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  1. Welcome to the new boards! Details here!

Saga Obi-Wan Challenge Stories - Closed

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by obi_ew, Aug 11, 2003.

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  1. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Master star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2002
    Trying not to get behind again...

    the Ben name series so far.

    VaderLVR64 Woman, do you ever get any sleep? You write so darn fast and so many. Wow.

    This was adorable. I loved how Obi-Wan was remembering his old Master and the joyous time they had together.
    BenWon the sentinel. Yes, Obi-Wan is that. Great job.

    sheleigh

    he realized he no longer existed. His heart gone, his life stolen?

    Obi-Wan Kenobi was no more.

    Poor Obi-Wan. Living his whole life trying to do the best he can and yet everything is stolen from him. I liked the way you showed his life and what brought him to that moment. Nicely done.
     
  2. Healer_Leona

    Healer_Leona Community Squirrel Whisperer star 9 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jul 7, 2000
    Yikes, a new challenge and already entries... you people are wonderfully fast! :)

    MasterNoi - That is just perfect. I really enjoyed how Yoda set him up. ?But, neglect the future of the Order we can not.? Such true words. A wonderful reason behind the chooisng of Ben.

    jodiwent - ROFLOL! The Wedding Suite? HOw funny! Love Anankin's teasing of who gets carried over the threshold. LOved how relaxed Obi-'Wan felt until he met the ambassadors.. lol!!

    Lovely-in-Orange - Another perfectly reasonable reason for Ben. Obi-Wan Kenobi is a mouthfull for a toddler. Ahh, sweet and yet so sad. Well done!

    Koori - I was almost expecting Siri to be no more than a vision. I like how straight forward she is with him and her ability to still tease him ?As tempted as I am to suggest Oafy-Wan,? LOL!

    VaderLVR - Brought tears to my eyes. Loed the image of Qui-Gon sitting encircled by children and how Obi-Wan joined in the story and of little Liris.

    sheleigh - Ohhh, that is a sad but wonderful look at Obi-Wan's life and what will now be his future. Stunning!
     
  3. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    Will get caught up soon. Just wanted to remind everyone that this is lurker appreciation week on the boards. So to all you lurkers, thanks for reading and please feel free to pop in this week to join in or just say hi!


    [image=http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y10/eitansowner/obibutton.jpg]
     
  4. Layren

    Layren Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 28, 2003
    Hey there guys -- I'm a lurker on this particular thread. I love all the challenge stories ..but Obi-Wan is really hard for me to write so I mainly just lurk :D
     
  5. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    Hi Layren! Thanks for popping in. You are appreciated. [:D]
     
  6. Alethia

    Alethia Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Feb 13, 2005
    *blushes* Wow...I actually found a thread I lurk in. I might have replied once or twice here, but I don't remember *grins* In any case, I really enjoy reading the different fics here. There's such an interesting mix and they're all wonderful.
     
  7. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    VL Beautiful as always. Loved the Benwon. :)

    Sheleigh Welcome back She-lei-lei-lei. :D Very lovely look at Obi-Wan and his past.

    Alethia Thanks for delurking! Please join in anytime. :)

    Okay. I've discovered a new fascination with this character after reading Dark Rendevous. I also haven't written Obi-Wan at this age in a long time so bear with me. [face_worried] Thanks to Shaindl for the beta and for trying to inspire a bunny. :)


    Visions of Darkness


    [image=http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y10/eitansowner/JediPadawanCoinneach.jpg]



    The Temple was mostly dark, its residents having long ago found their beds for the night. Muted lights set in the floor lit the way for the solitary figure who traveled to the training rooms. Dressed in his sleep tunics, and barefoot, the padawan clutched his lightsaber in a white-knuckled grip. Brown spiked hair tipped in blond highlights glistened damply as the boy made his way to the center of a mat where he settled to his knees in a graceful flow of motion.

    Eyes closed, he took a deep breath that quivered in a thin chest as he struggled to find the peaceful wellspring that was the Force. It danced just beyond his reach, teasing him with the knowledge that if only he could make contact, the horror of his semi-prescient dreams would fade to oblivion.

    Padawan Whie Malreaux was amazingly strong in the Force. Some whispered that only Master Yoda and Anakin Skywalker exceeded his gifts. While many of his agemates were envious of those talents, he often saw them as a curse. It was horrifying to envision someone?s death, only to find one's self face-to-face with them, your throat locked in fear of blurting out what you had seen.

    Tonight?s night terror had been vastly different than any of the ones that had come before. He hadn?t seen the fate of a friend and their master; instead, the face attached to a cold and unresponsive body had been his own. Panic once again threatened to overwhelm Whie as he recalled in vivid detail the blue blade that plunged into his chest. A Jedi had ended his life which could only mean one thing.

    He, Padawan Whie Malreaux, was destined to turn.

    "You are up rather late, young padawan."

    Whie?s eyes flew open at the unexpected voice to find a pair of warm blue-gray eyes studying him curiously. It was almost as if they were peering into his soul, ferreting out the dark secret he held close to his chest. Swallowing the lump that had lodged itself in the back of his throat, the boy jumped to his feet in order to bow respectfully to his companion.

    "I couldn?t sleep and didn?t want to wake Master Leem." Whie couldn?t resist posing his own observation. "You couldn?t sleep either, Master Obi-Wan?"

    Obi-Wan smiled faintly at the youngling, amazed once again to find such serenity and poise in someone so young. "I have found sleep to be elusive since the war began. I don?t mean to pry young one, but I couldn?t help noticing how you appeared to be disturbed when I first arrived. Is there anything I can help you with?"

    Whie?s hesitation was painfully obvious, his gaze shifting to a distant point over Obi-Wan?s shoulder. It wasn?t that he didn?t admire and trust the Jedi Master, quite the opposite. His reticence had more to do with the fact that he was ashamed to admit what he?d seen in his future to this man. Legendary in his own right, Obi-Wan Kenobi also happened to have trained the Chosen One. Perhaps Whie was the very Sith that Anakin Skywalker would one day be forced to fight and kill in order to bring balance back to the Force.

    "I had a bad dream," he found himself explaining.

    "Dreams pass in time."

    Whie turned a wide frightened gaze to meet the Jedi Master's. "Mine don?t. Mine come true."

    Obi-Wan didn?t retreat in distaste at the admission, but rather seemed intrigued. "Have you spoken to Master Yoda about this?"

    "Always in motion is the future," Whie garbled in a near perfect imitation of the wizened gnome, drawing smothered chuckles from Obi-Wan.

    Once they?d abated, Ob
     
  8. River_Stone

    River_Stone Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    May 7, 2005
    Yay! Obi-Wan thread! (River_stone sits down and refuses to move)

    I'm a bit new to the boards so please be gentle with me. Great stories on here so far. Here's a very bashful attempt at the Ben challenge. Enjoy, if you can. [face_love]

    Title: Ben

    I wonder how it has come to this.

    How, when you sift through the crystal memories, we have become so different, and so apart.

    I wonder how it has come to me holding a light-sabre to your throat with the full intention of driving it through the flesh - wonder how I come to be standing here, upon an embankment of slag and crumbled ash, doing nothing as you burn in agony beneath me.

    I wonder how it is that I lost you, and what I could have done to prevent it.

    My heart whispers a thousand things. Your cries scream even more.

    Your remaining hand reaches out for me in your agony, an automatic instinct not yet lost, seeking help in a request that is too late to be filled.

    And you know it.

    Oh Force, how you know it.

    ?O...b...?

    Spheres of sun-flare yellow fix upon me, foreign pools trapped in an expression of a broken, withering plea. Your hand raises towards me, trembling with the effort, dry tears coursing down a splintered face both known and estranged.

    You strain to reach for me, and for a blissful moment I allow myself to believe you can be saved...

    Until parts of my name tumble from your lips, letters of jagged hatred burning like the lava threatening to enfold you. I look away, broken open by the torrential hatred burning within you, blaming myself, because it is easier than blaming you.

    Maybe, if I had just been a little more, I could have saved you from this torment.

    Maybe, if you had loved me as you said you had, you would have let me.

    ?O...bi...?

    My name tumbles from your lips, torn fragments of a well-versed mantra once uttered in bedtime sickness and young nightmares, once a shield against the hurt I now know you feared; now a jealous, venomous poison within your veins. I stagger backwards, my eyes fixed to yours, trying with every ounce of my strength not to inhale the burning scent of your flesh.

    ?W...a..O...?

    For an idle moment I wonder what would happen if my name were just a little shorter, wondered if that extra breath needed to work the syllables of my name could have been sent to your quivering fingertips to bridge the gap between mental prayer and incredulous reality. Perhaps, if only you had not had to extend the last breath I would ever see on the complexities of my name, you would have had the energy to reach me, and to say that you were sorry.

    Perhaps.

    But you cannot stumble past that first step, and I am to blame for that.

    It will be the last time that I fail you.

    I step up the embankment, trying to find some remnant of the brother I had loved in the smoking, charred figure clawing fruitlessly up the embankment...

    There is nothing but smouldering memories, twisted and deformed.

    For the first time in my life, I turn my back on you.

    And I realise, in that moment, that Anakin Skywalker is not the only one who has died.

    ?B...e..nh...?

    I close my ears to your vengeful curses, hear you slide further down towards the lava and scream afresh under the pain of the hungry flames.

    You do not call for me then.

    ~~~~~~~~~********~~~~~~~~~~

    ?Change your name, you must,? Yoda had said, enunciating the point with a tap of his gimer stick. ?Need it, you do not. Too obvious, should the Emperor choose to look for you.?

    ?You may want to change your surname as well,? Bail Organa had entered. ?Kenobi is rather a unique name.?

    I would not change my surname, of that I was certain. Every being could claim to hold a unique surname, but that is not the reason for my decision. Some part of me needs to remember the past of my life - needs to accept, and treasure it, even as it rusts in the sands.

    Besides, the names Kenobi and Skywalker are irrevocably entwined. It is not possible to have one without the other. Where one fails, the other is guaranteed to be waiti
     
  9. TKeira_Lea

    TKeira_Lea Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 10, 2002
    *delurks*

    Ashamed to say, but I've been a lurker here for a while.

    [image=http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y255/beechgq/obibutton3.jpg]

    It should read *lurking* is my speciality ;)

    So I'm out. Now I have to participate :p

    (Thanks for Agentj for the button :D )
     
  10. Alethia

    Alethia Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Feb 13, 2005
    River, welcome! I hope to see you around. I love the fic, by the way. The irony that Obi-Wan took the name Ben from Anakin/Vader's last words to him is amazing. But I understand his reasoning for it...

    And Obi-ew, wonderful fic as well. I found the way Whie sees a blue lightsaber killing him and immediately thinks he has gone to the darkside so...don't know...interesting? Anyway, I really liked that part. Little does he know... I also like how he gave Obi-Wan the name 'Ben' as well. Such a paradox... seeing that in the future and then giving the name to Obi-Wan so that he can use it in the future... I do have a question, though. Whie isn't an OC, is he? But if not, where does he come from? I've heard the name before, but I have no clue where the character appears, just in assorted fan fic.
     
  11. agentj

    agentj Jedi Knight star 2

    Registered:
    Dec 3, 2004
    Oh, yeah, TKeira_Lea? Well, let me remind you....

    From the [link=http://boards.theforce.net/message.asp?topic=12633456&start=20078293]Obi-Wan Character Workshop thread[/link]:

    [blockquote]Okay I am going to ask if there are any Obi fans who might help me make an Obi themed button for my Lurker Appreciation Week. I have no talent for this type of thing. What I was looking for was a picture of Obi love with the words "Lurkers are my speciality."[/blockquote]
    You can only blame yourself, my friend! ;)
     
  12. TKeira_Lea

    TKeira_Lea Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 10, 2002
    agentj: You're right. It just seemed in delurking that I should use a button too. If I were half-way smart or artistically talented I would figure out how to make a cool one like that on my own [face_blush]

    Now I guess I'll have to RR to all these lovely entries. I can say this, to date I have loved them all [face_love]
     
  13. Koori

    Koori Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Dec 3, 2004
    oe - very good oe, as always.

    River_Stone very nice also, and welcome. Pop over to the Obi thread in Resource and say hello.
    http://boards.theforce.net/Fan_Fiction_Resource/b10304/12633456/
     
  14. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    Alethia Whie appears in the book Dark Rendezvous by Sean Stewart . Very good book, I highly recommend it. He is also seen very briefly in ROTS. He's one of the Jedi killed by Anakin in the Temple security tape Obi-Wan watches. :(
     
  15. TKeira_Lea

    TKeira_Lea Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 10, 2002
    Dark Rendevous should have been the hard cover. (Instead of Jedi Trial) That book was amazing. I loved Whie so it made it harder knowing that was the boy lying on the ground in the movie. Especially knowing what Whie had foreseen in DR.
     
  16. agentj

    agentj Jedi Knight star 2

    Registered:
    Dec 3, 2004
    TKeira_Lea: Oh, now I get it. You wanted to say you were a professional lurker. :) Sorry. Like Anakin, I'm a bit slow on the uptake. :D

    I'm in the middle of reading Dark Rendezvous now. I bought it at the same time I bought the Revenge of the Sith novel. I bought it because 1) my library didn't have it and 2) I saw the names "Anakin" and "Obi-Wan" near the end, and they had dialogue! :) Despite the fact that the majority of the story is EU OCs, it is quite good. I think I will donate it to my library once I'm done with it. They've got a big Star Wars book display right now with the movie and all that.

    That being said, I can't understand why the Jedi Quest series of books are always checked out and the Jedi Apprentice series aren't....
     
  17. Alethia

    Alethia Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Feb 13, 2005
    Dang it! I was in Barnes and Nobles and I had Dark Rendevous in my hand, but then I got called away and I set it down! And now I won't be in the US until the end of August... *sigh* Oh well, at least I know what to get next time I'm there...

    Thanks for the info!
     
  18. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    Master_Noi ?Master, raising Anakin has been a trial. He has put a fair number of gray hairs on my head. I am afraid a second padawan would make me white-haired and decrepit,? Obi-Wan said chuckling.

    ?Hmph,? Yoda grunted. ?Speak to me of old you will not.? The small master slipped down from the bench, grasping his walking stick firmly. He picked it up and shook it at the younger man. ?When 800 years old you reach, complain of age you may. Come, introduce you I will.?


    [face_laugh] That was my favorite part of the story. It seems Yoda loves to remind people of how old he really is.

    Great job on this. The scene with Obi-Wan reaching down and closing young Ben's eyes made me cry. :_|


    Lovely-in-Orange Great job. =D= I adore the idea of Luke being the one to give Obi-Wan his new name. Very original idea.


    Koori Siri!! Yay. =D=

    He looked down at his now empty glass. ?I?m no good at lots of things.?

    *shakes head* Poor Obi, has no confidence in himself. At least Siri is there to cheer him up. :) ?Yep,? Siri slapped him hard and the back then raised her glass high. ?All hail Kenobi and his massive, near-galaxy-ending screw up!?

    Loved that line. She cuts right to the chase, doesn't she? Good work.


    VaderLVR64 Wonderful writing. =D=

    Very touching look at how Obi-Wan became Ben.


    sheleigh :_| Wonderful look at Obi-Wan's emotional journey from Obi-Wan to Ben Kenobi.

    Terrific imagery. =D=


    obi_ew =D= Loved it!!!

    Interesting idea that his new name come from the long-ago dream of a long-dead boy.

    Hand resting on the boy?s shoulder, Obi-Wan guided his young friend back toward his rooms. The trip was accomplished in silence, both immersed in private thoughts. Both wondering why they felt icy fingers of impending doom tickling down their spines.

    Very haunting. Terrific writing.


    River_Stone *waves* Welcome!

    I liked Obi-Wan's refusal to change his surname. It was very touching that he took the name Ben as a tribute of sorts to Anakin, as a hope that one day his brother may return to him. Very sad, but sooo good.

    ******************************************************

    Well, here is my own attempt. I'm afraid it pales in comparison to the others. But, I'll give it a go anyway.



    Title: Ben Kenobi You Shall Be





    Are you seriously considering taking another Padawan, Master?,? Anakin Skywalker asked his former teacher.

    Obi-Wan looked at the tall Jedi Knight standing next to him. ?You needn?t call me Master anymore. You are a Jedi Knight now, and as such you should call me by my name.?

    Anakin shifted his gaze back down to the floor of the training mat where there Initiate Lightsaber Tournament was taking place. ?I don?t know if I can do that, Master. I?ve spent so long?.it just seems strange to call you by anything other than your title.?

    Obi-Wan chuckled lightly. ?Perhaps my given name would be a better choice for you to use.?

    ?Obi-Wan isn?t your give name, Master?,? Anakin asked, the new information giving him a bit of a shock.

    ?No. When my family gave me to the Jedi, they requested that my name be changed,? Obi-Wan quietly explained. ?They were torn between wanting a better life for me and wanting to raise me themselves, despite their inability to provide much of a life at all beyond unconditional love. So, they asked that my name be changed so that there would be no chance of them ever finding out which Jedi was their son.?

    Anakin had a few tears in his eyes as he listened to the story. He was a Jedi, had become a Jedi because his own mother had been willing to let him go. But he couldn?t imagine being able, or even willing to let go of his own child, the child Padme was carrying. Not even for the child to become a great Jedi.

    Clearing his throat, Anakin spoke in a voice heavy with emotion. ?So, what is your real name, Master??

    Obi-Wan met Anakin?s blue sta
     
  19. Master_Noi

    Master_Noi Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 8, 2004
    oe - "I shall keep that name stored here, just in the event that I one day do find myself on a desert world in need of a new moniker. And the memory will bring back fond memories of you, young Whie. Now, I think we both could do with some sleep."

    Very sweet and sad. Especially that Whie assumed he would be killed by Anakin because he himself turned to the darkside.

    River_Stone - My last tribute to an apprentice I once loved. [face_crying]


     
  20. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    River Stone :_| That was heartbreaking but touching! Just like Obi to honor Anakin, even after all that happened. Welcome!

    JMJ Lovely. :) ?Ah, Ben Kenobi you once were, and again Ben Kenobi you shall be.? My favorite line. Well done! =D=

    Noi, Whie dreamed of being killed by a Jedi in the book. He wrongly assumed it meant he would turn when he grew older and have to be hunted down by the Jedi. In truth he was dreaming of being killed at Anakin's hand as the new Vader wiped out the Temple. ;)
     
  21. Koori

    Koori Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Dec 3, 2004
    Very nice, JediMaster_Jen
     
  22. Siri-Wan-Kenobi

    Siri-Wan-Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Jan 14, 2005
    I am gone for three days and already there is a new challenge and more entries! There are soo many of them, I decided if I were to comment on all the ones I have missed, I would have a far too lengthy post indeed. I loved them all, happy and sad, and a hello to our newcomer*waves* Hope you like the boards. [:D]
     
  23. sheleigh

    sheleigh Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 31, 2002
    OE- Loved it... bittersweet though it may be. Whie is a great character... but not an OC? or is he your creation. :confused: Either way! Wonderful! :)

    River Stone- First off, welcome! :) Loved your story- poignant. I particularly enjoyed the fact that it was Obi-Wan's POV- it gave a different view of the turbulant emotion's of his character at that time.
    My last tribute to an apprentice I once loved.

    To his Master, who could never be quite enough.

    :( Brilliant!

    Jen- Lovely, truly. :) Nice flashback- its nice to see the interaction played between Anakin and Obi-Wan- and the end? Wonderfully bittersweet.


     
  24. LuvEwan

    LuvEwan Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 24, 2002
    o_e So sad. But very sweet and just beautifully written. =D=

    River_Stone I really liked that, especially the part about the names Kenobi and Skywalker being entwined. Heart-wrenching.

    Jen The flashback was so sweet, that Anakin couldn't call him anything else. Great job. ;)
     
  25. Shaindl

    Shaindl Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2002
    Good god, people, slow down! :p

    Truly, these are all wonderful. Great to see so many new people joining in too - welcome to all of you! :)
     
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