing I'll get from anyone." She touched his arm. "And I'm truly touched by what you're trying to say." She waited for a sign that he believed her. He nodded. "I just don't want to unintentionally hurt you."

"You mean, if you get married."

"Well, what if that did happen?" She bit her lip a little. "You know that we can't be together, not in that way, not now. Any new person in my life could be a threat to our friendship."

He vehemently shook his head. "Ami, I would never stop being your friend. I don't think I could do that. You don't have to worry about it."

She looked at him closely. "Do you honestly believe that?"

"Yes," he replied.

"Ani..."

"You know, someday, our ages won't matter so much." He didn't know what made him bold enough to say that aloud, but he continued. "I wish they didn't matter so much now. But I can accept how things are - I have accepted it. I like the way things are now. I wouldn't give that up." He paused for a second, then added, "I would never try to give you an ultimatum - this isn't an either-or proposition for me."

Amidala smiled at him. "I'm glad to hear you say that. Sometimes it's hard for me to tell what you're thinking...especially when you give me a gift like this..."

"That's...the way I feel, Ami," he cleared his throat. "There's not much you can do to change that. But you don't have to see it...as a threat. It's not."

She considered that. Finally, she said, "You're handling this?very maturely. I'm impressed, Ani."

He blushed. "Maybe you can cut me a little slack, when my crush becomes a bit...too obvious for comfort?"

Her smile widened. "I might be able to do that." She gave his hand a squeeze and said, "I'm glad we talked. I needed to know where we stand."

"I want you to be happy more than anything else. And I want us to stay

 

I love that line about it not being a threat! It's like the anti-soap -- two people, honest in a relationship, each sincerely wanting the other to be happy, no mind games (of course, those determined to dislike Anakin would see it as a deliberately manipulative move -- after all, it's obviously designed to make her see that he loves her, and if that's not some evil Sith ploy to control her, what is?), a real friendship...

Super.

 

Thanks, JG!

Here's today part...

 

Three years later. (Ani - 18; Ami - 23)


Ami...

She was in a void, surrounded by emptiness.

Amidala...

She couldn?t see or feel anything.

Ami...

There was nothing.

Amidala...

Except for his voice.

A distant, weak, pleading whisper -- a caress against her mind.

Ami...

Where was he? Where was she? Why couldn?t she answer him?

Amidala...

She had to help him. Why was she always so far away from him?

Ami...

She wanted to answer, to let him know she was there. No sound came out.

There was something more she wanted to say, something else she needed to tell him. But she pushed it aside. It would have to wait.

No...tell me...

What? What had he said? He couldn?t have heard what she --

Amidala...Your Highness?

Your Highness? He never called her that. And his voice sounded different, higher.

"Your Highness? Wake up. It?s Rabé. Your Highness?"

Amidala opened her eyes and found her handmaiden shaking her awake. "I apologize for the intrusion, Your Highness, but I have news --"

"Anakin?" Amidala whispered.

"Yes," Rabé answered in surprise.


Amidala raced from the hanger as soon as her ship landed. They were only a short distance from the medic center. Her apprehension was rising - she worried about what she would find when she got there.

Obi-Wan sent a message hours ago informing her that Anakin had been severely injured in a speeder accident. He wasted no time on the details; he had to keep his Padawan stable until a Healer arrived. Right before slipping into a coma, Anakin had mentally called out for her. They were on Syard, a planet in Naboo?s system, and Obi-Wan thought she might be able to come.

Amidala had left immediately. She doubted she could help, but didn?t need Obi-Wan to tell her that Anakin needed her.

She entered the center and found Obi-Wan looking haggard and fatigued. Amidala hugged him and whispered, "How is he?"

Obi-Wan shook his head. "I?ve done all I can. I?m not trained to heal others, and his injuries are quite severe. The Healer should be here shortly."

"You must be exhausted," she murmured. She glanced over her shoulder. "Eritaé, bring him something to eat and drink."

"Yes, Your Highness."

"Amidala, I don?t need anything. I?m fine --" he started to protest.

"Obi-Wan, you?ve been here for hours, and I?m sure you haven?t had any sleep." She led him over to a row of chairs and they both sat. "Just relax for a minute and tell me what happened."

Obi-Wan reluctantly launched into the story. Their mission had been quite routine. They were here to guide an important trade negotiation at Palpatine?s request, but the parties seemed to have no serious disagreements. They had planned to leave the evening before.

During their stay, Anakin befriended the Minister?s son, a young man about his age. They found that they both shared a love for racing, and spent most of the day in the plains, engaged in friendly competition. Although Anakin had been piloting constantly the past few years, he hadn?t done much land racing since leaving Tatooine. Being on that speeder seemed to spark memories and feelings in him that he wasn?t prepared to handle.

Hours later, Obi-Wan spotted Anakin headed for the hills near the Minister?s residence. He had tried to warn Anakin -- the tiny speeder he was using couldn?t possibly handle the twists and turns necessary to navigate the area, no matter who the pilot was. Anakin pretended not to hear him and continued. Obi-Wan decided to head out after him. He felt the crash just before he could reach his Padawan.

It was miraculous that Anakin hadn?t been hurt worse than he was. He had bailed from the speeder at the last second; his injuries came from the fall, not the crash, which would have undoubtedly killed him. He was now suffering a coma from the blow to his head and internal bleeding in other areas.

Obi-Wan ran his hand over his face wearily and gratefully accepted the water Eritaé handed him before continuing. This was the most out-of-control Obi-Wan had seen Anakin in a long time. He had gotten so much better about co

 

Very good ami-padme! I like the situation you set up here.

 

This is awesome...really. I know that awesome is pretty lame...but THIS IS AWESOME!
Keep writing!

Marie

 

You are such a great writer! Please post soon!

 

Here's more from the previous post...

 

Amidala opened the door slowly, still anxious of what she might find. It had been over a year since she had last seen Anakin. She hadn?t imagined their next visit would be under such circumstances.

She took a few steps into the room, allowing the door to swing shut behind her. A small smile of relief touched her lips. He didn?t look nearly as bad as she had feared. There were bruises and he was pale, but he looked more like he was sleeping than dying. She hoped his appearance wasn?t deceiving.

Amidala sat next to him and took his hand into hers. She kissed it softly. A blush crept across her face as she recalled his reaction the last time she made that gesture. During his last visit to Naboo.


For once, he had visited when she wasn?t overwhelmed with work. For once, he had come without Obi-Wan and without a mission hanging over his head. Neither said so outright, but they almost didn?t know what to do with one another without a million things competing for their time.

Anakin adjusted faster than she did, deciding to focus his undivided attention on her, to take care of her as much as possible. He drove the handmaidens a little crazy, taking over tasks here and there. She wasn?t sure why she let him do it; he soon arranged things so that they were spending every waking moment together. She had to admit that she enjoyed his efforts -- he stopped her from over-working herself, shielded her from the press, and gave her a shoulder to lean on...she could share anything with him, and feel totally at ease and relaxed.

One night, they talked until just before the sunrise. Anakin suggested that they simply stay up to watch it. They sat on her terrace together and waited quietly.

She didn?t know when she had fallen asleep, but when she awoke, the sun was already halfway above the horizon. Her head was resting on his chest; his arm was around her shoulders. She looked up at him guiltily for missing the dawn. He looked back as if he expected her to move out of his embrace.

She wordlessly took his other hand, brought it to her lips, and kissed it.

He had been surprised, that was certain. But he didn?t say anything. They were still holding hands. Finally, he tightened his arm around her and kissed her on the top of her head. She shivered at the contact.

Then Saché had entered the room, ready to give her the schedule for the day.


Amidala sighed, and brought her mind back to the present situation.

He?ll be fine. He has to be.

Had she taken him for granted? She thought of all the missed chats...the times it had taken her so long to write him back...the promised visits that had never materialized. She was always unconcerned, telling herself they would make up for it the next time. But what if there isn?t a next time? She had never considered what it might be like not to have him there...not to be able to count on him...or talk to him or...

She shook herself from that thought. She had to stop being so melodramatic.

He?ll be all right. He has to be.

Amidala felt something hit her hand. She looked down and realized in surprise that she was crying. She wiped the tear from her hand and tried to dry her eyes. What is wrong with me? She couldn?t remember the last time she had cried.

But she knew why she was crying, even if she wasn?t quite ready to admit it. It was the same reason she had been so cross with Saché that morning. The same reason she hadn?t even thought of moving out of Anakin?s embrace.

Losing Anakin?s friendship would be terrible enough. But to lose something they hadn?t even been able to experience...something she hadn?t even told him she was feeling...

And why haven?t I told him? Before the question had fully formed in her mind, the answers came. They couldn?t make it work. He was too far away. They were too busy, too committed to their careers. The Jedi didn?t look kindly on this sort of thing. Her people would be shocked that she had turned down royalty and aristocrats for a Padawan and former slave. He was too young.

That last one almost made her laugh. He certai

 

Awww...that sunrise scene was so sweet! It
seemed to stem from their true love for each
other and I WANT MORE!

Ahem...sorry..too much candy..too late in the evening.

Marie

 

<contented sigh>

Hey, wait, I'm not content! I want more!

 

Great job as always ami-padme!

 

Well, if you liked that, you love this...more sweet stuff (awww...)

Thanks for the comments!

 

Over a week later.


Amidala entered the room, carrying a bouquet of flowers she had taken (with permission) from the Minister?s garden. A laugh greeted her.

"You brought me flowers?" Anakin was sitting up in his bed, looking fully recovered.

"Why not?" Amidala placed them on the table next to his bed. "This place could use a little livening up."

"I won?t argue with that."

The Healer had been successful in reversing most of the damage. She had insisted that Anakin get complete bed-rest before he and Obi-Wan returned to Coruscant. They planned to leave in another day or two.

Amidala sat and took his hand, just as she had done several days earlier. This time he squeezed back tightly.

"How are you feeling, Ani?"

"Never better. I?ll be out of here in a matter of days." He was clearly in a good mood.

"So, were you out of your mind, or did you have a good reason to be racing like that?" She meant to sound teasing, but there was an edge to her voice.

He didn?t seem to notice. "Well, exiled Queens with no hyper-drive aside, I never needed a good reason to race. I?ll just have to choose my speeder more carefully next time."

Amidala tried to pull her hand back in annoyance. He didn?t let her. "What? What?s wrong?"

She didn?t answer, so he gave her a pleading look. Damn. She had never successfully ignored that look.

"How can you be so...thoughtless? Insensitive?" She tried to keep the frustration out of her voice, but doubted that she was succeeding. "Some of us were worried sick about you. Some of us couldn?t sleep or eat...or do anything but sit next to your bed and hope that maybe you?d open your eyes. But that?s all right, we shouldn?t worry because the next time you have some suicidal impulse to go racing over a cliff, you?ll be sure to have a better speeder." Her eyes bore into his, waiting for his response.

Anakin dropped his eyes from her gaze for a moment, and then looked back up. His face and demeanor were now serious. "I?m sorry," he said in a near whisper. "I didn?t mean to dismiss what happened." He paused, and seemed to struggle with the next words. "I remember thinking that I wasn?t going to make the turn...I can?t even describe what that was like. I knew Obi-Wan was coming, but I didn?t think he?d get to me in time." He took a deep breath and added, "I could have died out there...for nothing." He shrugged. "I joke about it because that?s easier to do."

Amidala felt the anger from her outburst dissolve. She wanted to say something to comfort him, but he started speaking again.

"You know, I?m still not sure what happened. I wasn?t particularly upset or angry -- I was more nostalgic than anything. I felt those memories from Tatooine; it was like I was back there again. And I didn?t want to leave. I don?t know if that makes any sense."

"It does," she said simply. "Everybody gets homesick from time to time. But you can?t let it get to you that way. There has to be a better way of dealing with it, Ani."

His eyes shut for a moment. "Usually, I can handle it. I?ve accepted that I?m always going to miss home...and my mother. I have better control over my emotions than I displayed on that speeder." His eyes opened. "I?m going to work with Obi-Wan. It won?t happen again." Anakin lifted his hand from hers and caressed her cheek. "And I am truly sorry that I worried you so much."

Amidala felt herself blushing slightly at his touch. "I know you are. I didn?t mean to jump all over you."

"Yes, you did. And you were right to do so."

There was silence for a moment. Anakin?s hand returned to hers.

Amidala remembered something she needed to ask him about. "Anakin, I...heard you...before I received Obi-Wan?s message."

"You heard me?" His expression was a bit blank.

"Yes. You were calling out to me...in a dream. I think it was just before you went into the coma."

Anakin looked so completely surprised that Amidala began to doubt herself. Maybe it wasn?t him...maybe that wasn?t real.

"No, no -- it was me you heard. I was thinking of you the whole time. It?s

 

OH! This actually made my heart leap! I gasped! How very, very sweet that was!

Marie
waiting for more

 

Great job ami-padme!

 

:JMMJ is bawling. She will not recover until the next post:

Awww...that was so sweet!

 

Like, WOW !

 

Yeah, they do make great couple don't they?

Today's post marks the beginning of the end though, folks. This isn't the last post (there are two more to come), but it takes place around the time of Ep. II, and will eventually wrap things up.

 

One year later. Near the beginning of Episode II. (Ani - 19; Ami - 24)


Amidala stood outside the Senate chamber, dressed in her full regalia, looking royal and aloof. She took in the activity around her while waiting for the signal to enter.

In half an hour, Chancellor Palpatine would be giving his second inauguration speech. The entire Senate would be present, along with the largest assemblage of planetary leaders ever present on Coruscant. It was a stark contrast to the first, low-key event ten years ago. That change was undoubtedly due to the alarming events that were sweeping the Republic.

In the last six months, reports of terrorist violence had spread throughout the galaxy. The culprits were believed to be Mandalorian warriors, although no one group had claimed responsibility. They arrived on worlds without warning -- attacking public buildings, sabotaging government services, taking hostages. Their latest raid led to widespread panic, rioting, and looting on Malastere. There had even been rumors of planned assassinations. The terrorists were undoubtedly professionals, evading capture in nearly every case. Palpatine had argued vehemently with the Senate to be given the power to dispatch the army -- at his discretion -- to any world that did not possess the military capacity to protect itself. He hoped that the move would reduce the time lost through procedures and debates.

This random, inexplicable violence hung over Palpatine?s new term like a pall. The day?s ostentatious display was mostly an effort to restore an air of unity and celebration to the government.

Amidala was a bit amused by it all. Here she was, at an event of great political importance, surrounded by her allies, her peers, the press...and there was still just one person who captivated her thoughts.

She was careful not to allow herself to appear too distracted. But she was mostly searching the crowds for Anakin. He would be attending the speech with Obi-Wan.

They had only seen each other two times since his accident. It was becoming more and more unbearable. They wrote to each other almost daily now, and couldn?t go more than a week with out talking to each other. And it wasn?t nearly enough.

She ached to see him and hold him again...She wondered sometimes how they went without seeing each other for so long. The depth of her feelings for him continually surprised Amidala. She had always been a woman who felt strongly about things, but this was far more intimate than anything she had known before.

The irrational part of her wished that one of them could leave their responsibilities behind and let them be together all the time. Her heart sang the thought, but her head knew it was impossible. She could never ask him to give up his training -- his dedication to becoming a Knight was one of the things she admired and loved about him most. They would have to make it work with the little time they did have together.

"Your Highness?"

Amidala turned to see a Senate aide gesturing towards the entrance. She and the handmaidens entered the chamber.


The Senate was always an impressive sight, but today it was mind-boggling. Temporary renovations had been completed to allow nearly three times as many platforms; it was remarkable that they had managed to fit them in any kind of order. And then there were the decorations -- banners, lights, and streamers of every description hanging from every direction. The effect was almost dizzying.

How am I ever going to find him in the middle of this?

[This message has been edited by ami-padme (edited 03-10-2000).]