Before the Saga Not in the Stars (High Republic Kessel Run Challenge)

Title: Not in the Stars

Author: devilinthedetails

Characters: Medley of High Republic characters.

Genre: Variety of genres.

Timeline: Before the Saga-High Republic era.

Summary: An anthology of pieces written for the Kessel Run Challenge.

Author's Note: Written for the Kessel Run Challenge. Thanks to @ViariSkywalker for the inspiration and prompts.

"It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves."--Julius Caesar, William Shakespeare

Index of Entries:

Constellations and Black Holes. Vernestra Rwoh; Imri Cantaros; Stellan Gios. General; Friendship; Drama; Angst; Hurt/Comfort. First Challenge. Post #2.

Meditation on Guilt and Grief. Bell Zettifar; Indeera Stokes. General; Hurt/Comfort; Angst; Drama. Second Challenge. Post #5.

Starlight Snippets. Imri Cantaros; Vernestra Rwoh. General; Friendship; Hurt/Comfort; Angst; Drama. Third Challenge. Post #7.

The Force Defining Itself. The Force; Vernestra Rwoh; Imri Cantaros; Avar Kriss; Elzar Mann; Stellan Gios. Fourth Challenge. Post #11.

 

Title: Constellations and Black Holes

Challenge: Week 1. Write a story between 100 and 1,000 words that starts with this sentence: “Saying goodbye was never easy, but she couldn’t put it off any longer.”

Characters: Vernestra Rwoh; Imri Cantaros; Stellan Gios.

Author's Note: Spoilers for Fallen Star by Claudia Gray.

Summary: Vernestra and Imri honor Stellan's memory and sacrifice.

Constellations and Black Holes

Saying goodbye was never easy, but she couldn’t put it off any longer. That was why Vernestra, accompanied by her erstwhile Padawan Imri, had traveled to Hynestia to bid a mental and emotional farewell to Stellan Gios. The man who had been her Master and mentor. The man who was now one with the Force.

She couldn’t say goodbye to Stellan by a funeral pyre, watching his body consumed by the light and the fire. In Stellan’s case, circumstances had not permitted. A crashed Starlight Beacon had been Stellan’s funeral pyre, and Vernestra hadn’t been there to see it crater into Eiram’s ocean. Steered away from destroying the planet’s largest city by Stellan’s last act of valiant, selfless sacrifice.

At least she hadn’t been there in person. She had been present in spirit through the Force that united all lifeforms across the illusions of space and time but that especially connected her as with a luminescent string that could never be cut to her Master. She had felt his determination and his courage in those long, last moments as he guided Starlight Beacon away from a city of terrified beings and into the depths of the ocean. Giving his life to save thousands of others and not regretting his decision for a heartbeat. Because that was the kind of Jedi and man he was.

The kind of Jedi the Council had held up as a model to all Knights and Padawans scattered across the stars. The one pushed into the limelight of a hundred flashing holocams. The one who smiled as he explained Jedi philosophy to curious holojournalists requesting interview after interview. The one who had saved the Chancellor at Valo and become a hero to the entire Republic in the process.

Vernestra had felt her Master’s soul brushing against hers as Starlight Beacon came to its flaming, impossible end. His touch gentle and affectionate as a tug on her ponytail.

She had sensed the nightmarish depths of the tragedy before she even switched on the holonews. She hadn’t needed the gasping anchors to identify the smoldering ruins sinking beneath the waves as the wreckage of Starlight Beacon. Nor had she needed to hear the breaking reports that Stellan had gone down with Starlight Beacon, steering it away from a city it otherwise would have obliterated in a final act of devotion to the Republic every Jedi was sworn to serve.

Vernestra had listened to the impromptu eulogies the anchors and journalists delivered for her Master as she received confirmation of his death live on the holonews. Tears had streaked down her face. Salty as the Eiram ocean that had swallowed Stellan Gios along with Starlight Beacon.

Yet none of those moments had been a true goodbye. They had been moments of loss and grief. Not acceptance. Acceptance was a true goodbye as a Jedi would understand it, and Vernestra was resolved to be a perfect Jedi in memory of her Master.

She had chosen to make her moment of true goodbye and acceptance on Hynestia at the Temple outpost Stellan had once led in his steady way.

Like many Temple outposts, the one on Hynestia contained a meditation garden for Jedi to reflect on the manifold mysteries of the Force. Since Hynestia was a frigid tundra planet, much of the garden was carved from snow and ice, featuring benches hewn from snow and statues chiseled from ice. The snow and ice of the meditation garden sparkled silver in the moon and starlight.

Imri sat beside her on a snow bench. Much as she had once sat beside her own Master. Sharp and searing as a lightsaber stroke to the ribs, she could recall Stellan pointing out the shapes of the constellations to her, his finger tracing the outline of the stars in the sky. Telling her their names and what worlds spun around them. His eye for spotting the patterns that linked stars together across lightyears of empty, dark space was keener than anyone else, and he never forgot which constellations were visible in what season in the Hynestian sky.

Stellan had loved to stargaze, Vernestra remembered. He had often remarked wryly that one of the few pleasures to be found on a world as harsh as Hynestia was hw bright the stars were when there were no city lights to compete with them. To drown them out. Because too much light somehow became light pollution. Strangely, light needed the dark to define and shape itself. To shine as brilliantly as it should. A paradox it was hard for Vernestra to unravel.

“The stars are so bright and beautiful,” murmured Imri, his thoughts echoing Vernestra’s to what would have been an eerie degree if she hadn’t known that his gift was empathy. An awareness and sensitivity to the emotions and thoughts of others. Especially his Master with whom he shared a special, deep bond forged from grief and disaster.

“Yes.” Vernestra smiled faintly. “Hynestia’s attempt to make up for the bitter cold. At least that’s what Master Stellan used to claim. He enjoyed stargazing. Used to come out here on many evenings and stare up at all the constellations. He could name them all.”

Vernestra wished she could name them all. She could have named them all if she had listened to her Master better. Been a more attentive Padawan. Instead of one who had seemed to assume that he would always be beside her to provide instruction and offer insight. One who had never imagined that he would be snatched from her too soon.

“I’m sorry that he’s gone.” Imri bit his lip. “His star burned so brightly that it’s hard to think of him as dead.”

“He saw the Force as stars and constellations lighting and warming the black of space.” Vernestra squeezed her Padawan’s shoulder as she offered her own eulogy and farewell to the irreplaceable man who had been her Master. “We honor his memory, life, and sacrifice by continuing to shine in the night.”

 

@WarmNyota_SweetAyesha As always, thank you so much for reading and commenting!I'm so flattered that you found this to be an excellently moving moment between Vernestra and Imri. I hope that you will find this next entry to be an equally moving moment between two more of our High Republic Jedi.

@earlybird-obi-wan Thank you so much for being a faithful reader and reviewer of my High Republic content! I'm so happy to hear that you felt this piece was a great farewell to Stellan Gios. More Jedi coming to terms with grief and loss will be explored in this next entry as well, and I hope you will find it insightful to read.

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Title: Meditation on Guilt and Grief

Challenge: Write a 400-800 word dialogue only story where two characters have an argument.

Characters: Bell Zettifar; Indeera Stokes.

Author’s Note: Spoilers for Fallen Star by Claudia Gray.

Summary: Bell Zettifar refuses to meditate on those he has lost.

Meditation on Guilt and Grief

“Thank you for saving me, Padawan.”

“It was my pleasure, Master.”

“We should meditate together. I’ll guide you through it. It might be difficult for you to do it alone.”

“Meditate on what, Master? How I saved you?”

“No. On Loden’s death. On Burryaga’s. On how guilty you feel because you couldn’t save them.”

“Burryaga isn’t dead.”

“He is. You can’t feel him in the Force any more. Can you?”

“I could still feel Loden in the Force, and Jedi older and wiser than me were telling me I had to accept him as gone. Give him up as lost. Only he wasn’t dead then. I could have saved him if I had followed the promptings of the Force and my feelings. Instead of trying to meditate them away. It’s the biggest mistake I’ve ever made. The worst regret of my life.”

“And you’re worried you’ll never forgive yourself for it.”

“I’m determined not to make the same mistake twice. I won’t write Burryaga off as lost until I have a body.”

“Sometimes there isn’t a body to recover, Bell. You must accept that and find your own closure. Your own peace in the Force through meditation.”

“Is that all peace is, Master? Closure? Like the end of a sentence?”

“More like the relief of an exhale after a breath has been held too long. Held to the cusp of suffocation. You must exhale your grief and guilt into the Force before those emotions destroy you, Padawan. The way to exhale those emotions into the Force is meditation. You know that. You’ve been taught that since you were a youngling even if it is a hard lesson.”

“I don’t want to meditate away my guilt and grief, Master Indeera. I don’t want to lose my guilt and grief. Not when those emotions might be all I have left of Burryaga and Loden. Not when losing my guilt and grief would feel too much like forgetting them. Like dishonoring their lives and memories.”

“You must find a way to honor their lives and memories without clinging to a guilt and grief that will drown you. A guilt and grief neither Loden nor Burryaga would wish you to feel on their behalf. You will find such a path forward through meditation.”

“I refuse to meditate on those subjects. Don’t ask it of me. I’ll meditate on anything else.”

“You are a very headstrong, stubborn Padawan, Bell Zettifar.”

“I know that well. Master Loden always had the same complaint.”

“Indeed. In that case, I shall be a model of patience and diplomacy for my headstrong young apprentice to emulate in the fullness of time. I offer you this compromise, Padawan, I will require that you meditate on your grief and guilt, but I will not demand that you do so right away. You will not have a choice about meditating on what haunts you the most, but when you do so will be left to your discretion. I will respect your judgment on when to do so. You will seek me out for my guidance when you are ready to do so. I don’t want you attempting such a painful, delicate meditation without my support. Understood?”

“Understood and agreed.”

“Good. Master Loden would be proud. He would be proud too of how your courage and ingenuity saved all the souls–including my own–in the medical tower as Starlight Beacon disintegrated. So would Burryaga.”

“I don’t want to think about what they would be. It’s too much like meditating on my guilt and grief, Master. And you just said I could choose when I did that.”

“Cheeky. Astonishingly cheeky. But you must learn to celebrate the lives you are able to save while not being ruined by guilt and grief over the ones you cannot save. That is all I am trying to teach you, my headstrong Padawan.”

 

@earlybird-obi-wan As always, thank you so much for reading and commenting on my work!I really wanted the argument in the last challenge to be one where both sides had a valid perspective and point. Indeera definitely has valuable lessons to impart on Bell and has some good wisdom to share with him, but at the same time Bell isn't wrong to want to maintain hope that his friend survived when there is no body recovered especially given his prior experience with Loden. Painful experience taught Bell that accepting someone as dead too soon (when they weren't really dead) can have very grave consequences. So I definitely understood and could relate to Bell's feelings and beliefs in his argument with Indeera. I didn't want it to be a sort of clearcut argument. I wanted it to be a lot more complicated and nuanced than that.

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Title: Starlight Snippets

Challenge: Week 3. Write a set of five drabbles with the following prompts: beacon, discovery, arcane, sister, and burden.

Characters: Imri Cantaros; Vernestra Rwoh.

Summary: Imri, the pain, the wisdom, and the forgiveness Starlight Beacon stirs in him.

Beautiful Beacon

As he approached Starlight Beacon for the first time, Imri Cantaros gasped. It was a beautiful pearl. Radiating warm light and life he could feel rippling in the Force. See shining against the black backdrop of the cold, infinite void of space. A place of study and refuge. A testament to the glory sentient beings could achieve when working in concert.

The sight was so beautiful, it humbled him. Brought glittering tears to his eyes. Pierced his heart like a blaster bolt. Made him mourn the fact that his Master, Douglas Sunvale, wasn’t alive to admire Starlight Beacon alongside him.

Discovering Infinity

It was on Starlight Beacon Imri first discovered how vast and unfathomable infinity was. Staring out a viewport at the vacuum of space, he murmured to his new Master standing beside him, “The universe is infinite. Without end.”

“Yes.” Vernestra nodded.

“But it’s also constantly expanding.” Imri’s breath misted the viewport. “How can both be true? If it’s constantly expanding, it can’t be infinite. To keep growing, it needs to be expanding into something. What is it expanding into, Vern?”

“We haven’t discovered yet.” Vernestra clasped his shoulder gently. “We’re still growing and learning. How can we comprehend the infinite?”

Unraveling the Arcane

Vernestra and Imri spent hours together in Starlight Beacon’s extensive library. Reading through ancient Jedi texts. Many of the scrolls so old they creaked when unfurled.

Documents that might contain insight into Imri’s unique empathic powers–his inordinately strong skills at sensing, shaping, and channeling the emotions of others. That might help unravel the arcane. That might offer guidance on controlling his gift instead of letting it master him in dangerous ways as it had on Wevo.

Making him Force choke a Nihil. Causing him to disobey and duel with Vernestra when she warned him against surrendering to his dark desires.

Like a Sister

Sometimes it was hard for Imri to accept that Vernestra was his new Master. Believing Vernestra was his new Master meant facing the fact that his old Master Douglas was dead, after all. That she was supposed to be a replacement (though she had never claimed to be such) for the mentor he had lost when the Steady Wing exploded.

More than that, she was so close to him in age. Sometimes she seemed more like a sister than a Master to him. At least she let him call her Vern as he had at the Port Haileap Temple outpost.

Apologetic Burden

“I don’t want to be a burden,” Imri mumbled to his new Master as he tried to meditate a surge of guilt roiling through him like an ocean current. “My empathic abilities are just so difficult for me to control.”

“You aren’t a burden.” Vernestra cupped his chin. “You never have been, and you never will be.”

“I already have been.” Imri’s head drooped. “When I defied and fought you on Wevo.”

“You didn’t know what you were doing then.” Vernestra’s eyes were soft with mercy and grace Imri didn’t deserve. “You’ve already been forgiven for that. Now forgive yourself.”

 

@WarmNyota_SweetAyesha As always, thank you so much for reading and commenting!It is always fun for me to visit and explore Starlight Beacon in my writing (and a prompt with "beacon" in it seemed like the perfect opportunity to do that) so I am super flattered that you found the details gorgeous and awe-inspiring.

I was really trying to tap that sense of curiosity and necessity in the search for information in the archives so I am happy to hear that resonated with you. Sometimes it can be hard to capture emotions in only one hundred words! Drabbles can be a challenge in that way!

I find it really interesting how close Imri and Vernestra are, so it was wonderful to have a chance to explore that aspect of their dynamic in the Like a Sister drabble, and I am glad that you found Imri's emotions so understandable.

Burden ripped at my heartstrings because of the guilt and grief poor Imri was feeling, but I think Vernestra offered some very wise and kind advice. One of the nice things about the High Republic era is it features so many Jedi forgiving each other and guiding each other back to the path of Light when someone wanders astray. it is just a very spiritually wholesome and fulfilling element of the era to me, and so it was a joy to be able to try to capture that aspect of it in Vernestra's words to Imri.

Thank you again for reading and for the thoughtful comments!

@Nehru_Amidala Thank you so much for reading and for the kind comments! I am so flattered that you found the details beautiful and that you appreciated how I explored the relationships between the Jedi of this High Republic era. I hope you will continue to enjoy the stories for my Kessel Run as I post them!

@earlybird-obi-wan As always, thank you so much for reading and reviewing! It warmed my heart how Vernestra was able to take Imri as her Padawan after he lost his previous Master, and I definitely think it makes a ton of sense for him to see her as a friend and a sister since they are so close in age. I really loved that aspect of their relationship in the High Republic novels we've gotten so far and so it is a delight to delve into it in my own writing.

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Title: The Force Defining Itself

Challenge: Week 4: Write a story between 100 and 1,000 words from the perspective of the Force.

Characters: The Force; Vernestra Rwoh; Imri Cantaros; Avar Kriss; Elzar Mann; Stellan Gios

Summary: The Force defines itself and its powers in its revelations to the Jedi of the High Republic Era.

The Force Defining Itself

I am above and below you. Before and behind you. Inside and outside you. I permeate and transcend all things. As the Jedi of this High Republic affirm by their creeds and deeds, I will live in you if you will live in me. I give breath and being to all things, and, at the appointed end of each life, I take that same breath and being away again.

I was there when the first atom exploded in fire and bright, white light. Forming the wheeling stars and planets of our universe. Of course I was. I was that atom, that explosion, and that brilliant light. I still am. And when the universe ends, I will be the one to reel its infinity in–to reduce all warmth and light to cold oblivion. I am the beginning and end of all things. The creator of rejoiced in life and the harbinger of death that must finally be accepted because it cannot be defied.

Whenever a life and spirit dies, it is returned to me. I have powers beyond the comprehension of any sentient in the universe, but I choose to reveal my mysteries in part to those who are particularly sensitive to my currents. Who devote their lives to serving my will and becoming ever more attuned to my eternal truth. My undying wisdom.

To Avar Kriss, I am a great song in which all life can be transformed into a harmonious chorus with no discordant notes. To Stellan Gios, I am the radiant golden stars and the black firmament in which they whirl. To Elzar Mann, I am a bottomless ocean in which it is all too easy to drown. I am all these things simultaneously and without contradiction, and I am more than all these things.

To the Jedi, too, I have granted glimpses of my power. To me, there is no past or future. Only an unending now. So to see the past or the future for me is as simple as seeing the present. That is why a Jedi like Vernestra Rwoh can see visions of what to her is yet to come when she travels outside of time in hyperspace.

I am the originator of every emotion. As the source from which feeling stems, I have given a young Jedi like Imri Cantaros the ability to sense and shape emotions. An ability that is more limited than my own but nevertheless mirrors my own.

To each of these Jedi, I have revealed a sliver of myself. These slivers must be combined like pieces of a cosmic puzzle to discover the transcendent truth–the radiant reality–of what I am. How I define myself while at the same time eluding definition and understanding. I am that eternal paradox. That riddle without answer. The Force. Even if you do not know me in life, you will meet me in my final revelation, my invitation none can refuse: death.