Lit One Sentence or Less -- REBELS (SEASON 1)

In honor of the Essential Reader's Companion, I thought it would be a fun game to compose our own novel summaries, but for those busy professionals out there who can't swallow a 500-page guide. So let's see if we can boil these suckers down into one sentence or less. By "or less", I mean that you get bonus theoretical points for brevity - if you can do a phrase, even better. That said, I'm gonna go ahead and declare 1-3 words off-limits, because I can see a lot of people just saying "crap" or "best book ever" rather than actually summarizing.

The goal here is to honestly encapsulate the gist of a book as briefly as possible. Readers vote for their favorite via likes, and each round should continue for at least a day or two, depending on whether a clear frontrunner emerges. I may or may not babysit this thing extensively, so if a given round seems to be over, anyone who wants to move on to the next is free to do so.

Personally, I'm gonna go roughly chronological starting at Endor, but we can pretty much do any order we feel like - and both novels and comics at will. Once we get a bunch of winners I want to actually compile them into some kind of document, so while cleverness counts, try not to be so ridiculous that your sentence isn't actually helpful.

Okay, The Truce at Bakura. Go.

 

Luke kills Dinosaurs.

 

Leia's Daddy Issues.

 

Invasion of the evil reptilian soul-snatchers from another planet. No, really.

 

Extra rule: once a round is over, new submissions can supplant old winners if they receive more likes than the original did.

 

Jurassic Park is frightening in the dark.

 

Techno-slavery, Imperials, and lizards, oh my!

 

Palpatine's dead, so space lizards try to steal everyone's souls to run their doors.

 

Alternative submission (posted separate for the sake of keeping track of the likes):

The Matrix, but with velociraptors.

 

Luke the Ladykiller, Part 1.

 

Seriously? No one's said it yet?

Dinosaurs on a spaceship.

 

Never mind the New Republic, here's a boring planet in the middle of nowhere!

 

Curse your sudden yet inevitable betrayal!

 

Luke has a relationship with a young boy, who is killed by space dinosaurs.

 

Imps and Rebs fight raptors in pyramids.

 

Bump; giving TAB one more day.

 

Dinosaurs with humans.

 

Rebels and Imperials defeat dinosaurs who decided humans make great duracells.

Dibs on RCrder 66: Four weddings and a funeral.

 

That is one sneaky way to get a like by bringing up two at once...

 

Speaking of which, I reserve the right to disqualify a winner if their line doesn't actually describe the book at all. Looking at you, cavalier_one.

 

I've been calling it that for years, and didn't want to get ninja'd

As for Cav_One, it does fit rather well. Both for the sudden but inevitable betrayal at the end, but for the dinosaur reference due to Wash. Great Firefly scene.