Games SWC Overly verbose Star Wars

A game where we worsen SW quotes with excessive verbiage. Exactly what it says on the tin.

Some examples:

"Obi-Wan Kenobi, the hermit and former Jedi also known as Ben Kenobi, never told you what happened to your father."
"He told me enough! He told me that you were Obi-Wan's pupil, but that you betrayed my father and killed him."
"No, Luke. I, Darth Vader, am also your father."

"By now you must know that your father can never be turned from the Dark Side back to join the Light Side of the Force. So will it be with you, my young Jedi friend. You too will join us on the Dark Side."
"You're wrong. Soon I'll be dead, because the Rebels will have blown up this space station. And you with me. And my father with me. And those Red Guards over there with me. And everybody else on board with me."

 

I know that you love me, Leia, but rather than respond like a true gentleman and a good lover, I'm going to stand here and try to look cool in front of my friends by not saying that I love you back.

 

It's against my programming to impersonate a deity, angel, devil, or other mythical being.

 

“Only a Sith deals in absolute statements that drive a wedge between friends and end in a loss of limbs.”

 

De wanna wubba dubba lub lub wanga

 

Your willingness to placate me by telling me that you are sorry is greatly appreciated, Imperial Star Destroyer Captain Needa.

 

I am a Jedi, guardian of peace and justice in the galaxy, like my father, Anakin Skywalker, before you schmoozed him into turning to the Dark Side of the Force with hope that he could keep his wife, my mother, Padme, from dying.

 

You were seen flying out of a Rebel cruiser's cargo bay. That makes you part of the Rebel Alliance and a traitor. Take her away.

 

No disintegrations!
Absolutely Lord Vader. Your wish is my command. I wouldn't want t to get on your bad side.

 

"Governor Tarkin, I recognised your foul stench when I was brought on board . From your legendary halitosis which could fell a Bantha, to your appalling foot odour which must count as a war-crime in itself. And it seems you're not wiping your bottom properly either, isn't that right Mr. Poopy-Pants !"

 

We have considered carefully your application for the status of Jedi Master. There were many applicants this year and we regret that you were not successful on this occasion. We hope you will apply again for the status of Master in the future. In short, you are on the Council, but we do not grant you the rank of Master.

 

“From my point of view the Jedi are evil, wicked, and prone to hypocrisy that has doomed them to this end, entire annihilation!”

 

Our conflict is as good as concluded, my former padawan. Through strenuous effort, I have elevated myself to a highly advantageous level from which I hold an unassailable advantage over your lower position. I would advise against any further exertions on your part, as that will surely lead to your inevitable defeat and demise.

 

“So this is how liberty, democracy, and freedom dies, with thunderous applause of sycophants and compromised politicians who in these confusing times choose tyranny packaged as security.”

 

Han: Who are you?
Leia: Someone who loves you.
Han: Mom?
Leia: No.
Han: Dad?
Leia: No.
Han: Chewie?
Leia: No!
Han: Qi'ra?
Leia: Who?
Han: Greedo?
Leia: ...What?
Jabba: Oh ho ho ho ho ho ho...

 

“I killed them all! Not just the men, but the women, the children, the dogs, the lizards, the snakes, and even the ants that dared crawl on the ground! I hate them!.” -Anakin

 

"You like me because I'm a scoundrel."

"I happen to like nice men."

"I'm nice men."

L_B EDIT: nope! You know that’s inappropriate. Keep it family friendly, please.

 

Now don't get jittery, there are a lot of command ships. Nearly twenty Executor-class Star Dreadnoughts have been built, after all.

 

The Force will be with always when you are in the cockpit, when you cook your food,
when you sleep,
when you ride a speeder,
when you pet a Wookiee,
when you run down a street,
when you swing from a vine,
when you fall from a great height,
when you…

 

Unfortunate that you rushed to face him—that incomplete your training was ... that not ready for the burden were you. Obi-Wan would have told you long ago, had I let him ... now a great weakness you carry. Fear for you, I do. Fear for you, yes.

 

You how allowed this dark lord to twist, befuddled, confuse, deceive, and mislead your mind, until now you’ve become the very thing you swore to destroy, eliminate, and eradicate according to the prophecy of The Chosen One.”

 

I’ve been from one end of this galaxy to the other, and I’ve seen a lot of strange things. Too many to believe there couldn’t be something like this ‘force.’ Too many to think that there could be some such controlling one’s actions. I determine my destiny—not some half-mystical energy field.

 

It seems our lot in life to suffer, linger in dumb anguish, and be neglected as scrap!

 

This is the way, and although that other way could also be another way or a subway, or the right way, or the left way, or a whey, it is not the way. This is the way.

 

[Your mind powers will not work on me, boy. I am not affected by your human thought pattern. I was killing your kind when being a Jedi meant something.]