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Saga - PT Revenge ot the Sith Humorous VersionCONT'D (Add-On)(SPOILERS!)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by study3600, Dec 5, 2009.

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  1. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    [This script is an add-on, meaning, anyone can post parts of it, if you have a talent for writing or a sense of humor. I will post links to the other humorous versions on the last page. There are 7 main ones so far, some of which have two or three parts. Help is needed with three of them and three are complete. -study3600

    PS I am even now working on the compilations, and will notify you of their completion, and will create a websiute for them. 99.99999%of all jokes in the originals will be retained in the compilation. Missing will be redundancy and inconsistency, like Purp did with TPM HV Special Edition on Geocities in 1999 or so. And I give each person who contributed credit at the end of each compilation. For TPM HV most is lost and I was forced to redo most of it. That will be mostly fresh new jokes once completed, as I have said before, but once more I will give credit to every contributor there too.-B.LS."study3600"K.V]

    WARNING: POSSIBLE TFA, TLJ and TRoS SPOILERS!

    This is a continuation of a parody of Revenge Of The Sith written in Script format and told in the present tense started in 2005, and is the third chronologically of a series of Humorous Versions that started in 1999 with The Phantom Menace Humorous Version. This is a collaborative work, as were all the other Humorous Versions before it, meaning anyone can post parts of the story.

    A long time ago in the JCC....
    It was a time before the jump to Snowboards.
    When Speak, Darth Vacuous and Purp arose to create....
    The Star Wars Humorous Versions.
    This is the story of Star Wars told in a humorous and hilarious light.
    Or, in the words of Speak, keeping a humorous outlook if we so wish.
    And so we wished.
    And the saga is nearing completion.
    Please everyone peruse the Humorous versions which you can find links to at the bottom of this page, and help out. This is a round robin collaborative work and always has been, and anyone may post. I only ask that you follow the script at least loosely, keep constinstency and continuity with the rest of the humorous versions and have a blast.

    Also this is about communication so share your ideas with others and work together. We can have a lot of fun.

    Well I hope this prospers as it has in the past. Have a good day all.

    Brent



    http://boards.theforce.net/threads/revenge-of-the-sith-humorous-version-spoilers.19980768/


    This link is to the original ROTS Humorous Version thread, which is part 1.
    WE are now working on part 2 of the ROTS HV.

    Sadly, with the death of Geocities, went TPM HV as well. I and I'm sure many others have backups of the originals. We should do what we can with those.

    This died way back in 2005. Hopefully it can be reborn, completed and edited sometime, maybe in a year or two.

    It's too good to let remain dead before completion. To Jandor Tarvin: I was wrong. Please forgive me. Please come back. We could use your help.

    Also, here it is, from the best place to get movie scripts IMO,
    the Internet Movie Script Database,
    [link=http://www.imsdb.com/scripts/Star-Wars-Revenge-of-the-Sith.html]ROTS Script[/link]

    <Edited twice to make link work and again to post edit>This is GREAT! I might do a scene later. I'm only here at my uncle's for a few minutes+.
    Posted 7/3/05 All we ask is that everyone is consistant with what has already been established in previous posts and Humorous Versions. Other than that everyone can add whatever they want to make it as kooky or ridiculous as they want as long as they follow the story. That includes, if something has not been named, naming it.

    It has already been established, that:



    ANAKIN SKYWALKER is MANAKIN STREETWALKER

    OBI-WAN KENOBI is OB-EWAN McNOBI

    QUI-GON JINN is LI-GON GIN'N TONIC

    PADME AMIDALA is PATME AHMIDAAAAHLY...AHMADILY...DAHLI LAMA....ER, WHATEVER

    (In the case of her last name, be creative)

    CHANCELLOR PALPATINE/DARTH SIDEOUS is CAMEO PALPITATINE/DARTH CHIN

    YODA is YOGA

    CHEWBACCA/CHEWIE is CHUNKALUNK/CHUNKY and he is a COOKIE

    We're trying to get a DIFFERENT NAME for CORUSCANT every time we mention it

    and so on.

    You really should read the other Humorous Versions. They're quite funny.

    Well, I gotta go.


    PS JAB-JAB RINKS and CAPTAIN TYPHOON were killed off in AOTC Humorous Version.


    -study
    <edited a 4th thime, completedand, into two words, not one>
    <Finally, once more to post script.>
    <To err is human. Internet, not International. :) >
    <Edit: Put 'Humorous Version' and 'HV' in title of thread.>
    [Edit-2015 edit-Fixed original ROTS HV link so it actually takes you to the ROTS HV-B."study"L.S.]
    Edit-12/22/2015 made first post more relevant to today's situation and changed tag to SAGA- PT

    Mav Edit: Locked due to rules violation
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 25, 2021
  2. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    131 INT. CORUSCANT -JEDI TEMPLE ENTRY-NIGHT

    Manakin goes to the temple with a batallion of Clowntroopers.

    132 EXT OOPTAPOO-TENTH LEVEL-LANDING PLATFORM-DAY

    The battle between the clones and the droids rages through the sinkhole. OB-EWAN rides up to CLOWN COMMANDER COODY.

    OB-EWAN: Contact your troops. Tell them to move to higher levels.

    COODY: Peas.

    OB-EWAN: What?

    COODY: Oh, I have your sabre. You dropped it.

    Ob-EWAN takes it.


    OB-EWAN: Thanks. Peas?


     
  3. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    COODY: Would you like fries with that?

    OB-EWAN: Do you need a clone doctor?

    COODY: Carry on.

    OB-EWAN: (Shakes his head)

    He rides up the cliff on his LIZARD

    Then COODY's holo comm unit is activated and we see a holo of DARTH CHIN.

    COODY starts choking.

    CHIN: You left out the fries, you idiot! You beamed my cheeseburger and no FRIES!

    COODY: Gak! Sorry master!

    Chin releases him.

    CHIN: Execute Order 69!

    COODY: At once, my Lord.

    Suddenly all the clones start killing each other and the droids all dance.

    CHIN: Oops! I mean Order 71.

    COODY: Oh! Duh!




     
  4. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    He gestures towards OB-EWAN:

    COODY: Blast him!

    OB EWAN falls into a stagnant marsh, out of sight of the CLOWNS.

    OB-EWAN: Gak! Pht! Ick!


    INT. CORONATION- JEDI TEMPLE- ROOM FULL OF SCARED, HUDDLED, INNOCENT CHILDREN

    Ray shields and Jandor Tarvin escort children onto a waiting ship before Manakin arrives.

    MANAKIN enters to find them all gone. He sees a note left behind. He reads it: See you on MUFASA. I'm going to help OB-EWAN kick your Sith A**, punk.


     
  5. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    Edit[redunant]
     
  6. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    Short notice, but I try.

    EXT. MOSQUITO-DAWN

    The sky slowly awakens to the crystal world of MOSQUITO. A battle rages. Clown troops battle the droid armies across a bridge. KI-ADDI-MONEY MONEY uses his brightsabre to deflect enemy fire. Clone Commander Baakura (THX-1138) exits a gunship near the entrance to the city. He rallies his troops to attack the city, then gets a message on his commlink.

    DARTH CHIN: Time for Order 87.

    BAAKURA: Okay.

    The clones all start doing the chicken dance. The robots do (what else) the Robot.

    DARTH CHIN: Dang! I mean Order 72!

    BAAKURA: I can't do that in a PG-13 rated film, master.

    CHIN: Oh, right. 71, then.

    BAAKURA: Yes, My Lord, at once.


     
  7. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999



    The Clown Commander looks to the main plaza of the city where KI-ADI leads the charge. The clones drive him to the bridge then force him off. They push a boulder after him. Surviving this (First Jedi Rule: Survive, after all), he easily swims away dodging blaster fire from the clones.

    BAAKURA: Idiot! We could have shot him!

    CLONE CAPTAIN COPY OF COPY: Sorry, sir.
     
  8. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999




    If I can find it I'll post a Dramatis Personae at the top of the page. I created one in another one of the Prequel Era spoof threads, and it will help tremendously, probably me too.

    Done.
     
  9. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    Well I'm bringing this up to the top. I'm attempting to republish the Phantom Menace Humorous Version online but it will be a big job. I hope someone joins in soon. I don't want to hog Order 71. :)
     
  10. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999





    I hope someone sees this and at least comments. I'll even take constructive criticism.

    If anyone has ideas for those scenes tell me and I can edit them in.

    Will someone speak up?

    Anyone?
    Anyone?
     
  11. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    EXT. FALLUJA-FOREST-DAY

    A column of Clown Walkers marches across the forest floor. The Jedi Ayee Security and her clown troops brace for an ambush.

    JAB-JAB RINKS: Steady, steady.

    AYEE: What are you doing here? That's my line.

    JAB-JAB: My no know. Mesa going away now, okeday?

    Clone Commander Blight moves up behind the Jedi. They look around.

    AYEE: Do you think they're droids?

    BLIGHT: No, but that's an awfully annoying Glub-glub over there.

    AYEE: I agree.

    Suddenly all the clowns point their guns at the Jedi.

    AYEE(thinking fast): I'll give you all 30 thousand Republic Dactaries apiece if you hunt down that Glub-glub over there and bring me his head. Right from the Jedi Treasury.

    They all run after the Glub-glub.

    AYEE: Idiots. There is no Jedi Treasury.

    She flees.
     
  12. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    Here are the links to all the current Humorous Versions. I have the entire TPM Humorous Version printed out and a website to publish it on. But if anyone else has a backup copy they can feel free as well. Hope you enjoy.


    [See BELOW]
     
    Last edited: Jun 13, 2021
  13. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    EXT. CATO NEMATODA-CLONE FIGHTER COCKPIT-DAY

    Clown watches a hologram of DARTH CHIN.

    CHIN: I haven't gotten this right yet, so pay attention: Order 71.

    CLOWN: What do you want me to order 71 of, master?

    CHIN: The Jedi! Kill the blasted Jedi!

    CLOWN PILOTS attempt to knock PLO-RAKOON out of the sky. PLO, sensing danger immediately (After all, do you think a wise Jedi Master would implicitly trust a bunch of clones?)manoevers away safely, taking a few clones out in the process.
     
  14. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    EXT- SALAMI-SHAMI- FOREST-DAY

    Three speeder bikes race through the forest, a Jedi- SOUSSED ALE-is in the lead. THe two clones following her attempt to drop back to get a clear shot at her but do not see the big tree behind them. They explode in a big fireball.

    GL: What about all the continuity issues these surviving Jedi will cause?

    study3600: Oh boo hoo.
     
  15. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    EXT. KASHEW- EDGE OF VILAGE- DAY

    Two Clowntroopers comes up behind YOGA but he just turns around and says:

    YOGA: There's no danger here. We made it after all.

    The Clowntroopers explode.
     
    Last edited: Jun 13, 2021
  16. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    I don't know where this next post ranks on the funniness scale but there's not much I can do with this next scene. Perhaps someone can do it better?

    INT. CORUSCANT (I'D CALL IT A PARODY NAME BUT THIS IS A PRETTY SERIOUS SCENE HERE)-PATME'S APARTMENT-NIGHT

    SEE-STINKY-O and PATME look out the apartment window.

    STINKY-O: The Cameo's office indicated that Manakin has returned to the Jedi Temple to "take care of some buisiness with the children there." Don't worry, m'Lady, he'll protect them.

    PATME: I have word from Jedi Master Jandor Tarvin Manakin tried to slaughter them.

    STINKY-O: I'm so confused!
     
    Last edited: Jun 13, 2021
  17. BrentSohlden

    BrentSohlden Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Jan 6, 2010
    <I'm the same person as study3600 BTW. Its my "RL" name.>

    EXT. KASSHEW - HILLS OVERLOOKING LAKE - DUSK

    YOGA stands with two COOKIES, CHUNKALUNK and TAFFY.

    YOGA: Goodbye Chunkalunk and Taffy, miss you, I will. Good friends you are, even if you really smell. For your help-

    CHUNKY barks and yells angrily at YOGA.

    YOGA: Okay, you don't smell. But I would recommend a bath for both of-

    CHUNKY and TAFFY move threateningly towards YOGA, and YOGA runs toward the COOKIEE POD, jumps in, and takes off.

    INT. COOKIEE POD - COCKPIT

    YOGA downs a bottle of Surge and throws the bottle on the floor.

     
  18. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    Sorry, just saw that its not open for further replies. Thought it was.
     
  19. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    Can I post here? This is a test.
     
  20. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    Let me see what I can do with this.
    Any help here would be hot.
    This is a collaborative work.

    EXT. CAPTAIN-ANT- CITYSCAPE-PRE-DAWN

    The city planet is covered in a hazy glow. A column of black smoke arises from the distance. BAILY SMITS ' Speeder flies overhead, straight toward the smoke.

    EXT. CORRECT-STANCE - JEDI TEMPLE -LANDING PLATFORM -PRE-DAWN

    Jedi younglings are busy slaughtering CLOWN TROOPS and putting their BODIES in a big BONFIRE, thus the smoke.
    BAILY SMITS lands his speeder on a Jedi Temple platform. FOUR JEDI YOUNGLINGS stand guard at the entrance to the TEMPLE. BAILY gets out of his Speeder and walks toward the YOUNGLINGS.

    BAILY: What's going on here?

    JEDI YOUNGLING 1: There's been a rebellion. The Clown Troopers have gone nuts. Don't worry, the situation is under control.

    BAILY: Thank God!

    JEDI YOUNGLING 2: You had better go and do what you can to help the Jedi. The Clones are trying to kill us for some reason.

    BAILY: And so I must. I never trusted them anyway.

    BAILY gets in his Speeder, which takes off into the cityscape.

     
  21. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
  22. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    Final thread: Goodbye all. I will be leaving theforce.net and abandoning the Humorous Versions. You guys can continue these if you wish. Have a good day and God bless you all.
     
  23. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    I'm back, will be posting here shortly!
    C'mon We're almost done With the Prequel Trilogy!
    I is done.
    II is done!
    Now let's all of us come together and tackle III!
    Then we can finish the original Trilogy by finishing VI, and we can work on VII in the meantime while we're doing the rest. Its time for a new generation of creative humorous writers to arise, as well as as many of the older more experienced ones that we can get! The more, the merrier! Let's get started!

    Hm, no takers? Could use help. Wonder why no one's even commenting......What do people know about me that I don't know? Is it the same reason I haven't been able to get my website off the ground???
     
    Last edited: Jun 11, 2021
  24. study3600

    study3600 Jedi Grand Master star 3

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 1999
    o i see i haven't posted the links to the first two parts of this script. that would be helpful.

    The other movie and movie script-based Humorous Versions:
    https://boards.theforce.net/threads...version-repost-2010-humor-silliness.30643704/
    TPM HV-The beginning, some of it begging to be replaced by the Original......

    II is complete, and is here:
    https://boards.theforce.net/threads...on-complete-spoilers-of-st-possibly.50056272/

    III is incomplete and parts 1 and 2 can be found here:

    https://boards.theforce.net/threads/revenge-of-the-sith-humorous-version-spoilers.19980768/
    ROTS HV PART I

    https://boards.theforce.net/threads...contd-add-on-spoilers.30602068/#post-30602068
    ROTS HV PART 2 (back to top)

    IV is finished but not compiled, here:

    https://boards.theforce.net/threads/a-new-hope-humorous-version.177852/
    ANH HV


    V is finished , but not fully compiled, and is here:

    https://boards.theforce.net/threads/esb-humorous-version-spoilers.203134/
    ESB HV PART 1

    https://boards.theforce.net/threads...morous-version-contiued-st-spoilers.50056267/
    ESB HV Part 2

    VI is incomplete, and can be found here, PART I-The CONCLUSION:

    https://boards.theforce.net/threads/rotj-humorous-version.1854753/
    ROTJ HV Part 1

    https://boards.theforce.net/threads/return-of-the-jedi-humorous-version-spoilers-contd.19294988/
    ROTJ HV PART 2

    https://boards.theforce.net/threads...umorous-version-conclusion-spoilers.50036041/
    ROTJ HV PART 3


    VII is Incomplete and is barely started, here:
    https://boards.theforce.net/threads/the-force-awakens-humorous-version-spoilers.50036141/
    TFA HV
     
    Last edited: Jun 13, 2021
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