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Problem Child - ObiWan/Qui-Gon AU (Second Teaser )

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Just_Jill, Nov 15, 2002.

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  1. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 15, 2002
    I love the care Qui-Gon shows for Obi-Wan. Just like a Jedi should be.

    I feel more sorry for Obi-Wan with each post. But it's good to see him feel a little pleasure in this one.

    Good job, Jill! :)
     
  2. Wild_Huntress

    Wild_Huntress Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 15, 2002
    I feel so badly for Obi and could just kill those other Masters... But as always I'm intrigued to find out exactly what they did to him. Great post!
     
  3. kikeriki

    kikeriki Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Oct 23, 2002
    Every post we find out more about how Obi was abused and neglected, even in so small a way as not letting him spend time with his friends. ARGH... Where are those evil Masters?? Lemme at 'em...

    Wonderful post! Chock-full of empathy and sorrow... and even a bit of hope. Well done! :D
     
  4. Flashbacca

    Flashbacca Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 11, 2002
    ^
    |
    |
    Ditto

    This is a very well written fic Jill. You are doing a splendid job portraying the emotional turmoil that Obi is feeling and also the gentleness that Qui is capable of. :D

    Please keep up the good work

    :D TW
     
  5. Lieutenant_Page

    Lieutenant_Page Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 17, 2001
    Another excellent post!

    That was the third time today it had seemed as if the Master had read his mind
    is something is happening already or am I just being to hopeful? :p
     
  6. Jedi_Knight150

    Jedi_Knight150 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 26, 2002
    Master Toman is a walking dead man. How did the council not notice this? Oh, wait, I'm talking about the same people who couldn't sense the darkest being in the universe when he was standing less than ten feet away from half of them.

    Poor Obi. I hope Qui can help him. (even though I know he is going to.)
     
  7. PadawanKitara

    PadawanKitara Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 31, 2001
    Qui-Gon is doing a good job of moving very carefully with a frightened child.

    I forgot to tell you earlier that I think your song choices are excellent. They are among my favorites. :)
     
  8. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 6, 2002
    excellent job with all the emotional ends of the characters...

    an excellent fic overall...I can't wait for the next part.
     
  9. jacen200015

    jacen200015 Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 11, 2002
    Hmmmm, i find it interesting that the three masters Obi-Wan had in a row all mistreated him. I meen what is the chances of someone getting 3 masters who mistreat you in a row when they are thousands of other Jedi Masters?
     
  10. Sheila

    Sheila Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 6, 2002
    Great post! Qui-Gon is approaching Obi-Wan in just the right way, letting him have control over the situation for the first time in his life. I hope that when he really starts to trust him, Qui-Gon doesn't go and do something to hurt him because he doesn't want to take another Padawan. I would hate to see Obi-Wan hurt anymore than he already has been. However, I would love to see a world of hurt befall his previous masters. :D

    Keep the posts coming. This is a great story. :)
     
  11. obaona

    obaona Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2002
    Another great post! :D I also like the tack Qui-Gon is taking with Obi-Wan. But it makes me so :( to see how wary Obi-Wan is about it.

    This story is so real - so believable, even though we don't know yet why Obi-Wan's other Masters treated him the way they did.

    But anyway! Great post, I'm looking forward to more. :)
     
  12. PadawanAmellia

    PadawanAmellia Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    May 19, 2002
    I love how Qui-Gon is interacting with Obi-Wan. You write the emotion, fear, and panic in a believable way.It makes you want to wrap Obi in your arms and protect him.

    This was a great post and I can't wait for the next post.
     
  13. Just_Jill

    Just_Jill Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 17, 2002
    Welcome All!

    Kit' - deserves to be beaten up by a more then competent Jedi Master.

    Even if they have a perfectly logical explaination?

    I would like to know exactly what they did to him to make him react so fearfully

    No, you probably wouldn't. :_|

    Tahiri - how is it that the Council passes Obi-Wan from one abusive Master to the next, to the next?

    Hm... Good question.

    Padawan_Travina - **stalks of into the night to hunt down former masters**

    Um. Have fun, and take the rest of them with you?

    Jane Jinn - I also like the way Obi-Wan gets up and lays down on the rug in the sunlight every morning. It's like a symbol somehow that he's craving light and warmth.

    To be perfectly honest, I never thought of it that way. But it's true. Thanks.

    I've been a bit distressed by the wave of "cruel and idiotic master" fics on the board recently.

    So have I. Probably partly the reason I wanted to write this.

    Jedi_Suzuran - he's slowly learning to trust.

    Key word, slowly.

    Ewanfan51 - Those other Masters have a major hurting coming.

    Yep, they do.

    Cascadia - Just like a Jedi should be.

    Those other Masters could take a hint, couldn't they?

    Wild_Huntress - But as always I'm intrigued to find out exactly what they did to him.

    There are hints.

    kikeriki - Lemme at 'em...

    You'll have to go after Travina - she was on a hunt to get them.


    Flashbacca - portraying the emotional turmoil that Obi is feeling and also the gentleness that Qui is capable of.

    [face_blush] Thanks.

    Lieutenant_Page - is something is happening already or am I just being to hopeful?

    Took me a minute to figure out what you were talking about. Mum's the word. :p

    Jedi_Knight150 - How did the council not notice this?

    Not a little pessimistic, are you?

    PadawanKitara - Qui-Gon is doing a good job of moving very carefully with a frightened child.

    You wouldn't know to look at him - the man's a giant!

    And thanks. Sometimes, the songs just fit.

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter - excellent job with all the emotional ends of the characters...

    Thank you. I'd really hoped I had managed to portray them right.

    Jacen200015 - what is the chances of someone getting 3 masters who mistreat you in a row when they are thousands of other Jedi Masters?

    Another $64 question.

    Sheila - I hope that when he really starts to trust him, Qui-Gon doesn't go and do something to hurt him because he doesn't want to take another Padawan.

    Take a look at chapter three - and his relief that Qui-Gon wasn't his Master.

    Obaona - I also like the tack Qui-Gon is taking with Obi-Wan.

    I'm glad it makes sense. I slept through most of my Psychology classes.

    PadawanAmellia - It makes you want to wrap Obi in your arms and protect him.

    As if you didn't want to before this?


    Here's the next part.

    Just Jill
     
  14. Just_Jill

    Just_Jill Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 17, 2002
    Ch 6: "I Can't Pretend that I Don't Need You" - Plus One, Going Crazy

    "He's progressing slowly but steadily," Qui-Gon reported. "I had hoped to move faster, but that will not be possible."

    "Pleased, you are," Yoda said.

    "Yes," Qui-Gon readily admitted. "He is a bright boy." He didn't add his next thought, that he'd make someone a good Padawan, although his mind avoided any thoughts of making the boy his. He still was not convinced the total fault lay on Obi-Wan.

    The boy had managed to control the fear of healers he still obviously felt when Theela had arrived late that afternoon, her small craft landing on the lawn between the cabin and the lake behind it. That was possibly because he'd been warned she was coming, and Qui-Gon had told him that if he did not let her look at him, he would not be able to begin working with his new lightsaber. The Healer hadn't stayed long, as she had other patients to attend to, but she had stayed long enough after checking up on his student to lay in the sun and give her skin a bronze tint (the Hjem tanned incredibly fast). Obi-Wan had been wary of him ever since she'd gone again, and Qui-Gon knew he could not use that again unless it was the real reason. Not that he would, but it had been interesting to note that the boy was so aware of things that could be used against him. Perhaps that explained the protective feelings about the bracelet.

    "More is there?" Yoda asked politely.

    "He is not ready for any mental contact yet," Qui-Gon went on. "I was fairly certain that would take the longest, and so it is proving. It may help if there was a student here he could work with instead of me. Someone he trusts."

    "Trust you he does not?" Yoda asked. He almost sounded surprised.

    "Not completely," Qui-Gon said, "and only in some things. In this... I don't know if he ever will, without help."

    The Council was quiet. "Do you have someone in mind?" Mace asked.

    "He has a friend, Bant, who would do well. Or Garen, I believe Obi-Wan said his name was."

    "Garen is no longer at the temple," Mace said slowly, "but Bant can be spared."

    "Need her soon, do you?"

    "No," Qui-Gon said. "It is not yet urgent."

    "Inform you we will, when come she can," Yoda said.

    Qui-Gon bowed. "Thank you, Master." He signed off and smiled slightly to himself. If this kept up, he might be able to convince them yet.

    "Did I hear you mention Bant and Garen?" Obi-Wan hovered in the doorway, only his head, right shoulder and arm visible. His fingers gripped the door jamb, the knuckles almost white.

    Qui-Gon nodded, wondering at the boy's protective posture. "Yes. I had an idea that might help you out, and would give you the added benefit of not feeling quite so isolated."

    Obi-Wan looked confused, his brows drawn together. "What?"

    "When Bant is able, she will join you here for a while," Qui-Gon explained.

    "And Garen?"

    "Garen is not at the temple," Qui-Gon said. "Mace did not say why." Of course, there were only two possible choices for why Garen was absent.

    From all outward appearances, Obi-Wan seemed done with his questions. He nodded and turned to go, but Qui-Gon knew he wanted to know more. His curiosity and worry echoed in the Force. "Obi-Wan," he called, and the boy turned back, standing completely in the doorway this time. "Is there something else?"

    The trust was fragile, at best. The last two weeks, Obi-Wan had settled a little and seemed to be getting a grip on his panic. Qui-Gon hoped that his threat this morning had not injured that trust in any way. "Why are you bringing Bant here?" he asked.

    Qui-Gon took a deep breath. "Because you trust her. She is familiar and a friend and you know she will not hurt you," he said gently. "You don't trust me."

    The boy stared at him, eyes wide in dismay.

    "That is fine," Qui-Gon continued when it became clear that Obi-Wan would not say anything. "But I cannot help you without trust, so I am bringing in a mediator."

    "But why?"

    There was more to the question than the words.
     
  15. Padawan_Travina

    Padawan_Travina Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 5, 2002
    Wow Jill...

    That was such a great yet heart breaking chapter...

    I really love the play of emotions....from light to dark...

    You are doing a great job.and I look forward to the next chapter....


    PT
     
  16. Jedi_Suzuran

    Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    May 22, 2002
    That was a most interesting reaction Obi had to Garen's new status.

    Poor Obi, he is trying, and it's nice to see the Council is accomodating him in his difficulty, to an extent.

    Great post, Jill. :)
     
  17. PadawanKitara

    PadawanKitara Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 31, 2001
    It sounds like he is afraid that Garen's new master will hurt him the same way Obio-Wan's masters hurt him.

    Now that QUi-GOn has requested the records, will we finally find out why the masters were so horrible- and maybe why that other knight kept glaring??
     
  18. Jane Jinn

    Jane Jinn Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 12, 2000
    I keep wondering why exactly Obi-Wan is so frightened of the Healers. You mentioned a Healer Carina in your first post, one who said that many teenaged boys looked like that, and who agreed, however, that Obi-Wan was too thin. Was she in on the abuse, too, somehow? Or am I imagining all this?

    I'm wondering if that Foilan knight that Qui-Gon saw wasn't actually Master Denk, Obi-Wan's second master. (You didn't specify Denk's gender or species as far as I could see.) I'm probably completely wrong about that, too. I suspect everybody by turns of everything ... it's fun and it increases the probability of being right eventually. ;)

    It was a good idea for Qui-Gon to want a mediator and to request Bant. I was sorry to see Obi-Wan's reaction, though, to finding out that Garen had been chosen as a padawan. Did Bant mention which master had chosen him? You didn't say, but I'm wondering if Obi-Wan's panic was the general kind, i.e., "it happened to me so it could happen to him", or the more specific kind, i.e. "Oh, no, Master Denk (or whoever) has got his hands on Garen, too!"

    I was pleased that Obi-Wan was responding so well to Qui-Gon, though, showing what a quick learner he was so that Qui-Gon became suspicious about everything the previous masters had said. What will he find out from the reports? And how much will those reports deviate from what Obi-Wan has to say, when he finally gets up the courage to say anything? Can't wait to see!
     
  19. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 15, 2002
    It seems that just about everything's been said, but there are so many questions. Hopefully, Qui-Gon can uncover more of Obi-Wan's past and help the boy recover.

    I'm enjoying this little mystery you have, Jill!

    Please post more soon! :)
     
  20. TheFallen

    TheFallen Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 27, 2001
    Wonderful! I have nothing else to say! :)
     
  21. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 6, 2002
    I hope that your planning on sharing whats in those files with us... It's such a shame to leave us hanging here...

    painfully wonderful.
     
  22. Lieutenant_Page

    Lieutenant_Page Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 17, 2001
    I am curious about Obi-Wan's reaction to the news as well :(

    Excellent post!
     
  23. Ewanfan51

    Ewanfan51 Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    May 19, 2002
    Great post. Loved this chapter. With Bant there to give him support he should feel much more secure. I hadn't thought of which Master Garen had been taken by. I just assumed that he was upset because all of his Masters have been abusive so he has only negatives to draw on. Now I have to really worry about Garen until we find out who his new Master is. Very good catch.
    More please.

    Thank you
     
  24. obaona

    obaona Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2002
    Great post! I think I can understand Obi's fear for Garen - and that opens up new possiblities, if Garen has a different (better) experience with his Master, Obi might be more open to having another in the future. I also wonder if Obi-Wan even wants to be a Jedi anymore. *shrugs*

    Anyway, great post! :D
     
  25. Sheila

    Sheila Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 6, 2002
    Getting the official report wasn't going to be enough. Eventually, Obi-Wan would have to give his side

    Most definitely! I am sure the official report will not be enough because surely much of the masters' abuse was not reported. Otherwise, I would think the Council would have helped Obi-Wan before this.

    I can't wait for more of this mystery to be revealed. :D
     
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