JCC ~~** OFFICIAL **~~ WACKY NEWS DEPOSITORY THREAD. TOS MINDED. MOD APPROVED. PROBABLY

****ing weirdest necroquote ever.

 

*facepalm* Yeah, I was thinking of Connemara and JediWarrior. Big Brain Fart.

 

In a story that has nothing to do (hopefully) with JCCers...

Woman falls out of moving car onto highway while filming Snapchat video.

 

But did she complete her snapstory?!

 

Giant rat discovered in Mexico

 

ANYTHING CONSENTING ADULTS DO IN THEIR OWN HOME while being broadcast live over YouTube during a congressional debate about pension investments...?

 

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/09/25/world/asia/vietnam-recycled-condoms.html

2nd hand condoms....

 

Ever fantasize about an anonymous hacker permanently denying you access to your own genitalia? Now that can be your reality!

Content warning: article contains both the word “penis” and the phrase “heavy-duty bolt cutter.”

 

100-million-year-old giant sperm found trapped in amber



Okay, yeah, I just posted the joke, but the article is actually worth reading for 2 reasons. 1. Not Michael Crichton interesting, but still interesting information about ancient animal life. 2. The names of the sperm-studying scientists keep hilariously interrupting everything the second you actually start focusing on what the author is saying. I won’t spoil it by telling you what they are, but the effect is like sitting next to a kid who keeps making fart noises every time the teacher gets the class’ attention. And yes, I am a child.

@vin @harpua — Isn’t this stuff you laugh at too? I summon you because I don’t think anyone actually reads this thread.

 

This is, indeed stuff I laugh at. <3

 

There is no way this isn’t a scientific community onion. I cannot believe a sperm scientist is named

Spoiler

He Wang.

 

Escaped cloned female mutant crayfish take over Belgian cemetery

Actually, they've taken over a lot more than a Belgian cemetery. According to the article, the crayfish have made inroads on 4 continents, and are especially prevalent in "Austria, Germany, France, Japan, Madagascar and Israel."

I'm not sure if "Escaped cloned female mutant crayfish take over Austria, Germany, France, Japan, Madagascar and Israel" is a better headline or a worse one.

 

He is back
Adolf Hitler elected in Namibia

 

This is YouTube pranks suck. You don't know who your pranking and end up with a posthumous Darwin Award.

Not a 'fun' whacky, but I didn't know where else to put it.

 

Why would someone do that as a "prank" to begin with?

 

YouTube fame, unfortunately.

 

Cannon explodes at baby shower.

 

Koala causes pile-up.

 

Shared this in the Local News thread but belongs here too

https://www.cracked.com/article_28014_the-crazy-story-fake-burger-king-in-pittsburgh.html

 

Bomb Squad called in for 'suspicious package.

This was part of the contents of said package:

 

Twitter (bug) bans people for using the M word: Memphis.

 

'Serial Stowaway' back at it again.