main
side
curve
  1. Welcome to the new boards! Details here!

Problem Child - ObiWan/Qui-Gon AU (Second Teaser )

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Just_Jill, Nov 15, 2002.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Tahiri

    Tahiri Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 9, 2001
    Ah... I definitely need more of this fic ;) I like how you had that touch of Obi-Wan being afraid for his friend, and how he curled up. That's the way I feel when I go into math class [face_throw_up] Anyway, I hope to read more soon! :D
     
  2. jacen200015

    jacen200015 Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 11, 2002
    Could the Masters have somehow been jealous of Obi-Wan?

    Or


    They didn't like something about Obi-Wan?
    but if that's the case then why did they choose him as a padawan?
     
  3. Just_Jill

    Just_Jill Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 17, 2002
    Good morning!

    PadawanTravina - from light to dark...

    Which will he choose?

    Jedi_Suzuran - it's nice to see the Council is accomodating him in his difficulty

    Isn't it?

    PadawanKitara - will we finally find out why the masters were so horrible

    Perhaps.

    Jane Jinn - showing what a quick learner he was so that Qui-Gon became suspicious about everything the previous masters had said.

    Nothing like truth to make someone lied to suspicious.

    As for the rest of your guesses - I'm not telling. :p

    Cascadia - I'm enjoying this little mystery

    That's the whole point. I'm glad you like it.

    TheFallen - Wonderful!

    [face_blush] *bows low* Thank you.

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter - I hope that your planning on sharing whats in those files with us...

    Um...

    Lieutenant_Page - I am curious about Obi-Wan's reaction to the news as well

    Curious how?

    Ewanfan51 - With Bant there to give him support he should feel much more secure.

    One would certainly hope so.

    obaona - I also wonder if Obi-Wan even wants to be a Jedi anymore.

    Scary thought, isn't it?

    Sheila - I am sure the official report will not be enough

    Shouldn't be, really, should it?

    Tahiri - That's the way I feel when I go into math class

    Oh, I'm sorry. Terrified that someone is going to mess with your mind? Oh, wait, it's Math. Run for your life! :p

    Jacen200015 - if that's the case then why did they choose him as a padawan?

    That is a very good question.


    Thank you guys so much for reading this! I really appreciate it.

    Just Jill
     
  4. Just_Jill

    Just_Jill Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 17, 2002
    Ch 7: "Show Me That My Will Survived the Tragedy that Came into My Life" - Queensrÿche, Best I Can

    Obi-Wan opened his eyes and took a deep breath. He hadn't realized how much pain had been in the back of his mind until it was gone. He and Bant had been working steadily through the week on the exercises Qui-Gon had given them, each one harder than the last. The latest had taken them a day and a half to finally complete, but they'd managed.

    What had disturbed him - and he was sure Qui-Gon had noticed their silence at dinner - was Bant's suggestion that they bring the Knight into their connection. It had taken him by surprise, but even more surprising was how comfortable he was after the initial shock had worn off. That he was so comfortable with the thought of working with Qui-Gon had truly frightened him, so he'd retired early to meditate on it.

    Meditation was helping a little, but it wasn't the answer he wanted. He had no reason not to follow Bant's suggestion. Everything he'd observed led only to the conclusion that Qui-Gon was nothing like his former Masters. At least, it was taking him longer to turn into the kind of people his Masters had been. Perhaps it was an unfavorable comparison, but it was the only one he had.

    He took a second deep breath, and let it out in a sigh. Tomorrow was another day. He climbed into bed and slept immediately.

    When he woke, he went to find Bant. She was sitting on the edge of the white rug, smiling with closed eyes into the rising sun. Obi-Wan settled next to her and closed his eyes to bask in the warmth.

    "You are right," he said after a long silence. "It is time."

    She didn't answer with words, simply reaching to squeeze his hand gently.

    They became aware of Qui-Gon not long after that, and turned to look at him. "Breakfast is ready," he said. "Come when you are."

    Obi-Wan glanced at Bant; she smiled and they got to their feet to follow the Knight.

    "What's the plan for today?" Qui-Gon asked when they'd finished. Well, when everyone but Obi-Wan had finished. He still ate more than everyone else. He was too startled by the question to be embarrassed.

    "What?" he asked.

    "I thought you'd like a free day today," Qui-Gon explained. "Bant must return to the temple tomorrow. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you sooner," he added gently. "I found out last night, and you had already gone to bed."

    Obi-Wan's mind spun, but one look at Bant and he knew what she wanted. He took a deep breath. "We had thought to start the Force exercises again, from the beginning, but with you." His voice cracked.

    Qui-Gon looked at him, then at Bant, and then back to him. "Are you sure?"

    "No," Obi-Wan said honestly. "But Bant had a good point last night, and now would be better, before I..." He trailed off.

    Qui-Gon nodded. "Very well. We will work this morning, and the afternoon will be yours."

    Obi-Wan's mind was oddly calm as they cleaned up, which was strange. He'd expected his thoughts to be gibbering in fear. But if he'd felt any fear, he'd let it go before recognizing it. That wasn't likely - he didn't even know if that were possible - so it was possible the fear simply hadn't set in yet.

    They settled on the grass outside, facing each other. Obi-Wan was surprised to find out he was shaking. "You must be calm," Bant said softly, and he slowly relaxed. Ever so gently her mind touched his, reminding him of a butterfly. Then, just as gently but with greater strength, he felt Qui-Gon join the bond. He shied away but the connection held, and he tried to calm the fear that welled up in him. He struggled to let it go, and it was working. He began to breathe easier.

    "Why don't you trust me?!" Master Denk's voice howled in his mind and Obi-Wan threw himself backwards, scooting across the grass away from Bant and the Jedi.

    When the panic passed, he lay flat on his back, one arm thrown up to ward off the expected blow. Slowly, that arm dropped to rest on the grass beside him, and he waited for his breathing to slow down.

    "Obi-
     
  5. Jane Jinn

    Jane Jinn Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 12, 2000
    So the Foilan knight wasn't Master Denk after all -- but is she the one who's causing this ominous presence, this dark feeling? Or is it Master Denk himself? Too many questions!

    It was good that Obi-Wan felt so comfortable with the idea of connecting with Qui-Gon, with Bant's help. He seems to have been making so much progress during Bant's visit, but now ... I'm worried!
     
  6. Padawan_Travina

    Padawan_Travina Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 5, 2002
    Ok Jill...

    You know its not nice to leave your readers hanging like this...

    First you build up their hopes and then bash them down in the very next part...

    That is just pure Evil my dear friend....

    Great chapter..but I suggest you post again soon please.....

    PT
     
  7. Jedi_Suzuran

    Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    May 22, 2002
    Darn those masters.

    *shakes fist*


    Too bad Bant had to go. :( Now they have to start all over again. :_|
     
  8. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 15, 2002
    Qui-Gon's going to have to work extra hard with Bant gone. But at least, Obi-Wan seems to be starting to trust Qui-Gon.

    This dark presence has me worried.
     
  9. Lieutenant_Page

    Lieutenant_Page Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 17, 2001
    Then, just as gently but with greater strength, he felt Qui-Gon join the bond.

    I can feel how werid that would be..having someone you don't know if you should trust joing in on a bond. It had to be werid.

    Who is this dark presence...my money is on Foilan knight.
     
  10. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 6, 2002
    I'm glad Obi was able to let him in on the exersizes, even if only briefly...

    Did every author here take cliff-hanger 101-107?

    Excellent job !
     
  11. PadawanKitara

    PadawanKitara Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 31, 2001
    There's this really contagious disease going around on alot of the threads right now. It's called cliffie-itis.

    And on top of that, this post seems to have created more questions than it answered.
     
  12. Sheila

    Sheila Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 6, 2002
    It looks like Obi-Wan is getting stronger and a little more trusting, but I hate that Bant had to go and now he feels this dark presence near! I need more information now! :D
     
  13. obaona

    obaona Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2002
    What is the dark presence? :confused: That's the question on my mind. 8-} Thing seem to be progressing for Obi-Wan at a reasonable pace - and his progress makes me :) . I also wonder if it was Qui-Gon's presence in his mind that kept the dark presence away. Just a thought. :)

    Anyway, great post! :D
     
  14. Tahiri

    Tahiri Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 9, 2001
    Dark presence -- old abusive master or not -- surely only leads to one thing: Obi-Torture! [face_devil] Nyahahahahaha 8-} Great post!
     
  15. kikeriki

    kikeriki Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Oct 23, 2002
    AAAH! I missed two chapters! And both were simply spectacular! Angst galore. Isn't it fun?

    Obi's Masters still need a firm beating. Travina, mind if I tag along on your mission of destruction? :D :D

    I'm glad that Obi's finally beginning to trust again.
     
  16. Just_Jill

    Just_Jill Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 17, 2002
    You readers are seriously awesome. Thanks so much!


    Jane Jinn - He seems to have been making so much progress during Bant's visit
    Two steps forward, one step back.

    Padawan_Travina - First you build up their hopes and then bash them down in the very next part...
    Are you telling me you want it to be easy? Where's the fun in that?

    Jedi_Suzuran - Darn those masters.
    Which, Obi-Wan's former Masters, or the Jedi Council?

    Cascadia - But at least, Obi-Wan seems to be starting to trust Qui-Gon.
    Something of a relief, eh?

    Lieutenant_Page - having someone you don't know if you should trust joing in on a bond.
    Wouldn't that be terrifying?

    my money is on Foilan knight.
    My poor, misunderstood Foilani Knight. You guys are heartless! :p

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter - I'm glad Obi was able to let him in on the exersizes, even if only briefly...
    It was nice of him, wasn't it?

    PadawanKitara - this post seems to have created more questions than it answered.
    I don't suppose that it's very comforting for me to say that it's only begun, and that's the way it's supposed to work?

    Sheila - I need more information now!
    Coming right up!

    obaona - Thing seem to be progressing for Obi-Wan at a reasonable pace
    Yes, they do, don't they?

    Tahiri - Obi-Torture!
    [face_laugh]

    kikeriki - Obi's Masters still need a firm beating.
    Yes, they probably do. :D


    Here is the requested "more".

    Just Jill
     
  17. Just_Jill

    Just_Jill Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 17, 2002
    Ch 8: "I'm on My Way to Lose My Mind" - Leatherwolf, Too Much

    Qui-Gon had a feeling that things were going to get bad from here. Something long buried had surfaced in Obi-Wan's mind, and the Knight hoped he would be up to what happened next.

    The afternoon was uneventful as they worked through lightsaber forms. But even that failed to lift Obi-Wan's spirits, and Qui-Gon didn't know how to help.

    "Need more help, do you?" Yoda asked that evening at his report.

    "No," Qui-Gon said, almost too sharply. "Having someone else here might make it worse. I just wanted you to know." The Council agreed.

    The next morning, Qui-Gon could nearly see the tension on Obi-Wan, and mentally prepared himself for something to break. The boy seemed balanced on a knife edge, his movements sharp, edged, like a living sculpture of glass shards.

    The morning lightsaber practice was easier, and then they sat outside in the shade of the large tree on the east side of the house to do the meditation exercises Obi-Wan had done with Bant. Qui-Gon expected it to be a battle.

    It was not as bad as he'd expected, but it was a battle. He could feel the boy's fear and frustration growing and he stopped the exercise. "Obi-Wan," he said gently. "Calm down and we'll start again."

    The look Obi-Wan shot him was full of venom, but he obediently closed his eyes. Slowly, fear and frustration drained out of him. Qui-Gon waited until the boy opened his eyes and nodded, still shaking but doing better. Qui-Gon gently reached out to Obi-Wan, noting that the spikes in the boy's mind were sharp again. Those spikes eased as he brushed them, withdrawing until their minds joined with a slight, almost familiar touch. The time passed, slowly, and next to him, Obi-Wan began trembling. Qui-Gon pulled away slightly, trying not to put pressure on Obi-Wan's mind. Oddly, the boy's trembling intensified, and finally the spikes made their reappearance. Qui-Gon withdrew.

    "Perhaps," he said, "we should work on how to keep people out before continuing with these exercises."

    Obi-Wan shrugged, his fingers twisting the grass. Qui-Gon waited until he looked up. "Is something wrong?" he asked.

    His answer came both mentally and physically. Obi-Wan lunged at him and a sharp spike bore into his shields. Attending to the mental attack took precedence. By the time he'd ascertained there was no real threat, the boy had gotten in three good hits, two to his chest and one to his jaw. Calling on the Force, he was able to intercept the boy's next two blows, catching his wrists. He would not use the Force to freeze the boy again, or the air around him. There had been too much terror for that, their first day together. Wrenching Obi-Wan sideways, Qui-Gon threw him to the ground, then pinned him down when he continued to struggle. He was strangely pleased to note that Obi-Wan had put on weight.

    Eventually, Obi-Wan stilled, and soon after, the mental attack withdrew as well. After a few moments, both to let him catch his breath and to make sure that the boy wasn't going to start struggling again, Qui-gon released him, rolled away out of reach and got to his feet.

    Obi-Wan lay still just long enough for Qui-Gon to begin to worry that he'd hurt the boy. Finally, though, the student pushed himself to his feet and turned to face the Knight. Qui-Gon was astonished at the amount of despair rolling off him. Obi-Wan stared at him in silence, and Qui-Gon waited for him to speak.

    "What do you want from me?" he finally asked.

    Qui-Gon's heart lurched, but he made sure his voice was steady. "From you?" he queried. "Your best. I told you when we started you would be great. And...." He stopped when Obi-Wan gestured sharply, and waited. This was not, perhaps, correct behavior from a Padawan - his or not - but it did seem to be something the boy had to work through. He really wanted to have a talk with his student's former Masters.

    "Are you going to tell me again that you aren't going to hurt me?" he demanded. "Because that's what they
     
  18. Padawan_Travina

    Padawan_Travina Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 5, 2002
    Are you telling me you want it to be easy? Where's the fun in that?

    OH there is a lot of fun....cause you dont end up killing your readers and your readers dont end up killing you...:)


    But WOW what a great chapter....Poor Obi..All those emotions and anger are finally starting to bubble to the surface...I just hope he learns that he can trust Qui-Gon and tell him what is going on...

    Cant wait to read more...Please post more soon

    PT
     
  19. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 6, 2002
    Of course, the chair held no answers.

    An excellent...but kinda cliffy ending. I really like the way Obi is developing...he just has so much pain and fear...I just have even more questions now, and more masters to kill.

    Excellent Job, but now I have to become a hunter of evil Jedi again

    *sigh*

    I love my work

    *Picks up sabre and starts hunting*


     
  20. Jane Jinn

    Jane Jinn Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 12, 2000
    I would have liked to have seen that scene from Obi-Wan's POV. What was he trying to do? What was he thinking? I'm wondering if he were tired of the suspense, tired of waiting for Qui-Gon to abuse him, so he attacked, and tried to provoke it, just to get it over with. He seems to be both expecting it from Qui-Gon and yet not expecting it, or perhaps just hoping that it won't come. Now, I have about as much understanding of psychology as your average Tauntaun, so it's hard for me to fathom why he seems to be waiting for Qui-Gon to do something bad to him, and yet the next minute, he talks to Qui-Gon about what his other masters did, or at least hints at it, as though he's confiding in him, just a little. If I thought that somebody was a potential enemy just waiting to pounce on and hurt me, the last thing I'd do is mention to him the other times I was hurt. Maybe I'll understand that dichotomy better by the end of the story, but right now I'm still wondering if Obi-Wan apologized because he really did feel sorry, or because he thought it was expected of him and would help put off the expected attack?

    I know, I know, you're not going to answer my questions. But maybe you'll respond to this: I did like the way in which Qui-Gon patiently bore all three attacks, was pleased that Obi-Wan had gained some weight, and even managed to get in some Jedi teachings along the way. That's my favourite master! :)
     
  21. Nicky

    Nicky Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Oct 25, 2002
    Very good chapter! I like the way you really take it slowly to get Obi-Wan to open up - and him lashing out because he doesn't know how to react to the kindness Qui-Gon is showing him is so credible... *sighs*

    Who/What is that dark presence in chapter 7? That female knight back from the temple?

    I'm always looking forward to reading more of this fantastic fic! So - hopefully - until tomorrow! :)

    Nicky
     
  22. Sheila

    Sheila Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 6, 2002
    Wonderful post but absolutely heartbreaking. I think Obi-Wan is so sure that all Masters will hurt him that he is trying to provoke a familiar response out of Qui-Gon. He doesn't know what to do around a master that is kind and patient. I hope he opens up soon and lets Qui-Gon (as well as the readers) know what those creeps did to him to get him in this condition.

    Thanks for the frequent posts. They are terrific! :D
     
  23. Lieutenant_Page

    Lieutenant_Page Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 17, 2001
    Wow...I never expected Obi-Wan to take down Qui-Gon. I hope Obi-Wan will relize that all masters are not like his former masters. Qui-Gon is there to help, not hurt him..but i can see why Obi-Wan is having touble trying to accept that; he's lived with the abuse and expects it from everyone.

    I like how you had Qui-Gon teach Obi-Wan a lession too..very nice :)
     
  24. PadawanKitara

    PadawanKitara Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 31, 2001
    That poor kid. He really is walking the edge opf an emotional cliff. And of Qui-Gon isn't careful, the kid might start to fall.
     
  25. Cicci

    Cicci Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 2002
    An intense and oh-so-good chapter. I must say it again Jill - I'm certainly glad you decided to share your wonderful writing with us.

    You describe the frustrated and tortured soul of Obi-Wan extremely well and I can tell that this is not going to be an easy road for anyone. I don't mind, that just means more of your excellent writing. Great job!
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.