Before - Legends "Serpent-Spawn", 08/08/2011 paintings added

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by AzureAngel2, Jan 12, 2008.

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  1. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005
    Words of introduction:

    Title: "Serpent-Spawn", an attempt to tell early Tusken history


    Editors: @DarthUncle & @SWpants

    Time frame:
    during the Clone Wars, but actually long before even the Old Republic existed

    Rating: PG

    Note: Please be aware that this story contains scenes of violence and self-harm, and references to abuse and trauma recovery!

    On Aargonar Anakin Skywalker touches an amulet that is in possession of General A'Sharad Hett. Overwhelmed by emphatic powers his mind travels back into the early historical roots of the Tusken raiders. He comes to know more of their fierce nature and their dark secrets.

    Disclaimer: SW is owned by George Lucas and Lucas Lt. !!!

    One of the CW comic books made me rather curious about General A'Sharad Hett and the Tusken. I started to ask myself: where did the Tusken came from originally? Did they always live on Tatooine? Why do they hide their faces? What makes them so fierce? Is there an old hatred that drives them forward? Have they been humans once? Or are they a mixed species? Could their desert robes hide some tragic facts and figures?

    Then my pointer finger ran over a map with all the planets of the SW universe. Automatically it stopped over the outlines Unknown Regions and suddenly a wild story was spinning in my mind, weaving a lot of things together.

    I must be honest that there was also a plot that I did weave 20 years ago with a friend of mine in order to explain for ourselves who the mother of the Skywalker twins was. We did invent our own SW universe back then, but she never went on with it at a certain point. Oh yes, went I went to Dublin as an Au-Pair in summer 1996.

    Anyway, when I left my ex in summer 2003 I was full of anger. But, as you all may know, anger leads to the Dark Side of the Force and I did write two Fantasy-SF books for myself to get at peace with myself within 7 months.

    Most of my friends of course were keen on reading my scripts and were surprised to find nothing SW based in them at all. The original plot did intrigue them though.

    Some friends, who did language and/ or cultural studies, also tried to help me to find mistakes and/ or to make suggestions for the German text.

    Now that SW plays a big part in my life again since I joined the boards (and found the big love of my life here!!!) I asked myself again if it would be possible to link those books again with the SW universe. So I started re-working the story and translating it bit by bit into English.

    Here we go:


    A mixture of shame, hate, confusion and curiosity ran through Anakin Skywalker while he looked at General A'Sharad Hett. It was curiosity that won in the end. In the burning midday sun of Aargonar his burning eyes focused on the Tusken´s tattoos.

    There were lines that moved like snakes over hollow cheek bones, tiny spots where darkness seemed to gather into a mighty force. Other curious ornaments lay still like a predator waiting for a victim.

    Those tattoos in particular reminded Anakin of something, or better to say, of somebody: Asajj Ventress, one of Count Dooku´s Force-sensitive Dark Acolytes.

    With a shiver Anakin shrugged that thought quickly away. He did not wish to be reminded of his first duel with her on Yavin 4. Nor did he intend to call an even older memory back into his mind: the sith apprentice Darth Maul attacking Qui-Gon on Tatooine. The face and body of the Zabrak also had been tattooed with ancient symbols which gave evidence of his complete dedication to the discipline of the dark side of the force.

    Anakin sighed, trying to get rid of all the sad memories that came to the surface like a Gouka Dragon.

    The defence of Aargonar had already drawn a lot of strength from him.

    The ambush on their gunship.

    Bhat´s death due to severe crash injuries and his broken body left carelessly in the desert by his own master with some lame
    Last edited: Apr 18, 2020
  2. Darth Gangrenous

    Darth Gangrenous Chosen One star 10

    Jun 1, 2005
    Well done, Nicole! [:D] I can't wait to read what happens next. :D Please PM me when you update.
  3. NLSkywalker

    NLSkywalker Jedi Youngling

    Jun 8, 2005
    Good job! And I can't wait to read more;)
  4. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    Jippee a story about the Tuskens. Great beginning and just put me on your PM list
  5. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005
    *beams at DG, NL and the bird!*

    Thanks for reading, guys!

  6. DarthUncle

    DarthUncle Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Mar 20, 2005
    I really liked to read that scene from the clonewars SW comic that your prologue is inspired upon, and I longed to know if there was more to be said about the tusken, who we have known from the 1st movie on, but of who we learned little, apart from them being fearless, nomadic, adapted to the desert, and feared and despised by the moisture farmers. I'm intrigued by your start, and long to find how the tusken raiders became what they are now and how your story will tell their evolution.
  7. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005
    *loves a certain sith lord here very much for being such a sweet companion, great cook, outstanding support, big fun to live with and a crudely teddy bear for her when needed!*

    Due to you, beloved, I found the courage to express myself again via paintings and words. I love you. You are the compass of my heart!

    Okay, here we go on with more of Chapter 1 of "Serpent-Spawn":


    I rolled my eyes when the name of the reptilian race of our neighbour planet Draconis fell, but I allowed Luçien to take my hand and to lead me to our camp fire. There he dried first me and then himself with a blanket.

    ?We should not forget and we should not forgive, never ever!? he roared out in between. ?The sword of revenge will wipe them out one fine day. Especially the royal family Tjiehenet will pay for all the war crimes they committed. Their god queens are bloodthirsty monsters with hearts of stone.?

    Then he remained strangely quiet for a good while, staring into the night sky where Draconis dim shape was to be seen. I disliked the new patterns of behaviour that Luçien showed since his trials. What ever he had been confronted with during those trials, it had left a mark on his soul.

    ?Please get dressed now!? Even though his plea was spoken softly, I could not help to overhear the urgency in his words. ?You should not get a cold. I will make a decent cup of coffee for us in the meantime.?

    While Luçien quickly slipped into his dark blue guard robes and went over to the samovar, I dressed myself layer by layer: first my cotton underwear, then my wide trousers, followed by my brocade caftan with its flower ornaments, then my half-veil made out of gaze cloth and at last my warm, heavy travel coat made out of bantha hair.

    My entire garments were wine red, my favourite colour since early childhood days. The mobile clan quarters of the noble family Riwalan had been in that very colour, too. In my dreams I still saw them swim like giant sails in the dune sea, unharmed by the fire the warriors from the House Ankou had set to them.

    Quickly I repressed all my sad memories of fire, blood and death.

    I was an adopted daughter of the House Ankou now.

    My past as a member of the Riwalan family got buried together with the dead bodies of my mother?s relatives.

    ?Have a seat!? suggested Luçien.

    I took one of the satin pillows that he had taken with him from the homestead and sat down next to him.

    He put a porcelain mug into my hands. ?What I will tell you know is the honest truth about our race. How it came to life and why we are here.?

    Before I was able to speak out my thoughts, he did put a finger on my lips to shush me.?No, Isabeau. Forget about Sodalith and Calme! I will give you the secret knowledge that the Elder Ones possess.?

    My eyes went wide open. ?You would trust me with the secret knowledge of the Council??

    ?Because you can behave quiet reasonable and lady like at times. Your mother Chaleur was known for her nobility and wisdom. Perhaps all this qualities will show up in you one fine moon day.?

    I was not sure whether to feel flattered or annoyed. Luçien gave me this mixed feeling quiet often. He reached out with his arms and drew me close to him. I made myself cosy and comfortable.

    ?A long time ago, in a galaxy far away the inhabitants of a dying star system made it to this sector. They settled down on Draconis, because it reminded them of their own lost planet.?

    I carefully sipped from my cup and cuddled myself even closer into his embrace.

    ?But destiny had followed them to their new home. Creatures from their ancient fairy-tales arrived with star ships. They asked for asylum. The wish was granted by the god queen Tamaris who ruled Draconis at that time.

    Many moons passed. Ophidiae were born and died.

    The Others also got many children, but they are a race that is blessed with unnatural long life. None of them died within a hund

    MASTERANNIE Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jul 31, 2005
    Oh, Azure, I hadn't read the first chapter!!! Loving this story, please keep writing it!!!! [:D]
  9. Darth Gangrenous

    Darth Gangrenous Chosen One star 10

    Jun 1, 2005
    More please? [face_praying]

  10. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    Intriquing update and very well written.=D= Great characters
  11. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005
    Dear Annie, the first chapter is not finished yet and there will be still much to be read & hopefully enjoyed, bella!

    Sweet Frank, as I said: first portfolio matters and exam preparations. Then I will go on. The entire text exists in German and I must root it into the SW universe again somehow.

    Beste bird, je bent een schat! You really are a darling! And thanks for the inspiration!

    Here we go again a bit further:


    It is tradition to seek a sanctuary after a long, hard hunting party. A place that men are only allowed to enter with the allowance of it?s female inhabitants: the serail.

    When I was still a daughter of the dune sea, my mother?s humble tent had been the serail of my tribe. There had been nothing more than animal furs to sit on and in the middle had stood a samovar made out of copper. My mother had shared her tea supplies very generous with her sisters, cousins and aunts. The women had met on a daily basis. They had told stories to each other and had sung songs. Love, happiness and laughter had filled our camp.

    The women in papa?s harem did not sing with one another. Even their laughter was unnatural. There was a constant competition going on: about a respectable hunt, about dresses, about the education of their children and about papa?s attention. Some of them left their food untouched when a rival was in sight. They even passed on their hatred to their offspring. It was a disgrace.

    Only Solitaire, the fifth and youngest wife of my father, had a special place in my heart. She was not a bit like the other women, neither by her exotic looks nor by her wild and free spirit, for she was an étrangère from Draconis: a serpent-spawn. Each of her movements was elegant and floating, but in a different way than that of my people. The colour of her skin was like that of coffee and her black hair was short and curly. Her voice was deep and pleasant.

    It was her eyes though that did frighten me at times, to be honest. They were green in a very unnatural way. Their iris shone with the cold light of gemstones. Each time she looked at me it was as if she would look beyond the mere flash and bones. It seemed as if she would dare to explore the very contents of my heart and soul in those bewildering moments.

    There were rumours about the Ophidiae. For example: that they were mind readers, all of them. And that they possessed many powers that some considered unnatural.

    A soft, teasing breeze, coming from the depths of the desert, played with my half-veil in a rather teasing way.

    I took a grip of myself.

    The serail.

    The Ophidiae.

    My step-brother´s duties for the home stead and papa.

    In the dune sea I always was very far away from that. Then there was just me, my lance and the desert. Everything else stepped aside then.

    Luçien handed me my lance. A child?s lance still, not that of an honoured huntress of the homestead. Sooner or later I would need to undergo the rites of womanhood, but not now.

    ?Let?s go back home!? Luçien said.


  12. Tyranus230

    Tyranus230 Jedi Master star 7

    Feb 16, 2005
    Good work! :) I hope to see updates in the future.
  13. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005
    Once I am finished with my stupid portfolio and my Dutch exams... yes, Ty, I will try to give my uttmost then.
  14. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    Love those insights in her life in the tribe.

    Great update.
  15. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005
    Thanks, dear bird. There will be more soon!

    *goes back to work on university matters!*
  16. arissiafett

    arissiafett Jedi Master star 1

    May 14, 2007
    I love it!
    More please!!!
  17. Darth Gangrenous

    Darth Gangrenous Chosen One star 10

    Jun 1, 2005
    Good luck on the exams and the portfolio, Nicole. [:D] I will be patient for the next update. :)
  18. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005
    Thanks all of you!

    *hugs her padawan and DG before running of to her next lesson!*
  19. Cem_Fel

    Cem_Fel Jedi Master star 4

    Mar 14, 2006
    [:D] I really like the story, I think it will be able to keep me away from learning for some time to read it ;)

    It's exciting, I like the characters, except Lucien, I'm not sure, if I like him... And I know, there are only two characters right now :p

    =D= you are writing pretty good!
  20. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005
    Well, you know me, dear Cem! :D

    Soon there will be an army of character that are linked together in very strange ways. The plot will explode!

    Okay, we move along with the story line:


    I turned around to face our two loyal pack animals that had been waiting for us patiently at the edge of the lake.

    Crépuscule and her brother Argent had been bred in papa?s own stables. He had the finest and most noble eopies under the twin moons of Sapuhru. They were as fast as the desert winds themselves.

    Crépuscule, a ten moon year old mare, bent her milk-white neck down gracefully when she saw me coming. I returned her that very favour and bowed in return.

    Eopies were proud creatures, easily offended. Dealing with them was always a question of fine manners.

    When I looked up again, Crépuscule keeled on the rough sand and I could easily mount her. The leather of the saddle creaked slightly when I did. I actually hated to ride her with a full harness, but papa insisted on it, calling it a matter of security. I found it more annoying for the mare herself. Even though she hadn?t been born under the free sky, I felt ashamed to let her carry the burden of a leather saddle and a holster.

    Luçien passed by casually and kissed me lightly on the forehead. ?Silly me, I always thought you enjoyed ridding!?

    I stared at him puzzled. At times I found his ability to spot my very thoughts frightening. ?What?? I gasped.

    His deep laughter had a calming effect on me. ?Your worried looks, each time you mount her, tell me a lot of stories. And it is also not the very nature of your lovely face to hide what you are thinking. You should practice in front of a mirror. Our honoured mothers are mistresses of deceit.?

    ?Bah!? I lifted up my nose. ?Mirrors are instruments of vanity and in some cases? vain. Have you ever a came across a mirror in the dune sea? What need should I have for it? I cannot ride it. I cannot eat it. I cannot drink it. See, it?s is an unusable item after all.?

    His laughter increased. ?You truly belong into the desert, my wild and beautiful sister.?

    I raised an eyebrow. ?Beautiful. Me??

    His voice became very tender. There was also pride swinging in his words. ?Well, what I can spot is: a girl of fourteen with skin like shimmering bronze. The proud way she holds up her head makes her a bit bigger than she actually is. She has a lovely face with high cheek bones and a very small nose. Amazing, as nosy as she is, this nose should definitely be as big as the snout from an eopie.?

    Crépuscule made a mocking sound as though she could understand each single word that Luçien spoke.

    ?Your slanted eyes ? set in humanoid features ? show clearly that you are a Lidérc with an ancient trace of men blood in her veins, Isabeau. There is no white in them and your pupils are almost round due to night time. Your hair has the colour of a chestnut tree. Normally it falls your back in soft waves, yet at present it is towered up with the clasps I gave you as a birthday present.?

    Argent suddenly moved behind him and pushed Luçien slightly forward with his entire head. The impatience of the hot blooded stallion did not seem to bother her step-brother too much. He spoke on with a casual tone.

    ?And there is a moon shaped, red bindu on your forehead, showing that you have a very high position in the homestead of papa.? Luçien smirked out of a sudden. ?This very high position also comes with a lot of duties. Duties which you dislike as much as your hair dislikes to be held up by clasps. Yes, you should indeed waste no time in front of the mirror to look like a presentable lady. It is pointless.?

    Before I could blink, Luçien was in his saddle and strode past me.

    With a raised fist I mounted Crépuscule. ?You will regret your words, brother. Wait until I get hold of you!?

  21. Beta-Commando

    Beta-Commando Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jul 4, 2007
    I found another story I wouldn't mind rereading, here on the forums! Amazing! Please, please PM me when you next update! [face_praying]

    Thanks for a wonderful story! [:D]
  22. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    Beautiful AzureAngel2, you are giving such nice descriptions of the Tusken.
  23. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005
    First, a big, big thanks to my sweet e-son DG who is so kind to check out my up-dates for Germanisms and mistakes that an English mother speaker wouldn´t do! Frank, you are great!

    Then, thanks Beta, consider yourself to be on my PM list!

    And as for you, dear Bird: bedankt! But remember, at present they don´t consider themselves as Tusken yet. Isabeau´s people still have a long way to go.

    I must admitt that the DARTH BANE book, that a dear DG send me & my beloved master DU all the way from the US to the Netherlands, gave me some new ideas recently.

    I also have brought DUNE, THE BUTLERIAN JIHAD recently. I find it great that Brian Herbert and Kevin J. Anderson sat down together to sort out the old papers of Frank Herbert. The words of the princess Irulan in the beginning of that very book did deeply impress me:

    "Any true student must realize that History has no beginning. Regardless of where a story starts, there are always earlier heros and earlier tragedies.

    Before one can understand Muad´Dib or the current Jihad that followed the overthrow of my father Emperor Shaddam IV, one must understand what we fight against. Therefore, look more than ten thousand years into our past, ten millenia before the birth of Paul Atreidid.

    It is there that we see the founding of the Imperium, how an Emperor rose from the ashes of the Battle of Corrin to unify the bruised remnants of humanity..."

    This text did deeply impress me and I keept the first two sentences in mind.

    I must confess that I did read some other books inbetween continuing this one: HANNIBAL RISING by Thomas Harris, NORTHANGER ABBY by Jane Austen, the comic book HET AFZIEN VAN 2007, FOKKE & SUKKE by Reid, Geleijnde & Van Tol, A BREATH OF SNOW AND ASHES by Diana Gabaldon, KUSHIEL´S SCION by Jaqueline Carey, MIDDEN IN DE WINTERNACHT, KERSTVERHALEN, LIEDJES EN RECEPTEN by Ineke Verschuren, THE HOGFATHER by Terry Prachett and STAR WARS, DARTH BANE, PATH OF DESTRUCTION by Drew Karpyshyn.

    And also some text passages from the prologue of HANNIBAL book did stick in my mind:

    "Here in the hot darkness of his mind, let us feel together for the latch. Finding it, let us elect for music in the corridors and, looking neither left or right, go to the Hall of the Beginning where the displays are most fragmentary.
    We will add them to what we have learned elsewhere,..."

    But what made me transfere my own ideas back to the SW universe, were the following sentances from the brilliant mini-series TERRY PRACHETT´S HOGFATHER from 2007:

    "It was some time after this creation when most people forgot that the very oldest stories of the beginning are, sooner or later, about blood."

    So this were I got my personal kick to re-write my two books... it is a story about blood and the beginning of things!

    Thanks for reading anyway! And here is the up-date:


    After a while the smells and sounds of the market lay behind us. We rode along the windowless façades of rock apartments which lay close to one another. Most buildings had three stores, being linked to one another with staircases that had no banisters.

    Being trapped in a stone cage that had thick iron doors and the doubtful luxury of foreign words was not the life I was born for. I was raised to the life of a future herder for my tribe: a bergére. I would have been ceremonially presented with a bantha of the same age, as a companion for life. A bond would have forged between us.

    The very night that the paths of the Houses Ankou and Riwalan had crossed in the open desert was the time when my destiny had changed. My true father Chemin had died, holding my twin brother Matin in his arms. All his skills with his crescent-moon-shaped sabre had not saved them.

    As quick as the hurtful glimpse of memory stole back into my heart I buried it with the sand of the present. I had been left alive that fateful night. And even more, I got adopted. A tradition that was more common with the desert tribes than with the
  24. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Jun 14, 2005

    Okay a little check inbetween, concering my visible PM list for story-up-dates:

    Darth_Gangrenous, dear DG who also corrects things!!!
    DarthUncle, master and commander who cooks for us when I forget about it!!!
    Tyrannus230, also an old JC friend
    earlybird-obi-wan, a great fanfic writer and fantastic fanart artist
    Cem_Fel who turned me into a dark lady
    Masterannie who is busy but keen on reading
    NLSkywalker a great fanfic artist
    Beta-Commando who stumbeld over this fanfic

    Anymore? Anyone? Dust? Yes? No? Dust!


    I should quitt watching the commedy series LITTLE BRITAIN, sorry!
  25. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    Beautiful again these thoughts of her and what is happening? eager to read more.
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