Title: My Secret Life Author: Kelia Characters: PadmÃ©, Sabe, Senators Timeframe: Post ATOC - this will cover the first year of Anakin and PadmÃ©'s marriage Genre: Will vary A/N: This is my response to the 2009 Diary Challenge. I'll be updating weekly - yes I said weekly - but if you'd like a PM, just say the word. Thanks to earlybird-obi-wan for the idea and permission to use it Dear Diary, I don?t even know why I?m starting this diary, other than I have no one to talk to about the most important part of my life, strange as that may sound. Everyone is supposed to have someone they can confide in but in my case, things are just too?complicated and I don?t want to burden anyone else with keeping my secret. Well, our secret, really. You see, I have been blissfully married for three days now and I want to shout my glorious news from every rooftop on Naboo but I can?t. Not only that, but I can?t tell a soul, not even my family. That may sound extreme, but in our circumstances, it isn?t. We shouldn?t have even allowed ourselves to peruse our feelings for each other but, in truth, our love was just too powerful and too intoxicating for either of us to resist. Not that Anakin tried but I certainly did. I knew and still know we should have remained strong and kept our relationship platonic but? I could tell you Anakin swept me off my feet, that I so wrapped up in the intensity of his love for me and mine for him that I couldn?t think straight but that would be a lie. The truth is, I love him more than I?ve ever loved anyone before and I wanted to marry him regardless of what it will cost us in the end. I don?t doubt that there will be a price to pay for our love but I believe deep down in my heart, no matter what that price is, Anakin and I will face it together and come out stronger and more in love than ever. Now you may be wondering why I am writing all this down instead of enjoying my honeymoon. Let me just say I did enjoy the honeymoon ? while it lasted. But reality has reared its ugly head, forcing us back to our responsibilities. Anakin left for Coruscant and the Jedi Order this morning and I won?t be far behind him. I?ve two more days on Naboo before I have to return to the Senate and we?ve no idea when we?ll see each other again. As bad as that is, this morning, saying good-bye was worse. I tried to stay strong, as Anakin did for me, but my eyes filled with tears the minute I woke. It was torture fixing his breakfast, helping him gather all his belongings and walking him to his ship, knowing it would be the last time we would be together for who knows how long. Our last moments together were bittersweet. Anakin cupped my cheeks, told me not to worry, that we would see each other soon and gave me the most gentle, tender kiss I?ve ever received. Then he was gone and my tears haven?t stopped. I?ll have to pull myself together by this afternoon when I?m expected at my parent?s house. Somehow, I?ll have to find the strength to smile, laugh and act normal around them, the people who know me best and will be ever vigilant for any signs of anything out of the ordinary. I don?t know how I?m going to do it. Wish me luck.