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Saga Readjustment -- Obi-Wan vignette

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Knight_Aragorn, Sep 5, 2009.

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  1. Knight_Aragorn

    Knight_Aragorn Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2003
    Title: Readjustment
    Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Adi Gallia, Yoda
    Timeframe: Roughly around the Clone Wars

    Summary: War changes everything.

    Author?s Note: The Clone Wars is not an era I'm highly familiar with, so if there are inaccuracies ? and there probably will be, because wow, is that a complicated time in Star Wars history ? I can only apologise profusely.

    Many thanks to Gabri_Jade for her read-through. [:D]


    It was curious, Obi-Wan reflected, how a place could seem different by changing not at all. Sound was consumed by the high arches of the hall, the tread of his boots swallowed into an aching silence.

    Silence was waiting. Silence was the beat between the whine and impact of explosives. Silence was the end of a battle, that suspended moment before survivors regrouped and weapons deactivated, before the dead were counted and named.

    He could remember a time when silence was peace, but it seemed long ago.

    He nodded his greeting to a group of passing Jedi. A few, like him, were haggard, and wore their robes as though they didn?t quite fit. The others carried a peaceful air of clean invulnerability. They were the ones sequestered in the Temple, scholarly and dusty; they were those who had not fought.

    Anakin had vanished almost as soon as they made groundfall on Coruscant, evading the press of holoreporters that he used to pause and grin for. He would not be back until morning. Obi-Wan would pretend not to notice the absence, as he always did; in doing so, he was, perhaps, complicit to a violation of the spirit of the Code, but his authority was more spiritual than realised with Anakin no longer his apprentice, and overlooking Anakin?s lapses therefore involved merely bending morals rather than breaking them. A relief, if Obi-Wan was honest with himself.

    Anakin, of course, would take his silence for obliviousness, and would congratulate himself for the subterfuge. In many ways, he was nothing if not predictable.

    Obi-Wan turned the corner, passing through a patch of dying sunlight. Adi Gallia stepped from a meditation chamber ahead of him, her dark gaze falling on him as she turned. She smiled and her sense shifted, warming in greeting as she lifted a hand. ?Obi-Wan,? she said.

    ?Adi,? he returned, offering her a slight nod.

    It was only because he?d known her for so long that he was able to read the tiredness in her face. ?It?s good to see you back,? she said. ?It must be over a month.?

    ?Three, actually,? he said, offering a slight smile.

    ?Have you heard the latest from Muunilinst?? She was carrying datapads and a handful of flimsies. One of the datacards slipped, and Obi-wan caught it and the flimsi that fell with it. His reflexes were better than ever; sometimes, blinking awake in a portable shelter because a night bug had settled on his leg or someone had walked past outside, he wondered what it had felt like not to be forever on alert.

    He held onto the card and flimsi, as she seemed overloaded. ?Muunilinst??

    ?I don?t suppose you have,? she said with a faint frown. ?There have been indications that the Separatists are considering another push.?

    Obi-Wan felt a brief, bleak sense of something too resigned to be called dismay. ?Surely not,? he said. ?The battle in which they lost Muunilinst was costly enough. Attempting to re-take it would be foolhardy.?

    ?Are you trying to assign reason to our fickle opponents?? Adi lifted an eyebrow. ?At this point they are only murmurings. SBI is working to prevent it becoming anything more. We can?t afford a large-scale defence there now.?

    ?SBI doing something worthwhile? How novel.?

    Adi flicked him a look that held a sizable portion of concern. ?We would be in a difficult position without the intelligence the Senate Bureau provides.?

    ?I?ll concede their usefulness,? Obi-Wan said. ?But I can?t endorse all of their methods.?

    Adi pressed her lips together. They passed from the meditation corridor into the main hall, the air cooling in the vast open space. ?There are rumours,? she said. ?You?ve seen proof??

    Obi-Wan was>
     
  2. TheMacUnleashed

    TheMacUnleashed Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 2, 2009
    =D= This was a great look into how the war changed Obi-Wan. I liked how you noted Anakin's arrogance, and how Obi-Wan turned a blind eye to his constant disappearances- it's hard to believe that he wouldn't have noticed them.
     
  3. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Force Ghost star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 21, 2006
    Great insight in Obi-Wan during the Clone wars. and beautifully written.=D==D==D=
     
  4. Bri_Windstar

    Bri_Windstar Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 27, 2002
    OMG! An Obi-Wan story from you. OMG.

    If I scare you in my excitement, I'm sorry. :p *SNAGS*
     
  5. Gabri_Jade

    Gabri_Jade VIP star 5 VIP

    Registered:
    Nov 9, 2002
    *snags place in line* Be back asap. :D
     
  6. kataja

    kataja Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 4, 2007
    Subtle and fascinating - as ever! Not very familiar with this era myself I probably missed quite a few hints and details but I was captivated by this feeling of helplessness under great distress that sneaked into this story; first by Obi-Wans enstrangered feelings,then by Yoda's almost volatile mood and their exchange.

    Anakin had vanished almost as soon as they made groundfall on Coruscant, evading the press of holoreporters that he used to pause and grin for. He would not be back until morning. Obi-Wan would pretend not to notice the absence, as he always did; in doing so, he was, perhaps, complicit to a violation of the spirit of the Code, but his authority was more spiritual than realised with Anakin no longer his apprentice, and overlooking Anakin?s lapses therefore involved merely bending morals rather than breaking them. A relief, if Obi-Wan was honest with himself.

    Anakin, of course, would take his silence for obliviousness, and would congratulate himself for the subterfuge. In many ways, he was nothing if not predictable.


    Anakin's and Obi-Wands internal problems (some of them) spot on with
    ?I know how to handle Anakin,? Obi-Wan said. Perhaps it was defensive, but the reflex to deflect any comment and criticism of his training of Anakin was an old one, and was by now deeply ingrained.
    as the perfect add!=D=

    Great work with wonderfully many layers - again!!! =D= @};-

    I realize with regret that I've missed a few of your viggies lately! I'll do my best to catcg up!

     
  7. Gkilkenny

    Gkilkenny Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 27, 2004
    As the war intensified, they all changed, you described ObiWan's change beautifully.

    Good job.=D=
     
  8. kellilb

    kellilb Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Nov 8, 2005
    Wow, this was incredible. Your description of Obi-Wan's state of mind after being in war is so believable. He feels that war has changed him, and he also has a sense of foreboding. He senses, along with Yoda, that something bigger than the war is happening. Excellent work!
     
  9. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Stunning and magnificent characterization of Obi-Wan and Yoda. Wonderfully realistic of the emotional consequences of war in general and this time in particular for the Jedi Order as it declines. =D=

    @};-

     
  10. GeneralKenobi7

    GeneralKenobi7 Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 18, 2009
    Great vignette, you portayed Yoda and Obi-Wan perfectly (I liked Adi, too, but we don't see much of her normally)=D=
     
  11. nada_smith

    nada_smith Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jul 8, 2006
    What a haunting vignette! Obi-Wan seems caught between the past and future. His memories of the past are of a time that in retrospect seems secure and peaceful, his purpose was sure. Of course we know what the future holds, how his overlooking Anakin's foibles turns out. Yet in the present, he seems so disconnected. Even though the physical settings he knew from the past haven't changed, you do a great job of letting us see how they've lost their weight and reality. It's like he's a ghost revisiting old haunts. And not only the places that formerly offered certain peace have disappointed him...Master Yoda doesn't seem as infallible as before. It's so heartbreaking to know that Obi-Wan will soldier on until it all falls apart around him. This was a great piece!
     
  12. Valairy Scot

    Valairy Scot Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 16, 2005

    [blockquote]It was the room he most often pictured when he thought of the Temple while far away, its quietude and solemn peace somehow more fitting as an embodiment of his home and the Order itself than the echoing halls and lofty heights of the Temple?s superstructure.

    And yet ? walking through it now, he felt strangely adrift. It was a sensation akin to returning to a familiar room to find furniture marginally askew, a subtle wrongness that was undeniable and yet difficult to pinpoint ? except that perfect memory recall, for a Jedi, was a simple task, and training in awareness of detail began from infancy, so no Jedi would fail to notice misaligned furniture. And Obi-Wan could see nothing out of place or missing from the Room of a Thousand Fountains.

    It was exactly as he remembered it. Therein, he thought ironically, lay the difficulty.[/blockquote]

    The disconnect is within Obi-Wan himself. He has changed - and the Temple has not.

    This was almost haunting...truly a wonderful piece!
     
  13. Knight_Aragorn

    Knight_Aragorn Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2003
    Many apologies for the slow response. There really is no excuse, apart from a slack author. [face_blush]

    TheMacUnleashed: Thanks so much!

    earlybird-obi-wan: Thanks for reading! Glad there was some insight to be had. :D

    Bri: Hee. :p Obi-Wan has many charms, no?

    Gabri: *waves* You've already given feedback! I don't expect seconds. [:D]

    kataja: Thanks for the wonderful feedback as always. [:D] It's a very confusing era because there's just so much canon in this period, I think. Glad you enjoyed!

    Gkilkenny: True -- Anakin's the most obvious, but Obi-Wan seems to have gone through some angst too (or such is my poorly informed opinion, at least :p )

    kellilb: Thanks so much! I'm glad the foreshadowing wasn't too heavy. Glad you enjoyed.

    Jade_eyes: Thanks, glad you enjoyed. :D

    GeneralKenobi7: I was pretty much basing Adi on foggy memories of the JA era, so wasn't too sure about her characterisation myself. :p Glad that Obi-Wan and Yoda worked. Thanks for the feedback.

    nada_smith: Thanks so much! I'm pleased that Obi-Wan's sense of dislocation in what should have been a familiar setting worked. In one sense it's almost part of growing older, but at the same time the galaxy really is changing, so his perceptions aren't off at all. Great to hear your feedback, and thanks for reading!

    Valairy_Scot: Thank you. :D It's not an era I've written much in, so it was interesting to play around with where Obi-Wan is at this point, in a character sense. Very glad you enjoyed!

     
  14. Bri_Windstar

    Bri_Windstar Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 27, 2002
    I knew I'd find my way back eventually. I always do. :p

    This was just as good if not even better upon a reread. Obi-Wan is by far one of my favorite characters but I almost rarely seek out stories specifically about him or featuring him because, in my experience, he's been a hard one to get right (or my version of right, anyway, I'm a snob). This whole vig speaks volumes about Obi-Wan himself and the Jedi at large. You really have to think about what their mindset is post AOTC. They?re used to being defenders of peace, and from an OOU perspective, I suppose you could say that it?s nothing to see a Jedi raise their saber and fight and confront a ?bad guy?. IU, though, I really get the impression that those come case by case, Jedi by Jedi, and rare if ever is the day they battle something so continuously and on such a massive, intricate and interconnected scale. It?s something none of them is used to doing or even thinking about.

    How fragile but piercing an ache it must be to come home to a place you no longer recognize and feel an atmosphere that doesn?t belong, or worse, to feel as though you don?t belong, that you have been changed so subtly yet so profoundly that you violate your own sense of place and self.

    And the seemingly unintended destination of the Room of a Thousand Fountains is a really nice touch. How like Obi-Wan to seek out serenity and the call of life and living things, and to think of such a place in battle and war. I really like that he doesn?t think about it, that it?s just natural to him, which is (I gather) why Yoda would distinctly know to look for him there whereas Obi-Wan himself merely meandered there.
     
  15. Indra

    Indra Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Dec 31, 2003
    What a wonderful story. Very real how Obi-Wan feels that things around him have changed. Everyone who has been away from home for a while and whose life has changed in that time will be able to empathise. In this situation of course, it is much more severe considering all the things he has seen in the meantime. His weariness and even disillusionment come across perfectly and you managed that without changing the character. He's the Obi-Wan we know from Episode 2, just older. The talk with Adi about Anakin was a nice touch, Obi-Wan's defensiveness where Anakin's training is concerned. I can imagine him having a hard time at first as a very young Master. All around a wonderful read.
     
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