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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Saga Nothing Hurts But Her Heart(Padme,Vader)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Turkey, Apr 20, 2003.

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  1. Turkey

    Turkey Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Apr 23, 2002
    So this is actually a Ballad. But I wanted to know what you guys thought if I wrote a story based on this ballad I wrote. I haven't actually got my thoughts together but I think I know where I am heading. ANYWAY, just tell me what you think of it, and what you think if I wrote a story.
    This is about Padme, and what it might be like if she stayed with Vader after he turned to the darkside.

    Nothing Hurts But Her Heart


    He secured her
    In his prison
    No good reason
    In his mind


    Everyday he would beat her
    Kept up until she bled
    Torture and screams concur
    You think she would have fled


    She would survive for another hour
    Then more slaps to the face would come
    He was the one with power
    Her face would slowly go numb.



    And yet she had hope
    That she would endure
    She must grope
    For something pure



    The following day
    Things were grim
    She said she would stay
    She would forgive him



    This monster was in love
    With his beaten captive
    Somehow he rose above
    Hurting was addictive



    He continued to be wicked
    But one day she fought back
    She tried to forgive, but instead
    Her patience began to crack



    That is all she could take
    "Look into the mirror of your soul"
    Her hands started to quake
    It was her life he had stole



    That's when he told her
    "Love and hate are all in one
    I love you, I'll kill you"-----
    The monster was undone!
     
  2. Cammi_Kenobi

    Cammi_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Mar 30, 2003
    It's good :) I think you should eventually try to add onto the end, but if you don't it still very good.
     
  3. Turkey

    Turkey Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Apr 23, 2002
    Add exactly what to the ending? Well.. if i do write a story... HAHA! Everyone will know what happens! Sad....
     
  4. bobilll

    bobilll Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 8, 2002
    Cool ballad! I could soo see that happening...
     
  5. searth_99

    searth_99 Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    Oct 5, 2001
    this sounds really really good!I think you should write a story for it!!go for it!
     
  6. -LadyVader-

    -LadyVader- Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Dec 30, 2002
    Great Job Turkey! This would make a very good story...Do you plan to use a beta? I'd love to take part in such an amazing plot...*wink*....

    -LV
     
  7. Dally

    Dally Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 2, 2001
    Very grim and dark. I love Padme/Vader stories, so I hope you write it.
     
  8. Turkey

    Turkey Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Apr 23, 2002
    I think I possible will. Scares me a little here... i haven't ever written something. I mean I have but not published it on the internet. AHH scary.
     
  9. Cammi_Kenobi

    Cammi_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Mar 30, 2003
    Don't be scared you can do it!!!
     
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